==>>Help with ALL aspects of bipolar disorder<<==
Check out all my resources, programs and information
for all aspects of bipolar disorder by visiting:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/catalog.asp
Hi,
I have a very intriguing email for you today.
I learned it from a friend of mine, who learned
it from someone she knows who works in a
bank.
LESSON FROM A DOLLAR BILL
Do you know how they learn to identify a
counterfeit bill in the banking industry?
Instead of teaching bank tellers all the
different ways that a dollar bill can be
counterfeited, they do something else.
They teach bank tellers to know the ins
and outs and ups and downs of a dollar
bill so intricately and intimately, that the
bank teller would be able to tell if even
the smallest thing were “off” or different
on the dollar bill. From the most minute
detail to the greatest counterfeiting error.
And if they can do it with a dollar bill,
they can learn to do it with any
denomination of bill.
So what does this have to do with
bipolar disorder?
Just this – that you, the supporter,
should know your loved one and
his/her “normal” self, who they
are between episodes, SO well…
all their quirks, every aspect of
their personality, everything that
makes them who they are as an
individual…
That you would KNOW…
Just KNOW…
If even the slightest little thing
were wrong with them.
See what I mean?
In my courses and systems, I teach
people how to identify the signs and
symptoms of bipolar disorder in their
loved one:
SUPPORTING AN ADULT WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarsupporter.com/report11
SUPPORTING A CHILD/TEEN WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarparenting.com
HAVE BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.survivebipolar.net
I also teach what triggers are, and
how to identify triggers in your loved
one, because everyone is different.
Once you have established and
intimately KNOW what your loved
one’s own signs and symptoms are, as
well as what their triggers are, it’s like
knowing that dollar bill.
THEN you can know, like I said before,
when even the slightest thing is “off.”
Imagine – think of all the pressure that
takes off you! You don’t have to
memorize so much stuff from a chart!
Or read and memorize stuff from 50
books!
You just have to learn the ins and outs
that apply to your loved one (like the
stuff I teach in my courses), and learn
them very, very, very well, so that you
will know when something is wrong.
Simple, isn’t it?
Well, I have to run.
Your friend,
Dave
–
P.S. Don’t forget to take a look through the
different programs I’ve put together… each one is designed
to help you with a different area of bipolar disorder whether
you have it or you are supporting someone with it.
You can see them all and get the details by visiting:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/catalog.asp
P.P.S. Check out my F.ree blog with copies of emails
that I have sent in the past and lots of great
information for you:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/supporterblog/
P.P.P.S Check out my F.ree podcast. Hear me give
mini seminars designed to teach you information
you can’t learn anywhere else.
http://bipolarcentral.libsyn.com
That’s right, Dave. You may be preaching to the choir here, though. I know the smallest little signs of when my husband is getting manic. We’ve been through it SO many times. He’s on meds, but I dont’ really think he takes them EVERY SINGLE DAY. I believe that’s probably why he had yet another manic episode recently. I can recognize the signs of his bipolar(very early on) but if he won’t listen, disagrees, gets beligerent, argumentative, overly confident, gets slack with the meds and slack about going to the doctor, what good is it for me to see the signs?! He hasn’t had very much “normal” time in the last 6 years. I remember his “normal” and I miss it.
i am the one that is seeing my own signs.they started the other day.not wanting to get out of bed,not wanting to go out,not wanting to do housework etc…this is the month that i lost my son to bipolar(he hung himself 3 yrs ago on the 18th)so i have to get my planning that i started LAST month into action NOW.before i end up in the hospital like last year at this time.but i did not have Dave last year to help me plan my actions.thank you dave from the bottom of my heart with your news letters every day.god bless you and your family.hope your mom gets through the holidays,but i am sure she will with a son behind her like you with your support.
Hi Dave I read the artical about the dollar bill !! You see I am the one with Bypolar!! I love all the help you have given me. So much insight as to what makes me tick! This is such good advise I’m not sure I want to share it with my caregiver which is my husband! I’m not sure I want him to know me that well !! LOL!! Keep up the good work you are an awesome person,I feel like I know you. Love coconutz!!!!
