Hi There,

I do not have bipolar but a family member is showing signs of it. I do have a condition called chronic pain in my lower back and left foot after two botched operations. I have been ill with this for years and I have seen so many specialists. My doc likes to put me on medication and when it starts working and only needs a dose alteration he takes me off it. I am nearly at the end of my rope with this one. I have a new specialist which has a clinic 300 kms away from where I live and it takes anything up to four hours to get there. I am hoping he will take over my medication so that I can get the help I so desperately need. Regards to all, Pauline

Hi David, I have been reading your emails for some time now. Just wanted to say the my daughter’s most recent “doctor/psychiatrist” has said she has bipolar, put her on meds that he said she can “fiddle with the dosage amounts herself, and told her he sees his bipolar patients twice a year”! ! ! ! ! ! ! On top of all that, he went on a short term disability due to an episode and he has messed that up to the point that she might lose her job. Needless to say, I am ordering your Masters Program tomorrow and am expiditing shipment! She is 23 with two children 4 and 16 months, with one on the way. She has never been married and recently received a $7,000 tax refund which she spent in 2 weeks. We need your help so desparately.

Dave – I wrote the story about the bad doctors. And, I am sorry to say…it is all true. I have had several more – these are just the worst ones. No one can honestly believe that I have had so many psychiatrists, but somehow I have the ‘luck’ of finding all the bad ones. I don’t give these bad doctors more than two chances – if you know ‘something is not right about them,’ find another doctor. My advice is the longer you stay with them, the more likely they are going to make a mistake that could cost you your life.

I would like to compliment the straight forward attitude you have towards dealing with problems. It has inspired me and helped immensely in other aspects of my life as well as dealing with my husband who is now diagnosed with bipolar disorder because of my research.

In regards to finding a “good” doctor, I know this is going to sound a little hokey but, I have found gut feelings are the best indicator of wether or not someone is for you. The saying “first impressions” is a very good pointer. We have lucked out and already had a good family physician. He isn’t very knowledgeable in the psychiatric field but is very willing to listen to what my husband and I have to say about my husbands condition as I am the one who is with him the most. Now having said that, I really, really believe that you (or in this case the supporter, me) must be the most active one in the course of your own treatment. “Physician heal thy self.” With professional help and advice of course.

You must be proactive and not reactive, and not just blindly follow orders. Who knows you better than you? Do your research, follow through with keeping track of your symptoms what works and what doesn’t. Read about other’s experiences and how they reacted to different treatments, often this is a very good way to find out if you are experiencing something similar and how you might handle it. Keep your own notes! Ask the doctor for copies of everything in his file on you – it is yours and you do have a right to it. It is far easier to hand a file to a new doctor than go through everything again and possibly forget something important.

It is a way of life, much like if you want to lose weight and keep it off it is a change in the way you do things. It is very trying on the supporter(s) but if you are informed you are better able to deal with and control situations. And, you can understand and have compassion if you know what is happening to your loved one…

Hi, Dave and fellow readers,
This is my first time ever posting to a blog so I hope I’m doing it right.

First, I’ve been on your email lists for over a year now and I have found a lot of encouragement in them. I also feel challenged and motivated to find out more that can make my life and those of the ones I love better.

I felt compelled to write today in response to your post about bad doctors. I’ve had a lot of them, and they’ve not always been psychiatrists. e.g. I’ll bet a lot of people would give you horror stories (I could) about doctors in military hospitals or doctors who see children in special schools and other programs. I could tell you about them too since I grew up in institutions.

One of my psychiatrists had narcolepsy. For those who don’t know, if someone has untreated narcolepsy, they can fall asleep any time, anywhere, right in the middle of a sentence. They can’t help that; it’s an actual sleep disorder. But to admit you have it,as he did, and then not to get meds for it because he didn’t want to deal with possible side effects even though the condition made it impossible for him to be able to focus on his patients, is inexcusable. I lived for awhile with a roommate who had narcolepsy. She took her meds and was able to feel better and function much better. Narcolepsy makes you tired all the time because you may fall asleep hundreds of times a day but it is only for a moment or two or maybe five and then you’re up again so you don’t get normal sleep. I felt sorry for the doctor, in a way. But I told him he could not have any credibility with patients if he was telling them to take meds in spite of possible side effects and then not even be willing to try them himself. Can you say double standard? How could anyone have confidence in this guy? You never knew when he’d just drop into dream land (well, ok, so he never got to REM sleep but you know what I mean) and then wouldn’t get help for it? Since he fell asleep so much you knew he wasn’t getting all you were saying. At least he had a reason. A lot of doctors don’t even have that excuse. They’re either too busy having to see too many patients within a limited amount of time, which often happens to docs who work in mental health clinics, especially where a lot of patients are on MEDICAID and/or MEDICARE or can’t pay because they don’t have insurance. Before anybody starts getting defensive and biting my head off, I will say that, though it’s rare, you can still occasionally find a good doc in a place like that. Often they don’t last. Sometimes they’re first or second year docs, people who’ve done their residencies and all that but are just starting in the field, or sometimes they volunteer a portion of their time. But between the quotas of patients they must see and the short time they are allowed to see them, they often can’t do a proper evaluation and many of them leave as soon as they can and get hooked up with one or two others in a private practice or set out their own shingles in nice, cushy offices and charge $150 an hour.

