Bipolar Supporter Blog

Hi,

How’s it going?

Happy Thanksgiving if you celebrate it. If you don’t know what Thanksgiving is, type it into google.com and learn about it.

Don’t laugh we now have tens of thousands of international readers that might not know what the holiday is.

Anyway, I have to get ready to do some cardio outside and then head over to my parents house later on after I do some work. YES, I have to work on Thanksgiving. I have a lot of great projects I am working on that you are going to like.

Okay, I was talking to a woman the other day who was telling me she had just been in a bipolar episode.

I told her, “I’m sorry to hear that.”

She said, “Don’t be sorry. With every episode I have, I learn, and I prevent the same thing from happening the next time, and it gets easier to handle episodes.”

I thought, what a great attitude!

And then I thought about the truth in what she said – About how she learned from each episode.

Think back to when you were a kid… You had to crawl before you could learn to walk, right?

And you couldn’t learn to read before you learned your ABC’s.

Now think back to when you were a little older and got a little popular, but you had to do it by making one friend at a time, didn’t you?

And in high school, you didn’t get your diploma overnight, did you?

Each lesson built on the one before it.

Each grade built on the grade before that.

Then later you got married (if you are).

You didn’t instantly know how to be a good husband or wife.

You had learned it from all the relationships you had before you got married.

You learned what to do and what not to do.

Now think of your life lessons…

Your choices and decisions…

Your mistakes and failures…

And how each success, each accomplishment, everything you’ve gotten, was based on all of that.

If you’d never failed, you wouldn’t have learned how to succeed.

If you hadn’t made bad choices, you wouldn’t learned how to make good ones.

Now think of what that woman said to me the other day about her episodes, and how she learned from them.

In my courses/systems, when I talk about episodes, I tell you that you have to take responsibility for what happens during those episodes.

SUPPORTING AN ADULT WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarsupporter.com/report11

SUPPORTING A CHILD/TEEN WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarparenting.com

HAVE BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.survivebipolar.net
That’s exactly what this woman was saying.

She not only took responsibility, but she used the experience as an opportunity to learn and to grow.

To turn failure into success.

To turn bad choices into good ones.

To not make the same mistakes again.

“To prevent the same thing from happening the next time,” is the way she put it.

And she had a positive attitude about the whole experience, that’s what I admire the most.

We can all learn a lot from the things this woman said.

I’m not saying that going through episodes (or life) is easy.

But if each time you learn something from them, like she said, “it gets easier to handle episodes.”

FIND OUT WHAT PEOPLE ARE SAYING ABOUT ME
Visit: http://www.bipolarcentral.com/testimonials

David Oliver is the author of the shocking guide “Bipolar Disorder—The REAL Silent Killer.” Click Here to get FREE Information sent via email on how and why bipolar disorder kills.

Hi,

Hope you’re having a great day!

Since my dad had a stroke, the other week, I was talking to him about what his experience was in the waiting room.

Then I was remembering all my experiences waiting in waiting rooms.

Having bipolar disorder, there are several appointments you have to attend to regularly, such as:

· Doctors
· Psychiatrist
· Therapist
· Support group
· (among others)

Especially for supporters, who don’t necessarily go into the actual appointment with their loved one.

So, much of your time is spent doing what?

WAITING!

Sometimes it’s because you’re early for your appointment, sometimes it’s because the doctor (or whoever) is running behind schedule, or sometimes it’s for other reasons (like if you’re a supporter, you have to wait for your loved one).

Getting frustrated and impatient will get you nowhere. And it may just stress you out, stress that you don’t need.

In fact, it can make matters worse – it can make you forget what you wanted to ask the doctor, or what you wanted to bring up in your therapy session.

In my courses/system, I talk about how important productivity is:

SUPPORTING AN ADULT WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarsupporter.com/report11

SUPPORTING A CHILD/TEEN WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarparenting.com

HAVE BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.survivebipolar.net

Instead of being irritable and unhappy during times of waiting in those waiting rooms, wouldn’t you rather be productive instead?

Here are some helpful hints:

· Prepare ahead of time, and bring something with you to do.

· Read a book.

