Hi,
I hope you’re having a good day.
Recently I had someone on my list write in and report plagiarism, that another website was using my material.
I investigated and, in fact, the material this other website was using was amazingly similar to my stuff.
They say that “Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery.” Either way, I didn’t do anything about it except to keep a record of it for the future in case it happens again or if the woman on this website keeps doing this, because either way, the important thing is that the information is getting out there.
That’s what I wanted to talk about today.
The importance of spreading the word – of getting the information out there.
Now, I know it shouldn’t be your responsibility to teach others about bipolar disorder, that it should be the responsibility of the doctors and other mental health professionals and organizations, but they just aren’t doing it, so there is still a stigma associated with bipolar disorder.
That’s exactly what I talk about in my courses/systems below:
SUPPORTING AN ADULT WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarsupporter.com/report11
SUPPORTING A CHILD/TEEN WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarparenting.com
HAVE BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
I talk about the stigma associated with bipolar disorder, and how you can deal with it.
But no, there shouldn’t be that stigma, either way. And the only way to fight it is with information. And usually that information has to come from you. Think about this:
For every person you talk to, or even just think about yourself – they know, or even you know, at least 3 people who have bipolar disorder. Did you know that? Like I said, just think about yourself, for example. Obviously, the first one is your loved one. But think about other people. Don’t you know at least 2 other people who are touched by bipolar disorder in some way?
Either they have it, or their loved one has it, or someone in their family has it, or they know someone who has it, or they’ve heard of someone who has it, right? This is called “degrees of separation.”
And everyone is touched by bipolar disorder by at least 3 people.
But, like I said before about the plagiarism thing, the most important thing is that the information on the disorder is getting out there, so people are getting educated on it.
I know it’s not your responsibility, but if you do tell people what you know about it, you’re educating them. And the more people know about it, the less they’ll fear it, and the less stigma there will be about it. See how it works?
So you, yes you, can actually have a part, maybe even a big part, in educating society, even if it’s just one person at a time, on bipolar disorder.
FIND OUT WHAT PEOPLE ARE SAYING ABOUT ME
Visit: http://www.bipolarcentral.com/testimonials
David Oliver is the author of the shocking guide “Bipolar Disorder—The REAL Silent Killer.” Click Here to get FREE Information sent via email on how and why bipolar disorder kills.
Post responses below
I agree that everyone needs education when it comes to Bi-polar Disorder or any other illness. My sister-in-law is a diabetic type 2 and I have done everything I can to get her educated on what to do and not to do, even buying expensive books for her, but it all falls on deaf ears. She is about 5’2′ and I would guess she weighs well over 400#. So it all boils down to this, some people want to know and others would just as soon remain ignorant. But in the meantime, I do have quite an extensive medical knowledge, without formal education, so I try to educate others on whatever they have and how to get more information than what I have to offer. (Obviously I am not a Dr so I don’t know it all by a long shot) I often forward your emails to others, but I don’t think anybody has signed up for your daily emails and news and that is a shame as you provide so much info, but I do know you have a very large mailing list so you are certainly getting the word out to those who want to know. Good work and well appreciated!
I have tried to “educate” everyone I know about bipolar disorder, because I genuinely feel people should be aware of this insiduous disorder which affects, as you said, a whole lot of people. In this case, ignorance is definitely NOT bliss. The more one knows about bipolar, the more one can understand, empathize with, and tolerate better, those they come into contact with who may have it. Ignorance is a killer with b/p. People think you’re CRAZY or stupid or both, when the opposite is true. People think you’re just a really moody, irritable person, a “loose cannon”, can’t be trusted to react normally to stuff, etc. etc. I’m really tired of all the misconceptions, so I personally try to educate everyone I can get my hands on (not strangers though!) about what bipolar sufferers go thru every day!
Note: My boss at work didn’t know what bipolar disorder was, so I took the time to explain it to her. Now she treats me with more kindness and understanding if I am too ill to come to work one day, instead of jumping down my throat or giving me the third degree.
However, my mom (God rest her soul, she passed away in 2006), when I told her just after I got diagnosed, she didn’t understand it, didn’t really WANT to understand it, and just said “That doesn’t run in OUR family”. Every time I got annoyed with her at all for anything, she said “Oh, there’s your bipolar acting up again” which WASN’T helpful at all! However, she was 80 years old, “old school” thinking. It was called “manic depression” in her day, and people who had it actually WERE thought of as “crazy”.
