Hi,
How’s it going?
I am actually going to a strongman contest that’s about 3.5 hours away so I haveto get going.
Before I go, I wanted to get you the daily email.
I have been writing these days that I have been having a bunch of major issues with software companies and advertising firms.
Well, this is what I have learned over the years:
You have to take really good notes with names, dates and times, and what happened.
You use these notes to explain your situation or cause to other higher ups, whatever the problem.
With bipolar disorder, many things come up where frankly you wind up dealing with organizations that are filled with dumb people.
The dumb people mislead. They give you a hard time. They lie. They work against you.
Sometimes you might even feel stigmatized.
You then have to go to a supervisor, or that supervisor’s supervisor with all the facts.
Once the higher ups see that you have details on what has been done, they normally relent and get you what you need or do what you need.
When I talk about this in my courses/systems, I talk about how important it is in relation to your loved one’s medical and mental health care.
SUPPORTING AN ADULT WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarsupporter.com/report11
SUPPORTING A CHILD/TEEN WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarparenting.com
HAVE BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
What if your doctor’s secretary was rude to you or your loved one, for example?
Well, you would write down their name, the date, time, and exactly what happened.
And you would do it right then, while it’s fresh in your mind.
Don’t you think this is something your doctor would want to know?
After all, the receptionist is the first person representing your doctor to his/her patients.
So then you would pass it on to the office manager, or the receptionist’s supervisor, whoever that is.
Keeping a copy of this record, if you still don’t feel that you’ve gotten relief, you take it up to the next level.
See how it goes?
What if you have a doctor, psychiatrist, or therapist and they aren’t the best?
Or if you feel that your loved one isn’t getting the right treatment, or the best treatment that they should be getting?
What would you do?
Well, you would start taking notes.
And you would go through the same procedure as above.
Only you might have to go all the way to the Medical Board. (and, of course, you may have to switch doctors).
Now, what if your loved one has to be hospitalized?
What if you had to wait an unusually long time in the waiting room, while they were in crisis with a bipolar episode?
This is where it is especially important to take down the person’s name (and other information, too) because your loved one probably shouldn’t be having to wait in an Emergency Room waiting room if they are in that kind of condition.
They should at least be waiting in the back where they don’t have to be dealing with a lot of people.
But you should find out the laws in your own state and the policies in that particular hospital to find out what you can do.
So, do you see how important record keeping can be?
Now, I mentioned back in the beginning about feeling stigmatized.
This is where record keeping can be important as well.
If you feel as if you or your loved one were treated “less than” or any different than someone else just because you or they have bipolar disorder, the person who treated you that way should be reported to a higher up, so they don’t do it to the next person.
As long as you have a name (and also get the name of their supervisor), date, phone number, details of what happened, and any other information you feel is important, you can do something about it.
Has this ever happened to you?
Did you take good records?
What happened?
Post responses below
David, thanks for your daily tips. I have been involved as best as I can with my daughter. However, she doesn’t want my involvement when it comes to her doctors or therapists. she only wants my involvement for my money or for my help with her child.
I have called and had to speak to supervisors as you stated when it comes to important situations that secretaries or clerks cannot handle or undertand. When you are from the North,especially N.Y. Or L.A. and move to the south, there is a big difference in comprehension amongst people. Bipolar people can wear you out mentaslly, physically, and monetarily. All you do is worry about their safety.
