Bipolar: No Quick Fixes

Hi,

Remember when you were little, and you would get hurt…like falling down and getting a scrape
on your knee? And your mom would kiss it and put a bandaid on it. It would be like getting an immediate fix to your hurt, wouldn’t it?

Unfortunately, when you grow up, there are very few (if any) immediate fixes to your problems
any more. Your problems are much bigger and more complicated than just scrapes on a knee.
And the answers are much bigger and more complicated than just kisses and bandaids, too. And, for many of us, Mom isn’t around to fix our problems for us, either. Or, if she is, she isn’t able to.

For some things there just isn’t an immediate fix, like when it comes to bipolar disorder. If there were, the psychiatrists and therapists would all be out of business, wouldn’t they? And there would be no need for your loved one to do any changing, because they’d be perfect. Unfortunately, nobody is perfect. Especially someone who has bipolar disorder. Not even a supporter who is dealing with someone with the disorder.

There are no easy answers to the problems you face. This is not an illness that has an immediate fix to it, and the decisions you make have to reflect that. The choices you make today will be reflected in consequences down the line tomorrow, and the next day, and the days and weeks and months after that. We’re all responsible for the decisions and choices that we make.

That’s one thing that your loved one needs to understand. When they hurt you, there are consequences to their actions. They can’t just get away with it. You have feelings that get hurt, and you have reactions to their actions. You have a right to your feelings, too.

You shouldn’t have to walk around on eggshells, afraid to say or do the wrong thing. You shouldn’t be afraid all the time of setting them off, of making them go into a rage. You shouldn’t have to change who you are just to please them. You shouldn’t have to be so concerned about how what you do affects them so that they might take it out on you.

You shouldn’t have to worry that something you do would make them go into a bipolar episode.
And, like I was saying earlier, there is no immediate fix to the problem of bipolar disorder. And many times, that bipolar disorder can cause problems in the relationship, for which there are no quick fixes either. Those things need time and effort to work out.

Just like your loved one is working on managing their bipolar disorder, and you are working on being a good supporter, you both need to work on making the relationship a good, strong one, in spite of your loved one’s bipolar disorder.

So there are some things that will pop up that need to be worked on at the moment, and then there are things that need to be worked on constantly (like communication). But either way, there are no quick fixes.

Well, I have to go!

Your Friend,

Dave

 

Current Bipolar News

Hi,

What’s new? Hope you are doing well.

To read this week’s news visit:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/bipolarnews687/

Depressive traits linked to greater suicide risk in bipolar disorder
DO> Interesting study, don’t you think?

Meta-analysis links signalling pathways to bipolar disorder
DO> Important study, don’t you agree?

Teenager to raise awareness about bipolar disorder through modelling contest
DO> You’ll find this teenager’s story inspiring.

Canadian Bipolar Disorder Study Reinforces Methodology of the Meehl Foundation DBT Program
DO> This study reveals something very interesting.

Bipolar Disorder: Biological Pathways Becoming Clearer
DO> You’ll find this interview to be very interesting.

Criminal Conduct and Mental Illness: Are there Predictable Patterns?
DO> This study has a surprising result, you’ll find.

Bipolar man in hiding after mob attack
DO> This man’s story will astound you.

Depressive features typify bipolar disorder in older patients
DO> Some good information for you to know.

Cognitive deficits stable across bipolar disease course
DO> Good study, wouldn’t you say?

For these stories and more, please visit:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/bipolarnews687/

Check out all my resources, programs and information for all aspects of bipolar disorder by visiting:
http://www.bipolarcentralcatalog.com

Your Friend,

Dave

Bipolar: Have You Ever Known This Type of Person?

Hi,

Let me ask you something: Have you ever known a workaholic? Or even been one yourself? Well, it’s one thing to work hard. That’s commendable. But to work so hard that it gets you stressed out is NOT a good thing. Here’s another question for you: How many people do you know who love their work? Probably no one, right? (or very few people)

As children, we are encouraged to follow our dreams (even though some of them aren’t very
realistic, like becoming the president). We are encouraged by our parents and other people,
like guidance counselors, to use the gifts and talents we have to think of a career that we want to work in.

But too many people actually end up hating their jobs. If you are one of them, I encourage you not to let this keep going on. I know the economy is tight. That’s why so many people are holding onto their jobs, even if they hate them. Or are even working a second job. Or a third one!
But eventually, it will eat away at you, believe me.

