Bipolar: I Dare You to Do This

Hi,

Here’s an interesting challenge for you to think about: I dare you to be happy. Yep, just like when we were kids, and somebody dared you to do something. Or double-dared you…I dare you to be happy. You might ask me, “Well, Dave, how can I be happy when I suffer from bipolar disorder or depression?” Well, I still dare you to be happy!

See, happiness is a state of mind – an attitude. It doesn’t depend on whether everything is going
right in your life. It has to do with how you FEEL about your life. Everything doesn’t have to be perfect for you to be happy. You don’t have to have everything going your way for you to be happy. You don’t even have to have everything under control for you to be happy.

And your happiness does not depend on whether you are cured or not. I know a person who has bipolar disorder, and she still has episodes from time to time, but she is still happy. This is because she has a good life, and even though she still has episodes (because she still has a chemical imbalance in her brain), she has learned how to manage her bipolar disorder.

This woman is one of the most positive people you’d ever want to meet. See, this is what I’m talking about. This woman still has bipolar disorder, but she is HAPPY! It’s all about your state of mind (your attitude) towards life and your problems in it.

You can choose to focus on the negative or you can choose to focus on the positive. You can choose to be unhappy or you can choose to be happy. Yes, happiness is a CHOICE. One that YOU can make!

So…I dare you to be happy!

There are things you have control over and things you don’t have control over. Your attitude is one of the things you DO have control over. Regardless of your moods, or the mood swings
that come with bipolar disorder, that is.

And for supporters of loved ones with bipolar disorder, who might suffer with depression, it’s the same thing. You could be depressed from time to time, but you can still be happy. I know, that sounds weird, doesn’t it? But depression is a temporary state of mind – it will pass, if you let it.

But generally speaking, you can be a positive person. You can make a CHOICE to be happy. You can control your attitude, and still be happy with your life, you can still be happy with yourself, you can still be happy with things in general. You can change the things in your life that you have the power to change. This will make you happy.

Or you can accept the things that you cannot change, which will also make you happy. Acceptance is a powerful force in itself. And acceptance can bring happiness.

So, despite bipolar disorder, despite depression, you can still be happy, that’s what I’m saying. So… I dare you to be happy. I double-dare you!

Well, I have to go!

Your Friend,

Dave

 

Current Bipolar News

Hi,

What’s new? Hope you are doing well.

To read this week’s news visit:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/bipolarnews683/

Priority conditions could help pediatric mental health inpatient quality measurement
DO> Important study, don’t you think?

Illness course impacts suicide risk in bipolar and depressive disorder
DO> Interesting study, don’t you agree?

Genes signaling inflammatory stress reactions shared between schizophrenia, bipolar disorder
DO> You’ll find this an interesting comparison.

Psychiatric ‘crisis’ leaves mentally ill in jail, documents say
DO> This story will shock you.

Bidirectional link between life events and mood episodes
DO> Good study, wouldn’t you say?

Adam Boland: Former TV producer reveals mental illness struggle, says he was ‘trapped by …
DO> This man’s story will move you.

First stem cell study of bipolar disorder yields promising results, UM and Prechter Fund scientists say
DO> Fascinating study, don’t you agree?

EEG findings specific to mood state in bipolar disorder
DO> Important information you might like to know.

Staging model, biomarker proposed for bipolar disorder
DO> You’ll find this study very interesting.

For these stories and more, please visit:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/bipolarnews683/

Check out all my resources, programs and information for all aspects of bipolar disorder by visiting:
http://www.bipolarcentralcatalog.com

http://www.bipolarcentralcatalog.com

Your Friend,

Dave

Bipolar: If Life Gives You Lemons…

Hi,

You know, if it were summertime, my goddaughter would be wanting to have a lemonade stand and sell lemonade. Lots of kids like to do that. I don’t think it even matters whether they’re rich or poor, either. I’m not sure it’s even about needing the money, is what I mean. Like, they might want the extra money to buy something special. But mostly I think kids like to put up lemonade stands and sell lemonade just for the fun of it, don’t you think?