my partner has been diagnosed with Bipolar disorder last year. we’ve been trying to be together for 18 years. off/on..but these past two years we have been been committed to make it happen this time. her primary care DR put her on Paxil and a med for BIPOLAR. she chgd the dose and pill a few times. my partner buys/drinks goes thru a 30 pack of Natural light every other day. Her DR called her an alcoholic. Pissed her off and now she went off unofficially all her meds and still drinks. She doesn’t drink during working hours 6-2pm but once she is off work, she starts until she passes out. What i don’t get is how she can treat me and only me like crap sober or while drinking. she plays head games with me where she gets me to explain everything or my feels but she withholds hers from me..basically leaves me hanging and frustrated. She wanted to move in w me and my daughter bcuz her lease was up in June. I said lets’ try unofficially as I have a 6 year little girl that could be impacted so I am limiting the pain she will see. Well my partner had an episode and ended us ..I don’t know maybe for the 150 millionth time. she doesn’t get her way she ends it over the fact i didn’t fix the right food for dinner. she then texts the hell out of me where our problem started out at one thing and ends up everything is wrong. everything is a battle with her and she has to win or we are done. i love this girl with all my heart soul and inter being. i fought to have her for 18 long years thru all ur other relationships that didn’t and still don’t treat her like I can. She is beautiful and when she is “normal” she is someone I am soo proud to share on her successes. Everyone wants me to get rid of her bcuz she is very mean and jealous of my time with anyone even my child. Now she is comparing herself to my child and texting me I have all I need and I am complete now bcuz I have my child and there is no room for her. She now is saying we are over and not budging on this. Before I could get her to change her mind, I took the blame bcuz I wanted to be with her. She joined the premiscus stage end of May. She bought herself toys to play with and started sending me the pictures to tease me. We got back together for 2 weeks and everything was great, sex,the time she wanted, etc. Then she comes to my daughters BDAy party and flipped out on me. Now, she texts me occasionally to tell me we are done, I have all I need, we are over, she isn’t interested any more,makes me think and maybe she is don’t know the fact she may be seeing someone again on me. I don’t and can’t afford to buy your package with cut backs at my job I need every dime I have. I went back to our EAP counseling to help me get thru this mental abuse bcuz I am finding myself begging basically for her to come back. The counselor is telling me to get away from her because she is taking me away of all the good things I have and represent. I have soo many things we didn’t finish that we planned. We were going to have a commitment ceremony..She doesn’t care how bad she hurts me and one thing she has never been there for me emotionally. She doesn’t care..she tells me to call my counselor. She has 3 kids and 3 grandkids. They all care for her when they want money or want to go some where so mom pays. She is devastated how her kids treat her but she keeps allowing it 2 occur. Why she keeps treating them like gold hurts me when I am the one that finds her dehydrated, drunk or whatever and has to go to the hospital to get her back in shape for her job. She baits me alot on the text to make me think I have a chance still but then turns it around and takes it back. She contacts all her past relationships as they are in a circle of once done move to the next. They use her too but she allows that. I can’t tell her my feelings what she did that hurts me nothing only if I am willing to be punished and lose her again.. HELP!
Hi David,
I want to thank you for the stories and tips in your daily newsletters and to share something that happened to me last month that had me upset, extremly worried and eventually crying hysterically because I had no where to turn for help.
It was a Friday when I realized I had run out of my meds so when I got off work I ran to to my hospital pharmacy.There I was informed that I had no approved refills left so they would have to contact the doctor for approval. Normally they make you wait 2 days for it to be filled. You have to order before you run out.
The lady that took my order was very nice and understood the urgency. She went to work writing up the order and gave it to a pharmasist in the back.
I waited while they tried to reach the doctor being reassured once that they were still working on it and hadn’t forgotten me.
After 45 to 50 minutes they finally gave up and told me that I might have better luck going upstairs to talk to my doctor in person .
Upstairs I told the receptionist the story so she could get ahold of the doctor but she said the doctor had gone home already and so had the nurses who may have been able to help me. The doctors last appointment was at 4:30. I had been there since 4:00 with the pharmacy attempting to call up there. The receptionist said she had no calls.
She couldn’t help me except to put in an urgent request for the doctor to find on Monday no,Tuesday. This was Memorial day weekend.
So basically, they are telling a person with a mental illness ” I’m sorry, we cant give you the medicine that will keep you stable. You’ll have to wait 4 days.
Is it any wonder why I was an emotional mess? I didn’t know what to do or what to expect not taking my meds. Would it send me into an episode?
What about the other med that I take at night to counter ballance the morning one? Do I take it or not? I had no answers and I felt totally helpless and alone.
