Revealed-Bipolar Disorder and Frustrated Expectations

=>PLEASE FORWARD TO FRIENDS, FAMILY AND LOVED ONES <= Hi, How’s it going? I hope you had a great
Easter if you celebrate it.

I didn’t do much. I actually went over
to my mom and dad’s house to eat.
I didn’t eat to much because I am
lowering my body fat so there are many
things that I can’t eat right now.

So know chocolate for me.

Oh and another thing. I am actually
thinking about volunteering in another
organization. It’s an organization that visits
people in the worst possible psychiatric institutions.
People who get no visitors. People who never will
be released probably. People who really have
severe mental illness. I am not talking about bipolar
disorder. Illnesses there really aren’t ways to manage
it. Illnesses with no real name.

My accountant says that I don’t have time for this
kind of stuff. He is kind of down on the entire mental
health thing. He says that I need to work hard in
things that maximize roi and in his mind that’s
not mental health it’s my other businesses.

I don’t agree with him but his job is to look out
for me.

Anyway, I am pretty sure that I am going to
start volunteering for this organization and help
them get the word out. The person who runs it
is a incredible guy with bipolar disorder. He thought
of the idea a while ago and wants to spread it all
over the country. I am not sure how much I can
help with that because I am super busy but
I can show up in various places and visit people.

Anyway, I think this is a great organization. I think
that someone has to help the people that have no help
at all. You see if you are on my list, you are either helping
someone or helping yourself. There are people that can’t
help themselves. AND they have no one to help them.

They have severe and I mean severe mental illness
and it’s really sad. But you can’t forget about these people.

So I am strongly considering volunteering with this
organization. I just have to figure out how to find
the time.

Hmmm.

Anyway, I wanted to talk about
something super important today.

I call it….

FRUSTRATED EXPECTATIONS

I know it’s a big deal to some, if
not most of you, for two reasons.
number #1, because I’m a supporter
myself, and I know that I have
frustrated expectations, and
number #2, because so many of you
have written and called me and tell me
the same thing.

So what are frustrated expectations?
Exactly what it says! No, don’t send me
hate mail because I’m treating you like a
dummy, I’m not, believe me. I just want
you to follow along with me. And remember,
I’m one of the people I’m talking about!

See, we bring something to the table –
being supporters of a loved one with
bipolar disorder, we bring to the table
all our fears, hurt, anger, resentments,
loneliness, all our negative feelings…
And, yes, our expectations.

Then those expectations aren’t met.
They’re frustrated.

Why? I’ll tell you why.

Because most of us, looking back,
never expected to be where (and who)
we are at this point in our lives.

We were sold a dream way back when
that did not include taking care of a loved
one with bipolar disorder, and everything
which that includes, especially our time and
emotions.

No one told us how difficult a JOB this
would be. And you know as well as I do
that this really is a JOB. One that probably
none of us signed up for.

Now, again, don’t send me hate mail,
because I’m not saying that you have to
do this and resent it as a job because
you don’t want to do it or don’t love your
loved one or anything.

I know you love your loved one and do it
and don’t get paid or anything and would
do it even if you never made a red cent.
But that’s not what I’m saying here!
Please hear me out before you make
a judgment call.

In my courses/systems, I talk about being a
good supporter, and I do talk about it as if
it were a job, one you have to train for:

SUPPORTING AN ADULT WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarsupporter.com/report11

SUPPORTING A CHILD/TEEN WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarparenting.com

HAVE BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.survivebipolar.net

Because when you really look at it, it
really is. And you may be your loved
one’s only supporter, and that puts a
lot of pressure on you.

And you may not have anyone to talk
about this to. So you may be holding a lot
of feelings inside you. And part of this may
be what I’m calling frustrated expectations.

Maybe your loved one wasn’t always like
this. Maybe they have only recently been
diagnosed with bipolar disorder (which
explains why they have been behaving
the way they have been).

But now you are facing a future with
bipolar disorder in it. You are looking at
a loved one who is going to always have
this disorder, and you are going to have to
live with it.

You may have had hopes and dreams that
you will now never be able to have fulfilled.
Your whole life may have changed now.

So…now you have unfulfilled frustrations.

What do you do about it?

You have to ACCEPT IT.

I know that sounds simple. It IS simple.

But it is NOT easy!

No, it isn’t easy, but its something you have
to do if you’re going to continue being your
loved one’s supporter. You cannot let this
build up and stay inside you, hoping that
someday things will be different, because
that is NOT a realistic expectation.

You have to put away your unfulfilled
frustrations forever, and deal with the
new reality you are facing now.

I know this may sound negative, and I don’t
mean for it too, really I don’t. You know how
much of a positive person I am, and how I
always try to encourage you to be too.

