Bipolar Supporter Blog

Hi,

How are you? I am going to make this really
short today because I want this message
to be clear.

If you have a loved one who has bipolar
disorder and he/she gets violent
and beyond your control, and the police
must be called, you should tell
the police right away the person has
bipolar disorder. Ask if the person
listening to you knows what bipolar
disorder is.

If not say something like:

“Bipolar Disorder is a mental illness
that can cause a person to change his/her
moods from mania or a high to depression
or a low. When my loved one is not feeling
well, he/she can do and say things that
they normally would not. I just need you
to help me get him/her to the hospital
or treatment. I don’t you to shoot
and kill my loved one.”

Ask the police to send people who have
experience dealing with someone with a
mental illness.

Make sure when the police arrive you
are there and remind them the person
has bipolar disorder.

Keep telling them not to shoot and kill
so they think first instead of just shooting.

Sadly, someone on my list didn’t follow
these instructions and her loved one with
bipolar disorder was shot.

If you get my courses/systems at:

SUPPORTING AN ADULT?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarsupporter.com/report11

SUPPORTING A CHILD/TEEN?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarparenting.com

HAVE BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.survivebipolar.net

You notice that a number of people in
the interviews who have bipolar disorder
have been arrested. Many have said they
have no memory of what they said or did
to the police. The supporters of the people
in my interviews with my courses/systems
tell me that sometimes these loved ones
were totally out of control and without
their intervention would have been probably
shot by police.

NOTE-It’s not the police who are the problem,
it’s the person who is not stable who has
bipolar disorder who is the problem. People
get mad at the police for shooting at people
with bipolar disorder but I must say, if
you put yourself in the position of a police
person with let’s say a family and someone
runs at you with a knife screaming and yelling,
you might wind up shooting if you were a police
person.

THE KEY TO THIS IS TO GET PEOPLE WITH BIPOLAR
DISORDER WITH THE RIGHT TREATMENT

With the right treatment plan, you never will
have to be dealing with the police (probably
I guess I should never say never).

Hey I have to run.

See you tomorrow when I send the news.

Your Friend,

Dave

P.S. Check out my F.ree blog with copies of emails
that I have sent in the past and lots of great
information for you:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/supporterblog/

P.P.S Check out my F.ree podcast. Hear me give
mini seminars designed to teach you information
you can’t learn anywhere else.
http://bipolarcentral.libsyn.com

Hi,

How are you? I wanted to write you today
about a major bipolar disorder success
story. I have been getting a ton lately.

I think it’s because I have been doing
this for so long. I was reminded the other
day that it’s been almost three years. That’s
kind of amazing considering that 99% of people
that I spoke to about the idea 3 years ago
said it was impossible.

They said things like:

People would not listen to me
I am not a good writer and nobody would read it
Everyone on my list would be crazy and impossible
to deal with
I wouldn’t be able to buy advertising at a cheap
enough price to make it all work

Well this has all come a long way. About 2 years ago
someone contacted me and his wife was totally out
of control.

His wife had left him, was kind of missing but
would call. She was cheating on him with another
guy. She spent tons of money and said and did
a long list of really bad things.

This person got one of my courses about
what he should do. He then used the f.ree
consultation certificate that came with it
and sent it in. NOTE this is for NON
medical and NON legal questions because
I am NOT a doctor, lawyer, financial advisor,
professional anything, etc.

Anyway, he called and he was completely
distraught. His wife’s bipolar was destroying
him. He was going to the doctor himself
and was taking anxiety medication and medication
for depression.

He said he never ate and only worried. His
work was suffering tremendously. He said
he couldn’t sleep and needed sleeping medication.
Even though I am NOT a doctor it seemed odd
to me how many medications he was taking.

Anyway, we talked and he asked me what he
should do. I said the key is to focus on
getting her into treatment.

When I was talking to him, he was not focused.
He had no real goal. Maybe his goal was
to have his old wife back. That really wasn’t
going to cut it with me.

I told him about the get her in to treatment
goal and then other things would fall into place.

He was worried that was a bad goal. I told him
I can’t make any promises and I gave him my cell
to call because he needed a friend and my list
was way smaller back then and I had more
f.ree time.

So anyway, it took about a month for him to
get her into treatment. He probably had to try
about 12 of my 21 ways before one worked.

After she was in treatment, within the first
day, she had been brought down from her manic
high and was able to be reasoned with.

Over the months there were ups and downs
but eventually she really started to become
stable.

Then he called and I warned him of the
doomsday scenario which had just almost
happen to me.

I told him how he has to hope for the best
but plan for the worst. I told him
about putting the systems together
to prevent future episodes.

After all this time, things are going great
for him and he is really happy. He is off
all his medications.

