Hi,

How’s it going today?

I hope you’re doing well.

I was kind of annoyed yesterday, I someone call and email that my daily emails didn’t give enough information.

The reason why it’s annoying is because I was like, “how much information do you want me to type of up EVERY DAY?”

They were like, “a lot more you are just teasing us?”

The reason why it’s annoying to me is because this takes a MASSIVE amount of work.

A TON.

Many people on my list realize this. Many do not. They simply complain. It’s like the same thing where I volunteer. There are people who constantly complain that someone or some or organization is not doing enough for them.

It’s amazing.

I can’t even imagine if I had to spend more than the time it takes for me to already write these emails every day.

It would be all I did, which doesn’t make any sense.

Know what I mean?

I mean think about it, I am doing this 365 days a year including my birthday, holidays, when I am sick, etc.

For YEARS.

Sorry to vent : )

It’s also annoying that if someone orders something from me and let’s say the post office loses it they assume I did it on purpose.

Or if a package is damaged. Or if something is done.

It just makes me shake my head and realize why it’s so hard in the mental health field. People can be super demanding.

Someone wrote me that I have “no integrity?”

When people say that kind of stuff, it’s beyond annoying based on what I am doing on a daily basis for the cause.

I do a TON and I mean a TON of work. Most of the time I don’t make a dime. You would be shocked if I laid it all out for you. The people who work for me know this for sure.

Anyway, based on the last day or so I was thinking about something.

Remember what is commonly called the Lord’s Prayer?

“God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, The courage to change the things I can, And the wisdom to know the difference.”

Well, today I want to talk about the “accept the things I cannot change” part.

That’s important when it comes to bipolar disorder.

It’s trying to change the things you CAN’T change that leads to stress and anxiety, and that’s what’s bad for your disorder.

Stress leads to depression, and depression can lead to an episode.

And avoiding episodes are what my courses/systems are all about:

NEWLEARN THE SECRETS OF THE MOST SUCCESSFUL WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
http://www.bipolarsupporter.com/bipolarmastersystem/

SUPPORTING AN ADULT WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarsupporter.com/report11

SUPPORTING A CHILD/TEEN WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarparenting.com

HAVE BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.survivebipolar.net

There are some things you CAN change, but there are other things you CAN’T change.

You can’t change other people. It’s up to them to change themselves. And that’s only if they want to – you can’t do it for them.

You can’t always change the situation around you (although sometimes you can, and I’ll talk about that in a minute).

You can’t change the world, as much as you might like to sometimes.

You can’t change the place you’re in, usually.

Especially in this economy. Most of us are lucky to be holding on to our homes these days, and couldn’t afford another house even if we wanted to.

You can’t change things. Things just are the way they are.

For example, you just can’t change the fact that you or your loved one has bipolar disorder. It’s just a fact. You may not like it, but you also can’t change it.

The only thing you can do about things you can’t change is to accept them.

A friend of mine told me this quote from one of her daily readings, and I think it applies here:

“Acceptance is the answer to all my problems today. When I am disturbed, it is because I find some person, place, thing, or situation – some fact of my life – unacceptable to me, and I can find no serenity until I accept that person, place, thing, or situation as being exactly the way it is supposed to be at this moment.”

I think that’s what it’s all about.

Finding serenity, or peace of mind, in whatever situation you’re in.

In other words, accepting what you can’t change.

If you can come to the place where you can accept that you or your loved one has bipolar disorder and you can’t change that fact, then you can do something about it -You can start learning how to manage it.

Remember the old expression, “If life gives you lemons, make lemonade?”

Well, this is sort of the same thing.

You can work with what you have, if you accept it.

If you don’t, it won’t get you anywhere, anyway.

And it might make you sicker, trying to change what you can’t change, getting all stressed out and, like I said, getting stressed out can lead to depression, and depression can lead to a bipolar episode.

And that is something you DON’T want!

For supporters, the same thing can happen.

Maybe you won’t go into an episode, but the stress can make you not as good a supporter as you can be, if you don’t accept the things you can’t change.

The main point I’m trying to make is to accept the things you can’t change, and work with the things you CAN change, and you’ll be much more able to manage your bipolar disorder, or be a better supporter.