Of course, to a lot of kids (like me), making their own money IS fun! LOL Speaking of making lemonade…You’ve probably heard that expression: “If life gives you lemons…make lemonade.”
Well…I think that can apply to bipolar disorder as well, if you think about it.

Because it means that you need to have a positive attitude, and that’s one thing that can be very
important when you’re trying to deal with the ups and downs that come with bipolar disorder.
Your attitude can determine many things. It can even affect your health, did you know that?

It’s true. Even the American Heart Association promotes having a positive attitude. They say that having a positive attitude decreases stress. And since stress is one of the major factors in stroke
and heart attacks, a positive attitude can actually prevent them! So to stay in good health, in other words, have a positive attitude!

Your attitude also affects your emotional well being. If you’re in a negative frame of mind, it won’t even matter if good things happen to you, because you’ll react to them negatively. But the opposite is also true: if you’re in a positive frame of mind, it won’t matter if bad things happen to you, because you’ll react to them positively. And, in that case, you will definitely react to
them with a better frame of mind.

For example: Say you have a major problem that comes against you. Problems sometimes need creative solutions. It can take a process to solve them. And you need to have the wherewithal to be able to do that. If you have a negative attitude, you won’t be able to think of all the possible solutions…Where if you have a positive attitude, you WILL be able to think of all the possible solutions to your problem. Even that crazy, “it’ll-never-work” answer that may be the very solution to your problem, you never know!

But the more positive you are, the more receptive you will be to even consider it. Having a more positive attitude doesn’t just help you to solve problems better, like the major problems that come against you at times (like a major bipolar episode), but it can also help you cope with the smaller day-to-day problems of dealing with a loved one with bipolar disorder. Having a positive attitude is just better for you all around.

Well, I have to go!

Your Friend,

Dave

 

Current Bipolar News

Hi,

What’s new? Hope you are doing well.

To read this week’s news visit:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/bipolarnews682/

New gene for bipolar disorder discovered
DO> Interesting study, don’t you agree?

Innovative study uses pharmacogenomic test to treat patients with psychotic disorders
DO> This will be an important study, don’t you think?

Researchers closer to improving safety, effectiveness of lithium therapy
DO> What this article reveals is scary.

Comprehensive psychosocial interventions plus pharmacotherapy can bring improved symptoms …
DO> These results will be helpful to future studies, wouldn’t you say?

Executive dysfunction in bipolar disorder not solely mood dependent
DO> These results make you think, don’t they?

Compensatory brain mechanisms at play in siblings of bipolar patients
DO> Good information if you are a sibling of someone with bipolar disorder.

Distinct motor activity patterns for bipolar depression and mania
DO> This study reveals something very interesting.

Residual depression has lasting impact on bipolar patients
DO> These findings are important for your loved one.

Bipolar disorder and epilepsy could be linked
DO> This study reveals some surprising results.

For these stories and more, please visit:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/bipolarnews682/

Check out all my resources, programs and information for all aspects of bipolar disorder by visiting:
http://www.bipolarcentralcatalog.com

Your Friend,

Dave

Bipolar: Is It Really a Lie?

Hi,

I have this friend, whose children are grown adults now, with children of their own. But she told me this story about one of them one time. She was trying to teach her children about lying, and about how it was wrong to lie. And one of them said: “Well, Mommy, is it a lie if I tell you it’s a lie?” Well…You kinda have to think about that one.

Children do say the darnedest things sometimes, don’t they? That’s what my friend thought, anyway, when she really didn’t know how to answer her son when he said that!

Well…I was thinking about that story the other day, when I was thinking about one of the biggest problems with bipolar disorder: LYING. It’s a big problem, all right.