NOTE-Again, I am NOT a doctor
remember and not recommending, diagnosing,
or making any medical suggestions only
pointing out facts.

It’s nice to get such stories. I remember
how sad he was back in the day and now
everything is going great.

I wanted to write so you hear something positive
today. There is hope and things can turn around
if you or your loved one aren’t doing well.
It just takes time. And it takes knowledge.

SUPPORTING AN ADULT?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarsupporter.com/report11

SUPPORTING A CHILD/TEEN?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarparenting.com

HAVE BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.survivebipolar.net

Your Friend,

Dave

P.S. Check out my F.ree blog with copies of emails
that I have sent in the past and lots of great
information for you:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/supporterblog/

P.P.S Check out my F.ree podcast. Hear me give
mini seminars designed to teach you information
you can’t learn anywhere else.
http://bipolarcentral.libsyn.com

How’s it going? I wanted to write you really quick
about something that I was thinking of–bipolar
triggers.

It’s strange to me how doctors, therapists,
books, etc. rarely talk about this or make
a big deal about it.

What is a bipolar trigger? Well a bipolar
trigger is something that triggers,
leads to, causes or instigates a bipolar
disorder episode.

For people with bipolar disorder, there
are things that “trigger” and episode.

With my mom, according to her and my
own observations, here are some of hers:

stress
not eating right
not exercising
not being on the right medication
no sleeping
going to Texas to see her family
getting into too many arguments
getting wrapped up in drama that involves friends

That’s just a few the list is much longer but
you can see from the above list some of the
stuff might be considered odd. Like “
going to Texas to see her family.”

You might think, “how is that a trigger?”
Well first remember the rule of why. Don’t
ask why when you no it is so.
This rule states, don’t try to figure out
what is proven to be a fact–just accept
it. Many get bogged down in trying to
figure out why something is with bipolar
disorder as opposed to just acceptance.

For example, “Why does sleep help my
loved one stay stable.” Who cares,
just help your loved one get enough
sleep. Unless you are a researcher,
why ask why?

BUT even though I just said all that,
let’s look at why Texas for my mom is
a trigger. I want to do this not to contradict
myself but to show how you may not know
why and don’t even need to but ultimately
a certain thing is very important.

Okay, Texas. Let’s look at what Texas is
for my mom. First she is from Texas, and
so is most of my family. So Texas equals
seeing family. Texas also logically equals
many bad times for my mom. Why? Well when
she was in Texas she had bipolar disorder
and she wasn’t under the right treatment
plan. Actually she didn’t have a treatment
plan so lots of bad things happen.

With that said, it’s easy to see in my
head how Texas becomes stressful in many
ways and can bring back bad memories.

Even if you don’t have bipolar disorder,
dealing with relatives is stressful.

Anyway, so if we assume Texas equals lots
of stress, and we know that stress is a bipolar
disorder trigger for my mom, we can conclude
that going to Texas can be a bipolar trigger
for my mom and lead into an episode for
her.

Now even if I didn’t know all of this or
I couldn’t figure out all the stuff that
creates stress in Texas, the data or
the results of Texas trips are clear.

According to my memory and my dad,
my mom goes into an episode AFTER coming
back from Texas most of the time.

I hope it doesn’t happen this time
but I am not worried. There is a great
plan and system in place. BUT, if the
system fails and my mom goes into an
episode, I know EXACTLY what to do
in virtually any and every case.

I have thought through all possible
outcomes and have a plan for each. It this
point, it’s a breeze for me since I have
been doing it so long. It takes no effort.

If you are new to supporting someone with
bipolar disorder, you should be excited
because it use to be a nightmare for me.
Trying to figure all the stuff out with
my mom and what to do and how to respond
if this or that happen. Now it’s really
easy.

It can be easy for you some day soon. It
won’t happen in 47 seconds but it can
happen.

SUPPORTING AN ADULT?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarsupporter.com/report11

SUPPORTING A CHILD/TEEN?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarparenting.com

HAVE BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.survivebipolar.net

I have to take off for today. Have a
great day and catch you tomorrow.

Dave

Hi,

How’s it going? Hope you have a good
Monday. Well today I wanted to talk
about something rather bad. Some
call it the “ugly truth.”

What’s that? Well here’s what it
is. When you are supporting someone
with bipolar disorder there are many
ugly truths. Here’s just a few of
them:

-There is no cure for bipolar disorder

-Bipolar can be very expensive and destroy
one’s finances

-People with bipolar disorder can go into
episodes and say and do things they normally
would not do.

Today I am going to focus on that last ugly
truth.

Here’s the deal as I see it. Tons of people
with bipolar disorder are great people to
be around and hang out with. I have lots of
friends and people who work for me with
bipolar disorder.