But what it is is REALISTIC! You must be
realistic. Face your future together with your
loved one in a realistic way.

So this is NOT negative! Your loved one can
still become a healthy, happy, successful
person with bipolar disorder, with your
love and support.

And you can have NEW expectations!

They just have to be REALISTIC expectations.

Your Friend,

Dave

===>> Great Resources For You <=== Get Your Own Subscription To This Newsletter
Want your own copy of these daily bipolar
emails sent to you for F.ree? If so, visit:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/register3

Get More Help On Bipolar Disorder
Don’t forget to take a look through the
different programs I’ve put together… each
one is designed to help you with a different
area of bipolar disorder whether you have it or
you are supporting someone with it.
You can see them all and get the details by visiting:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/catalog.asp

View Past Daily Bipolar Emails For F.REE
Check out my F.ree blog with copies of emails
that I have sent in the past and lots of great
information for you:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/supporterblog/

Get Audio Information On Bipolar Disorder For F.REE
Check out my F.ree podcast. Hear me give
mini seminars designed to teach you information
you can’t learn anywhere else.
http://bipolarcentral.libsyn.com

Bipolar Lesson From My Doctor Scare

=>PLEASE FORWARD TO FRIENDS, FAMILY AND LOVED ONES <= Hi, How’s it going? Happy Easter if you celebrate it. I hope you are doing well and have
a great day.

There other day, Thursday, I had
this situation.

I woke up and my feet felt really
strange.

It felt as if someone was taking
a pin and poking them. Then
as the hours went on, it felt like
the pins turned into knives.

Then my feet started to really
hurt. I thought it was kind of like
my foot was asleep for a while.

I thought it would go away.

It didn’t.

Then I start thinking about it.
The more I thought about it, the more
it seemed to get worse.

I started getting worried. I kept thinking
that maybe something was SERIOUSLY
wrong because it was so strange. Plus
it felt like my feet were cutting.

I thought maybe it will go away.
Then I though, maybe it won’t.

Then I started to wonder if it was
something really serious.

I know that “pins and needles” can
be a sign of diabetes. At least that’s
what I thought.

So then I went on with my day, kind of
ignoring it, hoping it would go away.

Then I thought to myself, “wouldn’t
it be hypocritical if I didn’t go
to the doctor and I tell people
dealing with bipolar disorder,
to take action immediately when
signs and symptoms are seen?”

Then I sat in the library parking
lot for a few minutes and decided
to go straight to the doctor and
drop everything.

So I went there. They asked lots
of questions and took blood for some
tests.

Since I am in really good shape, he didn’t
think it would be diabetes but I would
have to wait a few days for the results
of the test.

He felt that it was “foot trauma” possibly
since I went to NYC the other day for
that meeting I told you about. While
was there, I did a ton of walking, my feet
were soaking wet, and I didn’t have on good
walking shoes (obviously).

In addition, I started doing twice as much
walking on the treadmill. The doctor thinks
that this all combined may be the problem.

So we will see. The big bipolar lesson is
about taking immediate action when you see
signs and symptoms that aren’t right.

Many people do not do this—both bipolar
supporters and bipolar survivors.

In my courses/systems below, I talk about
how important this is.

SUPPORTING AN ADULT WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarsupporter.com/report11

SUPPORTING A CHILD/TEEN WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarparenting.com

HAVE BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.survivebipolar.net

If you see signs and symptoms and you don’t
take action, lots of bad things occur.

The bipolar episodes get worse and worse.
It’s MUCH easier to “catch” a bipolar
episode before it ramps up into an actual
episode or even like a super episode.

Not to mention when you catch the episode
early, all the normal bipolar damage doesn’t
occur—like destroyed finances, lost job,
lost friends, destruction, etc. You know
what I mean.

When I asked my doctor about people
who have to get their feet amputated because
of diabetes, he said, “Dave, the people know,
they just don’t do anything. You aren’t
just fine one day and then the next day your
feet have to be amputated because of diabetes.”

NOTE-I guess with diabetes your feet can get
really bad and have to be amputated. I am NOT
a doctor and really know little about diabetes and
I am not offering any medical advice. I am just telling
you want I heard.

Anyway, the doctor said, that people ignore all
the signs over a long period of time and finally
it’s really extreme.

I told him that I did “stuff” in the area of mental health.
He was surprised and of course knew someone who had
bipolar disorder.

I told him about how you have to “catch” bipolar episodes
before they get out of control.

He said there are many illnesses and disorders that people
can easily control if they catch them early enough. He said
however, unlike what I teach about taking action and
going to the doctor, people who it will go away by almost
magic.

I told him how with bipolar disorder, it’s the same thing.