My trigger is stress. Along with Bipolar Disorder I have post Tramatic Stress Disorder. When I start living in the past I become arguementitve, extremely aggressive, Very fast speech patterns, loss of appetite, little sleep, when I am in my manic state I could end up anywhere. I have a fiduciary now so that I don’t give my money away or spend it in one day. I am so glad my wife has stayed by my side because when the bipolar rears it’s ugly head she takes the worst of it because of the things I say and do. James
That seems to be a good method to learn and to use. I see your point
Hi Dave, I have been reading your e-mails and I’m the one who suffers from bipolar disorder.I am a master at hiding. No one knows unless I tell them. My husband of 27 years well he can at times because I do get very aggravated.I wrote a book of poems and published myself, I sold 200 copy’s and I get nothing but postive feed back from it. I want to go main stream with it but ran out of funds. It would be the next best seller.no one knows me they see the outer, never the innercore I have so many mask that it would scare people if they reallyknew me. I have to protect myself at all times.Can’t let people in sometimes it’s very lonely, but I deal with it. that’s why I write I can say so much and some people still don’t get it. It’s like you are talking in code. do you know what i mean?
i understand what you are saying david but i really need help with the town i am living in because a younger female lives with me with bi-polar and i do not let them know they think an older guy with a younger female , we have had to move 3 times , we have gone to the police and they have said that its to serios and watch out , all i want to do is live my life and help the young lady live hers,thank you for your help david
HI DAVE! THIS IS SO TRUE ABOUT KNOWING YOUR LOVED ONES WARNING SIGNS. AND THANKS FOR THE E-MAIL. BUT, FOR ME THE PROBLEM LIES MORE WITH THE COOPERATION OF FRIENDS AND FAMILY. I REALLY SEEM TO GET HARDLY ANY KIND OF SUPPORT WHEN MY HUSBAND IS MANIC, OR LOW. I UNDERSTAND THIS IS HARD ON ALL LOVED ONES INVOLVED. SO I THANK YOU FOR THIS WEBSITE . YOU AND MY FAITH IN GOD AS A CHRISTIAN ARE WHAT GETS ME THROUGH. SHERI
Hi Dave. I am the BP one, and I have been reading your stuff for about a month trying to help my boyfriend understand. I love this email because it is so true. My last minor episode, fit this perfectly. My boyfriend kept asking over a few days what was wrong with me, if I was okay and ofcourse I said I was fine. He learned a big lesson, if I am really okay, I say I’m having a bad day or I am irratated… But I wasn’t okay. That was hard for him to understand but, its a start for him to see how the illness works. He is really patient and has only seen 2 episodes in 10 months. But these articles and emails are helping him ALOT! so thanks Keep up the great work you are doing.
Hi Dave, jeanmarie here, first i want to say thanx very much for your support i also want to say that i live in scotland in the u.k & could’n’t find any support for my family & i, it’s my brother who is bipolar & at the moment is experiencing a horrendous episode so once again thank you for your support your friend jeanmarie.looking forward to hearing from you soon so i can learn more.
hi dave, I am a supporter of my boyfriend who has bp. I love him so much but he is always pushing me away. In the last 2 years, he has broken our relationship off too many times to count. But I hang in there. It’a hard to at times, because I often feel like he doesn’t truly care about how I feel. But then he says something or does something for me and then I know in my heart that he really does care. It’s so hard, not so hard that I want to throw in the towel, so to speak on our relationship. But I appreciate the daily advice and encouragement from you. I’ve told him that if it weren’t for the emails I get from you, I still be in the dark with this disorder. Often he has manic episodes, that he hides things from me and his parents. He spends too much money and goes out drinking and gambling. He sees that spending money he doesn’t have, always hurts him financially. But not the drinking and gambling. how can I convince him differently? He does these things in excess when he is having an episode. I pray for him all the time. I’m just at a loss for what I can do. Please help!!!!
Yes, it is important to know the person well. I think I can feel when something starts getting wrong with my friend also by just my own reaction towards him. I think there are certain ways one (I can just speak for myself though) reacts to one’s bipolar loved ones’ manic or depressive phase even before one’s mind registers that there is something wrong and becomes aware of the symptoms or before the symptoms become clearly distinctive.
One cannot rely just on that feeling though, because it is just logical to claim that they are getting into an episode only when there is real proof of that.
However, when one becomes aware of this strange feeling and one’s own different reaction to their loved one, they can be on their guard and already start thinking of a plan and that could help to save time!
By my own reaction I mean, for example, my becoming more reserved and as if trying to ‘protect my borders’ etc when he is becoming manic.
The problem his relatives and I are facing is to get HIM to believe that he has symptoms of manic episode. I hope we can improve our skills step by step.
I admire you all who can manage that. I run out of patience quickly…
Dave, that’s FINE if you HAVE a supporter who can really RECOGNIZE the signs of an impending episode. I have to be my own “canary,” reacting to whether I’m headed for hypomania or not.
My boyfriend doesn’t know me well enough yet to know what’s “normal” with me and what’s hypomania. He saw my affair with another man as the “promiscuous” symptom of bipolar, and accepted it as such. He forgave me for that indiscretion, but I’m not sure I can forgive MYSELF for it. I feel I’m “damaged goods” and he’s just sooo forgiving and a “doormat” about it. I DO love him, but he doesn’t/can’t give me what I want/need with intimacy, so I have to sublimate my needs to his lack of them.