Know what I mean? I guess there’s always going to be people who complain on my list no matter what. I can’t change them.

FIND OUT WHAT PEOPLE ARE SAYING ABOUT ME
Visit: http://www.bipolarcentral.com/testimonials

David Oliver is the author of the shocking guide “Bipolar Disorder—The REAL Silent Killer.” Click Here to get FREE Information sent via email on how and why bipolar disorder kills.

Hi,

The other day I sent out a notice about a resource I have titled:

“7 Secrets To Supporting A Child Or Adolescent With Bipolar Disorder.”

It’s located at:
http://www.bipolarsupporter.com/specialoffer/7secretschild/

I have been asked by several people saying, “David, what’s the difference between bipolar disorder in adults and in children?” I have seen this so many times, I have to correct the rumor that started somewhere that they are both the same.

The truth is, that bipolar disorder in adults and bipolar disorder in children is NOT the same!

They even have a name for bipolar disorder in children – it’s called pediatric bipolar disorder, or early-onset bipolar disorder.

The only thing the same is that children are still being diagnosed by the adult criteria in the book used by psychiatrists to diagnose patients, but that’s just because they haven’t caught up yet.

Many doctors and psychiatrists still don’t believe that there’s a difference.

But any parent trying to support a child or teenager with bipolar disorder will tell you that there’s a BIG difference!

For one thing, some of the symptoms are different.

For example, rather than go out on elaborate spending sprees, they are more likely to do things like attention getting behaviors.

Another thing is that there is a rumor that a child might outgrow their pediatric bipolar disorder when they reach adolescence, and that is NOT true, either!

Or that a teenager will outgrow their bipolar disorder when they become an adult, and that is NOT true, either!

I think it would be great if these things were true, but I think you need to know the TRUTH about bipolar disorder and children and adolescence.

And about how to support them.

That’s why I’ve written a whole report about it.

For more information on:

“7 Secrets To Supporting A Child Or Adolescent With Bipolar Disorder”

Please visit:
http://www.bipolarsupporter.com/specialoffer/7secretschild/

David Oliver is the author of the shocking guide “Bipolar Disorder—The REAL Silent Killer.” Click Here to get FREE Information sent via email on how and why bipolar disorder kills.

Hi,

How are you?

I hope you are doing well.

Here is today’s news.

To read this week’s news visit:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/bipolarnews419

Domenici Announces Mental Health Breakthrough

DO> Hmm. What do you think of this?

Duluth Doctor Suspended

DO> Do you agree with this?

Talk Set on Teen Depression

DO> This is important, don’t you think?

Center Offers Online Mental Health Checkup

DO> Great for society.

Shock Resignation Highlights Struggle Against Mental Illness

DO> Wow, what do you think of this?

Specialized Cognitive Behavioral Treatment Available for People with PTSD and Serious Mental Illness

DO> This is great and important.

For these stories and more, please visit:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/bipolarnews419

POST RESPONSES TO THE NEWS HERE

==>Help with ALL aspects of bipolar disorder<<==

Check out all my resources, programs and information for all aspects of bipolar disorder by visiting:

http://www.bipolarcentral.com/catalog.asp

David Oliver is the author of the shocking guide “Bipolar Disorder—The REAL Silent Killer.” Click Here to get FREE Information sent via email on how and why bipolar disorder kills.

Hi,

How are you doing?

I hope you are doing well.

Yesterday I did a few f.ree consultation calls I have with people who have bipolar question certificates.

These are the f.ree consultation certificates for those who get my bipolar supporter main courses below. This is for NON medical and/or NON legal questions.

Remember I am not a doctor, lawyer or therapist and I am not offering any medical or legal advice.

Someone asked me the other day if I was a doctor and I want to be really clear that I am not.

Okay, let’s jump into today’s topic which I talked with someone yesterday about.

Anyway, I heard an expression the other day that I thought was really neat:

“Problems are just solutions in work clothes.”

I mean, everybody has problems, right?

Whether you have bipolar disorder or not, or whether you’re a supporter to someone who has the disorder or not. Everybody has problems.

But you know how some people seem to be able to handle their problems better than other people do?

Well, that’s why I like this expression so much.

To me it’s having a positive attitude towards solving your problems.

And for people with bipolar disorder, that’s important.