I remember so many times over the years, my dad would
simply ignore my mom’s episode and hope that somehow
it would just fix itself. It NEVER did.

Don’t ever forget this important principle with bipolar
disorder. This goes for whether you are a supporter or
you are a bipolar survivor.

Does this make sense?

Let me know.

Your Friend,

Dave

===>> Great Resources For You <=== Get Your Own Subscription To This Newsletter
Want your own copy of these daily bipolar
emails sent to you for F.ree? If so, visit:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/register3

Get More Help On Bipolar Disorder
Don’t forget to take a look through the
different programs I’ve put together… each
one is designed to help you with a different
area of bipolar disorder whether you have it or
you are supporting someone with it.
You can see them all and get the details by visiting:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/catalog.asp

View Past Daily Bipolar Emails For F.REE
Check out my F.ree blog with copies of emails
that I have sent in the past and lots of great
information for you:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/supporterblog/

Get Audio Information On Bipolar Disorder For F.REE
Check out my F.ree podcast. Hear me give
mini seminars designed to teach you information
you can’t learn anywhere else.
http://bipolarcentral.libsyn.com

How to handle a bipolar disorder conflict

=>PLEASE FORWARD TO FRIENDS, FAMILY AND LOVED ONES <= Hi, How’s it going? Well today is Saturday, day before Easter. Hope you have a great day. Actually yesterday I had a little bit of a
scare—well it’s still kind of a scare.

I had to go to the doctor for something.

I am going to probably tell you tomorrow.
There’s a great bipolar lesson.

Anyway, let me jump into today’s topic
because I have to take off to go to the gym.

One of the things that people write to
me about a lot is conflicts between them
and their loved one, and ask me how they
can solve them.

Now, right up front, I’ll tell you what I
tell them. I’m not a therapist or a family
counselor , and I advise them to see one.

But I do offer suggestions, as I do in my
courses/systems, on how to handle
conflicts in a bipolar relationship:

SUPPORTING AN ADULT WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarsupporter.com/report11

SUPPORTING A CHILD/TEEN WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarparenting.com

HAVE BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.survivebipolar.net

You can eliminate many areas of
conflict just by having good
communication between you and
your loved one.

By good communication I mean
that you have to be clear on what
you’re saying. Both of you have to
be able to tell the other person
exactly what you are thinking and
feeling, without the other person
feeling defensive or getting angry.

Supporters can also set limits on
what language and types of behavior
they are willing to tolerate and not
tolerate from their loved one. For
example, they can say that they
won’t tolerate their loved one
yelling at them, and that is a
boundary that they won’t allow
their loved one to cross. Then
they have to stick to that.

Their loved one might say that
they are willing to talk about
everything except some sore
spot, and their supporter will
have to respect that boundary
and not cross it.

Communicating like this has
several benefits. for one
thing, it can help the two of
you to feel closer to each
other, as it opens the door
to a closer relationship
instead of fighting.

For another thing, it reduces
confusion, since you both
know the rules going in.

It also eliminates nagging,
cross words, criticism, and
arguments.

Another one of the good
Things is that it will give you
peace of mind, instead of
that feeling of walking on
eggshells all the time.

In this way you can offer
unconditional love and
support to your loved one
instead of fear, and you will
want to spend more time with
them.

Your Friend,

Dave

===>> Great Resources For You <=== Get Your Own Subscription To This Newsletter
Want your own copy of these daily bipolar
emails sent to you for F.ree? If so, visit:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/register3

Get More Help On Bipolar Disorder
Don’t forget to take a look through the
different programs I’ve put together… each
one is designed to help you with a different
area of bipolar disorder whether you have it or
you are supporting someone with it.
You can see them all and get the details by visiting:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/catalog.asp

View Past Daily Bipolar Emails For F.REE
Check out my F.ree blog with copies of emails
that I have sent in the past and lots of great
information for you:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/supporterblog/

Get Audio Information On Bipolar Disorder For F.REE
Check out my F.ree podcast. Hear me give
mini seminars designed to teach you information
you can’t learn anywhere else.
http://bipolarcentral.libsyn.com

Current Bipolar News

PLEASE FORWARD TO YOUR FRIENDS

Hi,

I hope you are doing well.

What a day I had yesterday. Two people
who have bipolar disorder and unfortunately
aren’t taking an medications created an
absolute nightmare for me.

I was really frustrated dealing with
what these people did. I must say
I can see how many a mental health
organization has closed it’s doors.

This field is unlike any other field
when it comes to potentially abuse
individuals.

I am going to write more about it probably
tomorrow and the big bipolar lesson that I
learned.

With that said, here’s the bipolar news.

Make sure you take a look. It takes a lot
of time to put the news together so please read it.

