Hi,

How are you?

Here is today’s news.

To read this week’s news visit:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/bipolarnews414

Bipolar Disorder Epidemic
DO>Hmm. Do you agree?

What Can I Expect From Treatment For Bipolar Disorder?
DO> Great article.

Beyond Disabilities
DO> Another good article, don’t you think?

Find Out All You Can About Child’s Bipolar Diagnosis
DO> Supporting a child? Read this.

NAMI Basics Program Provides Help To Families
DO> Good program.

Schizophrenia, Bipolar Disorder: Gene Link?
DO> Wow, this is VERY interesting.

For these stories and more, please visit:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/bipolarnews414

==>Help with ALL aspects of bipolar disorder<<==

Check out all my resources, programs and information for all aspects of bipolar disorder by visiting:

http://www.bipolarcentral.com/catalog.asp

David Oliver is the author of the shocking guide “Bipolar Disorder—The REAL Silent Killer.” Click Here to get FREE Information sent via email on how and why bipolar disorder kills.

Hi,

Hope you’re doing ok.

Today’s subject is a serious one, because of an email I got in response to my post about being supportive  but not enabling:

Jeannie1 says:
“Could someone please tell me what to do when I am trying to be a supporter not an enabler. When the lady I support is in a manic episode, do I walk away from her, do I sit there and take the abuse, how do I handle this???? I know when the episodes are coming, I just don’t know what to do. I have tried everything at this point and to tell you the truth I am ready to walk away. It is my responsibility to help her when she is in an episode because she is totally unable to help herself but she gets so abusive and tells me to get away from her. I try talking to her but of course it doesn’t work, she just gets more and more abusive…”
——————————————————-

Now, I’m not a doctor or therapist, so I can’t give that kind of advice, but I can try to at least address some of the comments made in this post, because I think it brings up a serious subject we should talk about – abuse and bipolar disorder.

The first thing I would say to this person and to you is that if violence or abuse is involved and you are getting hurt, that is wrong. You need to protect yourself. You don’t have to accept the unacceptable, and you shouldn’t accept physical abuse. No one should, and bipolar disorder is NOT an excuse!

If you are being physically abused, you seriously need to consider getting the police involved and/or leaving your loved one. You do not have to tolerate it, just because they have bipolar disorder. Would you tolerate it from someone who does not have bipolar disorder?

Ok, with that said, let’s go on to some other things this person says in her post.

She says she knows when the episodes are coming, she just doesn’t know what to do.

That’s one of the things I teach in my courses /systems – how to be prepared ahead of time for episodes and what to do about them.

SUPPORTING AN ADULT WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
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HAVE BIPOLAR DISORDER?
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You have to be prepared in advance.

Sit down with your loved one during a time when they are NOT in an episode and determine together a plan of what you will do when they are in an episode.

Unfortunately, in this person’s case, where it sounds like their loved one might become violent, they would have to determine what to do when the person becomes abusive.

You need to set some boundaries with your loved one about what is acceptable behavior and what is not acceptable behavior.

You also need to determine what the consequences of unacceptable behavior should be.

The hard part for you, as the supporter, will be to stick to your boundaries. But you must do so. You must make them accept responsibility for their behavior, even if they don’t want to.

What about you?

Have you dealt with an abusive loved one with bipolar disorder?

If so, please share with us how you have handled it.

And as far as this post, do YOU think this person should leave their loved one, like they are asking you?

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David Oliver is the author of the shocking guide “Bipolar Disorder—The REAL Silent Killer.” Click Here to get FREE Information sent via email on how and why bipolar disorder kills.

Hi,

How’s it going?

I hope you are doing well.

You know, somebody actually wrote me and asked me if there was a recipe for optimism.

I also was thinking about the inauguration yesterday and seeing how many people feel optimistic about the state of affairs in the United States (which has been going through a hard time).

So I want to tell you a recipe for optimism.

Now before you get all critical or laugh it off, let me tell you that I really thought about this! I know there really isn’t a “recipe,” per se, but there is something to be said for it.