But like Michele Soloway who has bipolar
disorder always tells me, you have to
remember that a person with bipolar disorder
will always have bipolar disorder and could
go into an episode and say and do things
they would normally never, ever do.

For example, the Religious nun type
person that never cheats, yells, screams,
drinks alcohol or curses might start
screaming, yelling, drinking, cursing,
etc.

Why? Well it’s because bipolar disorder
is a mood disorder that affects people’s
thinking and stuff. That’s why it’s a mental
illness because it works on one’s mind. This
isn’t to say you should be afraid of people
with bipolar disorder or be worried they
will explode without any provocation.

Rather we do have to remember that it is possible
for people to go into episode and say and do
things they normally would not.

THE KEY HOWEVER IS THERE ARE PEOPLE WHO ARE
NOT BEING TREATED

The person that is out of control is the person
who is not being treated.

What does not being treated mean? It means they
are not seeing a doctor generally, or therapist.
Not taking medication at all OR not taking it
right OR they are not taking it all the time.

This leads to a disaster and the biggest ugly
truth–violence and doing extremely bad things.

Some people with bipolar disorder who are not
treated can become very violent. Or they can
do extreme things like make up huge lies, threaten
people, steal, rob, etc.

THIS IS NOT ALL PEOPLE WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER BUT
SOME.

And today’s email is going to urge you to report
this type of ugly truth and not to mask or hide
it.

GIGANTIC MISTAKE MADE BY PEOPLE

Is covering up, hiding or masking a major ugly
truth because you feel that it doesn’t represent
the person or that you think that if you report it,
they will get into trouble or reporting will make
them look really bad.

I believe this is a big mistake. There are people
that have been very violent and done bad things
and there is NO record of it. Why? Well every time
they do something a loved one never tells anyone
at all. As a result years go by and the person
never gets the right treatment and he/she starts
doing worse and worse things and eventually can
seriously hurt someone.

If you look at the bipolar news that I send out
on Fridays, you hear about people with bipolar
disorder killing people, running over people,
hurting their kids, etc. If you read the cases,
in almost every case, the judges throw the book
at them and sentence them to a long, long time
in jail.

Why? Well, well, first let me say I am NOT
a lawyer, doctor, therapist, financial advisor,
etc. Okay, now let me say that based on what I see,
the courts are not letting people with bipolar
disorder get away with doing really bad things
because they have a mental illness.

It seems judges are saying, “You know what you have,
and you did something really bad, and you will be
punished. Period.”

In almost every case that I review, or if I am
able to talk to people surrounding an incident,
the people saw for years a number of ugly truths
but never reported it. As a result, the system,
or person’s doctor, therapist never knew how
bad the person with bipolar disorder was and really
didn’t take any action to try to prevent
these terrible things.

For example, I personally know someone that
said, “my wife is not as bad as your mother.”
I hear that kind of thing a lot. People
suggest that my mom was really bad and
their loved one is not as bad.

When I questioned him, I found out this
guy’s wife is FAR WORSE than my mom. His
wife’s bipolar is totally out of control.
His wife:

-Hit him with a pot
-Cut him with an instrument and caused him to bleed
-Attacked him multiple teams
-Hits and punches him
-Calls the police on him after she attacks him and cries
-Tells his kids lies about him all the time
-Tells people around town that he is abusive and he is not
-Throws objects at him with regularity
-She drinks and doesn’t take her medication regularly

My mom was never this violent. BUT here’s the
deal. I asked the guy, have you reported this
to ANYONE but me? He said, “umm well, not really,
I don’t want to get her into trouble.”

So imagine that she is a parent and it’s obvious
he could have to get a divorce and when he heads
to court and talks about how she is a bad mother,
where will be the proof?

Also, how is the doctor suppose to do anything
if he/she doesn’t even know these ugly truths
are occurring?

Also, since she is not held accountable, the violence
and chaos is escalating each year. I told him to
fear for his life because she could do something
to him based on what he said. I highly encouraged
him to report all to the police, doctor, etc. and
speak with his lawyer and make a plan.

Anyway, he’s not the only one, there are thousands
of people on my list covering up for an out of
control loved one with bipolar disorder.

When you do this, you don’t do them any good
or yourself. Not to mention you put yourself,
your family, your friends and society at risk.

SUPPORTING AN ADULT?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarsupporter.com/report11

SUPPORTING A CHILD/TEEN?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarparenting.com

HAVE BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.survivebipolar.net

Your Friend,

Dave

P.S. Check out my F.ree blog with copies of emails
that I have sent in the past and lots of great
information for you:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/supporterblog/

P.P.S Check out my F.ree podcast. Hear me give
mini seminars designed to teach you information
you can’t learn anywhere else.
http://bipolarcentral.libsyn.com

Hi,

Yesterday I wrote you and told you I would
share one strategy to help you deal
with stress from supporting someone
with bipolar disorder.