To see the news visit:

http://www.bipolarcentral.com/bipolarnews370

There’s some really interesting news stories this week.
Take a look at them. Also, write me some feedback by visiting my
blog below.

Here are some of the headlines:

Dealing with bipolar disorder is a constant battle
DO> Very good article.

‘Mood swings’ could be a sign of bipolar disorder
DO> Absolutely. Must read.

Road to recovery
DO> Very interesting, what do you think?

Love Rollercoaster: Dating With Bipolar Disorder
DO> I actually did an interview on this subject.

For these stories and more, please visit:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/bipolarnews370

==>> Get Help with ALL aspects of bipolar disorder<<== Check out all my resources, programs and information
for all aspects of bipolar disorder by visiting:

http://www.bipolarcentral.com/catalog.asp

Your Friend,

Dave

Warning, Don’t Get Caught In The Bipolar Doomsday Scenario

Hi,

If you are supporting a loved one with
bipolar disorder then you must learn how
to avoid the bipolar doomsday scenario.

A Bipolar Doomsday Scenario is when a loved one
goes through a Bipolar episode which has an
exceptionally destructive effect on friends and
family.

The final outcomes of Bipolar Doomsday Scenario
may range from a major disruption of a relationship
between a loved one and his/her set of friends and
families, to the entire destruction or separation of
a family and/or friends.

For more information visit:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/bipolardoomsdaysale

I have special offer for the first 75 people
or before Monday, March 24, 2008.

Thanks.

Dave

Is this the truth about bipolar disorder?

=>PLEASE FORWARD TO FRIENDS, FAMILY AND LOVED ONES <= Hi, I read something interesting this week,
and I wanted to share it with you, see
what you think about it. It’s by M. Scott
Peck, M.D., from the book The Road Less
Traveled. The thing about it is that it was
written in 1978, but it is still as true
today as it was back then:

“Life is difficult. This is a great truth,
one of the greatest truths. It is a great truth
because once we truly see this truth, we
transcend it. Once we truly know that life
is difficult – once we truly understand and
accept it – then life is no longer difficult.
Because once it is accepted, the fact that
life is difficult no longer matters.”

————————————————–

Wow! Don’t you think that’s powerful?
I sure do.

Especially when you’re living with
bipolar disorder. Just living life in
general is difficult enough, but when
you throw bipolar disorder into the
mix, it can seem practically impossible
sometimes, doesn’t it?

We’ve talked about truth and bipolar
disorder before, but not in this way.
What Dr. Peck is talking about is
accepting truth in such a way as to
rise above it once we understand it
and accept it.

So the key is to accept the truth,
Like accepting the truth of having
bipolar disorder, because once you
do, the next thing you have to do
is learn all you can about it, so you
have the knowledge you need to
rise above it – to make that
knowledge work for you, instead
of against you. In fact, that’s
one of the things that I teach
in my courses/systems:

SUPPORTING AN ADULT WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarsupporter.com/report11

SUPPORTING A CHILD/TEEN WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarparenting.com

HAVE BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.survivebipolar.net

I like the way Dr. Peck says that
once we truly understand and accept
that life is difficult, then life is no
longer difficult. I mean, he doesn’t
say that anything changes or anything,
I mean nothing changes in your life
except your attitude towards it!

Just like I’m always telling you –
It’s always in the way you look at
things – you can look at them in a
negative way (then you’re defeated)
or in a positive way (then you’re
positive and proactive).

If you believe that your life is
a mess just because you or a loved
one has bipolar disorder and it has
just ruined your life, then you will
become a self-fulfilling prophecy,
and bipolar disorder probably will
ruin your life.

But if you look at it as a challenge,
that you’re going to overcome,
look at it like you are going to beat
it, no matter what, then that will be
your self-fulfilling prophecy, and
you will beat the bipolar disorder.

I think what Dr. Peck is saying is
that YOU are responsible for how
you look at life. You have a
CHOICE. You can look at it like
it’s really difficult, or you can look
at the very same life and understand
and accept it and life is no longer as
difficult as you thought it was.

That’s the way you need to look at
your or your loved one’s disorder.

As Dr. Peck says, “[then] the fact that
life is difficult no longer matters.”

What do you think? Do you agree
with him or not?

Your Friend,

Dave

===>> Great Resources For You <=== Get Your Own Subscription To This Newsletter
Want your own copy of these daily bipolar
emails sent to you for F.ree? If so, visit:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/register3

Get More Help On Bipolar Disorder
Don’t forget to take a look through the
different programs I’ve put together… each
one is designed to help you with a different
area of bipolar disorder whether you have it or
you are supporting someone with it.
You can see them all and get the details by visiting:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/catalog.asp

View Past Daily Bipolar Emails For F.REE
Check out my F.ree blog with copies of emails
that I have sent in the past and lots of great
information for you:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/supporterblog/

Get Audio Information On Bipolar Disorder For F.REE
Check out my F.ree podcast. Hear me give
mini seminars designed to teach you information
you can’t learn anywhere else.
http://bipolarcentral.libsyn.com

Ever have these emotions with bipolar disorder?