Of all the people I have tried to educate about bipolar, 99 percent of them have been quite receptive to my words, and relieved to know that I had a proper diagnosis.
i feel if we held small seminars in each of our own areas maybe we could educate more people. yes the internet has become a way of the future
but i feel if people were in a group and talk freely more then maybe we could get more info out there. david your info has been the best info as doctors really ARE NOT TOTALLY EDUCATED like they should be not even
the dr that calls himself a mental health person. i would even like to see more support groups started.
thank you for the info,
I read it daily. I have learned so much.
It is hard to retain all the info, but I keep some brief notes,
so I can go back and read them again.
have a nice day.
S.Charles.
B/P is such a horrible mental illness.
my son has b/p.
but his drugs, drinking and dyfunctional life style, has taken a toll on his quality of life..
he does not take his meds, because he rather listen to his so-called friends, who all do the same thing (DDD).
we have not spoken to him in several months, because he decided to move out.
he recently went to drug rehab center fora month, but he is out now, and might be doing the same thing over again.
He does not work, can keep a job more than a week,
is moody, and has anger mgt problems, etc. depression, etc,etc.
He does not keep any of his doctors appt in the mental health dept..
The only time he calls, is when he needs money. I do not give him any money, because it is used for (DDD).
he is living a dyfunctional life style, with his terrible habit.
It only hurts me, to see him live this way. so I rather not see him or speak to him.
thank you.
need some advise, what do I do.
Sandy:
All I can say is that, from the time I was 15 until I was 49 and diagnosed with bipolar disorder, I drank like a fish, smoked a bunch of pot, and hung around with drug addicts and alcoholics. They were my friends. But that was because I was young, rebellious, and had and undiagnosed mental illness. Your son has at least received a diagnosis. If he is not taking his meds, unfortunately there is no way his condition will improve. He needs to go for counselling. At his age it is a MUST. I only wish I had gone for some professional help when I was young, but I thought I knew everything, nothing was wrong with me, and “never trust anyone over 30” (an old saying from the 70’s, when I was a teen).
You are right not to lend him money, he will only spend it on dope or booze. But it is a shame you can’t even see him or speak to him. I wish you all the best in getting him to go for counselling, maybe they can explain to him how important taking your med’s is when you have b/p, and how drinking and drugs only worsen the symptoms.
– Been there and back
I was told in the hospital that “God does not make Junk” and that yes being educated in this illness is what it is all about!! I have had bi-polar since the birth of my last child and that was when I was 33.
I was told bi-polar usually hits in the twenties. My diagnosis was confused with bad baby blues…..I have taken medicine since.
I am currently taking Trileptal, the generic form.
I think the best book i’ve read on bi-polar was called, Life on a Roller Coaster but I cannot remember who it was by but it described us bp’s to a tee.
But society does label us with this stigma of mental and that disturbs me. However the more educated you are on bi-polar the easier it is to deal with and to take your meds without question.
Yes, MR. Oliver is a Godsend. Most of the time when I go to my mental health facility I feel like I am wasting his time and mine.
Joni
For Cheryl,
I agree that there should be more seminars etc on bi-polar. I cannot find any support groups to go to either. I live in Trumann, Ar and my psychiatrist said, “Start one and I’ll come.”
Maybe that is a thought….we could educate people better if we were able to go to these ourselves and have a supervisor over us. Is this what Mr. Oliver does?
Joni in Arkansas
I never realized until I had Bipolar just how many people have it. I have heard of many. I know people who know someone with it, I know some who I think might be, due to similar behaviors to mine, but I haven’t yet crossed paths with anyone who with no doubt has it and has disclosed it. I have obviously met some within support groups and definately those in places all over the world that I have been in contact with on Bipolar Websights etc. Currently, I am a member of Bipolarsa which is an organization in South Africa (believe it or not). It is a safe place for me to talk to people and it is not likely I will ever meet any of them. I still have many struggles currently in my life. I am back on meds and I am balancing my moods, but I still keep messing up. I keep putting my life into trouble and risking relationships and putting my family in caos. I am hanging in there, but it seems like a never ending battle. I find my music really helps. Singing and playing the guitar. I know that part of my issues due stem from way back and no amount of medication will help me solve those. I know the true answer to truly dealing with my traumatic past is to get therapy. I don’t want this to sound like a sob story…..but I have been physically, emotionally and mentally abuse by and ex husband. I have lost a baby 10 years ago now to SIDS, and at the age of eleven I was molested. My whole life I have been trying to get strong and move past all of it. Now knowing I have Bipolar I understand why it has been so hard, however it doesn’t change my struggle to move on. Yes….I am currently undergoing therapy. I have done some terrible things and have really hurt my current husband and my parents. I am on the border of losing it all if I don’t start leaning how to cope better. I have lied and been deceiptful, I have committed adultry attempting to feed my need of acceptance and understanding, and none of it with intent to harm anyone but desperately looking for answers to my shattered and empty soul. If anyone finds themselves in these words and can relate in any way, or those who have an perspective on what is next for me, I would appreciate any amount of feedback i can get. I have tough shoulders and I getting pretty used to critism. So don’t be afraid to be REAL and BLUNT with me.