· Read a magazine in the waiting room (some of them have some good articles on how to take care of your health)

· Sew, knit, crochet, cross-stitch, embroider, or quilt

· Make a list of questions to ask the doctor

· Make a list of issues to discuss with the Therapist

· Make a To-Do List

· Write a letter (catch up on correspondence)

· Speak to other patients who are also waiting

· Do crossword or word search puzzles

· Some offices will allow you to use cell phones (others won’t, however)

· Read the newspaper

· Write in your journal

· Bring a friend with you to keep you company

Whatever you do, WAITING time does not have to be WASTED time!

FIND OUT WHAT PEOPLE ARE SAYING ABOUT ME
Visit: http://www.bipolarcentral.com/testimonials

David Oliver is the author of the shocking guide “Bipolar Disorder—The REAL Silent Killer.” Click Here to get FREE Information sent via email on how and why bipolar disorder kills.

Hi,

How’s it going today?

I was having a bad day the other day, (I’m sure you can relate, right).

The kind of day where nothing seems to go right?

And I have to admit, I was getting more frustrated and irritated as the day went on.

Well, I went to the store, and at the check-out, the clerk seemed to be as frustrated as me, and that didn’t make things any better. Even my order didn’t go right.

I just gave this long, sort of loud, big sigh. And then I heard this little old lady’s voice behind me in the check-out line say:

“You know, you don’t have to be that way. You can start your day over any time you want to.”

Well, that sure got MY curiosity up!

What could she have been talking about?

I was sure I didn’t know this woman, had never seen her before in my life! So she couldn’t know me, or what was going on in my life, or even why I was so frustrated!

So, of course, HER order went just fine, and she was out of the store quickly, and we kind of caught up in the parking lot, and I asked her what she meant by how I could start my day over any time I wanted to.

She told me that she used to get irritated and frustrated pretty easily.

“In fact,” she said, “I was so full of stress in a line one day, just like you were today, and someone told me those very same words!”

I didn’t want to be rude to her, and at first I really didn’t get what she was saying, but then I thought about it.

The concept is really simple.

Instead of waiting until you’re at your boiling point, after hours of frustration and irritation (and needless stress)…

At the beginning, when you FIRST start to feel that way, you stop yourself, and you simply… right then and there… “start your day over again.”

In other words, you let go of the stress, and all the other negative emotions you’re feeling.

In my courses/systems, I talk about how stress- reduction techniques can be part of a successful treatment program in managing bipolar disorder:

SUPPORTING AN ADULT WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarsupporter.com/report11

SUPPORTING A CHILD/TEEN WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarparenting.com

HAVE BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.survivebipolar.net
You can do this as often as you need to.

Whether it’s morning or evening.

Whether it’s twice a day or 10 times a day.

Whether you’re by yourself or in a crowd.

Whether you have bipolar disorder or you’re a supporter to a loved one with the disorder.

We live in a world full of stress.

Any stress reduction technique that will help us manage that stress can only help us.

So the next time you feel irritable, impatient, frustrated, stressed, or any other negative emotion, remember:

“You can start your day over any time you want to!” FIND OUT WHAT PEOPLE ARE SAYING ABOUT ME
Visit: http://www.bipolarcentral.com/testimonials

David Oliver is the author of the shocking guide “Bipolar Disorder—The REAL Silent Killer.” Click Here to get FREE Information sent via email on how and why bipolar disorder kills.

Hi,

I hope your day is going well.

You know, many people write to me and tell me how they manage their bipolar disorder.

The ones that manage it the best use systems, or routines.

You can help your loved one by helping them find a routine that works best for them and then helping them stick to it. You can even share some of these routines.

I’ll show you an example:

Bob and Sue are married. He has bipolar disorder, but she doesn’t. However, she does take pills for other things she has.

Every day, they have a routine. When Sue takes her pills, she reminds Bob to take his pills, too.

This helps Bob to be compliant with his medication.

It’s easy for Sue to remember to do this, because she always takes her pills with breakfast.

So there’s another advantage to this routine.

It encourages them both to eat a good, healthy breakfast, and to spend some quality time together each morning.