Because another supporter asked, “How can we be optimistic when our loved one has bipolar disorder?”

Now do you see why I gave it some serious thought?

Well, let me tell you a few things about optimism first.

“It is or it ain’t,” as a friend of mine says. “You can’t have it both ways.”

Meaning that if you’re not optimistic, then you must be pessimistic.

You can’t see the glass as half-full and half-empty at the same time.

See what I mean? You’re either an optimist or a pessimist.

And in my courses/systems, I encourage optimism, because I believe having a positive attitude is just as important a part of management of bipolar disorder as the other parts, like medication and therapy.

SUPPORTING AN ADULT WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
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SUPPORTING A CHILD/TEEN WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
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HAVE BIPOLAR DISORDER?
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But let’s get back to optimism (great subject, isn’t it?)

It isn’t something you can learn.

Or something your parents can teach you.

Or a secret a friend passes onto you.

Or something you can do research about, or study in a laboratory.

Optimism isn’t something tangible. It isn’t something you can touch.

It isn’t something you can even experience with any one of your five senses, for that matter.

But optimism DOES exist! It IS real! And some people DO have it!

In fact, those people are very glad to have it.

Optimism just IS.

It is a choice. It is a decision. One that you can make, if you want.

So how can you be optimistic if your loved one has bipolar disorder?

For every day that your loved one goes without an episode, you can be optimistic that they’ll go the next day without one, too.

If they’re taking their medication like they’re supposed to, you can be optimistic that they’ll stay medication compliant and continue to do well.

If they’re following their treatment plan faithfully, they you can be optimistic that stability is in their future.

If they’re healthy, you can be optimistic that they’ll stay healthy.

And especially, if they’re doing all of the above, you can be optimistic that the two of you can enjoy your loved one’s stability in the future.

And as far as a “recipe” for optimism?

Well, there really isn’t one (but you knew that J)

But if there were, it would probably go something like this:

RECIPE FOR BIPOLAR OPTIMISM

Take one part positive thinking
Add one cup good attitude
Add an ounce of adventure
A cup of excitement
A bunch of understanding
Another bunch of support
A lot of patience
And top it all off with good feelings
And hope for tomorrow

So do you agree or disagree with me?

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David Oliver is the author of the shocking guide “Bipolar Disorder—The REAL Silent Killer.” Click Here to get FREE Information sent via email on how and why bipolar disorder kills.

Hi,

How’s it going?

There’s one thing you can never stop doing when you’re dealing with bipolar disorder, and that’s LEARNING.

When your loved one was first diagnosed, you should have gotten your hands on every bit of information you could about bipolar disorder, learned everything you could about your loved one’s disorder (and they should have, too).

But then it’s too easy to fall into complacency after time goes by.

Maybe it’s been a long time.

Maybe you think you’ve learned all there is to learn about bipolar disorder.

But I warn you, that’s dangerous thinking.

Because there’s always new information coming out about the disorder.

And you should never stop learning.

I have all kinds of information in my courses/systems, and one of the things I stress the most is to never stop learning about bipolar disorder.

SUPPORTING AN ADULT WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarsupporter.com/report11

SUPPORTING A CHILD/TEEN WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarparenting.com

HAVE BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.survivebipolar.net
I have had some people who’ve worked for me who stopped learning, so they didn’t improve in their job. They just kept living off knowledge they had before.

So do you think they advanced in the company? No, they didn’t. Some of them didn’t even last in their jobs very long at all.

All because they stopped learning.

It’s the same with your doctors, psychiatrists and therapists.

How good do you think they would be if they just kept practicing just with the knowledge they already had about bipolar disorder?

What if they didn’t keep up on new techniques, if they didn’t read about the new advances and new research on the disorder?

Do you think they would be the best professionals for your loved one?

Now what about you?

Don’t you want to be the best supporter you can be?

Then don’t stop learning.

Keep reading up on bipolar disorder.

There is always new information on the internet.