It’s really simple and you might find
it too simple.

It’s get away and take a walk. I find
this probably one of the biggest stress
reducing things that I can do for myself.

I actually walk generally 5 days a week.
Wednesday, through Sunday. I walk first
thing in the morning.

Sometimes however I will walk off afternoon
stress so I will have two walking sessions.

Usually the second on is only 15 minutes
while the first one is 30 minutes.

I also weight train and do intense
stretching as well. I do this 6 days
a week. But take a week off every 6 to 7
weeks. I don’t want to make this complicated
for you so here’s a good plan for you.

NOTE-Before starting any exercise routine,
always check with a doctor. Also remember
I am NOT a doctor, therapist, pharmacy
worker, insurance agent, lawyer or even
a dog walker. Someone wrote me the other
day if I walk dogs for a living. I
don’t walk dogs 🙂

Anyway, if you walk 3 times a week
or better yet 5 after you get a doctor
approval, you might want to do it at night.

This way you can walk away a lot of your
bipolar caregiver stress.

I don’t know what it is, but if I am
having a terrible day, if I just walk
for like 15 to 30 minutes these things happen:

I feel better
I come up with solutions to bipolar related problems
quicker
I feel like I can be a good supporter
I am more upbeat
I don’t feel so run down

When my mom was REALLY, REALLY sick with her
bipolar disorder major episode, I wound
up not going to the gym BUT I continued
to walk.

It was through walking that I thought
of many solutions to my mom’s problems.

Actually it was one day that I was walking
that I came up with the idea on how
to find a doctor for my mom and get
them to contact us instead of us contacting
them.

They say that walking releases hormones
or something that causes an increase in
some part of your brain. I am not sure
because I don’t know about those things
but I know the bottom line is that it
works for bipolar supporters.

I will say one last thing before I take
off.

If you got any of my courses/systems

SUPPORTING AN ADULT?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarsupporter.com/report11

SUPPORTING A CHILD/TEEN?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarparenting.com

HAVE BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.survivebipolar.net

Many of the people interview stress how
important it is to take care of yourself.
Many bipolar supporters do not do this.
I didn’t do this but let me tell you, it’s
a big mistake.

If I could do it all over again, I would
take care of myself first. Today I will
not let my mom’s bipolar disorder episodes
destroy my health.

Anyway with that said, walking helps to
make sure you keep your own health in
check.

Please don’t take this suggestion lightly.
Schedule an appointment with your doctor
to get approval to start walking several
times a week and see how it start helping
you cope and deal with your loved one’s
bipolar disorder.

I am not kidding, I have taught this to
many people where I volunteer at and
they love it.

I KNOW IT’S SIMPLE but some times
the simple things are the most powerful.

I have to head to the gym speaking of walking
see you tomorrow.

Your Friend,

Dave

P.S. Check out my F.ree blog with copies of emails
that I have sent in the past and lots of great
information for you:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/supporterblog/

P.P.S Check out my F.ree podcast. Hear me give
mini seminars designed to teach you information
you can’t learn anywhere else.
http://bipolarcentral.libsyn.com

Hi,

How’s it going? I have to make it quick because
I am really behind today. I overslept. I’ve
been under a ton of stress lately.

Tomorrow I think I am going to tell you one
strategy that I use to deal with lots of
stress. Actually I will probably tell you
two.

Anyway, things have grown so fast with all
this bipolar stuff it’s hard to keep up.
Not to mention that I run 4 businesses
in total.

Yesterday was most frustrating because I
received numbers threats against me
including one person that said that I
“was working with drug companies to
medicate and destroy bipolars.”

This person suggested that the world
would be better without me and he was
going to get me.

Oh well I know the person was in an
episode because half the conversation
he liked me and the other half he
wanted to kill me.

NOTE-I get some many threats on a daily
basis, it’s amazing and really annoying.
I try not to take it personal but sure
is hard because I don’t have a personality
that loves hearing and reading threats and
just looking the other way. But this
organization sure has taught me how
to improve this skill 🙂 There
have been some people that call
and write with nice things only to
threaten the next week.

This brings up an important point
with bipolar disorder. It’s a mood
disorder that impairs someone’s
judgment when they are not stable.

So you have to be careful even with
your own loved one. People not getting
the right treatment from a good
doctor and do something bad. That something
can be violent. My mom has taken swings
at me, spit on me, punched me sort of,
thrown a phone at me, etc.