Thanks
I know that what you do with your very informative site is helping a lot of people educate themselves and others about all the issues that are associated with bipolar. It informs people on not just the medical concerns, but the social and economic concerns as well.
It is amazing that most of the professional entities are not as well equipped or as knowledgeable with all that this illness encompass.
You Dave, offer people so many resources and ways to learn and resolve and understand the whole spectrum of this disorder. And, I have not found a Doctor, or facility that can provide people with the knowledge that I get from your site- bar none. Plus, you provide updates on what’s new and effective, give links to news articles and the list goes on and on. For me, it’s ALL THAT!
Your site is a kind of group therapy that allows people to share and express some of their experiences with people from around the world and touch on issues that most doctors and mental facilities don’t or will not address.
I think you should market your product to doctors as a means of helping their patients become more aware of the many outlets and ways available to understand and get people knowledgeable on how to handle having or supporting someone with bipolar as they are so entangled in diagnosis and administering medication and therapy that they can’t really direct people to legitimate help that is available for them.
I have let the people at the facility where I get medical attention know that they should give your site to people in need of information about mental illness.
By the way, I have a wonderful idea for you.
Dave, you are a very special person and your success with this and in life will only continue to flourish because you fight for a cause that you believe in and this is one of your many purposes in life. If there is anything I can do to help you continue to help me and so many others, please let me know. Word of mouth is so powerful; therefore I will continue to spread the word.
i have bipolar disorder and my docter treats me as though everything is in my head. my physical therapist was woried that if he pissed me off i would try to kill him its so extream of how people judge that it is almost not worth trying to get help becouse the people that i can go to wont help but just and another antidepression medication to the list
I’m so lost and sad…I have been reading your stuff daily for over a year…I am a supporter….of who USE to be my fience he has been in a BAD way for over a year…the first year was up and down…the 2nd year was WONDERFUL he kept a job,slowed down on drinking no drugs….this past year hiding drug use (i’m totally against drugs) drinking like a fish which caused many fights and has only worked 9 weeks 3 different jobs in 13 months….plus the cheating cheating cheating…about 2 weeks ago he left me…I supported him for the worst year of my life and he left me….but he did go to one counseling meeting so maybe he will get some help…he is in trouble with the law and is court ordered to do counseling but doesn’t and to go to AA but no meetings…my friends and family are all so mad at me because I have always just got info for him told him of jobs things like that but I felt that HE HAS TO WANT IT…so I just stayed by him and helped when and where I could walking on egg shells waiting for the next freakout to happen and took care of me and my kids the best I could…but now he is gone everyone expects me to be happy and just move on…Maybe I’m the one who is wrong but I don’t feel like this is the person I love that is acting this way I feel like its the BI-POLAR acting up and the fact he is an addict and not on a proper program or any meds……so am I wrong to say that if he had proper help his program in place and his problem under control he would return to the man I love…they say I’m making excuses…what do some of you other supporter due to educate the people always putting YOU DOWN for being a supporter?? I don’t want him back until he is ready and already making some of these choices to better his life…I can’t make those for him….but I do wonder if I”M IN DENIAL and trying to justify his actions but when I read others stories I feel validated that you CAN AND ARE two different people some times….and that it is a REAL problem NOT just his problem….I’m so lost and confused and alone and sad…I don’t want to give up hope…….HELP
To Lindsay Says:
You are brave and courageous for sharing your story. Many have experienced some of the very same things that you have and are dealing with and a variety of other issues as well. I know that it is hard to forget the past and let go of some of the behavior that has become habit. Indeed, You can do it
You must understand that your past dose not determine your future. Try to let go of some of the bad memories and pain of the past. Let go of the guilt and shame. We have all made some unfavorable decisions in life. But, you must forgive yourself, and the people that hurt you and the ones you have hurt and try to move on. It’s not easy, but it’s possible.