Here’s another example:

Margaret has bipolar disorder, and her doctor has told her that she needs to exercise as part of her treatment plan. But Margaret hates to exercise.

Margaret’s husband, George, doesn’t have bipolar disorder, but as a good supporter, he agreed to walk with her every evening for an hour to help her manage her disorder.

This has become a routine for them. In my courses/systems below, I talk about how important routines are to management of bipolar disorder, and how to implement them into a system:

SUPPORTING AN ADULT WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarsupporter.com/report11

SUPPORTING A CHILD/TEEN WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarparenting.com

HAVE BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.survivebipolar.net
It’s important, as well, that your loved one get the right amount of sleep each night. Going to bed at the same time every night should become a routine for your loved one.

If you add this to your routine as well, it will help them stick to theirs.

Cooking dinner together can be a great way to learn to eat dinner at the same time every night so that dinnertime becomes part of your loved one’s routine as well.

It’s important that your loved one has routines, as these are a way to help keep them stable.

There are many things that they can do by themselves, and those things you should let them do. For example, you wouldn’t want to dress or groom them. If you did, they would see this as babying them.

But other routines, especially those where they need a little encouragement (like sticking to an exercise routine), they may welcome your help with.

Medications are a good example, as it can be difficult sometimes to remember when to take your medications.

Associating taking their medication with another routine is a good way to remember to take them. Such as with their morning coffee. Or when a certain TV show comes on. Or when they normally read the paper.

The best routines are ones you can share with them, as it can bring you closer together.

It will help to remind them that they are not fighting this disorder by themselves.

It will show them what a good supporter you are.

And since you are so close to their normal routines, it will help you to notice when something is not right with them. It may have to do with something upset in one of their routines (for example, they are not getting

enough sleep). In these ways, you can help them to manage their disorder, be healthier in general, and be more stable.

You will also reap the benefits of having a loser relationship with your loved one.

FIND OUT WHAT PEOPLE ARE SAYING ABOUT ME
Visit: http://www.bipolarcentral.com/testimonials

David Oliver is the author of the shocking guide “Bipolar Disorder—The REAL Silent Killer.” Click Here to get FREE Information sent via email on how and why bipolar disorder kills.

Hi,

Hope this day is going well for you.

Well my dad is out of the hospital. His blood pressure is still really high but thinks are looking good. My mom is doing well now as well.

I have had a ton of problems recently. If you read my past few blog posts you know that I have had people have to resign due to PHYSICAL illnesses, my dad, my mom, my friends, etc.

I am going hiking today to relieve SOME of my stress : )

Okay, I was talking to someone the other day, and this person was complaining about her bipolar disorder.

I asked, “What’s the problem?”

She said, “Everything.”

I said, “Do you have alligators in your front yard?”

And she was like, “Huh?”

So I asked again, “Do you have alligators in your front yard?”

She said, “Umm…no. Are you ok?”

I said, “Absolutely. You just said everything was wrong, so I wanted to see if that was one of your problems.”

I asked her numerous questions, all centering around if she had clearly identified her problems and if she was thinking of solutions.

She did not.

So she really had no clearly defined problems.

She was just complaining about everything in general.

Guess what?

If you don’ have clearly defined problems, do you know what happens?

Take a guess, and then scroll down for the answer.

NO CHEATING!

Keep scrolling…

Ok. Here’s the answer:

You will never have a solution to any of your problems.

If you don’t have a clearly defined problem, you can’t have a clearly defined solution.

It’s that simple. Not easy, but simple.

In my courses/systems below, I talk about problem-solving and how to come up with solutions to your problems:

SUPPORTING AN ADULT WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?

Visit:

http://www.bipolarsupporter.com/report11

SUPPORTING A CHILD/TEEN WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?

Visit:

http://www.bipolarparenting.com

HAVE BIPOLAR DISORDER?

Visit:

http://www.survivebipolar.net

So, it sounds simple enough, but like I said, it’s not easy.

So let’s tackle this one step at a time.

Obviously, you don’t have alligators in your yard (at least I hope you don’t).

So let’s stick to bipolar disorder.

What if you’re frustrated with your loved one?