If she is not stable I always watch
her hands and make sure I can defend myself.
I NEVER assume that my mom is my mom and
would never do such a thing. Why? Well
it’s because if she is not stable I
can’t assume that her motherly instinct
will override her instability.

With that said, I was speaking to someone
that said his wife was never violent in
any bipolar disorder episodes but then in the last
couple of years has become violent.

My mom on the other hand has gone the OPPOSITE.
My mom use to yell, scream, cry TONS. And I
mean TONS. But in the last year, that happens
less and less and less.

I was talking to Michele Soloway who has
bipolar disorder and she said she is not
violent but her sister was (her sister
killer herself and had bipolar disorder), but
she noted how bipolar can change with time.

So you have to constantly watch, learn
and plan for the worst but hope for the
best. That’s why when you look at my courses
at:

SUPPORTING AN ADULT?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarsupporter.com/report11

SUPPORTING A CHILD/TEEN?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarparenting.com

HAVE BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.survivebipolar.net

You will notice that I try to cover every possible
situation. For example, the violent person, the drinking
person, the non violent person. The person who wants
to go to the doctor, doesn’t want to go. The person
who gives permission for you to talk to his/her doctor
the person that doesn’t.

I do this because a person with bipolar disorder can
change and you need to have a strategy if he/she changes
and not just say, “Man, this stinks, they weren’t suppose
to do that, they never generally did something like
that but now they did and I don’t know what to
do…this isn’t fair. What the heck???”

That’s the kind of thinking my dad has. Not so
much any more. BUT my dad still is too dependent
on me as my mom’s supporter. I am working to
stop this and shift more responsibility to him.

Anyway, I have to run and will catch you tomorrow.

Your Friend,

Dave

P.S. Check out my F.ree blog with copies of emails
that I have sent in the past and lots of great
information for you:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/supporterblog/

P.P.S Check out my F.ree podcast. Hear me give
mini seminars designed to teach you information
you can’t learn anywhere else.
http://bipolarcentral.libsyn.com

Here is the current Bipolar Disorder news. There
is some really interesting stuff. It costs me a lot
of money to put it together so I URGE you to read
it.

Visit:

http://www.bipolarcentral.com/bipolarnews331

There’s some really interesting news stories this week.
Take a look at them. Also, write me some feedback by
visiting my blog below.

Here are some of the headlines:

Clinical Trials Update: June 20, 2007

Paxil Mixed with Depression

Excessive gaming, a mental illness?

Mental health unit for new mums opened

Special Report: Bipolar Disorder

For these stories and more, please visit:

http://www.bipolarcentral.com/bipolarnews331

My Resources For Bipolar:

Quickly And Easily Explain Bipolar To People
Go here for more information.
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/explainingbipolar

Need Money Because Of Bipolar Disorder?
Go here for more information
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/bipolarbusiness

Dating Someone With Bipolar?
Go here for more information
http://www.BipolarCentral.com/bipolardating

Want To Marry Someone Who Has Bipolar?
Go here for more information
http://www.BipolarCentral.com/bipolarmarriage/

Need Affordable Health Insurance When Dealing With Bipolar Disorder?
Go here for more information
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/insuranceguide/

Problems With Drugs, Alcohol And Addiction?
Go here for more information
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/bipolaraddiction/

Trying To PREVENT A Divorce From Someone With Bipolar Disorder?
Go here for more information:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/bipolardivorce

Your Friend,

Dave

Hi,

How’s it going? I hope it’s going well for you.
Yesterday I took some time to speak to many people
on the phone with various questions.

It’s proving to be very hard for me
lately because I am getting sometimes
40 calls in a day.

Andrea H, is helping return calls but
ultimately, although I never wanted to
do this. I am going to have to turn all
bipolar disorder calls over to a call center.

It’s just not possible to answer up to 40 calls
in a day.

Anyway, let’s talk about one thing today that’s
important based on a call that I got from
someone interested in some of my bipolar
disorder material.

One woman called and she was
trying to PREVENT a divorce from
her husband. Her husband has bipolar
disorder and is not stable and demanding
a divorce.

She wants to prevent it. She is getting
my prevent a divorce course at
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/bipolardivorce

She was a
really nice person and she asked me something
like, “what’s the one thing that I can
do right now that can turn it all around?”
Something like that.

I told her I generally have found that
there is really never any one thing that
works with everyone who has bipolar disorder.

There are generally multiple strategies for
the same common goal and you have to try
different ones.

For my own mom, a bipolar supporter strategy
that worked last time for a certain issue
may not work the next time. It’s really annoying
but that’s the way it is. Sorry.

On that note, I must say, there are a lot of things
that are REALLY annoying about having to support
someone with bipolar disorder. But that’s the hand
that we were dealt and we have to make the best
of it.

