Hi,

How’s it going? Hope you are doing great.

To read this week’s news visit:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/bipolarnews471/

Here are the news headlines:

Prosecutors: Woman embezzled to fund makeup habit
DO> This is really sad. Terrible.

Berkeley woman overcomes major obstacles to graduate from Yale
DO> Wow, what do you think of this?

Matters of perception
DO> Very interesting article, don’t you think?

Can Alexander McQueen’s Suicide Help Prevent Others From Ending Their Lives?
DO> What do you think of this.

Bipolar study looks at light therapy
DO> This should be studied hard, don’t you think?

For these stories and more, please visit:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/bipolarnews471/

==>Help with ALL aspects of bipolar disorder<<==

Check out all my resources, programs and information for all aspects of bipolar disorder by visiting:
http://www.bipolarcentralcatalog.com

Your Friend,

Dave

Hi, how are you doing today? I hope you’re having a great day.

You know I talk a lot about being in control of your bipolar disorder. That’s because if you don’t,

the bipolar disorder will be in control of you. So how do you take control? By doing the things you need to do to be stable.

Although you are not the only one with bipolar disorder, you are the only one who can take care of your own disorder. It’s different for different people.

But there are some things that people with bipolar disorder should have in common:

1. Take your medication. If there are any problems with your medication, you
need to report it to your doctor so they can help you.

2. Eat a healthy diet. There are some foods that are bad for people in general,
much less people who have bipolar disorder. For example, caffeine (even in chocolate)
can be bad for you.

3. Live a healthy lifestyle. You can’t smoke, drink, and/or take drugs if you
want to get better. Even nicotine can possibly affect your stability. And
substance abuse is a problem in itself (and can also have bad consequences
for your bipolar medication).

4. Stick to a good sleep schedule. You should get at least 8 hours of uninterrupted
sleep every night, and go to bed at the same time and rise at the same time every
day.Your body clock needs to be stable in order for you to be stable.

5. Go to all your appointments. Not everyone with bipolar disorder is on the same
treatment plan, but each should have at least a doctor and therapist. You may
have a psychiatrist as well, who manages your bipolar medications. Missing
appointments can become a very bad habit, and hurt you in the long run.

6. Have a strong support system. Not everyone has the same people in their
support system, as each person decides for themselves, but they should all
have a support system. You could have your supporter, friends, family,
co-workers, your clergy person, your pharmacist, and others to help you.

In addition to these common things, there are other things that some people
with bipolar disorder do to maintain control over the disorder.

1. Keep a mood chart or diary. Recording your moods on a daily basis can be
very beneficial for you if you have bipolar disorder. You can see at a glance any
patterns, such as a prolonged depression, that can indicate that you might be
going into an episode, and you can avoid it.

2. Have a good social life. You don’t need to hide just because you have bipolar
disorder. And you shouldn’t be alone a lot of the time, because isolation is one
of the biggest triggers to a bipolar episode. Having friends and a “normal” social
life is good for your self-esteem as well.

3. Stay close to family. Many people with bipolar disorder shy away from their
family, or have offended them when they were in an episode. It’s important to
maintain these relationships, so they can be there for you.

4. Be productive. You may no longer work outside the house, you may even
be on disability, but that doesn’t mean that you can’t be productive with your
time. Some people with bipolar disorder start their own home business, while
others volunteer their time to a worthy cause. Being idle and/or bored can lead
to a bipolar episode.

So who is in control? If you do these things, chances are that YOU will be in control of your bipolar disorder. If you aren’t doing these things, or not doing them consistently, your stability is in jeopardy, as your bipolar disorder has control over you.

Well, I have to go!

Your Friend,

Dave

Hi, how are you? I hope you’re doing good.

You’ve heard the expression, “No pain, no gain,” haven’t you? Well, I work out a lot, so it’s a real familiar saying around the gyms. I wanted to talk to you today about that. About how everything has a cost. Especially your loved one’s bipolar disorder. Stability is NOT going to

come easy for them. You will both have to go through some pain.

Like when they have episodes. If you’ve been with your loved one during a depressive episode, then you know they are in emotional pain at that time. And you may feel helpless or frustrated by it, because there doesn’t seem to be anything you can do to help them.

But just being a good supporter to them at those times might be all you can do. Be there for them. Listen when they want to talk. Be loving and supportive. Eventually, they will come out

of the episode. And you will have gained something.

In looking back at the episode, you can both determine what caused it, and avoid that in the future. That’s called a “trigger” – something that makes your loved one go into a bipolar episode.

The more familiar you are with your loved one’s triggers, the more you can avoid them, and your loved one will have less episodes. Your loved one will go through a lot before they reach stability.