I know one woman who hated her job so much that she had an anxiety attack on the way to work every day. That’s no way to live! And definitely no way to take care of yourself.

Many times, I talk about starting a home business as an alternative to working outside the home.
Or consider working only part-time, if you can afford it. But remember back to the beginning of this post. You should be working in a field that supports your gifts and talents. A job that you enjoy. One that makes you feel good about yourself. One that you look forward to going to.

Unfortunately, too many people don’t do that. They just take whatever they can get. I know one man who is a certified car mechanic, but can’t find a job in his field. So he started a home business just fixing cars in his driveway for now. And he does very well for himself, and is basically stress-free, because he is his own boss. Also, he can set his own hours.

He also determines how much money he is going to make. So he is doing what he is trained to do…What he loves to do…The way he wants to do it. Some people are stuck at dead-end jobs –
They can’t go any further up the ladder. Then what do you do?

There are so few jobs out there at this point, because the economy is still so bad (even though we’re told that it’s improving). So many people are even being let go from their jobs. And the competition for the jobs that are out there is fierce.

But not if you start your own business, like the car mechanic I was telling you about. He is very happy doing what he’s doing. Maybe you should consider starting your own home business? Many people with bipolar disorder do it because of the flexibility of it and because it works around their disorder. And because the business can still work even if they get sick.

Well, I have to go!

Your Friend,

Dave

 

Current Bipolar News

Hi,

What’s new? Hope you are doing well.

To read this week’s news visit:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/bipolarnews686/

USA Today Hails Mesa College’s Sarah Farmer, Who Overcame Bipolar Disorder
DO> You’ll find this woman’s story inspiring.

Killer’s hearings to resume in May
DO> What this man did will frighten you.

Nicola Worrall made notes on how to hang herself before suicide
DO> This is such a sad story.

House begins debate on abortion funding bill
DO> This controversy does affect bipolar disorder.

Powerful psychotropic drug used in Canada’s federal prisons
DO> This could be dangerous, don’t you think?

Social worker claims bipolar disorder link to chemical imbalance ‘is a myth’
DO> What do you think about this man’s opinion?

Depressive traits linked to greater suicide risk in bipolar disorder
DO> Interesting study, don’t you agree?

Reduced rheumatoid arthritis risk in schizophrenia linked to underreporting
DO> Important study, don’t you think?

Mom: Boston bomb hoax suspect has bipolar disorder
DO> This video will shock you.

Meta-analysis links signalling pathways to bipolar disorder
DO> This study reveals something very interesting.

For these stories and more, please visit:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/bipolarnews686/

Check out all my resources, programs and information for all aspects of bipolar disorder by visiting:
http://www.bipolarcentralcatalog.com

Your Friend,

Dave

Bipolar: Humor and Bipolar Disorder

Hi,

Do you remember George Burns? Or maybe you heard of him? He was a famous comedian, who died in 1996, just a few weeks after his 100th birthday. Now, you might say that George Burns is
proof of what the experts say about humor: That humor can actually extend your life. Now, I’m not going to dispute whether that is actually true or not, but I can see where it might be true.

Consider this: Stress is one of the things that doctors warn you against. They are constantly telling you to get rid of the stress in your life. Why is that? Because studies have shown that stress decreases people’s life spans? Yes!

How? Because stress leads to more heart attacks and strokes, that’s how. And even if you don’t go along with that idea, you must at least believe that stress decreases the quality of a person’s life. Stress makes you nervous, edgy, irritable, agitated, short-tempered, and can even lead to physical illnesses and maladies, like: insomnia, body aches, headaches, stomach aches/ulcers…
And make you more susceptible to colds and viruses because you tend to not take care of
yourself.

Humor decreases stress. That’s right. Even the Bible says so! It says, “Laughter does good like medicine.” People who laugh live longer than people who don’t laugh. I may not be able to quote you the exact studies, but there have been actual studies into the phenomenon.

Think about it…It has to do with having a positive outlook on life. Negative people tend to have more problems and more stress. They also tend to get sick more. Thus they tend to have a shorter life span. At least that’s what studies show.

So…In spite of your loved one having bipolar disorder…LAUGH MORE! Try not to look at everything so seriously. I know it may be hard sometimes, but it will help to decrease some of the stress in your life.

Need help? Try watching a comedy movie or watching a comedian like George Burns on TV, or reading a funny book. That should make you laugh! Or consider the following funny quotes from people who have bipolar disorder who have learned to laugh at their disorder:

“If you like rollercoasters, you’ll love bipolar disorder!”