It’s not that the people with bipolar disorder
are annoying it’s just the illness is. You have
to SEPARATE the two. So there’s a person and then
the person has bipolar disorder. The bipolar
disorder is the annoying part.

Much like Cancer is annoying. Or diabetes is
annoying. Or a bad back is SUPER ANNOYING. And
I have been having major problems with my
back. I was in so much pain that I tried a
home remedy of laying on a baseball and
taking a stick and trying to push up the
knot that I wound up missing the spot that
hurt and hurting another spot.

Which was good in one way because I hurt
myself more than the original pain. So I
forgot about the first spot and only
felt the pain of the second spot. 🙂

BUT the lesson of this is, go to a real
doctor instead home remedies when the situation
is real. Just like with bipolar disorder,
don’t try to treat yourself or adjust
your medications on your own. See
your doctor.

I am following my own advice 🙂

SUPPORTING AN ADULT?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarsupporter.com/report11

SUPPORTING A CHILD/TEEN?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarparenting.com

HAVE BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.survivebipolar.net

So remember two things today. There
isn’t one strategy that works for everyone
for everything related to bipolar disorder.
And if your loved one is having problems
with his/her bipolar disorder, it’s the
doctor that will adjust treatment not
you or your loved one.

Your Friend,

Dave

P.S. Check out my F.ree blog with copies of emails
that I have sent in the past and lots of great
information for you:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/supporterblog/

P.P.S Check out my F.ree podcast. Hear me give
mini seminars designed to teach you information
you can’t learn anywhere else.
http://bipolarcentral.libsyn.com

Hi,

How’s it going? I had a quick story that
I wanted to share with you that will
be really important to you if you have
bipolar disorder OR if you are supporting
someone with bipolar disorder.

Yesterday after I took several phone calls
related to all my businesses that I have,
I had to go to a business meeting.

Let me tell you, it’s far. It’s almost in
New York which is far from me. And there’s
traffic. And the closer you get to New York
the more mean the drivers are. So I wasn’t
looking forward to it.

Well some how, amazingly, I got there
on time even generally there is so much
traffic you just can’t leave early enough.

So I got to the meeting, was listening and
doing the meeting thing. HOURS went by.
The meeting was suppose to be only 2 hours
long.

I didn’t have my cell phone on and I leaned
over to a guy and looked at his watch I thought
it said 9:15pm. I was like, “What the heck,
it’s time to go.”

So I kept hearing, “Oh, and another thing.
Oh and one more thing. Isn’t this meeting
great, I know it was a little long
but it’s great isn’t it?”

I was dying in my chair. First it’s hard
for me to sit still for this long to
begin with. Secondly I get bored kind
of fast and I have so many things to do.

In the meeting that was NOT related to
bipolar disorder, I had already outlined
my goals for all the mental health stuff
for 2009, outlined multiple interviews
I was going to do, new article ideas,
a new way to handle my phone calls, etc.

So I did get a lot done in the time
plus I listened to what was going on. I really
did. I swear :).

Okay, so at like 9:40pm, I lean next to the
guy and say, “Hey, this is way longer
than 2 hours and it’s almost 3 and 1/2 hours
and when’s this going to be done? I have
to eat every 2.5 hours and I am starting
to feel really bad and sick.”

NOTE-I body build non competitively and
I do eat ever 2.5 hours when I am awake and
if I don’t, I start to feel really sick. I can
probably pass out if I hit the 5 hour mark
and I get really weak and I can’t even think
so I was being totally serious.

Anyway, the guy leans over to me and says:
“Don’t worry about it, you know a guy once
didn’t eat for a whole year?”

I was like “What the heck? Just because
some moron supposedly didn’t eat for a whole
year I am suppose to be happy not eating
when I am suppose to and then I was thinking
who cares about the guy that didn’t eat
for a whole year? Am I the guy who didn’t
eat for a whole year? Is that a true
story.”

I was super mad. And started to leave
and then the meeting was over and then it
hit me…

The Bipolar Disorder Statistical Outliner

What’s that? Well when you look at mathematical
averages there is something called the
Statistical Outliner.

This is something that falls way outside
of the average and is on the outlining
areas of a given group.

For example, most people eat daily, but there’s
a man that eat or ate once a year. He is on the
OUTSIDE of the averages of normal people.

How does this relate to bipolar? Good question.

Here’s how it does. There are certain things
that are done to support someone with
bipolar disorder or if you have it yourself.

We could argue that you could call them “bipolar
disorder best practices.” Best practices is a term
used to define things that are generally proven
to work best for a given objective.

So let’s look at bipolar disorder and best practices.
Generally it’s things like, find a great doctor,
go to him/her regularly, find a great therapist,
go to him/her regularly, take medication, take it
like you are suppose to, exercise, eat right,
don’t have too much stress in your life, protect
your finances, etc.