Now that’s not a clearly defined problem. That’s just a feeling.

Look at it this way —

Try to get away from feelings, and be more objective.

What’s the REAL problem?

What are you frustrated ABOUT?

Then make a list of the things that frustrate you about your loved one.

For example:

1. He won’t take his medication.

2. He keeps missing his appointments.

3. He won’t go to his support group.

4. He doesn’t listen to me.

5. He thinks I’m an idiot.

6. He doesn’t help around the house.

7. He doesn’t help with the children.

8. He feels sorry for himself.

9. He won’t go to family functions.

10. He sleeps too much.

Now you’ve got something to work with.

You’ve identified some clear problems.

Not all of them are clear problems, though.

So then eliminate those things you can’t do anything about.

Look at your list again.

Look at #5 (“He thinks I’m an idiot.”)

How do you know he thinks that? You’re not a mind reader, you don’t know what he’s thinking. This is a feeling, not a real problem. If it were a clearly defined problem, there would be a solution to it.

So you eliminate #5.

But look at #4 (“He doesn’t listen to me.”)

This is a clearly defined problem, because it indicates a breakdown in communication. Communication is very important in a relationship with your loved one with bipolar disorder.

You may be feeling like they don’t listen to you, but they may feel like they are. Still, it means that you aren’t communicating, and that indicates a problem.

Clearly defined problems have clearly defined solutions.

So once you have found a clearly defined problem, you look for a solution.

What if you were to sit down with your loved one and say that you feel like they don’t listen to what you have to say?

If you clearly define the problem as they are ignoring you, say that.

If you feel like they don’t turn away from the TV when you talk, say that.

If you feel like they don’t respect your thoughts and opinions, say that.

But be very clear about what you think the problem is.

Remember, the more clearly defined the problem, the better the solution.

Now let’s look at #6 (“He won’t help around the house.”)

Clearly defined problem. Solution?

Talk to him about it, suggesting that maybe you can divide up the chores.

Are you getting the idea?

Now here’s a real important one. #1 (“He won’t take his medication.”)

First of all, and this is a real important point, you can’t make someone do something they don’t want to do.

However, you can express your feelings to them, and you can do other things.

You can remind them how important it is for them to take their medication in order to get better.

You can tell them you’ve read the statistics (1 out of 5 unmedicated people with bipolar disorder will kill themselves).

You can tell them that you’re worried about them.

You can tell them that you want them to get better.

You can call their doctor, psychiatrist, and/or therapist and tell them that your loved one isn’t taking their medication.

You see? These are solutions to a clearly defined problem.

Then, go back through your list and look for other clearly defined problems.

So first, you make a list of your problems.

Then you eliminate those things that aren’t clearly defined problems.

Take one clearly defined problem at a time and work on solutions for that problem.

When you leave out feelings and get to a clearly defined problem (that is, you think with your head instead of your emotions)…

You can find real solutions to real problems.

What do you think?

Try this method and let me know how you do with it.

FIND OUT WHAT PEOPLE ARE SAYING ABOUT ME

Visit: http://www.bipolarcentral.com/testimonials

David Oliver is the author of the shocking guide “Bipolar Disorder—The REAL Silent Killer.” Click Here to get FREE Information sent via email on how and why bipolar disorder kills.

Hi,

How’s it going?

I hope you are doing well.

Sorry again the news is coming out on Saturday. It will be back to the normal schedule next Friday.

Again, very sorry.

Here is today’s news.

To read this week’s news visit:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/bipolarnews405

Rejected Author Finds Audience in Spouses of Bipolar Husbands and Wives Online
DO> Great story, what do you think?

New drugs approved for Australians
DO> Interesting, what do you think.

Through website, patients creating own drug studies
DO> What do you think of this?

Support grows for parents of children with mental health needs
DO> This is really needed.

For these stories and more, please visit:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/bipolarnews405

==>Help with ALL aspects of bipolar disorder<<==

Check out all my resources, programs and information for all aspects of bipolar disorder by visiting:

http://www.bipolarcentral.com/catalog.asp

David Oliver is the author of the shocking guide “Bipolar Disorder—The REAL Silent Killer.” Click Here to get FREE Information sent via email on how and why bipolar disorder kills.

