==>>Help with ALL aspects of bipolar disorder<<==
Check out all my resources, programs and information
for all aspects of bipolar disorder by visiting:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/catalog.asp
Hi,
How’s it going? I am kind of annoyed. My cell
phone isn’t working. I pay so much money
for a cell phone and it never works right?
Ever call Sprint customer service? It’s like
dealing with 100 bipolar episodes.
Anyway let’s talk about what we have to talk
about today.
I have been getting a lot of communications
(via email, phone, blog, letters in the
mail) about how do you know.
First let me say this. It’s a skill to
know what’s part of a bipolar disorder
episode or what can lead up to one
versus what is a person’s normal
behavior.
Today I am going to give you one technique
that you can use to help yourself figure
it out. This isn’t the only technique
but only one.
Here’s what you do. You get a blank sheet
of paper and you write down answers
to when you FIRST met the person that
you are supporting.
How did the person normally treat people
What type of language did the person normally use
How kind was he/she
Did he/she curse
Did he/she curse in a mean way towards you
Did he/she yell at you
Was he/she caring?
I think you get the idea. You write down
these answers.
Then step two is to envision the person
and what they were like when you first met
them. Spend at least 10 minutes thinking
about this.
Now you have a clear picture of the way
the person is and now you take this picture
and the information on your sheet and you
compare or juxtapose it against current
behavior.
If there is a big difference this could
be a sign the person is not under the right
treatment plan or currently in a bipolar
disorder episode.
When I first started supporting my mom,
I use to use worksheets and do a lot of
work to figure it out. But then it because
built into me and I know longer needed
my own self created instructions (the ones
that I just helped you make).
Today I can tell almost instantly what is normal
behavior for my mom versus bipolar behavior.
But I have a number of other means to figure
this out as well. That’s just one technique
I use.
I have more in my Bipolar Supporter Course.
If you have bipolar disorder I have information
in my Bipolar Success Course on what to do
when you feel yourself “going off track.”
You can get more information on them below.
SUPPORTING AN ADULT WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarsupporter.com/report11
SUPPORTING A CHILD/TEEN WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarparenting.com
HAVE BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.survivebipolar.net
Well I have to run. Have a great day and I
will catch you tomorrow.
Your Friend,
Dave
P.S. Don’t forget to take a look through the
different programs I’ve put together… each one is designed
to help you with a different area of bipolar disorder whether
you have it or you are supporting someone with it.
You can see them all and get the details by visiting:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/catalog.asp
P.P.S. Check out my F.ree blog with copies of emails
that I have sent in the past and lots of great
information for you:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/supporterblog/
P.P.P.S Check out my F.ree podcast. Hear me give
mini seminars designed to teach you information
you can’t learn anywhere else.
http://bipolarcentral.libsyn.com
THANK YOU FOR THIS INFO, I AM A RETIRED NEURO NURSE THAT HAD BEEN SEEING A GUY FOR FIVE YEARS, BUT HE ALWAYS BOLTS AND RUNS BEFORE EVERY HOLIDAY AND BIRTHDAY..WILL GO FROM BEING KIND TO SCREAMING AND EMOTIONALLY ASSAULTING ME (AND HIS MOM) FOR NO REASON..HE MUST BE THE CENTER OF ATTN, HE IS RECKLESS WITH HIS MONEY, JEALOUS OF EVERYONE HE MEETS AND ASSUMES THAT ME AND EVERYONE OUT THERE IS HAVING AN AFFAIR, AND MOST OF THESE PEOPLE ARE THE AGE OF MY KIDS, 25-28 AND GREW UP WITH MY KIDS..HE CAN’T HAVE A FRIEND THAT HAS A FRIEND OTHER THAN HIMSELF..FUNNY THING IS, HE WORKED IN MENTAL HEALTH FOR FIFTEEN YEARS AND I THINK HE KNOWS(HAS EVEN ADMITTED) HE HAS ALWAYS BEEN A RUNNER.. I NURSED HIM THROUGH TWO HEART ATTACKS, LET HIM STAY IN MY HOME WHEN HIS BURNED, DID ALL HIS INVENTORY ON THE