I am always keeping up with the latest news, research and information on my website that you can get to real easy. That’s why it’s there – for you.

Remember –

Never stop learning about bipolar disorder.
FIND OUT WHAT PEOPLE ARE SAYING ABOUT ME
Visit: http://www.bipolarcentral.com/testimonials

David Oliver is the author of the shocking guide “Bipolar Disorder—The REAL Silent Killer.” Click Here to get FREE Information sent via email on how and why bipolar disorder kills.

Hi,

How’s it going?

I want to tell you a quick story about how I thought of today’s topic. Yesterday was crazy.

You’re never going to believe what happen to me yesterday.

Okay, so I late last evening I had to go out to the mall to pick something up.

I was driving along and guess what?

It started to snow. I HATE driving in the snow. I HATE it. Seriously.

So I was too far along to turn back.

I called a friend and asked if it was suppose to snow a lot. My friend said the weather said no.

So I just drove on.

Anyway, I went to the mall. I got what I had to get.

Then all of a sudden Macy’s was ordering everyone out IMMEDIATELY a little before closing.

Then they announced that you could only get out of one door in the entire store. This store was HUGE.

Every door I went to was locked. Even the people working their didn’t know which door was open and you could get out.

Finally I found it. Guess what?

I was in the lower parking lot. My car was in the upper parking lot.

In order for me to get their I either had to walk on the road with cars sliding all over the place and risk getting hit (there was no side walk) or walk in the snow and grass and climb a huge fence.

I decided to walk on the road. There where little kids walking with me with their parents. They were crying because it was so darn cold.

Cars were driving fast towards us and sliding. I told everyone to be careful.

So we were going to the parking lot where all our cars were. Guess what? We had to walk up this huge hill.

The hill was like a sheet of ice. I almost fell three times.

Everyone, including little kids, women and men were sliding, falling and couldn’t really make it.

One kid had boots and got to the top and took my bag so I could focus on climbing myself.

Then we made sure that everyone climbed up the hill safely.

It was crazy.

It reminded me how many mental health hospitals work-crazy!

So then, I get in my car, turn it on to let it warm up.

I then get out of my car to clean it off and then when I went back to open the car door…guess what?

It was locked.

I was sooooooo mad. I couldn’t believe it.

The car was locked with the car running.

I had no food, water, warm clothes. EVERYONE left as well. All I had was my cell phone.

I called American Express and they were super nice to me. I don’t know why I called them, I couldn’t think of anyone else to call. Anyway, they called a tow truck that came in 45 minutes to open the door.

I was so cold.

Now while I was sitting there, I had nothing to do but think and be cold.

Winter sure is here and there is an important bipolar lesson to learn from it.

I don’t know if it’s snowing where you are, but it sure is up north!

Michele, who works for me, says she had a huge blizzard her way the other day, and couldn’t even go outside!

It made me think of something:

There are two types of snow…

The one kind that is the kind that you wish for on Christmas…

You know, the one where the flakes are really pretty, and you sit inside all nice and cozy, and watch them slowly drift outside your window, but they don’t stick to the ground or anything.

Then there’s the huge blizzard kind, like Michele was talking about – the huge ugly kind, that overwhelming kind, that keeps you inside all cold and everything, and piles up on the ground and no one can even drive on the roads because of all the snow and ice.

It reminds me of bipolar disorder, and the two different ways you can look at things.

You can look at things as the “first snow” kind of way, where things just kind of come down in a slow, easy way, and you can handle them.

Or you can see everything as overwhelming, keeping you inside for fear of facing them, because they’re too hard.

Of course, which way you approach things is up to you.

I teach in my courses that your approach to things, whether you see them as something you can handle or as something that is overwhelming comes from your attitude.

SUPPORTING AN ADULT WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarsupporter.com/report11

SUPPORTING A CHILD/TEEN WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarparenting.com

HAVE BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.survivebipolar.net
So it’s up to you and your attitude.

If you have a victim attitude, then of course everything that happens to you is going to be someone else’s fault. You’re going to feel like you don’t deserve anything that comes your way, and everything is too hard to handle.