Consider this email that I got:

“Dave, I do love my husband, don’t get me wrong. And I know he loves me. And I know he doesn’t really want to hurt me. But he does anyway. You know how? He lies! He lies all the time! I’m afraid he does it on purpose. Or maybe it’s just cause of his bipolar disorder, I don’t know, but that’s what I wanted to ask you about. Do all people with bipolar disorder lie all the time? I mean, he even lies about stuff he doen’t have to lie aobut! Things it’s sure I would find out about, like that he doesn’t do something he should. Like even that he doesn’t go to see his therapist when he should go. I can see that the payment isn’t made, he should know that. But he still tells me that he goes, and that’s an outright lie. Like I wouldn’t find out! What is he thinking? Is everyone with bipolar like this, or is it just him? And what should I do about it? I’m at the end of my rope here. I feel like I’m dealing with a teenager.”

——————————————————————————————————————–

Hmmm…Not as odd an email as you might think. I’ve gotten emails like this before. Like I said, lying is a common problem with bipolar disorder. There are several reasons for this. And some of them came out in this email. For one thing, someone with bipolar disorder may appear to be lying, when it’s really a result of their disorder.

Here’s what I’m talking about: Say they have a manic episode. And they act a certain way during that manic episode, exhibit certain behaviors. Say they even hurt you with these behaviors. And you remember it, because it hurt you.

But after the episode, they don’t remember what they did. And you may think they’re lying. But the fact is, that they really do NOT remember what happened during that episode. In that case, they’re really not lying. It’s just a part of their bipolar disorder.

In fact…It can cause real problems, because they may even think that you’re lying! And before you know it…You’re fighting about it! So in this case…You have to be understanding about it.

But what about the other times? Are they really lying? Like in this email, for example. Say… Lying about going to a therapist appointment when they really didn’t go. Your loved one might do something like that. That really is lying.

So why would they do something like that? Well…They might not want to disappoint you. That could be one reason for it. Or they might lie about taking their medication. They might not take it because they might not like what it does to them. Or they might feel that they don’t need it. So they tell you that they’re taking it, when they’re not.

This lie might be because they don’t want to be told what to do, or simply because they don’t want to take their medication (a specific thing).

So what can you do about it? If you can, you need to talk to them about it. You need to set down consequences for their lying. And then you need to stick to those consequences if they lie again.
So that eventually they will stop lying, because they don’t like the consequences.

Well, I have to go!

Your Friend,

Dave

 

Bipolar: Do You Always Need to Know?

Hi,

Have you ever heard the question asked, “If a tree falls in the forest and there’s no one around to hear it fall, does it still make a sound?” Or what about the question, “When you shut the door on your refrigerator, does the light still stay on?” Do you believe there are people who really worry about the answers to these questions (and others like them)?

Maybe it’s because they’ve got nothing better to do with their time, or maybe because they’ve
got too much time on their hands. Maybe it’s because these types of people always have to know what’s going to happen ahead of time or they feel insecure. Or maybe they just have to know all the answers to everything. These are the types of people who can’t deal with unpredictability.

But as a supporter, you have to live with this (unpredictability) all the time, since bipolar disorder is not a predictable illness. Wait. Let me take that back for a second.

Yes, you can know predictability in two ways:

1. You CAN know the signs and symptoms of the disorder.

2. You CAN know your loved one’s warning signs and triggers.

But you CAN’T predict when a bipolar episode is going to happen. Not even a psychiatrist can
predict that. It’s like a fortune teller predicting the future!

You also have to live with unpredictability (usually a lot of it) when your loved one is in an episode. There’s no way to predict the behavior of a person in a manic episode. Nor is there any way to predict the consequences of that behavior. (Unless, of course, you are familiar with the
behavior, and you are the one who has set down the consequences for the behavior, like if it has
happened before, or something like that.) Otherwise, you just have to deal with the unpredictability of it.

Your loved one may go off on a spending spree. They may exhibit sexually promiscuous behavior. They may go gambling. They may exhibit other impulsive risk-taking behaviors.
They may take the checkbook and/or credit cards and put you into debt. They may make foolish business decisions or ventures. They may do other behaviors that you can’t predict during their episode.

One thing that might help with the problem of unpredictability in your life is to know your loved one’s triggers. Knowing your loved one’s triggers can help you as a supporter to help your loved one avoid a bipolar episode. Then what you can both do is that, after the episode is over is to look at what happened during the episode so that it doesn’t happen again.