BURNED HOME ETC.. AND I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT HE WAS MAD ABOUT WHEN HE LEFT…HE TELLS ME HE HAS PROBLEMS BUT MAKES NO EFFORT TO FIX THEM, IS SUPPOSED TO TAKE 10 MG ELAVIL DAILY, A BABY DOSE AND HE WON’T TAKE IT, BUT HE CAN SMOKE AN OUNCE OF MARIJUANA IN A WEEK, I BELIEVE THIS HAS SERIOUSLY ALTERED HIS PERSONALITY..HE WAS ELECTROCUTED WHEN HE WAS 21, HE IS 54 NOW, AND HIS FAMILY TELLS ME THAT AFTER THE ELECTROCUTION, HE DECIDED THE WORLD REVOLVED AROUND HIM..HE CAN’T KEEP A JOB, CAN’T WORK WITH OTHER PEOPLE, CAN’T HAVE FRIENDS ETC. HE TELLS ME HE DOESN’T PLAY SECOND TO ANYTHING OR ANYONE, AND THAT INCLUDES MY GROWN KIDS, HE IS EVEN JEALOUS OF THEM, HIS GLASS IS ALWAYS HALF EMPTY AND HE IS VERY HYPOCHONDRIACAL…ME, I HAVE MULTIPLE SCLEROSIS AND A LUMBAR FUSION FROM L-2 TO S-1, BUT I RIDE MY OWN MOTORCYCLE, HIKE, YOU NAME IT, LIFE IS TOO SHORT TO SIT ABOUT AND COMPLAIN, SOMETIMES I THINK HE IS BIPOLAR AND MAYBE HAS A NARCISISTIC TYPE A PERSONALITY TO BOOT….HE SENDS ME EMAIL, TELLING ME HOW I AM OUT THERE WITH ALL MY FRIENDS AND “CONNECTIONS” HIS WAY OF SAYING ANY MAN I KNOW OR HAVE EVER KNOWN, WHILE HE HAS NO SIGNIFICANT OTHER, HE IS HOMELESS AND HAS NOTHING OUT THERE TO LIVE FOR…I FEEL BAD FOR HIM, BUT I BELIEVE I DESERVE A LIFE, AND HE DOESN’T SEEM TO CARE IF HE HAS ONE…I HAVE ENJOYED YOUR WRITINGS VERY MUCH AND EVEN IF IT’S SOMETHNG ELSE THAT’S GIVING HIM THE OUTBURSTS, AND ALL AROUND GENERALLY BAD OUTLOOK I HAVE STILL LEARNED ALOT…AS A NURSE I DEALT WITH ALOT OF BIPOLAR PEOPLE SINCE NEUROLOGY AND PSYCHIATRY ARE SORT OF SISTER PRACTICES..THANK YOU FOR THE INFO….BEVERLY COOMBS/JARHEADBRAT1957@YAHOO.COM
I use T-Mobile and their customer service is GREAT. I don’t suffer blackouts at all. I even get 1,000 anytime minutes between four FAMILY cell phones for less than $90 a month and had free phones to boot. (Not a paid commercial. I really am a satisfied customer.)
Also, thanks, Dave, for sharing all your insights here. I really appreciate the encouragement. Your personal stories make the valuable info and encouragement so much more interesting and rememberable too! :o)
Hello Dave,
The worst thing has possibly happened–I wrote you a really meaningful message and since I had no password yet it erased this long message. I am new to sending a message to you and know how busy you must be. I hope you personally read this message as it would mean alot to me. I cannot duplicate all the things I wanted to say, but I have been diagnosed with Bipolar I disorder last May 2006. I already have 5 hospitalizations since and Iam frightened to think I will have many more. Two of these hospitalizations were due to serious suicide attemps. My marriage is in jeopardy, my finances in shambles so I cannot afford your basic course. I am awaiting admission to a 28 day treatment facility, and I hope they admit me soon so I don’t change my mind. I would appreciate a response from you personally, although I find it highly unlikely due to your heavy schedule. I guess for now I will have to settle with your daily emails as I look forward to read them. Thank you so much for your caring nature after all you have been through with your mom’s illness. I am trying so hard to manage my illness, but it is wearing me out literally. I have so much pain inside and don’t have much of a support system right now. I feel I am a burden to others and don’t even recognize myself anymore. It’s strange to look into the mirror and can’t see the relection I have come to know, but someone who is the opposite of my own image. I feel lost and can’t find my way. I hate what this disease has taken away from me.
Sincerely,
Erica
Dear Dave,
Can a person be cured of bipolar??
I have a friend who everyone says (including her) that she is bipolar. But she is also a drinker. In one of her drinking bouts she told me that she is not bipolar. She has cause us a lot of trouble and even had a friend of mine arrested for hitting her. He didn’t she fell when she was drunk and then got a black eye took pictures of it and then had him arrested after 3 weeks with just the pictures shown to the police. We are heading for court and she will not change her testimony. She really believes this is what happened.