I teach in my courses/systems that being positive is very important in the management of your bipolar disorder:

NEW LEARN THE SECRETS OF THE MOST SUCCESSFUL WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
http://www.bipolarsupporter.com/bipolarmastersystem/

SUPPORTING AN ADULT WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarsupporter.com/report11

SUPPORTING A CHILD/TEEN WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarparenting.com

HAVE BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.survivebipolar.net
But let’s talk about that expression:

“Problems are just solutions in work clothes.”

Let’s compare solving problems to working a garden.

In your garden, you might have the most beautiful flowers in the world, right?

But they wouldn’t come without a lot of hard work, did they?

You would have to clear away a lot of weeds to get to the beauty of those flowers, wouldn’t you?

Well, what if you let the weeds and pests overwhelm you and depress you and make you give up?

You wouldn’t have that beautiful garden, now, would you?

See, problems are like that.

Some are easy to solve.

But others are harder to solve.

The solutions are, like the saying says, “in work clothes.”

You have to work at them, like the person in the garden.

The solution is going to be a little harder to find. But it’s there somewhere!

You just have to get all the weeds and pests out of the way first so you can see clear to the answer to your problem, and you’ll have “beautiful flowers” (the solution)!

You just can’t give up too soon.

You have to work hard at it.

You have to try something, and if that doesn’t work, you have to be willing to try something else.

Then, eventually, you WILL find the right solution to your problems!

I’m not saying it’s easy.

No problem is easy to solve. Otherwise it wouldn’t be called a problem, right?

I’m just saying it CAN be done.

Do you agree with me?

FIND OUT WHAT PEOPLE ARE SAYING ABOUT ME

Visit: http://www.bipolarcentral.com/testimonials

David Oliver is the author of the shocking guide “Bipolar Disorder—The REAL Silent Killer.” Click Here to get FREE Information sent via email on how and why bipolar disorder kills.

Hi,

I hope you’re doing ok.

I heard this thing that Norma Bombeck once said, that normal is just a setting on your
dryer.

And I thought that was funny.

Because a lot of people write to me or talk to me about how they don’t feel normal or think they are normal anymore just because they’ve got bipolar disorder now.

Or their supporters write to me or talk to me and say that their lives aren’t normal anymore because their loved one has bipolar disorder now.

And I thought about what Norma Bombeck said.

What is normal, anyway?

I think it’s whatever is normal for you.

Or maybe you had a “normal” before, but now you just have a different “normal.”

Does that make sense?

I have a friend who goes to Alcoholics Anonymous, and she says they have a saying that talks about “living life on life’s terms.”

I have another friend who says “you have to play the hand that you’re dealt.”

I think what they mean is that no, you didn’t ask to have bipolar disorder, or to have a loved one with the disorder – and yes, your lives have certainly changed because of it…

But that doesn’t mean your lives have to be worse.

Your life is whatever you make it – whatever “normal” is for you.

In my courses/systems, I don’t talk in terms of normal or abnormal. I talk in terms of stability. And I think that’s what you should be concentrating on more.

NEW LEARN THE SECRETS OF THE MOST SUCCESSFUL WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
http://www.bipolarsupporter.com/bipolarmastersystem/

SUPPORTING AN ADULT WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarsupporter.com/report11

SUPPORTING A CHILD/TEEN WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarparenting.com

HAVE BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.survivebipolar.net

And I don’t think you should be comparing yourself to other people, either.

I’ve seen that happen at some of the support groups I volunteer at, and it’s pretty sad, because it makes some people feel better while making other people feel worse.

I’m sorry if that sounds mean, but I’ve seen it happen too many times.

The ones who are doing really well kind of look down on the ones who aren’t, the ones who are still struggling.

And the ones who are still struggling compare themselves to the ones who are doing really well and wonder if there’s something wrong with them, because they aren’t doing as good.

That’s what I mean by what is normal, anyway?

Are you NOT normal if you’re not doing as good as someone else with their bipolar disorder?

And if you’re a supporter, are you not normal if you’re not handling your loved one’s bipolar disorder as good as the next person?

NO!

You’re doing the best you can for YOU!

And THAT is NORMAL for YOU!

Every person has their own normal.

Please don’t compare yourself to anyone else.