=>PLEASE FORWARD TO FRIENDS, FAMILY AND LOVED ONES <= Hi, How’s it going? Hope you are doing well. Yesterday my blog was broken.
For some reason, every now and then
it just breaks down. Sorry if
you were trying to read or post on it.

It’s back up now.

Hey guess what?

I am actually going to a meeting
in New York City today.

Before I leave, I want to talk about bipolar
disorder and negative emotions,
which might surprise you, since I’m
always so positive.

But there is a negative side to
bipolar disorder, as you know.
But if I do talk about the negative
side, you know I must have a
positive side to go with it, so just
bear with me and we’ll get to that.

Let’s take a look at the negative
emotions first, some of the
emotions you’ve felt, whether
you are a survivor or a supporter:
anger, fear, guilt, hopelessness,
helplessness, resentment, sad,
cheated, worried, frightened,
and many other negative emotions
these are just a few that come
to mind.

If you are a supporter, then let’s
just be honest. I’m sure you are
feeling now, or felt in the
beginning, “I didn’t sign up for
this,” or something like that,
unless you knew from the
beginning that your loved one
had bipolar disorder.

If you have bipolar disorder, you
may even be feeling the same
way. You may be feeling just as
confused as your supporter that
you are feeling such negative
emotions.

Does it help to know that these
are just NORMAL?

Maintaining any relationship is
difficult in itself without adding
bipolar disorder to the mix, and
then even more so by adding all
the negative emotions to it.

For supporters, it’s almost worse
than for the survivor. You didn’t
ask for this. You may be thinking,
“This is not MY illness,” and yet
you must live with it day after
day.

The emotions this thing
stirs up can be horrendous.
Yet, as a good supporter, you
have to keep these emotions
inside of you.

Keeping all this stuffed inside
can build up and make things
worse with your loved one,
because unless you talk to them,
they have no idea how you are
feeling. And if they don’t know,
they can’t do anything about it.

In my courses/systems, I talk
about how to communicate
with your loved one and go
into things you should say
and not to say, both when they
are in an episode and when they
aren’t:

SUPPORTING AN ADULT WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarsupporter.com/report11

SUPPORTING A CHILD/TEEN WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarparenting.com

HAVE BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.survivebipolar.net

But the main thing I want you to
know is that it is normal to feel the
way you do. I’ve talked to many
supporters who have shared with
me the same thing, and they thought
they were alone, too, as you probably
do.

Well, you are NOT alone!

And it’s ok to feel the way you do.

The point is, what are you going to
do with all these negative emotions?

You can keep stuffing them until they
simmer inside you and boil over like
a hot pot of water and eventually
spill over onto your loved one.
That’s your choice. It’s a negative
choice, but it’s your choice.

You can talk to a therapist about
it. This way at least you are getting
these emotions out and talking to
someone about it. This is a better
choice, but still not the best choice.

The best choice is to wait until your
loved one is not in an episode,
and hopefully in a good mood, or
at least in an open-minded mood,
and talk to them about your feelings.

Make sure you use positive statements,
affirming, supportive statements,
like, “You know I love you, but…”
or “I’ve been supportive throughout
this whole thing, but…”

Then your loved one will be more
likely to listen to what you have to
say, without getting angry or
defensive.

For those of you who have tried
this method, I’d love to hear
from you, as I’m sure other
readers would.

I’d love to hear some
success stories, so let me know
what has worked for you.

I am off to my meeting in New
York. Talk to you later.

Your Friend,

Dave

===>> Great Resources For You <=== Get Your Own Subscription To This Newsletter
Want your own copy of these daily bipolar
emails sent to you for F.ree? If so, visit:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/register3

Get More Help On Bipolar Disorder
Don’t forget to take a look through the
different programs I’ve put together… each
one is designed to help you with a different
area of bipolar disorder whether you have it or
you are supporting someone with it.
You can see them all and get the details by visiting:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/catalog.asp

View Past Daily Bipolar Emails For F.REE
Check out my F.ree blog with copies of emails
that I have sent in the past and lots of great
information for you:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/supporterblog/

Get Audio Information On Bipolar Disorder For F.REE
Check out my F.ree podcast. Hear me give
mini seminars designed to teach you information
you can’t learn anywhere else.
http://bipolarcentral.libsyn.com

Do you say this about bipolar disorder?

=>PLEASE FORWARD TO FRIENDS, FAMILY AND LOVED ONES <=
Hi,

How it going? I hope you are doing well.

