A friend was telling me about her 2 year old granddaughter the other day. She told me about what happened the last time she visited her. It totally cracked me up! So I thought I’d share it with you. Maybe it’ll put a smile on your face.
She was watching her granddaughter playing, and her granddaughter tipped over a box of balls,
and says, “gosh darn it!” Then she started coloring (she can’t really color yet, but she does kind of draw circles). But she broke the crayon! Again, she said, “gosh darn it!”
So she started playing with something else. And she played for a while, but then she took a
break. And she went to take a drink of her juice that was on the table. But she accidentally knocked her cup off the table, spilling the juice. So what did she say? You guessed it! “Gosh darn it!”
My friend was telling me this, and I thought it was hilarious, because I could totally picture this,
coming out of a 2 year old’s mouth! I mean, she probably heard the phrase from her mom, but for a 2 year old to say it, how cute!
Well, accidents do happen. And people do make mistakes. But what do you do when your loved one makes mistakes? I’m sure a “gosh darn it” does NOT cut it in their case, does it?
When a person is in a bipolar episode, they can say and do things they are not totally aware of.
I know that idea can be hard to grasp, especially for you, the supporter.
But it can be hard to understand that it is not your loved one’s fault when they do things in a bipolar episode that really aren’t their fault.
For example: Say your loved one is in a bipolar manic episode. And they are approached for a business venture. Well, normally they would thoroughly check out the business venture to make sure it is a sound investment.
Unfortunately, one of the characteristics of a manic episode is impulsivity. So in a manic episode, your loved one wouldn’t necessarily take those precautions.
So he invests all your savings. All of it! And it turns out the investment is a poor one. And you lose ALL your savings!
It was a mistake. So is it your loved one’s fault? You might feel like it is. You might really want to blame him. But it is really the fault of the bipolar disorder. Because he was in a bipolar episode when he made the investment. So he wasn’t really thinking rationally.
So what do you do? The thing is, you need to forgive him. Yep. You need to forgive him.
Sometimes bipolar disorder gets the best of us. And it’s not your loved one’s fault if they do
something because they are in an episode.
Now, in this example, I’m saying you forgive, but I’m not saying that you forget, because you
need to remember and to make sure it cannot happen again by making sure he cannot get to the savings in the future.
You can forgive your loved one without forgiving the act. They are two separate things.
Well, I have to go!