I am so glad that I found you on here and I have a lot of your info so helpful but I hope you can help me now
Thanks
Donna Eaton
Thanks for e-mail’s, If anyone lives in Maryland I have found the most amazing Parm/Physc/therapist in one…He was at Sheppard Prattt for 15 years and have done more reasearch on the medication than anyone i’ve met, he is also tryingf to change DR’s reps, by constant e-mails in beginning (I was diagonsed Bi/I Manic rapid…Ist visit, and twp straght years of telling drs I was insomnic, then would be depressed
Jack Vaeth (It rhymes w/ Faith).
1-443-881-1411
Good Luck
Jennifer English
Annapolis
Sorry, forgot to spell-check, am only in 4th week of being diagnosed, already went off 1 med (seraquel) and after three days tried to commit suicide, thank god my husband woke up!!!
I am now on abilify and Zoloft, but still adjusting amounts….but am no longer getting down, just still have manic episodes.
Thanks again
Jennifer E
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Well Dave, this is a great technique and I’m sure that we can figure this out very quikly during a regular session as supporters. A lot of thanks for this valuable information. Also, changing words, I’m sure that many people have the same troubles with their cell phones as you and me; So, for your good health, take it easy!
Why is is that bipolar people need to self medicate themselves with marijuana and alcohol? How do you get them to stop using these horrible alternatives and get them to want to get better help in managing their disorder?
There is no one in my circle of current friends who has EVER seen me in a manic episode. Although I’ve told my boyfriend I am BP, the only behavior he’s seen that he attributes to BP behavior, is the fact that I cheated on him (for sex only), and then took him back, TWICE. He is genuinely interested in “caring” for me through what he considers an “episode.” My therapist thinks he is the proverbial “caregiver,” as his last lady-love had cancer, and he “nursed” her through three years of therapy before she died.
The major way I know I’m going into a manic episode is – that I feel I am invicible; I’m “on top of the world;” I am constantly “high;” and that I am “God-driven.” I have not felt these feelings in a VERY long time. I don’t know if any of my friends would recognize this as aberrant behavior now or not.
I am a caring, compassionate, sensual, friendly, and open person. It’s just that these characteristics are sooo much more evident in an episode. I wish I DID have a supporter who could use your advice from today’s email. That would make it sooo much easier to recognize if I AM really going into an episode, or acting verrrry normal:)
Thank you for today’s email; but at this time, it really doesn’t apply to me.
How did the person normally treat people
What type of language did the person normally use
How kind was he/she
Did he/she curse
Did he/she curse in a mean way towards you
Did he/she yell at you
Was he/she caring?
These is the type of words I got when I was working for a company that doesn’t care for people.
They just care in how much they can get out of you and then they send you off… you know… like not caring at all. I was diagnosed with an NOS bipolar disorder syndrome. I didn’t know anything at all at the time and why I was getting weird stuff coming my way all my life… 43 years by now. Feeling like a nut cracked by now. I understand where all that crap came to me ever since. Into what extent bipolar can be diagnosed and for how long could be traced.
Now I am thinking again what the Doc told me in 94′ and I didn’t pay any atention whatsoever, they even gave a bunch of pills and I though that that was veru stupid and I told my Mom to thrown them away, because pills caused me constipation and I have a mayor endoscopy for it, I hated pills ever since. And now you telling to take those pills again, you know what I did I start smoking dop to level off things up. You know the rest, mess after mess, after mess.
Now I am getting a feeling that everything is going to blown off in my sadly, messy, spoky, Gods knows what I going through these days. I am sober now with my fingers crossed. Waiting to who is the next to try to blow away my dream… a wife, a work, a life for goodness sake.
Am I at the end of my rope? provably, I have provably torndown all my bridges. Am I ready I don’t know, but you know what, I don’t even know you, I provably won’t ever meet you, but you have some words that inspired me. I understand now. Thanks Dave. I can face anything, and I don’t have to feel ashamed of.
Don’t spell out my english, is bad. Sorry.
Sincerely
Edd Gaspar
my son stays in and out of jail and is heading for prison before he gets out of 1 mess he is in another 1 he has fits of screaming and cursing me and he back tracks his self he say ther is nothing wrong with him and he don’t need help he is 25 years old. does this mean he is bipolar? how can i get a judge to listen to me so i can get him the right kind of help? i don’t believe prison will help.please respond!!
I liked your commment about having to deal with the phone company being similar to having to manage 100 bipolar episodes. You have summed up my experience with my cell phone carrier. Thanks for the laugh!
I really appreciate your information, and would get the course but for the price.
