=>PLEASE FORWARD TO FRIENDS, FAMILY AND LOVED ONES <=
Hi,
How’s it going?
I hope you are doing well today.
Lots of posts yesterday about my
question that I posed to you.
If you missed it, please read the blog
below.
Today I wanted to tell you about this
divorced woman that I met.
I was talking to her on the treadmill which
I spend a whole lot of time on.
Anyway, she started talking about politics
and then I told her that makes my head hurt
so she stopped talking about that.
She started talking about how society has
changed and many people aren’t into commitment.
She told me how she was divorced. She was about 55
or so years old.
She warned me about what kinds of woman to
avoid if I wanted to be happily married.
I asked her if she ever thought she would
get married again.
She said, “honey, I would like to but
but they have to pass my tests?”
I was like, “what tests?”
She was like, “honey, I have a bunch of tests
that have to see how they act. If they
fail then I am gone.”
I said, “yea what kind of tests like
SATs or the LSAT?”
She looked at me like I was crazy. It was a
non funny joke :). I knew she wasn’t asking
them math, English and science questions.
So she said how she had all these little
tests.
Here are some of them. She would ask
questions and put the guys in situations
that required them to make decisions. She
would rate the decisions.
Things like:
Would a guy drink and drive
Would the guy do drugs?
(she didn’t really explain how she tested
him for this).
Would the guy return her calls
in a timely fashion
She then said she had a cheating
test. It involved her asking a person
she was dating about a situation with
someone cheating. Based on the answers
she received, she was 98% confident
she could tell if this person would
cheat on her.
She had “lazy test.” I didn’t
really understand how she did
this test as well.
She had a “are you putting on
an act test.” Again, this one
confused me.
Now you might be thinking….this
woman is harsh or how can she know all
this or what the heck does this have to
do with bipolar disorder.
All great questions. First, since I was
DEAD tired doing cardio, I was paying attention
but I missed some key parts. Plus it’s loud
in the gym. But she seemed confident in
her “testing her man system.”
So I told her what I did for a living. All
the different businesses I had. She looked at me like
I was crazy. She didn’t know what bipolar
disorder was but she knew what depression
was. She said that her last husband depressed
her 🙂
Anyway I told her how I liked to test my
systems, doctors and therapists.
She asked what I meant.
I said for example, I will fax a doctor
information that’s important and ask for a
response.
This tests:
Do they read their faxes
Do they respond to their faxes
Do they lose faxes
Do they know what they are talking about
Same thing with the therapist as well.
I also do it with voicemails. I test
response time. I test follow through.
Do you know how many tens of thousands
of people on my list tell me that
their doctor or therapist NEVER get
back to them with an emergency. It’s
so common that people start to believe
it’s the norm. You might even have a story
like this.
I also use to (not so much now), run
tests of my systems in my head to see
what would happen.
I have real world experience with
test results. All of what you find
in my systems/courses below
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is the result of real practical testing of
what works and doesn’t work.
It is NOT theory. There is nothing
worse than an unproven theory. Know what
I mean? I mean when you need to know
something and someone just throws out
something that know one has ever done
or used and you try it and it’s a disaster.
I use to “run scenarios” in my head
and tests to see how my systems would hold
up.
I would ask myself….
What would happen if my mom went into a
super manic episode today. Who would do
what, when, how? What would my dad do?
What if my mom undid all the medical
releases that I didn’t have. What would
happen if her doctor retired. What
happens if her therapist quits?
What happens if my mom tries to
spend all her money again?
What happens if my mom tells everyone that
I can’t talk to them about her disorder.
I have solutions to all these potential
problems. All as a result of tests conducts
over the years.
I like to tests many people in the system.
For example, I test the pharmacy. I might find
some important information in a book
that they should know, like such and
such medication should not be taken in
the morning or at 4:00pm. I will ask
general questions. Check the responses.
If the responses make no sense, then
I know I have a potential problem.
You could say something like, “so it’s
okay to take this just once with alcohol
right?” If you hear, “oh sure, it’s
okay just once” run for the hills.
Because it’s NOT okay to take medication
with alcohol, just once.
I find that with bipolar disorder, that
a whole lot of systems, people and
places you thought you can count on totally
break down in the time of a bipolar
episode.
I like to test a lot of it ahead of time.
This lady said, “that sounds really interesting
honey…it sounds like a good smart idea. It’s
just like I do with my dates?”
NOTE-I don’t know why she kept calling me
honey. I kept telling her my name was
Dave. Sometimes she called me Steve however
🙂
I have no idea 🙂
I think everyone should consider doing
this. You don’t make it a big deal. You don’t
burden anyone you are testing but you throw
out some tests. See how people respond
because if they don’t response well in
the good times, they probably aren’t
going to be helpful in the bad times (
when bipolar episodes occur).
Check the systems as well. You can
run through things in your head.
Hey, I have to run.
Your Friend,
Dave
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