Hi,
How’s it going? Hey yesterday I was at a charity walk
and bumped into some people who were actually on my
subscriber list. That was really interesting.
Someone happened to hear my name and then put it
together that I was “that guy” that ran several
bipolar disorder sites.
This happen before. One day I was talking to
a realtor and she realized that I was the
person who was sending her emails. So for
all of those that email me, “are you a
real person?” I am.
Okay, on with today’s story. This is really
sad. A couple of months ago, I wrote how
I had a friend who’s wife has bipolar disorder.
I told you how I gave him all my courses/guides
and material for F.REE.
I told you how my friends wife was really out
of control. They also have kids. She drinks.
She does a lot of bad things because she is
not under the right treatment plan.
My friend was really worried. He said
that he really needed to talk to me several
months ago. We spoke. He said that he needs
help dealing with his wife. I asked him
if he read my material on supporting someone
with bipolar disorder. He said no. Why I asked?
He said “well I didn’t have time.” I was kind
of mad.
Anyway he went on and on about some of the
the things his wife was doing. SOME. BUT
I know some supporters put “spin” on it.
Meaning they don’t tell the truth. He was
quick to say to me, “but my wife is not
like your mom. She isn’t that bad.” That
personally kinds of offends me. Maybe it
doesn’t. Well it kind of does. Why?
Well I found out my friends wife did the
following:
hit him over the head with a spot
cut him many times
Threw objects at him
Lies to his kids about him
Calls the police on him
Attacks him at random
Gets totally out of control after drinking
Takes his important papers in the mail
and throws them away.
Let me say, my mom NEVER did things like
this. My mom threw a phone at me once
but my mom is no baseball player. The kid
that lives next door who is 10 could have
threw it better :). LOL.
She did also take a swing at me once. That’s
it. My mom never cut anyone, drank, or did
the kinds of things my friend’s wife was
doing.
He said his wife was a great person and
that he didn’t want to say bad things about
her and he was concerned that he didn’t
want to lose custody of the kids if
she divorced him.
I was amazed. I warned him. I said unless
she gets the right treatment plan you
are going to see her do something really
crazy. I said it will be something beyond
what you can imagine. It was be devasting
to you and your family.
I kept warning him and eventually my warnings
fell on deaf ears to speak. Meaning he wasn’t
listening and he still didn’t go through
my bipolar disorder suppporter material.
Well yesterday I got a call and his wife:
-Called the police on him
-He was arrested I believe
-Filed a restratining order against him
-Made up many stories of all kinds of things
-He can’t go by his three kids
-She is filing for divorce
My friend says he needs help right away.
NOW MY FRIEND LIVES IN TEXAS SO HE’S FAR AWAY
I can’t just run over and help him. He is devasted
and now wants a quick fix. I haven’t spoken
to him yet, we only traded voicemail.
It’s a real sad story for him.
BIG WARNING
I have a big warning for tens of thousans of people.
Here it is. If you have a loved one with bipolar
disorder and he/she is not undertreatment, it
gets worse with time. If the person doesn’t have
a system to manage the disorder and you donβt
have a system in place to help them it will ramp
up over the weeks, months and years into a super
episode.
The superepisode is so destructive it can destory
the person with bipolar disorder, and everyone around
them. Generally I have found that small episodes
lead to bigger ones and then one big giant one
that’s like the mother of all episodes for the
person.
At this point it takes more than one year to fix
it all IF you even can. With my mom, for many
years she was somewhat stable having mini episodes
and kind of bigger episodes. It wasn’t that bad
all the time. Then eventually she ramped up
into her mother of all episodes which seriously
almost destroyed every person around her including
herself unless I stepped in and did what I did
which is why I am in this field with these
sites.
The sad part is, there are tens of thousands
of people gambling on my list. They really
haven’t done a whole lot about their bipolar
disorder or their loved one’s bipolar disorder.
There is no plan. There is no system for the
person with bipolar disorder or the supporter.
These people are gamblling that the mother
of all episodes will NOT come. But it probably
will.
Just like my friend gambled. Unfortunately like
tons of people, he lost. The episode came. Now
he has a serious problem.
He is facing:
-A record probably
-Losing his kids
-Losing his house
-Losing lots of money
-Get embarrased by all that is happening
-Having serious problems at his job because he is distrated
He asked about his three kids and what he should do in
a message he left me. In my head, I know what he can
do for custody but he is not going to like what I
have to say.
I actually have a getting custody plan I outlined.
It was for someone who got one of my courses,
called and begged me to help him with custody.
First I am NOT a lawyer and I told the guy
that he had to talk to a lawyer. He said and
I quote, “his lawyer sucked and he was losing
the fight.”
I told him that I don’t want to give any advice
that can be misconstrued as legal advice because
I am NOT a lawyer and I might as well add that
I am NOT a doctor, therapist, insurance agent,
professional financial person, etc. I am none
of these.
Anyway, the guy said that he understood that
it wasn’t legal advice and that he wanted to
know how I would handle it.
So I agreed to write up a plan on how I would
handle the situation BUT he had to sign paperwork
that he understood it was not legal advice and he
understood I was not a laywer.
I outlined a plan and he said that my plan made
sense. It involved getting a special kind of lawyer
and many other things. He followed the plan
and actually got custody of his kid. His wife or
exwife is in treatment now as well. So it worked
out.
BUT, this is a serious plan. There’s no kidding
around with my plan. BUT, I doubt my friend would
listen to me. Sadly he will probably lose his three
kids to a person who mistreats her kids and doesn’t
even know it. If you are reading this and have bipolar
disorder and are offended that I am talking about
taking kids away from a mother with bipolar disorder.
Consider this. If a mother is totally out of control
should she have custody of kids? Of course not.
Well I have to get going now. The important
message of this email is to take action. Don’t
believe that you can just wing it with bipolar
disorder and it will all work out and the person
will get better by magic. It won’t work like
that. And if some how smaller episodes work
themselves out, realize bigger ones will come
without a great system.
SUPPORTING AN ADULT?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarsupporter.com/report11
SUPPORTING A CHILD/TEEN?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarparenting.com
HAVE BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.survivebipolar.net
I know there’s tons of people in the same situation.
The same day I got news from my friend,
I had THREE other people have the same
thing happen to them. No there isn’t something in
the air. It’s just that when you have 100,000 people
on your list. There’s a bunch of bad stuff going
on and 2 against 100,000 is a small percentage
anyway. I don’t want anyone to think that there
is something happening this week that is causing
people with bipolar disorder who are not stable
to do this type of thing.
Well I have to take off. Have a great day.
Your Friend,
Dave
P.S. Check out my F.ree blog with copies of emails
that I have sent in the past and lots of great
information for you:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/supporterblog/
P.P.S Check out my F.ree podcast. Hear me give
mini seminars designed to teach you information
you can’t learn anywhere else.
http://bipolarcentral.libsyn.com