I am Bipolar/ADHD and so are my four teenage children. My half sister is Schitzophrenic and my older daughter is showing signs of it.
My girls, one 17 and one 18 refuse to take their medication, saying they don’t need it. They admit to others they are bipolar, but think they can control it themselves. The doctor even “dropped them” because they wouldn’t take their meds, AND they refuse therapy totally.
Problem is, one is trying to get a license to drive, which scares the H*** out of me; the other is a full-time student and is working full time until 2pm. She has been working a whole two weeks! Now she is planning on quitting, not just going part time. This is her first job.
Yesterday was the beginning of her last year in school (she’ll be 19 in December), and she totally blew it off saying she “quit” because her hair wouldn’t cooperate. She went in today, but now she is trying to “quit” work.
I don’t know how to handle her. She is disrespectful, cursing me and everyone else, says she doesn’t care about anything, sleeps all day when she doesn’t want to get up for school, and won’t leave the house until her hair, clothes, etc are absolutely perfect; which means she misses the bus and expects me to drive 15 miles there and 15 back because she won’t get out the door. By the time she leaves, I’m exhausted from her cursing and screaming at everyone.
I have enough difficulty keeping my son, who is also bipolar and was hit by a speeding car February 2006, and myself straightened out. I don’t know how to deal with her anger and lack of desire for life.
She got paid last week, went to Canada, where the legal drinking age is 18, got drunk and spent her entire check of about $250! It was ladies night, so she bought a guy drinks all night. She has sex with about every guy she likes, then dumps them because she is no longer interested.
No offense, but she acts like most guys I’ve known.
And to top it all off, she doesn’t use protection, or birth control, and wants kids. God help me if she has any because she won’t be able to care for them.
So, if you have any suggestions that I can afford, perhaps you will pass them this way.
Thanks,
Lola V
PS: There is one mess of a history with our family and Bipolar/Schitzophredia/ADHD and depression in general; and a host of problems complicating them, so I am pretty desperate right now. I found out I was Bipolar just two months before my second husband passed away, so it hasn’t been easy for me. I am remarried, but he doesn’t handle this situation with my daughter too well, especially since they work for the same company on the same shift.
WOW !! You know i was struggling with my bipolar daughter and so many emotions… after reading the posts, i’m so thankful things aren’t worse !!!
JARHEADBRAT – abuse is abuse is abuse (i am a psychotherapist who does group therapy group for domestic abuse perpetratords). There is NO NO NO excuse for abuse… ever. The first time you put the person on notice that while you have sympathy, they are ALWAYS accountable for their behavior. Anyone over 21 in particular is responsible for monitoring themselves and NOT depending on us 24/7 to tell them they’re going manic and being abusive. Tons and Tons of ways to self-monitor. Certainly when the verbal abuse comes the big alarm should go off. The more you put up with the abuse “because they’re sick”; they more you give them permission to be abusive. People die because of that. So, please; do not let this damnable disease get YOU killed. Ok, that one was for the ABUSERS.
For those of you struggling to control your disease, it is so very tempting to use marijauna, alcohol, etc because of the instant relief (and for those of us dealing with an addict/alcoholic/bipolar person, its ok to be empathic, but again they have to be held accountable to their choices or they’ll just stay on that unhealthy road which ultimately makes their disease worse). My daughter struggles with this one so i witness it regularly… she seems to be on a 3-4 week cycle where she hold sit together, sleeps way too much and then out of frustration uses.
Is there a cure… for those who’ve used substances, i think it MAY be possible if they actually really stay clean for a year, they may be able to slowly come off meds.. but that’s their treatment providers discussion… and one to ask them about. If they won’t discuss it, find one who will because there is every possibility without chemicals (including alcohol) they may go into what’s called “cyclothymic” which are lower level bipolar swings that often can be managed with diet and exercise.
Initially I came on thinking how do i know those things Dave taked about when she’s used for so long, i don’t know who she is… what her “normal” is. Then I thought, wait… i do know a kinder, gentler young woman. It’s been since January now that she was diagnosed and finally in a couple weeks she’ll be hooked up with vocational rehab AND a psychotherapist. Please God, may there be some peace then.
ps for those who’ve had their response lost… copy it over into an email or word document BEFORE sending off.. just in case. Or sign into google before accessing this blog.
Dave:
Check out today’s LA Times, page A-13, article “Youths maybe over-diagnosed as BiPolar”. References Dr. Gabrielle A. Carlson, Psycologist, @ Stony Brook University, New York. Very interesting. Tuesday, 4 September 2007.
Blessings,
Charles Edward Harris
1-714-924-0399
CEH227@Yahoo.com