“I’m a bipolar bear – cute and cuddly!”

“Bipolar – where Santa Claus’s cousin lives.”

Well, I have to go!

Your Friend,

Dave

Bipolar: How You Look at Things

Hi,

You know, when you’re little, your parents have high hopes for you. In general, parents always have high hopes for their children. Not that they want them to become the astronauts or ballerinas or Presidents that the children themselves want to be, but they do want them to be successful and happy in life. That’s because they love them.

Well, if you have a loved one with bipolar disorder, you naturally want them to be just as successful and happy too. That’s because you love them just as much. But can you love them TOO much? Well, can a parent love their child too much? If you have children, ask yourself this question. Parents are accused of spoiling their children all the time.

I know a man who is a very successful and prominent attorney in Florida. In other words, he is very wealthy. And this man has two daughters. He has raised his two daughters to be what most
people would call spoiled. But if you ever talked to the two young girls (teenagers now), you would find them to be respectful and intelligent young women who had healthy self-esteem and values in life and good goals as well. So, is that spoiled?

Yes, they’ve been to Europe and went to private schools and all, but they also learned to do chores and to respect their parents and other adults. So it’s a matter of how you look at things.
How you learn to look at things.

You learned to look at things one way, while your loved one, because of their bipolar disorder, may have learned to look at things another way. They may have a very negative view on their days because of their past, what they’ve gone through because of their disorder. They may have come to expect more bad than good, in other words.

But for you, things are probably different. You probably have a better outlook on things. The thing is, if you give in to the way your loved one looks at things, you will be spoiling them. It’s better to bring them around to your way of thinking than to let them bring you down into theirs.

You may not have bipolar disorder, so you may not have bipolar depressive episodes, but that
doesn’t mean that you can’t still suffer from depression. Your loved one’s behavior can affect you. It’s all in how you look at things.

If you let your loved one bring you down, you CAN suffer from depression, to be sure. You CAN get discouraged as a bipolar supporter. I know, because I went through it when I was
trying to help my mom.

I also know because I get emails and letters all the time from supporters who have loved ones
with bipolar disorder who say that they are getting depressed and are scared that they are “catching” their loved one’s bipolar disorder. Now, although it’s not true that you can “catch”
your loved one’s bipolar disorder, it is true that frustration and discouragement and feelings like
it CAN lead to depression, even if you don’t have bipolar disorder.

So you need to keep looking at the bright side of things. You need to keep hoping that, as long as your loved one stays on their treatment plan and medication, that they will recover from their bipolar disorder and that things will get better.

Well, I have to go!

Your Friend,

Dave

 

Current Bipolar News

Hi,

What’s new? Hope you are doing well.

To read this week’s news visit:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/bipolarnews685/

Can what you eat affect your mental health?
DO> This study has some surprising results.

Meehl Foundation Offers Complimentary SPECT Image for Bipolar Disorder Treatment
DO> This foundation could really help your loved one.

High relapse rates in bipolar disorder confirmed
DO> Interesting study, don’t you agree?

Brainsway’s Deep TMS System Will be Exclusively Marketed by Medison Pharma in Israel
DO> This device will change the way of treatment for bipolar disorder.

Stress-Related Epigenetic Changes in Blood Mirror Those in Brain
DO> Important study, don’t you think?

Unipolar mania confirmed as distinct subtype of bipolar disorder
DO> This study reveals something very interesting.

For these stories and more, please visit:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/bipolarnews685/

Check out all my resources, programs and information for all aspects of bipolar disorder by visiting:
http://www.bipolarcentralcatalog.com

Your Friend,

Dave

Bipolar: Funny Expression For You

Hi,

I heard a funny expression recently that I wanted to share with you (we just can’t be serious all the time, you know?) It goes: “Today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday.” Isn’t that cute? I thought it was (then again, you might think I’m a little bit crazy lol). But it kind of has to do with what I wanted to talk to you about today.

See…There are some people who are worriers. You know what I’m talking about? Maybe you know someone like that. And these people are going to worry about things no matter what happens. No matter what you say to them. They’re just going to worry, because that’s what they
do. All the time. They’re just worriers. That makes them very negative people.

These type of people get sicker than other people. Did you know that? It’s true. Oh, not just the hypochondriacs who worry that they’re sick (when usually they aren’t, they’re just worried that they are). But people who worry are generally more stressed than people who don’t worry.