Or what you can do during the episode to minimize the consequences afterward. By doing this, you can take some of the unpredictability out of your loved one’s bipolar disorder. This takes good communication skills between the two of you. It also takes a willingness to cooperate and to work at making things better.

If you hold resentments against your loved one (say, for something they did during a manic episode), and you don’t forgive them, you will hold things in, and you won’t talk to them as readily or willingly. The same goes for them. If they don’t feel that they can trust you, for
example, they may hold their thoughts and feelings in, and not share them with you honestly and openly. If this happens, you have a breakdown in communication. Then you’re not fighting on the same team any more.

And there is no chance for being able to cope with the unpredictability of your loved one’s bipolar disorder. You need to be together on this issue.

Well, I have to go!

Your Friend,

Dave

 

Current Bipolar News

 

Hi,

What’s new? Hope you are doing well.

To read this week’s news visit:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/bipolarnews681/

Parents with bipolar disorder feel control by monitoring kids’ moods
DO> Important information for you to know, especially if you are a parent with bipolar.

Inflammation and stress combine in bipolar and schizophrenia subtypes
DO> Interesting study, don’t you agree?

Studies in developmental disorders show men are the weaker sex
DO> This video will interest you.

Pregnant women with bipolar disorder face ‘extra challenges,’ study shows
DO> This study is significant because it “confirms that substance abuse and suicidality are active problems in perinatal women with bipolar disorder.

Bipolar but no need to suffer in silence
DO> Here is one man who is doing something about the need for education and support for bipolar.

AIM subscale scores measure affective intensity in bipolar I, II
DO> Important study, don’t you think?

Compensatory brain mechanisms at play in siblings of bipolar patients
DO> Good information to know if you are a sibling of a bipolar patient, or if you have a child who is a sibling of one.

New gene for bipolar disorder discovered
DO> The scale of this investigation is unparalleled worldwide.

Innovative study uses pharmacogenomic test to treat patients with psychotic disorders
DO> These results make you think, don’t they?

Researchers closer to improving safety, effectiveness of lithium therapy
DO> Some important new information about lithium that you might like to know.

Executive dysfunction in bipolar disorder not solely mood dependent
DO> Important study, don’t you think?

Distinct motor activity patterns for bipolar depression and mania
DO> Interesting study, don’t you agree?

For these stories and more, please visit:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/bipolarnews681/

Check out all my resources, programs and information for all aspects of bipolar disorder by visiting:
http://www.bipolarcentralcatalog.com

Your Friend,

Dave

Bipolar: It’s Not Always Easy to Know

Hi,

Have you ever noticed that sometimes things are black and white? They’re just plain that way. Easy to see the answer. Or the information. Or the subject. Or whatever. But other things are kind of gray…Like “in-between…” Or not so easy to see. Not so easy to tell the answer. Or to discern the information. Or to understand the subject. Or whatever.

Sometimes we can feel downright lost, can’t we? Or even feel like maybe everyone else sees the
answer except us. That can be really frustrating. It’s especially hard for older people, because they’re always saying: “In the old days…” Or, “Back in the day…” Or, “In my time…” Because to them, things were simpler then. They could see things clearer. To them, things are more complicated now.

And to us, well…I guess that’s the way things can seem to us as well sometimes. Especially when we’re dealing with a loved one with bipolar disorder. It’s not always clear what to do. It helps to get advice from people who have been where you are. They can offer you help and advice because they know what you’re going through.

That’s why I advise going to a bipolar support group. Being around people going through the same thing that you are can help sometimes. Maybe you’re struggling with an issue, and someone in the group has struggled with that issue, and they tried something with their loved one and it worked with them. So maybe you can try it with your loved one too, and maybe it will work for you too. That’s how it works.

You not only get support in a support group, but sometimes you get really good advice too. It helps for those times when you’re struggling with something, and you just don’t know what to do. It helps to know someone who’s already been there and gone through it.