What if they go into a manic episode? There is definitely some pain with that. Because it’s usually the manic episode that will have consequences to it. And some of these can cause mental or emotional pain. Like, for instance, if your loved one went on a spending spree while in a manic episode, your pain will be in the area of finances. You may hurt financially for a while before you get things straightened out.

But again, like with a bipolar depressive episode, you can learn from a manic episode as well. You can gain from the pain. Each episode should teach you something. If nothing else, you should be learning what your loved one’s triggers to a manic episode are. And you can learn how to avoid them. You should be learning about what leads to stability for your loved one.

Well, I have to go!

Your Friend,

Dave

Hi, how are you doing today? I hope you’re having a great day.

Do you know who Bill Cosby is? Well, he has a video where he talks about his children, and it’s hilarious! He does this bit where he says he catches his son with a cookie and tells him that he has to put it back, that he can’t have it right then.

Then a few minutes later, he hears the rustling of the cookie bag. So he catches his child in the

middle of getting another cookie. And he says, “Didn’t I tell you that you can’t have a cookie?”

And the kid says, “Uh huh.”

And Cosby says, “Then why are you getting a cookie?”

And the kid says, “I don’t know.”

So he’s told to put it back, and he does. But a few minutes later, Cosby hears the cookie bag rustling again, and catches his child in the act a second time. But this time, when he catches

him and asks why he took the cookie, he says, “I was getting one for you.” LOL

But wait – there’s more: Cosby says, “But I don’t want a cookie.” And his child says, “Then can I have it?” It was so funny! All he did was spin his wheels. And got nowhere.

That’s what I want to talk about today – spinning your wheels. And how it relates to bipolar

disorder.

Even though it was a light-hearted way to look at it, this was an illustration that can be applied to your loved one. You know, sometimes they really do not have an answer for you. They don’t know why they act the way they do or do the things they do, or even say the things they say.

I’m not saying not to hold them responsible for the things they say and do, but keep in mind that sometimes they won’t know. Many people with bipolar disorder, when they have an episode, get a type of amnesia afterwards. In other words, you may think they’re lying because they don’t

remember doing something that you remember vividly. But they truly may not remember. Not everyone who has bipolar episodes necessarily remembers what happens during them.

And if your loved one is someone who doesn’t remember, you’ll just be spinning your wheels trying to get them to talk about something they really can’t remember.

Now, that’s not to say that they shouldn’t still be responsible for the consequences of their episodes, whether they remember the behavior or not, because they should. But if you find yourself up against a firewall with them, it’s better to just drop it rather than just keep spinning your wheels and getting nowhere.

Like fighting with your loved one when they are agitated and in a manic episode. There’s no way you’re going to win that fight. So why try? You’ll just be spinning your wheels.

You’re better off putting your efforts somewhere else where they will have better use.

Well, I have to go!

Your Friend,

Dave

=>PLEASE FORWARD TO FRIENDS, FAMILY AND LOVED ONES <=

Hi,

I hope you’re doing ok. Today I want to talk to you about this email I got:

“Dear Dave: My husband has bipolar disorder, and usually he does ok, it’s just that it’s been a while, and I thought that by now he’d be doing much better than he is, ya know?

I mean, he’s been on his medication, and he’s been taking it right and everything, but he is still having episodes once in a while. They’re not as often as they were before, and they’re not as bad, but I thought that once he got on the right medication that he’d be ok.

Why is he still having episodes?”

Wow! I know where this lady is coming from, because you wouldn’t believe how many emails I get that say the very same thing. It’s a tough question to answer, and I’m not a psychiatrist or therapist, so I can only give my opinion – I have no professional standing – just my experience and the experience of thousands of people who have written or talked to me.

There are a lot of supporters (and just as many survivors) who think that once their loved one is on the right medication, that that’s all there is to it! They believe that that their loved one will never go into an episode again. Maybe you think that way, too. So I want you to know how wrong that thinking is. It is unrealistic to think that way.

Yes, medication is the core ingredient to getting better with bipolar disorder. But it’s not a cure for it.

No one should be telling you that your loved one will never have another episode, because that is just not true. No doctor should tell you that, and no therapist either. And you should not assume that, because it just isn’t true.

I teach about the core ingredients necessary for stability, and yes, medication is one of them, but it isn’t a magic cure to never have another episode ever again.

No matter how compliant your loved one is with their medication, no matter how well they follow their treatment plan, no matter how many years they have gone without an episode, you still have to keep up your guard, because they can still have an episode at any time – it’s just the nature of the disorder.