Obviously, that’s the hard way.

And you don’t need to have a victim mentality anyway, because you aren’t a victim. You’re a survivor.

If you have the attitude of a survivor, on the other hand, you’re going to have the “first snow” kind of attitude, and you’re going to believe that you CAN handle everything that life throws your way.

If you have this kind of attitude, obviously you’re going to get much further in life.

As a supporter, which attitude do you think is going to help your loved one more, the first one or the second one?

Your loved one needs to have a good attitude in order to get better.

And they’re going to be looking at you to be a good example.

So if they see that you are trying to not let things overwhelm you, then they will try that, too.

Try taking things just one day at a time.

Try making your life simpler rather than complicating it.

The less stress, the better – for you AND your loved one.

If there are things you need to get rid of in your life, then get rid of them (like those big snowstorms).

If taking things one day at a time is even too much for you right now, then start with taking things one hour at a time and build up from there.

It can be done.

It just depends on your attitude.

So which snow will YOU decide to have?

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David Oliver is the author of the shocking guide “Bipolar Disorder—The REAL Silent Killer.” Click Here to get FREE Information sent via email on how and why bipolar disorder kills.

Hi,

How’s it going today?

I saw this child in the grocery store the other day with his mother.

Now, this kid couldn’t have been more than 4 or 5.

Usually, kids that age are tugging on mom’s sleeve, wanting this or that, screaming or yelling, and causing general havoc to everyone around them.

What made this child different was that he was just walking down each aisle looking at everything like he was amazed, like everything was brand new to him – like he was seeing everything for the very first time!

When I go to the grocery store, I just go in and get what I need, and leave, don’t you?

I’ve been there so many times, that it’s just a chore for me.

How could anyone possibly find it exciting and new?

But remember, now, I’m an adult, and things like grocery stores no longer hold any allure for me.

Maybe I’m just getting old… LOL

But I kept thinking about this child even as I left the grocery store and went on with my errands.

For some reason, he had left a big impression upon me.

What if we could all stay like that child?

What if we still looked at life that way?

Like everything was still new and exciting…

Like there was wonder and awe in little things…

New things to still explore and delight in…

Instead of being “adult” and “mature” about everything, so grown-up that we forget how to be a child and just enjoy life?

Just because your loved one has bipolar disorder doesn’t mean you have to lose the perspective of a child.

Just because they have bipolar disorder doesn’t mean you can’t still be happy.

Just because they have bipolar disorder doesn’t mean you have to go around like you have this chip on your shoulder all the time.

In my courses/systems below, I talk about the hope you can have that your loved one can become high-functioning – that if they stick to their treatment plan, they can have stability:

SUPPORTING AN ADULT WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarsupporter.com/report11

SUPPORTING A CHILD/TEEN WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarparenting.com

HAVE BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.survivebipolar.net
Having bipolar disorder isn’t the end
of your life.

You can still have a “normal” life between episodes.

In fact, you should be living as normal a life as possible so that stability becomes a reality and there are fewer episodes in your loved one’s life.

I’m not saying to go bungie-jumping or anything just to have excitement in your life, but there are other things you can do to make your life enjoyable in spite of the bipolar disorder.

It’s all in your attitude!

Think about that child in the grocery store.

What made him different than other kids his age?

His wonderment at the things around him!

You can have that same wonderment again.

Try to see the beauty in the things around you.

Enjoy the simple pleasures in life.

Be grateful each day that your loved one is not in an episode.

Do things together that you both enjoy.

These things don’t have to be complicated, extravagant, or expensive.

I know a couple who both have bipolar disorder. And one of the things they both enjoy doing is playing board games together, like backgammon.

They enjoy just being together and talking. About “everything” and “nothing,” they say.

One of the greatest pleasures in life is simple companionship.

Having family around you.

Going through old photographs.

Watching the birds in your backyard.

Seeing a movie together.

Reading books side by side.

Cooking a meal together.

Going on a date (no matter how long you’ve been together).