The only people you should be concerned about are yourselves.

FIND OUT WHAT PEOPLE ARE SAYING ABOUT ME
Visit: http://www.bipolarcentral.com/testimonials

David Oliver is the author of the shocking guide “Bipolar Disorder—The REAL Silent Killer.” Click Here to get FREE Information sent via email on how and why bipolar disorder kills.

Hi,

How’s it going?

People always ask me if I read my bipolar blog.

Yes I do. I read EVERY single message : )

I got this message the other day:

JUDITH says:

“BIPOLAR PEOPLE NEED ALOT OF LOVE AND UNDERSTANDING. BOUNDARIES, BORDERS, ECT. LOVE IS THE MOST IMPORTANT…FOR IT TRULY IS SUFFERING. THINGS LEARNED IN KINDEGARDEN …. SHOULD BE APPLICABLE FOR ANYONE BIPOLAR OR NOT.”

Is love really the most important?

I don’t think so.

It is important, but it’s not the only important thing.

I believe more in what Judith says about how people with bipolar disorder need understanding, boundaries and borders.

Yes, of course, they need love, too, but I think these other things are more important to their stability.

That’s what I teach in my courses/systems:

SUPPORTING AN ADULT WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarsupporter.com/report11

SUPPORTING A CHILD/TEEN WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarparenting.com

HAVE BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.survivebipolar.net

It’s just assumed that as a supporter of a loved one with bipolar disorder that you love them, or you wouldn’t be with them.

But is that THE most important thing?

Is love alone going to keep them stable?

Or even love and understanding combined?

I don’t think so.

I think you need systems, boundaries, and
borders.

I think it’s those things that will help you to support your loved one better.

If you take the time (when your loved one is not in an episode) to sit down with your loved one and establish  some boundaries, and then the consequences of breaking those boundaries, then you have developed part of a system.

This will help you more than just love when they are in an episode.

If you have a system in place for what to do when your loved one is in a bipolar episode, then that is more important than just love.

Now, again, I’m NOT saying that love isn’t important. It is. It’s just not the MOST important thing.

You need to have everyday systems in place to be a good supporter.

You need to have systems in place that will help your loved one to achieve stability.

You need to have systems in place that will help your loved one to maintain that stability.

What about you?

Do you agree with me or not?

FIND OUT WHAT PEOPLE ARE SAYING ABOUT ME
Visit: http://www.bipolarcentral.com/testimonials

David Oliver is the author of the shocking guide “Bipolar Disorder—The REAL Silent Killer.” Click Here to get FREE Information sent via email on how and why bipolar disorder kills.

Hi,

How’s it going?

Hey, a bunch of people are calling and asking me about a particular person who seems to be attacking me on my bipolar blog.

I don’t think the person is attacking me just stating his position. I completely disagree with his position but I believe in free speech.

Anyway thanks for looking out for me if you are worried.

The thing is, everyone doesn’t have to agree with me and I highly encourage you to take what I say and think about it. Talk about it. Don’t just agree all the time.

When I say stuff, I have thought about it long and hard myself.

Anyway, just wanted to let you know.

I want to tell you a funny story about a friend of mine. He is on a dating site because he is looking for someone to date (obviously).

So anyway, he is telling me that there are no qualified people in his area.

I was like, “That’s impossible.”

He was like, “Yea, it’s true.”

I said, “So tell me what happened?”

Like many people, he said, “Well, that girl was crazy. This girl was mean. That one texted too many messages to me, etc.”

NOTE- It’s so funny how a guy that can’t find a girl to date will say that all women are “crazy.” I often ask them, “Have you considered that the problem could be you?” Anyway, that’s a good way to make people mad so I avoid that these days.

So anyway, he said to me, “You should look at my choices. If I put 10 miles from my zip code there’s nothing.”

I was like, “10 miles?”

He was like, “Yea, I wanted to go 5 but I thought that was too small of a radius.”

I was like, “How about 100 miles then?”

Then my friend goes into a tirade about how that’s too far, he has to work, he doesn’t have time, blah blah blah.

I said, “How about not being lazy and stretching if you are serious.”

Then I said, “You remind me of the people on my list or in my family that would say I can’t find a doctor where we live. There are NONE. You just don’t understand Dave.”