Well I just wanted to share this with you. I told my therepist when i saw him this month but i have yet to tell the psychiatrist that gives me the meds. You can bet I will be asking for answers when I talk to her.
Thank you for letting me tell my story. I’ll continue to read yours.
Sincerely, Elaine Isaacson
Dave;
You mention the one above the supervisor, =the one with all the “answers.
The Genocidal Cult which calls itself “psychiatry” has NO ANSWERS.
ALL SCIENCE MEDICAL & OTHERWISE PROVES THEIR THERAPIES CAUSE THAT WHICH THEY ARE SUPPOSIDLY TREATING FOR A START.
I SHOULD HAVE YOU & ALL OF YOUR KIND SHUT DOWN!
I work for a large grocery store, and about a week ago I went to the store mgr. to talk about transferring me to another dept. (he also had another mgr. come in – She is one that backs on me on things that he does)due to the position I am in has been causing extra stress, due to unrelistic expectations for me to do. In talking to Him I said that my Dr. had adjusted my meds for Bipolar due to the stress and it causing me to go into episodes (I had told off a co-worker 2 times in 3 days – same co-worker same subject). The store mgr. said “Why didn’t you tell me that you had Bipolar from the time I hired you”? then said his sister n law has it and is on major meds and that it is a major illness….I told him that it is not something I would go into a interview with, by telling I had BPD. I also told him that the other mgr. has known for awhile now, and my immediate supervisor also knew. He just kept repeating this to me, he then was saying here you have been working with knifes (I cut fresh fruit) and that is dangerous, I told him that I have been doing it for over a year and have not done anything. I had told him that the transfer I would like would be in Bakery or service deli. He told me that I would not be able to do bakery, that I would be working by myself, I replied that I am now working by myself. He then said then you would like service deli, where I said “yes”. He then told me that he wanted a list of my meds. and that he needed to make a couple of phone calls and talk to that other mgr. He again told me he wished I would have told him from the start, that things could have been different and that he would have still considered me. He also had told me that he has alot of people looking for jobs and they are experienced and could just go right into the position without any help, I replied by telling him that “you are now making me feel like I am not experienced and do not know what I am doing”. All this ended with me being mad and him telling me we would do something in a month possibly. We are unionized, so 1st I called and made me a appt. with my therapist, which I saw the folling day. I told her what had happened, she was really mad that he would have done and said these things to me, and that he is not a professional and has no right telling me the things he did. Also saying does he not know the ADA…she told me to promise her that I would call my union. I called as soon as I got home, our union rep. just told me that he could now use it to my disadvantage due to the illness. I was not happy with my results of the call. I made a list of my meds and a list of positions I felt I would qualify for including the bakery, saying that I felt I could do the job. I am now just waiting to see the outcome. I am still pretty upset by this situation. I would welcome any comments etc on this matter. Thanks for all your helpful e-mails, they really do help.
As a retired health care professional, I cannot stress enough how very important this is. If you complain (whether legitimately or not)and have no documentation, people may listen but won’t do anything, usually. Why? Because you are asking them to go through a lot of extra work to identify the culprit and you should do that for them. They already have much to do to research and rectify the situation. Be an advocate. Save yourself or the next person from the same treatment or grief.
David – Why do you allow Troy’s offensive comments and threats on your board? He is obviously not in reality, unmedicated or undermedicated and needs treatment. He is not on this support blog to be helpful in any way. He sounds like an out of control manic.
When my daughter really wanted to keep her boyfriend, she agreed to see a counselor. First she was diagnosed with depression, but antidepressants didn’t do any good. She lost patience with the bipolar meds; different ones needed to be tried, then different dosages. I don’t know how to get a person to sit still for treatment.
Totally agree with ABC. Troy has got it in for the wonderfyul advice and help you try to give out.
I trying to help a bi polar recoverer and she dictates everything even down to days when i can and cannot call her. Se catually went to hospital and did not have the decency to tell me. If I had known I wold have been there for her. Is a side effect of their meds the fact that they are not able to do things like just answer the phone? I would be grateful for any advise on this. THanks guys Jay