Those are all things that are considered best practices?
That makes sense?

Now the statistical outliner would be like a person
that you found who is stable who does NOT do
or engage in best practices. This person doesn’t
take medication, doesn’t see a doctor, does
illegal drugs, drinks all night long, is stressed
a ton, eats junk food, etc.

This one out a million or 10 million would be stable
but he/she is NOT the norm and should not be modeled.

For example, with kids, you encourage them to go
to college or at least high school? Why because going
to high school and college is best practices with
getting a good job right? Well there is probably at least
one person who dropped out of the 4th grade and is a
multi millionaire.

Now would you encourage your kid to drop out of the
4th grade and skip all the rest of the grades and high
school and college? Of course not. Why? Because you
know that statically speaking your kid will not
do well financially in life.

It’s the same thing with bipolar disorder, you have
to model best practices and average of people who do
well, NOT look to the statistical outliner and follow
him/her.

Occasionally I go to a support group meeting and hear
that there is such and such a person that does NOTHING
that makes any sense and the person is doing great.
99% of the time I believe it’s a lie but 1% I think
it’s true but I always say the same thing “So what?
You think I am going to have my mom do that kind of thing
with her bipolar disorder, you’re crazy.”

This is a VERY important concept that I hope makes
sense to you. Bottom line is you have to follow
what works for most people with bipolar disorder
whether you are a supporter or a person with
bipolar disorder not follow things that work for
1 out 25 million people. And be careful of people
that tell you stories of people who are doing
well bipolar disorder or being a supporter
of someone with bipolar disorder which makes
no sense at all and seems to deviate from
normal things.

If you listen to all my interviews in all my courses
I only let people talk about things that are best
practices not random luck of the draw statistical outliner
type of strategies. That’s no good to regular and
average people like I am and I think you are as well.

SUPPORTING AN ADULT?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarsupporter.com/report11

SUPPORTING A CHILD/TEEN?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarparenting.com

HAVE BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.survivebipolar.net

Your Friend,

Dave

P.S. Check out my F.ree blog with copies of emails
that I have sent in the past and lots of great
information for you:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/supporterblog/

P.P.S Check out my F.ree podcast. Hear me give
mini seminars designed to teach you information
you can’t learn anywhere else.
http://bipolarcentral.libsyn.com

Hi,

How’s it going? First, I would like to welcome
4000 new subscribers to my mailing list. That’s
about how many have subscribed over the last
3 days or so.

Welcome.

Secondly, today I wanted to talk about
an VERY IMPORTANT concept about bipolar disorder
that my dad, mom and many other still
struggle with. It was something that I was
reminded this past weekend when I went
to the Strongman Competition to see
my friend compete.

If you are new to my list, let me get
you up to speed. This Saturday my friend
competed in a Strongman Competition. That’s
a competition where you list all kinds of
heavy objects and they time you and/or see
how many things you can lift. This
has nothing to do with bipolar disorder
BUT while I was there, I was reminded
of a VERY important lesson related to
bipolar disorder.

I am going to share it with you today.
Here’s how I was reminded.

So when I went to the competition,
there were many people. It was like
100 degrees and I was super hot. I
did however bring food and lots of
water.

As I walked around and looked for my
friend when I got there, I noticed
there were HUGE people. I mean HUGE.
Some people were at least 350 pounds
or more. There were woman there as well.
Some of them were really big or smaller
but you could obviously tell they were
really strong.

Anyway, I found my friend and spoke with
him. I didn’t want to bother him because
he was “in the zone” preparing for his
first even which was pressing tires attached
to a truck axel.

DON’T WORRY THERE IS A LESSON ON BIPOLAR DISORDER
COMING SOON

I also found my friend’s wife and family and
I spoke to them for a while. Then I decided
to go and talk to people and strike up a competition
and see what people say how they got so strong.

I met one of the world’s strongest men and he
is able to dead lift 900 pounds 3 times. Which
is a huge accomplishment. I met other World
Record Holders for various events.

I started to ask people, “Hey is it technique,
strength, training, that makes you so strong?”

I thought the strongmen wouldn’t want to talk
to me and not reveal their secrets but I was
happy to see they would talk and this
is where I was reminded of a HUGE lesson
that is related to bipolar disorder.

One guy said to me, “You have to train,
practice, I sacrifice a lot and I want
to be number one. There’s a lot of stuff
that I have to do to be good at this.”

Another guy said to me, “I had to stop
power lifting and just focus on strongman
because you can’t do both.”

I another person said, “I had to stop body
building and just focus on strongman. Body
builders try this and get smoked because
it’s much different.”