I wanted to talk about something rather
interesting it today.

I was talking to someone who wanted
to do some work for me. She said, “
I suffer from bipolar disorder, but
I am stable and can do well.”

I asked her the following question,
“Do you really suffer from it?”

She said, “umm well yea I do.”

I said, “you really still do? How
are you stable and still suffering?”

She said, “well I don’t mean that
I am really suffering on a day
to day basis like in torture. It
use to be torture but now I have
it under control.”

I then asked her if she thought
that language is powerful and
if she kept saying she suffered
from bipolar disorder, it would
make her worse…even just a
little.

She thought about it and said,
“you’re right, I don’t know why
I said that, I don’t really suffer
from it. It’s kind of an advantage for
me since I learned how to manage it.”

So then I said, “why do you say
that you suffer then?” She said,
“I don’t really know.”

I said to her that it was interesting.

From then we talked about the job
requirements.

But then I thought how I wanted to send
out an email talking about the power
of language and how people can wind
up saying stuff that creates problems
for them.

In my courses/systems below:

SUPPORTING AN ADULT WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarsupporter.com/report11

SUPPORTING A CHILD/TEEN WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarparenting.com

HAVE BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.survivebipolar.net

I talk about this a lot. Also, when
you get my courses/systems, and you
listen to the success interviews,
you’ll notice that people never
speak negatively whether they
have bipolar disorder or they
are a supporter.

BIPOLAR SUPPORTERS SAY

-My loved one is always in an episode
-He/she will never get better
-Bipolar disorder is a nightmare
-Bipolar always ruins our holidays

THOSE WITH BIPOLAR SAY
-I can never get better
-Doctors only care about money
-Therapist only want your money
-I am never stable
-I’ve tried every medication and nothing
works (this is super common)
-Bipolar disorder destroyed me

I am sure you get the idea.

My statements actually become what’s
called the self-fulfilling prophecy. Which
is when you actually speak into existence
something that was not previously reality
into reality.

The person that tells him/herself over and
over again he/she is no good at math becomes
no good at math. I am sure you know people
like this.

Today you should make a list of negative
things that you say and systemically work
to stop saying them. Replace them with
positive affirmations.

-My loved one can get better
-I can manage bipolar disorder
-Bipolar disorder is a serious illness
but it can be managed with proper medication
and treatment.

Etc.

Make sense? Let me know your thoughts
about this.

Your Friend,

Dave

===>> Great Resources For You <=== Get Your Own Subscription To This Newsletter
Want your own copy of these daily bipolar
emails sent to you for F.ree? If so, visit:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/register3

Get More Help On Bipolar Disorder
Don’t forget to take a look through the
different programs I’ve put together… each
one is designed to help you with a different
area of bipolar disorder whether you have it or
you are supporting someone with it.
You can see them all and get the details by visiting:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/catalog.asp

View Past Daily Bipolar Emails For F.REE
Check out my F.ree blog with copies of emails
that I have sent in the past and lots of great
information for you:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/supporterblog/

Get Audio Information On Bipolar Disorder For F.REE
Check out my F.ree podcast. Hear me give
mini seminars designed to teach you information
you can’t learn anywhere else.
http://bipolarcentral.libsyn.com

Divorced woman reveals great bipolar strategy

=>PLEASE FORWARD TO FRIENDS, FAMILY AND LOVED ONES <=
Hi,

How’s it going?

I hope you are doing well today.

Lots of posts yesterday about my
question that I posed to you.

If you missed it, please read the blog
below.

Today I wanted to tell you about this
divorced woman that I met.

I was talking to her on the treadmill which
I spend a whole lot of time on.

Anyway, she started talking about politics
and then I told her that makes my head hurt
so she stopped talking about that.

She started talking about how society has
changed and many people aren’t into commitment.
She told me how she was divorced. She was about 55
or so years old.

She warned me about what kinds of woman to
avoid if I wanted to be happily married.

I asked her if she ever thought she would
get married again.

She said, “honey, I would like to but
but they have to pass my tests?”

I was like, “what tests?”

She was like, “honey, I have a bunch of tests
that have to see how they act. If they
fail then I am gone.”

I said, “yea what kind of tests like
SATs or the LSAT?”

She looked at me like I was crazy. It was a
non funny joke :). I knew she wasn’t asking
them math, English and science questions.

So she said how she had all these little
tests.

Here are some of them. She would ask
questions and put the guys in situations
that required them to make decisions. She
would rate the decisions.

Things like:

Would a guy drink and drive

Would the guy do drugs?
(she didn’t really explain how she tested
him for this).