You can’t expect perfection from your loved one, any more than you would want them to expect perfection from you. All that they (and you) can do is your best. Remember: “Hope for the best, while being prepared for the worst,” like I preach all the time.

Because bipolar disorder is a chemical imbalance in the brain, there is no way of knowing when those chemicals are going to “flare up.” Even if your loved one has been stable for a long time, it can still happen. I know a woman who didn’t have an episode for TWELVE YEARS, and then had one that lasted for SIX MONTHS!

Usually, your loved one can control their disorder by being compliant to medication and therapy. But you still have to remember that your loved one has a brain disorder, and that sometimes, it is going to flare up, no matter how long you’ve been stable.

Remember to watch for triggers, and don’t let your guard down as far as watching for signs and symptoms, again, no matter how long your loved one has been stable. I know, it’s easy to become complacent when things have gone on so well for so long. But you can never forget.

Now, I’m not saying to stand over your loved one like a general or anything like that to watch them for triggers, signs and symptoms, but you should be able to tell in general if/when it happens. Just don’t let down your guard is all I’m saying.

If you know that your loved one is in a particularly stressful situation at work, well, you know that stress is one of the biggest stressors to a bipolar episode, so you would just watch them more closely. If their anxiety and/or stress levels are increased, that’s the time to be more vigilant. Also, watch their sleep patterns.

If they are sleeping less, be watchful, because loss of sleep can indicate a bipolar manic episode.

And just the opposite is true, too. If they are sleeping more, be watchful, because sleeping too much can be an indication of a bipolar depressive episode.

The point is, medications are not a cure for bipolar disorder. They are only there to control the symptoms of it, but they are not a guarantee that your loved one will never have another episode.

Well, I have to go!

Your Friend,

Dave

Hi, how’s your day going? I hope it is a good one.

My grandmother always used to tell me these old phrases that never made sense to me when I was younger. Now, looking back, they are starting to make more sense.

“A watched pot never boils” means you should have patience. “Don’t look a gift horse in the mouth” tells you to appreciate the gifts that are given to you. “Don’t count your chickens before they hatch” helps you to not rely on things that aren’t certain yet.

Do you have someone like my grandmother who is always quoting old sayings to you? These quotes can be a helpful source of good advice when followed.

I was always told to “Count my blessings.” This can be a good thing, especially when dealing with an illness that often makes you think of the negative side of things.

When your loved one makes any kind of progress it can be a great time to count your blessings. This is especially true when they manage to gain stability for a period of time.

One thing you may want to do is celebrate the progress made, and encourage your loved one to keep up the good work. There are many ways you can do this, but you may want to make sure that you don’t celebrate in a way that sets off one of their triggers.

Once they have gained stability for a period of time, they may be able to start participating in certain activities that were difficult before, such as work. Remember that they still need encouragement and support, even after they have been stable for some time. The support will help them to maintain their stability better then they would have been able to on their own.

But there’s another important phrase to remember: “Don’t place all your eggs in one basket.”

Many times a person with bipolar disorder will have a relapse of symptoms, even after they have been stable for some time. It is great when they are able to stabilize their life out for some time and get to the point that they can do things they weren’t able to before. It is important, however, to remember that it may not last forever.

Having a backup plan may or may not be appropriate, but it is always a good thing to remember that good things don’t always last as long as we would like. It is also important to remember that if they do relapse, they are still able to gain back stability again with the proper treatment and support.

There are always second chances. And third … and fourth … You get the idea.

When your loved one has gained stability for any amount of time, it is crucial to help them by watching for signs of a relapse or a return of symptoms. Now of course I’m not talking about constant worry. That would be unnecessary, and would just interfere with your own life. But at least to a certain extent, it is important to keep track of whether your loved one is having symptoms.

Encourage them to continue their treatment plan, even if it doesn’t seem like they need it anymore. You may need to explain that the reason it seems they don’t need it anymore is because of how well it is working.

Any time they can experience without symptoms is a blessing, and is something to celebrate. Remember though: don’t put all your eggs in one basket. If the basket should fail, you don’t want all the eggs, or should I say progress, to be lost in the process.

What do you think can be done for your loved one to make sure they have something to fall back on in case they start having symptoms again? What can you do to prepare for that now?

Well, I have to go!

Your Friend,

Dave

Hi, how’s it going? I hope you’re having a good day.

I’m sure you’ve heard the expression “Anything worth doing is worth doing well.”

It wasn’t easy in school for most people. We had to try hard to make a good grade. Relationships aren’t easy, either. In relationships, we have to try hard to make them work. Getting a job and working it is hard work. At a job interview we have to try hard to make a good impression, and if we get that job, we have to work hard at it.