He also doesn’t understand my sleep patterns. He thinks I should have a definite time to go to bed, and a definite time to wake up. There are times I pull all-nighters, or get up at 4AM. I THRIVE on little sleep, like most bipolars, and can get sooo much done the next day. Unfortunately, he’s usually here after a long day, and finds me too tired to do anything…
I am aware of my triggers. Fortunately, the holidays don’t affect me one way or the other, and I usually enjoy them. I’m going to TX the second week of December for my Mother’s 82nd birthday, but am NOT looking forward to the traveling. My boyfriend seems to think I need to pull an all-nighter before the departure flight, and he’s probably right. I just have to rememeber to catch my connecting flight!!
BIG HUGS to all bipolars and those who love them. My prayers are with you:)
Hello. I also found the family’s monolog about bipolar disorder in japan.
He is trying to keep caring as supporter .
And he doesn’t force them to do .
Just listesing his speaking , not to let him alone.
here is the link
http://www.seri.sakura.ne.jp/~lisa/family/family.html
suzannew – i hope i am not crossing any boundries here, but i read your comment and you say your boyfriend understood the affair but you dont. I have been doing this awhile (bad relatonships like all of us BP’S) but the man in my life now goes out of his way to try to understand, but one thing he will not tolarate is an afffair. I thought what if i cant do it, be faithful. But i do really love him, and that is powerful. Find the person thats willig to love and try to understand all of it not just the most talked about stuff, he needs to understand the little stuff, thats what helps, we really mess up after when in it, there are always little warning signs that even we do not see. I have been faithfull for the first time, i hope it stays that way. BUT i work hard at it, dont put your self in a place that can open you up to it. Just like you know your family can cause stress, so can being alone with another man. It will make you feel better about your self, if you can do! If he really wants to understand you, he will learn the signs or find someone that can… just my advise and experiences it not gospel.
To LADY DI: When I was younger (late 20s, early 30s), I thought I could NEVER be monogamous. I was flitting from boyfriend to boyfriend (and sometimes stranger), and thought that I couldn’t be happy with just ONE man. When I was 32, I met a younger man – and stayed faithful to him for 3 years!
There was SOME temptation, but I loved him sooo much, I didn’t stray. Then, I met the man who would become my husband. I left the first guy (though I had regrets – he was paranoid schizophrenic, and BP and THAT don’t mix well), and was faithful to my husband until he died 5 years later.
I had several affairs between the death of my first husband and finding the love of my life almost 10 years later. None of them were meaningful – just “ships in the night.” I lived with this man for five years, and married him in 2003. Unfortunately, he died three months later…
I met Allan – the one I wrote about, who seems to understand what my needs ARE, but doesn’t SUPPLY them – in 2005. Unfortunately, a guy who I met after my second husband died, came back into my life – and I cheated. Allan pried into my emails, and found an incriminating one to the other man. We broke up. Allan came BACK into my life to help me bridge the death of a family member, and we’ve been together ever since (Easter of 2006).
As I said – he has forgiven me; but said that he keeps his “rucksack” in the dining room if ever he’s sent “packing.” I said on this blog that I don’t know if I can FORGIVE myself for treating Allan this way. But – as long as he’s letting by-gones be by-gones, I’m willing to go along.
Yes – I miss the physicality and intimacy I had with the other guy. He was FANTASTIC in bed, and my body DOES ache to be treated that way again. But Allan is 63, with ED and emphysema and COPD, and gets “winded” during/after sex. But – it seems my promiscuous days ARE over. Heck – I’m 59; I shouldn’t be having these feelings – I’m old enough to be a grandmother! But – the fact remains; I’m a horny bipolar, and I need satisfaction. I always harbor the thought that some man will enter my life during the week – I only see Allan on weekends – and “touch” me, and I’ll be “off” again. Should I worry about this? What do YOU think??
Desperate for an answer 🙂
Suzannewa- We all should be worried about it, its part of who we are, but just like the other things in are life, we deal it. I so understand what your going through, dont think i dont have the urges, men that have been in my life call at just the worng moments, when i’m feeling weak! But i stay away, i miss doing soe things just to be safe, I dont wan to lose the most incrdible man i have ever been with. I’m not sayig his the sexual compatible, I havea had a few that were fantastic, but what i have learned. Those men have there own issues, we are overly sexaul and to be that great to us, means the have a very high sex drive also. That can bring on a whole new set of issues that , we as bp’s dont need. I personally am findig more happiness in the relatonship, not the sex. It is helping not fell judged, are an object. Even when we start the sexual liasons we still feel like a failure later right? It is nice to talk to someone who knows how it feels to want more then sometimes we think we deserve.