Would the guy return her calls
in a timely fashion

She then said she had a cheating
test. It involved her asking a person
she was dating about a situation with
someone cheating. Based on the answers
she received, she was 98% confident
she could tell if this person would
cheat on her.

She had “lazy test.” I didn’t
really understand how she did
this test as well.

She had a “are you putting on
an act test.” Again, this one
confused me.

Now you might be thinking….this
woman is harsh or how can she know all
this or what the heck does this have to
do with bipolar disorder.

All great questions. First, since I was
DEAD tired doing cardio, I was paying attention
but I missed some key parts. Plus it’s loud
in the gym. But she seemed confident in
her “testing her man system.”

So I told her what I did for a living. All
the different businesses I had. She looked at me like
I was crazy. She didn’t know what bipolar
disorder was but she knew what depression
was. She said that her last husband depressed
her 🙂

Anyway I told her how I liked to test my
systems, doctors and therapists.

She asked what I meant.

I said for example, I will fax a doctor
information that’s important and ask for a
response.

This tests:

Do they read their faxes
Do they respond to their faxes
Do they lose faxes
Do they know what they are talking about

Same thing with the therapist as well.

I also do it with voicemails. I test
response time. I test follow through.

Do you know how many tens of thousands
of people on my list tell me that
their doctor or therapist NEVER get
back to them with an emergency. It’s
so common that people start to believe
it’s the norm. You might even have a story
like this.

I also use to (not so much now), run
tests of my systems in my head to see
what would happen.

I have real world experience with
test results. All of what you find
in my systems/courses below

SUPPORTING AN ADULT WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarsupporter.com/report11

SUPPORTING A CHILD/TEEN WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarparenting.com

HAVE BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.survivebipolar.net

is the result of real practical testing of
what works and doesn’t work.

It is NOT theory. There is nothing
worse than an unproven theory. Know what
I mean? I mean when you need to know
something and someone just throws out
something that know one has ever done
or used and you try it and it’s a disaster.

I use to “run scenarios” in my head
and tests to see how my systems would hold
up.

I would ask myself….

What would happen if my mom went into a
super manic episode today. Who would do
what, when, how? What would my dad do?
What if my mom undid all the medical
releases that I didn’t have. What would
happen if her doctor retired. What
happens if her therapist quits?

What happens if my mom tries to
spend all her money again?

What happens if my mom tells everyone that
I can’t talk to them about her disorder.

I have solutions to all these potential
problems. All as a result of tests conducts
over the years.

I like to tests many people in the system.

For example, I test the pharmacy. I might find
some important information in a book
that they should know, like such and
such medication should not be taken in
the morning or at 4:00pm. I will ask
general questions. Check the responses.
If the responses make no sense, then
I know I have a potential problem.

You could say something like, “so it’s
okay to take this just once with alcohol
right?” If you hear, “oh sure, it’s
okay just once” run for the hills.
Because it’s NOT okay to take medication
with alcohol, just once.

I find that with bipolar disorder, that
a whole lot of systems, people and
places you thought you can count on totally
break down in the time of a bipolar
episode.

I like to test a lot of it ahead of time.

This lady said, “that sounds really interesting
honey…it sounds like a good smart idea. It’s
just like I do with my dates?”

NOTE-I don’t know why she kept calling me
honey. I kept telling her my name was
Dave. Sometimes she called me Steve however
🙂

I have no idea 🙂

I think everyone should consider doing
this. You don’t make it a big deal. You don’t
burden anyone you are testing but you throw
out some tests. See how people respond
because if they don’t response well in
the good times, they probably aren’t
going to be helpful in the bad times (
when bipolar episodes occur).

Check the systems as well. You can
run through things in your head.

Hey, I have to run.

Your Friend,

Dave

===>> Great Resources For You <=== Get Your Own Subscription To This Newsletter
Want your own copy of these daily bipolar
emails sent to you for F.ree? If so, visit:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/register3

Get More Help On Bipolar Disorder
Don’t forget to take a look through the
different programs I’ve put together… each
one is designed to help you with a different
area of bipolar disorder whether you have it or
you are supporting someone with it.
You can see them all and get the details by visiting:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/catalog.asp

View Past Daily Bipolar Emails For F.REE
Check out my F.ree blog with copies of emails
that I have sent in the past and lots of great
information for you:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/supporterblog/

Get Audio Information On Bipolar Disorder For F.REE
Check out my F.ree podcast. Hear me give
mini seminars designed to teach you information
you can’t learn anywhere else.
http://bipolarcentral.libsyn.com

Is this true about David Oliver and Bipolar Disorder?

Hi,

How’s it going?

I actually have to head off to the gym.
I am doing cardio this morning because
I am going to be missing some of it next
week.

Anyway, I wanted to drop you a quick email
about something.