You are worthy of happiness and so much more. Believe that. Don’t give up.
You have a testimony; therefore, you have taken the first step by sharing what’s inside, and this is part of the healing process. Being honest with yourself and others is good for the soul. Please don’t keep torching yourself with low self-esteem and dishonesty. Self love is the best love. You are worthy! I hope that the medication and therapy will help you.
I am so hurt that you had those traumatic experiences, but you are here for a reason, and you have a purpose if life. I bet you sing well, and that you are a very loving and caring person. You will get control of your life because you want to. Stay on track.
Sharing your story has probably help someone understand the whys and struggles that they go through so don’t feel alone, be encouraged and try to take it one day at a time.
Allow others to love you for whom you are, know that you don’t need the whole world to accept and understand you, just the ones that you allow and are worthy of such. Self Acceptances is key,
I pray that you will find the beauty and inner peace within yourself that will allow you to not resist healing and closure that awaits you.
Believe that it is possible for you to live the life you desire.
Much Love,
Mandy Jay
Dave and all supporters; Thank you again for your love, compassion and for being here for all us, the ill klan. I am learning very much, although some people among mother and siblings don’t like that I tell everyone that I have bipolar disorder. I recently read in a French place it could also be considered a gift if managed in the right way, and that’s what we are doing here, learning how to get the best out of our illness.
I don’t want to plagiate anyone, but I’d appreciate if I am given permission to translate some of the comments herein, to be ready for a Mexican place that intends to be opened by bipolars for our own support. So my petition is to have the benefit of this place to teach others around.
My translation today shall be of the Mandy Jay-Lindsay conversation.
Love and light to all
Maria de la Luz
To LINDSAY: Thank you for sharing your deepest hurts with us. I can understand the “cheating,” being either physical or emotional; that is one of the symptoms of this disorder – being promiscuous sexually, looking for SOMETHING to validate us as a viable, WANTED human being. I have cheated on a former boyfriend, my first husband, and now my current boyfriend. I KNOW I have violated their trust, and THAT hurts me.
With my current boyfriend, he has understood that it is a part of my illness, and we are both working on the trust issue. He lives an hour-and-a-half away, and now we are only seeing each other as “companions” to various functions when we need a partner. I have moved on; he CAN’T give me what I’m looking for – he’s “cold” emotionally, and has NEVER given me the kind of affection I crave. But – he is a nice guy, and I AM sorry I hurt him.
We all have to work on self-acceptance and put the past behind us. I can only assume how deep and distressful the loss of your child had been for you. Can you have other children? Maybe you’re afraid. I can understand that. But-give it to the Lord, and ask Him to forgive your unstable behaviors. He will understand and give you peace.
I agree with Dave that more people need to be educated on bipolar disorder, and that we’re not all “crazies” who are “loose cannons” and will “go off” for no reason at all. I have been stable for more than 30 years (the date of my last hospitalization for mania), on the right medications, therapy, and now, trying to regulate my sleep patterns. The more information we get out into the “public,” the less stigma there will be about this disorder. The “degrees of separation” idea is TRUE. It’s the old adage, “If there are four people together, and you don’t have bipolar – someone ELSE does!” It has become the “designer disease,” as you can see ads for antipsychotics on TV!! As more people become aware of the symptomatology of bipolar and look into their actions, the more people will go to get treatment.
I hope that God grants you His Peace, and you will come to be a wholly functional, productive member of society – look how far you’ve come!!
BIG HUGS to all bipolar survivors and those who love us. May God bless you real good.
I ordered $150.00 worth of materials and never received anything. Is anybody else having this problem?? Nobody will get back to me. HELP!!!!
To LINDSAY:
I want to start this by saying that I feel there is a reason for everything and god doesn’t make mistakes people do. I to was molested at the age of five and raped at 21. I to know what it felt like for me to loose a child. Everyone greaves differently so I would never tell someone that I know what they went through I can only imagine there pain from knowing my own. I have four living children I have been pregnant 11 times. My first pregnancy was with twins. One was healthy and the other had a congenital heart defect. She was a year and twenty days when she passed away and I remember it like it was yesterday. It’s been 18 years and the pain of loosing her is still there. I had several miscarriages and every time I got pregnant, I was scared to death. It is the worst feeling in the world and I sympathize with anyone that has ever gone through it.