Hi,

Hope your day is going well.

Okay, there is no bipolar news today. Here’s what happen. We had a person have to resign for serious medical problems that were NRTB (not related to bipolar).

I do not actually post the news on the internet. I don’t know HTML and that kind of thing.

I am sitting here looking for the news but it’s not up. I am not sure why.

I have to call the person. I guess she had trouble but it doesn’t make me happy that I wasn’t notified let’s say yesterday or last night.

Anyway sorry. I am REALLY annoyed by this.

I will have it posted hopefully tomorrow.

I want to talk to you about something today.

It’s about tweaking your treatment plan.

You know I work out a lot, right?

Well, sometimes I have to “change up” (or “tweak”) my routine some, or I would get bored with it, and then I probably wouldn’t

work out as much as I do.

This is why I work in about 9 different libraries and do cardio in many different parks.

Well, this is sort of like that, only with your treatment plan.

I mean, obviously, there are some things you just can’t change (unless they aren’t working).

Your medication, as long as it’s working fine, is something you just shouldn’t mess with. If you are having problems with it, or the side effects are bothering you, that’s something you should tell your doctor about.

That’s NOT what I’m talking about here. Therapy is another part of your treatment plan that is very, very important.

If you’re happy with your therapist, fantastic!

But if you’ve been with them for a long time and you don’t feel you’re getting anything out of therapy any more, or you just feel like you’re going out of habit more than anything else, then that’s something you may want to tweak.

First, talk to your therapist. Tell them how you feel. If you’re supposed to be with that therapist, then maybe you just need a tweak in your sessions (or go down to less sessions).

If you’re not supposed to be with that therapist any more, then you may have to think about switching therapists. Again, this is something you should discuss with them. If this is what you decide to do, it would be good to have them on your side, as they may be able to give you a referral.

In my courses/systems below, I go over all the parts that make up a comprehensive treatment plan. Medication and therapy are just two of the parts:

SUPPORTING AN ADULT WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?

Visit:

http://www.bipolarsupporter.com/report11

SUPPORTING A CHILD/TEEN WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?

Visit:

http://www.bipolarparenting.com

HAVE BIPOLAR DISORDER?

Visit:

http://www.survivebipolar.net

Exercise should be part of your treatment regimen, but if, like me, you get bored with the type of exercise you’re doing, you may want to tweak your routine. If you’ve been walking, try swimming instead (or the opposite). If you’ve been doing free weights, try the machines instead (or the opposite). There are many options for exercise programs.

If you’ve been exercising at home, consider joining a gym or use free programs you may find in your area. If you’ve been exercising alone, try working out with a friend.

You should be eating a healthy diet as part of your treatment regiment, but maybe it’s gotten too bland, and could use some tweaking. Try some different cooking ideas. Buy a low-fat cookbook and try some new recipes.

Look online for foods you like and make meals using those foods. Meals shouldn’t be boring. If you’ve been eating 3 regular meals a day, try tweaking that to 6 smaller meals a day.

And be flexible! Instead of thinking of it as “dieting,” (which everyone hates and is too restrictive), eat what you want, just in smaller portions, while being health conscious, and if every once in awhile you want that small bite of a candy bar, allow yourself that luxury! (That way, you won’t want to eat that whole cake later on and feel like a big “cheater”!)

Sleep is still so very important, but can still be tweaked if you need to. If you decided on a 9:00 bedtime but still find yourself up and tossing and turning at 10 pm, just change your bedtime to 10:00 and tweak your morning rise time.

As long as you are still getting 8-9 hours of good sleep every night, the hours you go to bed and rise aren’t as important. Go to bed and rise according to what works for you and YOUR body’s internal clock.

Enjoyment is an important part of everyone’s life (bipolar or not). If you aren’t having enough fun in your life, perhaps that’s an area that needs to be tweaked. Now, don’t go so far as to get manic or anything, but make sure you include enjoyment as part of your treatment regimen. Remember not to neglect your supporter, either, as that is very important.