Oh I almost forgot something. I have
this Special Offer that ends tonight.

You can check it out here:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/bipolarbusiness2

The strange thing is, I can’t post the words
that describe it because of the darn s.pam
filters. So I figured that I would just
post the link.

Anyway, back to what I was saying…

It (what I was going to talk about) was something
that I was going to ask you the
other day but something else came up.

Someone posted the following post on my blog.

BabyJ87 said…
I would like to know why you are only really
posting success storys. There are so many people
out here including me who aren’t success storys,
and get sick and tired of hearing how well others
who have help are doing. Some of us can’t get help
and don’t like to hear only success storys.

Sometimes it helps to show people what can happen
when you don’t do the things you need to to gain
control over bipolar disorder. Which brings me to m
y next question. Is there anyone out there who
can give me advice on how to deal with
bipolar disorder during pregnancy?
I can’t really take meds, and if I could
I wouldn’t be able to get them anyway.

============================

I actually scheduled a meeting with my key
people that work for me that have bipolar
disorder and read this post to them and
asked what they thought.

The question is, “should I post negative
or “so and so isn’t doing well stories”
on an ongoing basis?”

What do you think?

Please post responses on my blog below.

I will tell you, here is what I think.
There are TONS of negative stories out
there. Just type in murder and bipolar
or suicide and bipolar or homicide and
bipolar or killed and bipolar into
any search engine and you’ll find a ton
of non success stories.

When I first started this, I use to get
serious hate mail from people saying
that my Friday news was way too negative
and that I was being negative. If you’ve
been on my list for years, you might
remember me defending myself and posting
a letter saying that:

I don’t make the news
I don’t create the news
I don’t filter the news

I simply post the bipolar news. After
that, I started getting a lot less
hate mail and death threats on this
subject.

But, when I started this, I quickly
found out that many people with bipolar
disorder do VERY well. They can be your
lawyer, your boss, your best sales person,
or someone else really smart, creative
and doing well–you just don’t know it.

Why? Well because they don’t have a marker
on them that says, “bipolar.” With that
said, my goal was to find people who
weren’t a success and became a success
and then talk about them. Ask them questions.
Find out what they are doing. Let others
learn from them.

In my courses/systems below:

SUPPORTING AN ADULT WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarsupporter.com/report11

SUPPORTING A CHILD/TEEN WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarparenting.com

HAVE BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.survivebipolar.net

You’ll find that I went out and found
all kinds of success stories. These
are:

people with bipolar disorder that were
previously not doing well and now are
doing well

people who were supporting adults with
bipolar disorder that were previously
not doing well and now are doing well

People who are supporting children
less than 18 years old that were not
doing well and now are doing well.

With that said, my goal was to always
find people and then figure out what
they are doing and then teach everyone.

Then it’s up to you, to model their
success. What the heck does that mean?

It means that you look at them and simply
start to do what they are doing so you
can get the same results.

Here’s the deal. If you are struggling with
bipolar disorder whether you are a supporter
or a person with the disorder and you are
struggling over an extended period of time,
it’s because your plan or strategy is not
working well.

What do you do? Do you get super mad and
then run off and hide in a corner? No. Do
you simply just throws your hands up in the
air and say “this is not fair, I hate life.”
No. Do you keep doing the same thing over
and over and hoping for a different result?
No.

What you do is change your strategy. You
do this by finding a different one. Where
do you find a different one? You either
invent it yourself or learn from someone else
and them model the person.

I know that people don’t have the time to
take off a year from work like I did. So I go
out and find the success stories and talk about
them so you can learn.

The alternative would be to find non success stories
and talk about them. If I did that, what would be the
point? Would it be so people could model failure?

Now these are all my opinions, you may think
otherwise.

Please post your thoughts. BUT, please do not
attack the woman that made that blog post. She
is asking a legitimate question and no one
should attack her personally. Okay?

Well I have to head to the gym. Catch you tomorrow
morning.

Your Friend,

Dave

===>> Great Resources For You <=== Get Your Own Subscription To This Newsletter
Want your own copy of these daily bipolar
emails sent to you for F.ree? If so, visit:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/register3

Get More Help On Bipolar Disorder
Don’t forget to take a look through the
different programs I’ve put together… each
one is designed to help you with a different
area of bipolar disorder whether you have it or
you are supporting someone with it.
You can see them all and get the details by visiting:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/catalog.asp

View Past Daily Bipolar Emails For F.REE
Check out my F.ree blog with copies of emails
that I have sent in the past and lots of great
information for you:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/supporterblog/

Get Audio Information On Bipolar Disorder For F.REE
Check out my F.ree podcast. Hear me give
mini seminars designed to teach you information
you can’t learn anywhere else.
http://bipolarcentral.libsyn.com