Unfortunately, I to know what it is like to be abused by someone both physically and mentally by someone that is suppose to love you. I was married four times before I found someone that is or tries his hardest to be understanding. We were married before I was diagnosed with bipolar 1. He knew about me having panic attack and post -traumatic disorder. When I was diagnosed with bipolar 1, I was sure he would leave me. My mood swings were horrible and I couldn’t seem to get them under control even with medication. I was also living with the guilt of my past. Drinking and out of control behavior. By the age of 15, I was out of control and didn’t know how to explain anything that had happened to me. Clearly, I was bipolar then but was diagnosed with depression at that time. He was the one that took my hand and told me the past was the past and he would stand beside me no matter what. He took my hand and made me go to a psychiatrist. He was and is beside me through everything. He is the one that made me take the first step to getting stable.
Our long talks about what happened in my past was very hard for me. The guilty feeling I have still. Thinking that I in some way might have caused it but knowing now that it wasn’t my fault. However, him being there telling me the past is the past and what we have is our future. What happens from this point on is what matters. Telling me as long as I try he will too. Helping me stay on my meds, and keep going to the doctors that are helping me, he will be here to help me through the difficulties of our lives.
So hold your head up, the people that mind don’t matter and the people that matter don’t mind. It’s a learning process for everyone including yourself and everyone close to you. Unfortunately, we don’t come with manuals and what works with one person doesn’t always work with someone else. Just know your not alone and people do care about you even if you don’t think they do.
I am told that my leaving on my own free will is a selfish act. I feel as if the person keeping me here is being selfish. I want to be at peace and free from pain; the person does not want to let go of me.
David Oliver just sent me some info on “Stigma” about Bi-polar, well from my experience, there is always stigmas about Bi-polar, people hear that you have it and they get uncomfortable with it right away, and look at you like a freak, or your dangerous and all the stuff that comes with it.
He said to educate people on it, well I do, but it does not seem to help, they still have that “wierdness” about you, my daughter 17 has it to, and all through school she was bullied and teased, people made fun of her, and all down the line, so I have tried to educate people on it, some listen, others are still scared, it is a hard thing for people to absorb it seems when they learn you have it. There needs to be more information out there on this to let people know we are not dangerous, or freaks or what ever they have called us!
Suzanne –
you are so right about what you said about people needing to know that we are not nuts because we are bi-polar, but like I said, people hear you have it, and bam! they judge you right away. I have been stable the last ten years of my life. I had a serious break down ten years ago, and it took a lot of work to get here! but i am stable, on great meds, I don’t let people know I am Bi-polar, sure they notice I am “different” but I leave it at that, I have been tormented because people knew I have it, but I have pulled away from that, and where I am today is a better place, people need to take time and understand we are not crazy, some will some won’t.
Tried them all:
What would you like us to do?? You have repeatedly written in to this blog and told us you are going to kill yourself. Several of us have expressed sincere concern and worry, several of us (including a Registered Nurse) have given you their email addresses to try and communicate with you and stop you from doing a terrible thing from which there is no looking back. Yet you continue to insist that what you are planning to do is right, and you ARE going through with it no matter what! So what would you like David Oliver or any of us to do? Because it is very distressing to read your emails and not be able to help in any way.
Education only occurs when their is a teacher and a student. To be the teacher, you must be informed and willing to share your knowledge and experiences in a way that people can grasp. The student must be willing to learn. We can “inform” people (friends, family, colleagues, etc.) about being and living with someone who is bipolar, but we cannot “educate” someone who does not want to be educated or learn. I believe it is fear that keeps people from really wrestling with the truths of a living and coping with bipolar. We, the afflicted, must get better at communicating in way that people can and want to understand. This is a lifetime venture of collaboration, trial and error. It is acceptable to be “diabetic” by the world’s standard, but not to be bipolar, in most circles. I urge us to be well educated, or ourselves, and be “stories of recovery”. People learn from seeing changed lives!
i was wondering about the admin/moderator position
In June of this year, I recieved a telephone call from my Step Sons land lord..He asked me how I was and then told me to sit down he had some bad news for me..The kind man told me a gently a possible,” Eddie is dead” I can still hear his words. Eddie, my Stepson,was Bipolar. He was on a coctail of drugs along with using illeagle drugs..He relocated here from another city to “Start over again and get back with his children”. He was on ssi because he could not hold a job for any length of time.He was married twice and lived with a woman for over 16 years and never married her. Eddie had four children whom he did not see, three daughters and one son. His disorder destroyed his life and it seemed nothing could help him but the drugs..Sad but true..I am so pleased to know you are getting the word out about this disability, it needs to be understood and treated in a proper manner..I wish there was something I could do to help..Sincerly,Beverly