Sometimes just bouncing things off a close friend or family member can help as well. That’s why I recommend that you develop your own support system (your loved one should also have
their own). You should have people that you can go to and talk to and tell them how you’re feeling. It helps not to keep things in.

They can also offer more than just encouragement – sometimes they can give some pretty good concrete advice. Maybe even something you didn’t even think of.

Well, I have to go!

Your Friend,

Dave

 

Current Bipolar News

PLEASE FORWARD TO YOUR FRIENDS

Hi,

What’s new? Hope you are doing well.

To read this week’s news visit:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/bipolarnews680/

Residual symptoms linked to poor functioning in euthymic bipolar disorder
DO> Important study, don’t you think?

Further support for hippocampal volume as psychosis biomarker
DO> Interesting study, don’t you agree?

Amherst Man Sentenced on Burglary Conviction in Fluvanna
DO> Do you think this is fair?

BDNF abnormalities may predict bipolar disorder
DO> You’ll find some important information here.

More support for interhemispheric disconnectivity in bipolar disorder
DO> You’ll see an interesting difference between men and women.

Diagnostic errors common among patients with bipolar disorder
DO> Doesn’t this bother you?

Inflammation and stress combine in bipolar and schizophrenia subtypes
DO> This study reveals something very interesting.

Bipolar disorder led Vancouver man to send hoax powder to politicians, comedians, he says
DO> This man’s story will shock you.

For these stories and more, please visit:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/bipolarnews680/

Check out all my resources, programs and information for all aspects of bipolar disorder by visiting:
http://www.bipolarcentralcatalog.com

Your Friend,

Dave

Bipolar: Eating Play-Dough

Hi,

Do you remember Play-Dough? I think it’s even still around today! I remember having a blast playing with it as a kid. There was so much you could do with it! There were so many colors it came in. There were so many different shapes you could make it go into. Especially if you bought the special molds. But even if you didn’t, you could always use Mom’s cookie cutters,
couldn’t you?

The thing is…Some kids could spend hours using their imaginations and making all kinds of things with Play-Dough. Other kids would play with it for a little while and then lose interest and go on to something else. And then there were other kids who would just EAT it! LOL Just kidding…

But what I’m getting at is that different people, if given the same circumstances, will react in different ways. Just like those children, given the same toy. Like everyone with bipolar disorder is different, so the same medication/treatment is not going to work the same for everybody.

So think about how that relates to you, as a supporter. On the one hand, I hope it would be good news to you to find out that you are NOT alone. There are SO many other supporters of a loved one with bipolar disorder out there. I know, because I get emails and letters from thousands of them. So no, you are not alone. And that should be good news.

Because I know that sometimes I felt, when I was dealing with my mom as her supporter, that I was alone in what I was trying to cope with. And when I found out that there were actually
millions of people that had bipolar disorder, it was a revelation to me. I just didn’t know that.
So just knowing that helped.

But it was still hard going through being a supporter to my mom. It’s still hard for you, isn’t it?
The daily ups and downs…The mood swings…The bipolar episodes…The unpredictability…
The financial pressures…The impulsive acts…And maybe just the fact that your loved one
got diagnosed with bipolar disorder turned your life upside down.

I know it has for some supporters. I know in some cases, their loved one makes it really hard for them at work, too. That might be part of the problem for you, as well. But you hang in there, don’t you? In spite of all the problems, you still hang in there. Because you feel like you have no choice.

So you try your best, sometimes just to get through the days. But sometimes you think that maybe your best just isn’t good enough. So maybe you start to compare yourself with other supporters. Maybe you hear about other supporters in your support group and you think they are doing better than you are, so you want to be like them.

But I’m here to tell you…That’s not the right way to think. Mostly because everybody is different, and you don’t know what’s really going on with them. They might be struggling just as much as you are!

They might even be jealous of you! So just keep doing the best that you can, and hopefully
things will eventually get easier for you. Just don’t compare yourself to others, because
everybody is different.

Well, I have to go!

Your Friend,

Dave