Watching the rain (or snow) fall outside your window.

Take a lesson from the child in the grocery store.

Try to see the world from a child’s perspective again, and you’ll be much happier. Don’t let bipolar disorder steal your joy!

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David Oliver is the author of the shocking guide “Bipolar Disorder—The REAL Silent Killer.” Click Here to get FREE Information sent via email on how and why bipolar disorder kills.

Hi,

I hope you’re having a good day today.

Hey I wanted to clear something up.

I wrote the other day that I wanted to send out daily bipolar emails later on some days.

Some people though that I was going to only to send a few a week instead of daily. This is NOT the case.

What I am considering doing is sending three emails a week later than normal.

Meaning I would send them out later in the day like around 10am or 11:00am EST.

Make sense?

Okay, I had a disturbing conversation the other day, and I wanted to tell you about it.

I was at a support group meeting (you know I volunteer at a lot of them in different places), and a girl came up to me after the meeting and we started talking.

She said that she’s afraid to make any plans or do anything or go anywhere.

I asked her why.

She said that she was afraid of having an episode.

I told her that most people with bipolar disorder only have only one or two episodes a year.

She said, “Yes, but I never know when that episode is going to happen.”

I tried to tell her that hiding out, not doing anything or making any plans wasn’t going to help her or her disorder.

She seemed to get defensive, and I didn’t want her to get mad at me, but I still thought she should know more.

I said, “You need to learn more about bipolar disorder. It might help you.”

I guess she got mad at me anyway, because she just walked away.

But I didn’t think I did anything wrong. I think she didn’t know enough about bipolar disorder to understand that staying home hiding from the rest of the world can actually HURT you and can make your disorder worse!

To say nothing about how frustrating it can be to your supporter and your relationship with them.

In my courses/systems, I teach that you just can’t live in fear of when the next episode is going to strike. If you are managing your bipolar disorder correctly, then you should have no fear.

SUPPORTING AN ADULT WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarsupporter.com/report11

SUPPORTING A CHILD/TEEN WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarparenting.com

HAVE BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.survivebipolar.net
I really didn’t mean to offend this girl, but maybe she just didn’t understand what I was trying to say, or maybe I just said it the wrong way.

If so, I’m sorry. But I really don’t want people with bipolar disorder to be misinformed. That’s one of the biggest reasons why I started bipolarcentral.com and started sending out these daily emails. I want people

to have the best information possible. Hiding out at home, not doing things outside the home, not going anywhere, not doing anything enjoyable, and living with the fear of when the next episode is going to strike is like living in a bipolar prison.

It’s like waiting to die!

And bipolar disorder is NOT a life sentence!

So many people are living quite normal lives even though they have bipolar disorder. That’s what I really wanted to tell this girl.

Figure it this way:

Say you or your loved one didn’t have bipolar disorder.

But you know that flu season comes around every year, right?

So you probably do the smart thing and get your yearly flu shot, like most people.

But do you live the rest of the year in fear of getting the flu?

Does it keep you hiding inside, afraid to go outside?

Does it keep you from having a normal social life?

Does it keep you from seeing friends and family?

Does it keep you from doing the things you enjoy?

Does it keep you from making plans?

Does it keep you bound up in fear? That’s the main question.

No one ever said that you or your loved one won’t have another episode. You/they probably will, in fact.

But if you’re doing the things you need to do to manage the disorder, there’s no reason that you should not expect to live a normal, healthy, successful, productive life despite the fact that you or they have bipolar disorder.

Many, many people do.

They don’t live in fear of the disorder, and they don’t let it control their lives.

They don’t hide from the disorder, but they don’t let it make them hide from the rest of the world, either.

If they did, they would isolate at home, and isolation is a trigger to depression, and depression to a bipolar depressive episode.

And you don’t want that, do you?

What do you think about this?

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David Oliver is the author of the shocking guide “Bipolar Disorder—The REAL Silent Killer.” Click Here to get FREE Information sent via email on how and why bipolar disorder kills.