But people who don’t worry are less stressed. That’s because they’re generally more positive than the people who worry. But people who worry live in fear. And that’s the bottom line. I don’t want you to live in fear. I mean…Yes, you fight a battle. And bipolar disorder is a very serious thing. It can even be fatal. But if you worry about it, if you live in fear of it, you’ll just worry yourself sick.

Really – you could seriously make yourself sick over it. Because worry can bring stress. And stress has been known to bring illness on people. Stress can even cause heart attacks and strokes.
Yes, stress can be deadly. So you want to be as stress-free as you can. Not just for your loved one, but for yourself as well. Because what good are you going to be to your loved one if you’re no good to yourself?

You can’t take care of them if you’re first not taking care of yourself. I know, I know. I harp on that a lot. I do, because I want you to listen to it. You are a very important person. Not just an important person in your loved one’s life, but a very important person in life itself. And you do need to take care of yourself. You don’t need to worry. And you don’t need to live in fear.

You need to live life the best way I know how: “One Day at a Time.” Just do the best you can, with a positive attitude, one day at a time.

Well, I have to go!

Your Friend,

Dave

 

Bipolar: Getting What You Want

Hi,

Remember when you were younger, and you wanted something so bad you almost couldn’t
stand it? Like at Christmastime, getting that one present you wanted more than anything else.
Then, as you get older, you may have the same strong desire for something, but you can’t always
count on someone else providing it for you.

Some things you just have to do for yourself. When you know what you want, and you want it
badly enough, well, you’ll find a way to get it. That’s what happens when you’re an adult. No more Santa Claus. Just you. And your ability to attain what you desire. First, though, you need to know what you want.

So how does this relate to bipolar disorder? (Because you know I always relate everything to
bipolar disorder somehow, right? Lol) Say you want things to be less stressful at home. Say you want it very badly. Well, no one is going to do the work for you – you first of all have to want it bad enough, and second of all, want it bad enough to do what it takes to attain it.

So you might think of ways to make your home environment more peaceful. You might brainstorm some ideas and then act upon them. You can’t just wait on your loved one to do it for
you, because they may either not see the same need, or acknowledge it, or be willing or able to do it like you can.

I know, that sounds like it’s all on you to do the hard work, but sometimes you have to pick up the slack from your loved one. That is, if it’s something you want bad enough. Again, if you want something bad enough, you’ll do whatever it takes to get it.

If your loved one wants stability bad enough, they will do whatever it takes to attain it. And that may be what you want as well. Although you can’t make your loved one do what they have to do to attain stability, you can do your part.

You can help them remember to take their medications. You can see that they get to all their doctor and therapist appointments. You can make sure that they stay productive, even if that means writing up a To-Do List for them. You can go to your own support group and find out how other supporters are dealing with their loved one’s bipolar disorder.

In other words, if you want something bad enough, you’ll do what it takes to get it. That doesn’t mean, though, that you can’t ask for help. In fact, if you don’t ask for help, you may suffer supporter burnout, trying to do everything yourself.

On the other hand, you don’t want to do for your loved one what they can do for themselves, either. You have every right to expect them to participate in what they can. Like the example I used of keeping a stress-free home environment. They can help with that, too. Or coming up with ideas for items to put on a To-Do List. Or helping with a list of long-term goals that both of you want to achieve.

Well, I have to go!

Your Friend,

Dave

 

Current Bipolar News

Hi,

What’s new? Hope you are doing well.

To read this week’s news visit:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/bipolarnews684/

Bidirectional link between life events and mood episodes
DO> Interesting study, don’t you agree?

EEG findings specific to mood state in bipolar disorder
DO> Important study, don’t you think?

Staging model, biomarker proposed for bipolar disorder
DO> Good study, wouldn’t you say?

Creative inspiration associated with heightened risk of bipolar disorder
DO> Does your loved one highly value this characteristic as well?

Cognitive deficits in bipolar patients ‘not homogenous’
DO> These study results may surprise you.

Social support could improve outcomes for elderly bipolar patients
DO> Good information, especially if you’re dealing with an older loved one.

Excessive alcohol use does not alter course of bipolar mood states
DO> This study reveals something very interesting.

For these stories and more, please visit:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/bipolarnews684/

 

Check out all my resources, programs and information for all aspects of bipolar disorder by visiting:
http://www.bipolarcentralcatalog.com

Your Friend,

Dave