NOTE-Smoked means, hmm how do I describe
it, let’s say it’s slang for beat really
badly.

Person after person basically was saying
if you want to be good at strongman competitions
you have to focus, train, sacrifice and probably
have to forget other things you may be doing
that interferes with it like other sports
or training you may be doing like body building,
power lifting, and certain kinds of exercise.

For example, you shouldn’t run a lot of long
distances when you are a strongman, it’s not
good for you. You should play basketball
either according to many.

WHAT’S THIS HAVE TO DO WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?

It has a ton to do with bipolar disorder. Nobody
had bipolar disorder there but they did reveal
a strategy and philosophy what is so important
to coping and dealing with bipolar disorder.

That is, you and your loved one will have to make
choices when it comes to bipolar disorder. Some
choices you make will help, others will make
bipolar episodes more frequent and often.

Many times, sacrifices will have to be made.
Let me explain. Okay, when my mom was first
coming out of her episode, I began to look
at what she had been doing in the past that
may have triggered her bipolar episode.

There’s a whole long list of things
but one thing in particular was really problematic
and I saw it would have to go–meaning if she
wanted to maintain stability, she would not be
able to do this.

What is it? It’s work full time, and baby
sit for my brother’s kids almost full time.

When I began to investigate what had happened
prior to my mom getting into an episode I found
she was getting up at 5:30am in the morning
and then going to work and then immediately going
to my brother’s house to baby sit for hours
and then driving home. It was a 50 minute to
his house one way.

Based on common sense and my talks with multiple
doctors, therapists and people with bipolar disorder
my mom was doing too much and the stress she was
putting herself under was acting a trigger
for her bipolar disorder.

NOW, when I told my mom, I highly recommended no
more baby sitting she was saying how in order
to be a good grandmother she had to baby sit
and also my brother was kind of demanding it.

I told her that I would handle my brother no
problem but I said, and I will never forget

“MOM YOU HAVE CHOICES TO MAKE, EITHER YOU
WILL CHOICE THINGS THAT HELP YOU BE STABLE
OR YOU WON’T”

I wasn’t screaming at her but very firm. She
actually thought about it and totally agreed.
I said, if you go in and out of episodes
what good will you be as a grandmother
anyway.

And I suggested that it was almost abusive for
my brother to demand someone drive almost 2 hours
a day 5 and 6 days a week to baby sit. I said,
“What the heck, Stephen is loaded with money
he can go and pay for 3 baby sitters.”

My brother works on Wall Street so he has
the money AND as a side note, he didn’t
contribute one dime of money to any of my mom’s
bills when they were raining down on her and my
myself.

So anyway, my mom stopped the baby sitting,
stopped working full time and started doing things
that me, her, her doctor and therapist all thought
were good ideas. Over time, we saw what should
be added and what should be subtracted.

Meaning over a year, we saw that certain
activities had to go and certain ones had to
stay. For example, my mom has to exercise
regularly, if not she is more likely to
go into a bipolar episode. My mom has to
avoid foods with lots of sugar or it will possibly
trigger a bipolar disorder episode.

RECENTLY, my mom’s doctor says she can’t
watch TV beyond, and I think it’s 8:00pm
any more. This is just recent.

So my mom, like the strongman, has choices
to make based on her goals. She could not
exercise, eat lots of food with sugar,
watch TV all night long but then she will
not hit her goal of being stable. So like
the strongman, my mom has a goal and there’s
sacrifices that will have to be made.

This is such an important point to learn
and understand.

And if you are supporting someone with
bipolar disorder, there are many choices
you will have to make that either work
for or against your loved one with bipolar
disorder.

For example, let’s say that you are married
to someone with bipolar disorder and you
know that person has to be in bed by 10:00pm,
then you should NOT pressure them to go to things
that will mean they can’t go to bed at that time.

You probably should even bring them up. If you can
go out to a party and it’s too late, how about
you simply don’t go and do something else or
simply leave early. It’s things like this
and others that you will have to choice
if you are a supporter.

If you are a supporter and married to someone
you may NOT be able to take that job that moves
you across the country because your loved one
has a great support system in place and you don’t
want to mess it up? Is this fair? I don’t know
but this is what needs to be done.

Well I have to take off for the day. Have
a great day and hang in there.

SUPPORTING AN ADULT?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarsupporter.com/report11

SUPPORTING A CHILD/TEEN?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarparenting.com

HAVE BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.survivebipolar.net

Your Friend,

Dave

P.S. Check out my F.ree blog with copies of emails
that I have sent in the past and lots of great
information for you:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/supporterblog/

P.P.S Check out my F.ree podcast. Hear me give
mini seminars designed to teach you information
you can’t learn anywhere else.
http://bipolarcentral.libsyn.com