I would find out they wanted a doctor like about 5 minutes from their house.

I once said to my of my family members, “Maybe we can find a doctor in mom’s house somewhere if we look hard enough?” (I don’t know why I said that but it was funny to me.)

You need to take it serious when you’re looking for a doctor for your loved one. That’s one of the most important things I talk about in my courses/systems:

NEW LEARN THE SECRETS OF THE MOST SUCCESSFUL WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
http://www.bipolarsupporter.com/bipolarmastersystem/

SUPPORTING AN ADULT WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarsupporter.com/report11

SUPPORTING A CHILD/TEEN WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarparenting.com

HAVE BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.survivebipolar.net

Whether you are looking for a boy/girlfriend or a doctor, you are probably going to have to stretch — expand where you are willing to go.

Why?

Because it’s important, and you need to leave yourself options. You don’t want to have only one option and be stuck with that.

Can you imagine my friend having to be stuck with the first girlfriend he got matched up with just because he only left himself the radius of 5 miles? That would just be silly.

Or my mom picking a doctor only because he lived down the street and not because he was a good doctor?

What if he turned out to be a bad doctor, but she was stuck with him just because she limited her options?

Sometimes you just have to stretch a little bit, leave yourself more options, to get what you need.

It’s just plain the smart thing to do, don’t you think?

FIND OUT WHAT PEOPLE ARE SAYING ABOUT ME
Visit: http://www.bipolarcentral.com/testimonials

David Oliver is the author of the shocking guide “Bipolar Disorder—The REAL Silent Killer.” Click Here to get FREE Information sent via email on how and why bipolar disorder kills.

Hi,

Hope you’re doing ok today.

Here’s an email I got recently:

“Dave- I have bipolar disorder, and I know my husband loves me and all, but I’m tired of him hovering over me all the time, like I’m going to have a bipolar episode in the next 5 minutes. I’ve been stable awhile now, and I’m doing what I should be doing and I know I could go into another episode I’m not denying that, but I hate the way he watches me so closely, I wish he would just relax and trust me sometimes. Anyway, thanks for listening. Donna.”
——————————————————–

Interesting email, and it does bring up some good points.

Although I do tell you to watch for triggers and signs and symptoms in your loved one so that they don’t go into an episode…

If they’re doing everything they’re supposed to be doing to keep themselves stable and they haven’t gone into an episode for a long time (not to say they won’t ever go into another one)…

You don’t have to hover over them so much that it makes them so uncomfortable, because they might come to resent you, or they might actually feel like you’re interfering with their stability.

There comes a time where you need to relax and trust your loved one.

In my courses/systems below, I teach about what to do to maintain stability:

NEW EARN THE SECRETS OF THE MOST SUCCESSFUL WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
http://www.bipolarsupporter.com/bipolarmastersystem/

SUPPORTING AN ADULT WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarsupporter.com/report11

SUPPORTING A CHILD/TEEN WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarparenting.com

HAVE BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.survivebipolar.net

So if your loved one is doing these things, and has been doing them for a long time, you can relax a little bit and cut them some slack.

You need to trust them sometime.

If you don’t, you’ll burn out yourself!

If they are:

• Taking their medication
• Seeing their doctor
• Seeing their psychiatrist
• Seeing their therapist
• Getting the right amount of sleep
• Exercising
• Eating right
• Being productive
• Having hobbies
• Not isolating
• Not sleeping too much
• Not sleeping too little

Then I would relax and trust them more than you used to in the beginning.

It would sound to me as if they have a good handle on their stability.

And YOU need to take care of yourself!

You need to do the things that you need to do for yourself so that you can be there for them should they need you.

Now, I’m not saying that you shouldn’t still watch for PATTERNS of triggers, signs, and symptoms that may go on for awhile, because these could still indicate a bipolar episode.

This is just being a good supporter.

But just not on an hourly basis! : )

So relax and trust your loved one.

What do you think?

FIND OUT WHAT PEOPLE ARE SAYING ABOUT ME
Visit: http://www.bipolarcentral.com/testimonials

David Oliver is the author of the shocking guide “Bipolar Disorder—The REAL Silent Killer.” Click Here to get FREE Information sent via email on how and why bipolar disorder kills.