“Date Nights” are a great way to keep your relationship with your supporter close and let them know how much you appreciate what they do for you. (Maybe this is an area you need to tweak? Intimacy is very important.)

Make sure you are taking care of your mental health – things  like stress reduction techniques and relaxation exercises are also important in management of bipolar disorder. If you have been slacking off in these areas, maybe these are a couple of those areas that need to be tweaked.

Get back to basics. Maybe you’ve gotten away from some of those things that worked in the beginning, but that you stopped doing. You may want to go back to doing those things.

Maintaining a good treatment plan is crucial for good management of bipolar disorder.

Sometimes all it takes is some tweaking!

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David Oliver is the author of the shocking guide “Bipolar Disorder—The REAL Silent Killer.” Click Here to get FREE Information sent via email on how and why bipolar disorder kills.

Hi,

How’s it going?

Thanks to everyone for wishing my dad well. Like I said, he had a stroke.

I went to see him. He is doing okay.

He has to stay in the hospital until they figured out why his blood pressure is so very high. They have no idea why it is.

My mom, did not take it well. She actually got very little sleep, which triggered her being super angry at me (of course). She wound up screaming at me and hanging the phone up on me.

I didn’t even bother saying anything.  But then she followed the system that we setup ahead of time in the doomsday scenario and now she is doing much better.

I spoke to her last night and she is back to her old self.

But if my dad gets worse, that’s going to act as a major trigger for a potential bipolar episode.

In addition, someone who works for me, went into a bipolar episode and now is in the hospital.

In the past few weeks, I have had one person

get into a car accident, one person diagnosed with cancer (had to resign), one person has other serious medical problems not related to bipolar disorder (had to resign), my main computer is not working, my mom’s medication has changed, dad in the hospital and some other issues.

So it’s not been a good past few weeks.

BUT, I have a strategy to deal with these types of situations. You may have read about it in articles I posted online for f.ree.

Okay, I was talking to Michele yesterday and she was having a tough day.

She had a bunch of bad things going on.

So then she spoke to her mom who told her to remember the good things going on instead:

Like that she has a husband who loves her, a beautiful home, a great job, her bills are paid, her car runs good, she has 3 healthy sons, and she is stable with her bipolar disorder.

When Michele did that, her problems didn’t seem that bad!

We were talking about it, and I told her that I have to do the same thing.

There are nightmare days for me. Or weeks like I just told you.

But I train myself to think about the good instead of the bad. And there were lots of good things, too.

With bipolar disorder, too many people just focus on the negative.

That’s why, in my courses/systems, I teach people about positive thinking.

SUPPORTING AN ADULT WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?

Visit:

http://www.bipolarsupporter.com/report11

SUPPORTING A CHILD/TEEN WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?

Visit:

http://www.bipolarparenting.com

HAVE BIPOLAR DISORDER?

Visit:

http://www.survivebipolar.net

It is SO important to balance the bad with the good, or else your bipolar disorder can become WORSE!

If you don’t, you begin to think negatively, and negative thoughts lead to depression, and depression for too long leads to a bipolar depressive episode.

See why it’s so important to think about the good things, too?

Michele’s mom was right, and know how she came up with her little philosophy?

She has bipolar disorder just like Michele does!

And she’s been stable for a long time because she does what she told Michele to do, and what I told you that I do.

No matter how things seem, you can always find some good in it.

If you’re struggling, there are good things you may not even have thought of.

Even if it’s just the little things:

Like, you found this website.

You’ve learned about bipolar disorder, more than you knew before, which means you’re getting help for your disorder.

You have people that care about you.

You have a roof over your head.

You have food to eat.

You probably have a car to drive.

If you have children and they are healthy, count that as a good thing.

If you are physically healthy, count that as a good thing, too.

If you’re having a “good bipolar day,”  that’s a REAL good thing!

These are just some examples.

I know you can come up with more.

I’d love to hear about them.

FIND OUT WHAT PEOPLE ARE SAYING ABOUT ME

Visit: http://www.bipolarcentral.com/testimonials

David Oliver is the author of the shocking guide “Bipolar Disorder—The REAL Silent Killer.” Click Here to get FREE Information sent via email on how and why bipolar disorder kills.