For many of us (who didn’t get a car from mom and dad on graduation), getting that first car was hard work. Many of us worked hard to save up the money for our first car. Then we had to work hard to keep gas in it! (Which isn’t much different than today)

It’s the same in life. We work hard in life. We work hard to be a spouse. We work hard to be a parent. We work hard to be a good employee. And if you’re a supporter to a loved one with bipolar disorder, then you work hard to be a good supporter.

There’s also the expression, “Nothing comes easy in life.” And I agree with that, except that I would add…”…but it’s worth it in the end.”

Your loved one’s stability is worth what you/they have to go through in order to get it. The point is, that stability can be accomplished. I have many success stories to prove it.

Someone might have a bad day at work and ask, “Is this worth working for?” Or someone might see something they want (like a new car), or something they want to do (like a cruise), and they have to ask themselves, “Is this worth working for?”

Well, you need to ask yourself the same thing: “Is my loved one’s stability worth working for?” And I think you will answer, “Yes, it is.”

Now, that’s not to say it will be easy, because it won’t. Bipolar disorder is a very serious illness, and stability with it does not come easily. It takes time. Too many people get impatient with their loved one’s progress and give up too soon. There will be relapses, too. But you just have to expect them as part of the process of recovery.

As far as you’re concerned, just being a good supporter is hard work, isn’t it? Sometimes you may have to deal with things you don’t like. Your loved one may have a bad day, and you have to be patient and also not jump to the conclusion that they are going into an episode.

It’s just one of the things you have to work through. Your loved one will eventually get stabilized on their medications, and that will take time, too, so you need to be patient with that as well. Just remember that with time will come stability, and that it is worth working for.

Well, I have to go!

Your Friend,

Dave

Hi, how’s your day going? I hope it is a good one.

I was talking to my cousins yesterday, and a topic that I didn’t expect came up.

She began talking about how much she loved her sister’s hair. Apparently, it could curl or straighten easily, depending on what she wanted that day. This all was beyond me, but I did pick up something from the conversation: my cousin was unsatisfied by her own hair.

I asked her, if she could change her hair, would she? For that question, I got a very sure “yes!”

It made me think, most of us have something in life that we would like to change. For some of us, it is as simple as the ease that our hair is styled. For others of us, it might be as serious as wanting our loved one to be cured from bipolar disorder.

Unfortunately, we can’t always have what we want. We can’t always control what life has dealt us. What we can control is how we handle it.

If we choose to let it get to us, we can end up depressed or bitter. That’s not something we want, and its not something that will help us or our loved ones. It is better to focus instead on how we can respond to the situation that we find ourselves in.

Have you ever stopped to think what all you can possibly learn from your loved one having bipolar disorder? It may be hard to think that something good could come out of the situation, but both you and your loved one can learn from the situation at hand.

You can learn strategies for handling difficult situations. You can learn perseverance through hard times, and strength even when you doubt. You can learn to accept help, and to know when to listen to other people’s advice. You can learn to see things from a different point of view. If you really work at it, you can even learn patience.

There are many other things you can learn along the way, and some of them you may already know. Some things we learn and don’t even realize that we’ve learned them until someone else notices that we’ve changed for the better.

After all we can learn from being the supporter to someone who has bipolar disorder, there becomes a benefit from being willing to support our loved ones.

No matter how hard times may get, and no matter how much we may wish that it weren’t this way, we can choose to focus on the positive things, and learn from the situation we are in.

What have you learned from supporting your loved one?

Well, I have to go!

Your Friend,

Dave

Hi,

How’s it going?

I am really sorry that this came out really late. We had a glitch in our system.

Anyway, to read this week’s news visit:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/bipolarnews469/

Here are the news headlines:

Preschool Children of Bipolar Parents Have Eight-fold Increase in Risk for ADHD
DO> Did you think it was this high?

In Schizophrenia and Bipolar Disorder, Life Is Not Black and White
DO> Great article, don’t you think?

Bipolar disorder: Brilliance at a Steep Price
DO> What do you think of this?

Children Labeled ‘Bipolar’ May Get a New Diagnosis
DO> Do you agree or disagree with this?

Researchers Focus on Mood Disorders
DO> Hopefully this leads to better treatments.

Volunteers Offer Homeless Vets Support, Resources
DO> Great inspirational story.

For these stories and more, please visit:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/bipolarnews469/

==>Help with ALL aspects of bipolar disorder<<==

Check out all my resources, programs and information for all aspects of bipolar disorder by visiting:
http://www.bipolarcentralcatalog.com

Your Friend,

Dave