I am currently in an outpatient program where I go to groups and see a therapist every day and a doc once a week and I also see the psych nurse. I won’t even touch on the therapists in this message because that’s another whole kettle of fish. But let’s just say that the psych nurse blatantly lied about a medication I was given a scrip for by the doctor. He, and the doctor, told me the drug was in a certain class of meds. I found out later from the pharmacy and from my own research that it was something else and that mixing it with another med, which the doc had also prescribed, could result in very serious problems. When I saw the doc the next week, he backpedaled, trying to say something else. When I confronted the psych nurse, he admitted he Might have told me something wrong and that he should have looked it up. I told him that given all the meds that were around I would have understood if he had wanted to look it up before he told me something or even if he had wanted to confer with the doc. But he chose to lie.

I had hoped that by seeing the doc in this program, I could avoid having to go back to the doc that charged $150 per half hour. (It wasn’t $150 an hour, I think I said that wrong. It was though $150 a half hour and $100 for twenty minutes. However, though I am on disability and have no other source of income and my previous doc wouldn’t take MEDICARE, I think it’s worth it to get someone who knows what he’s doing.

This doc at the program where I go is incompetent! I know he is. The worst part is that he is the medical director. He’s a psychiatrist but he also does therapy, though, thank God, he’s not my therapist. But he’s very arrogant, coming in when he pleases and not seeing patients as often as the program says we’re supposed to be seen. He enters by a back entrance so we never know for sure when he’s in or when he’s not. He’s just strange, and he tries to prescribe meds like mixing two benzos and things like that that nobody who knows about meds would advise, particularly when one of them has such a long half life.

Yes, there really are good doctors out there. They’re hard to find but they’re there.

Finding a ddoctor can be difficult. When I recently moved here, I wasn’t sure what I would do about a doc. None of my health care professionals from where I used to live knew of anyone in this area. But this is a major city with a lot of hospitals and a large, major university. So I knew they had to be there. I just wasn’t sure how to find them and I knew I couldn’t learn much from the Internet, nor did I want to just pick a name out of the yellow pages.

There are actually several ways to find a doctor. One is word of mouth. Dave knows this, don’t you, Dave. It may not be in your doctor finding system because it isn’t always the best way. What works for one person won’t necessarily work for another. But I’ve noticed that you always encourage us to forward your daily emails. You want us to spread good information to people we know who could benefit from it. So if I know someone who is doing well with bipolar or BPD or another mental illness or even a physical illness and I trust their recommendation, I’ll consider that doctor they recommend. Notice, I said “consider”. I might go to see the person and decide that doc isn’t for me for whatever reason. Oh yes, and I wouldn’t blame it on the friend who recommended the doc if the doc didn’t work out for me. It could be a personality conflict, the doc may have a favorite med he likes that worked on my friend but not on me etc. But that is one way to start.

When my husband was diagnosed with a rare form of pituitary cancer, he found out where research studies were being done on that kind of tumor, called leading cancer centers, particularly those where they had published articles in, say the New England Journal of Medicine, about his kind of cancer, and he contacted them, sometimes mentioning (truthfully) that he’d read about work done by some of their colleagues and/or them and volunteering to be in research studies. Sometimes he just told them he was calling on behalf of a patient with the condition and would like a consultation. Doctors called him back and he had two surgeries, one in Dallas and one in California, the latter being the most successful, and he has been in remission and cancer free for ten years.

I’m not sure it would work the same way with mental health issues. I never have been able to get hold of Dave’s doctor-finding system. I don’t know what Dave’s doctor finding system is since he does not choose to share it unless someone buys one of his paid courses. I also don’t know why you choose to hold that card, Dave, and keep it secret when some of us, some who have the least money and/or insurance coverage and who need the help the most, can’t buy your courses. Maybe you do address finding a doctor in your latest bipolar guide. I hope so. I can’t buy it though for two reasons. One is that my husband would probably consider it a waste of money (notice, I said my husband, not me, since I stay on your email list and obviously find your materials helpful) and because of the times during episodes when I’ve made unwise financial decisions, he controls the money.

Speaking, Dave, of your products, why don’t you offer a question certificate with your new book for bipolar survivors? Don’t they need and deserve consultations just as much as their supporters do? Some don’t have supporters. Many feel lonely and isolated. No matter how good a printed guide is, many people still want to know that a live person cares enough about them to help them, to stand behind both his product and his customer by giving a little personal service. Just a thought.

Another thing I wonder is why you don’t make your written materials, like your new bipolar survivors guide and your little booklets explaining bipolar and borderline personality disorder, into PDF files which could then be purchased and then downloaded in what they’re now calling EBook form? There are several benefits to this, most of which you probably know but I’ll enumerate some of them anyway in case you don’t.

First, you avoid all of the hassle of printing, packaging and shipping the material.
Second, the buyer can download and begin reading the materials almost immediately, like within seconds, after the order has processed. Most people have the Adobe Acrobat program which can play the PDF downloadable documents and if they don’t have it, the program is available free and it could be put on your website so they could get it right there if they didn’t have it, though most do.
Another benefit: You could reach people like me who can not read printed documents but can, with special software, access PDF documents.

Oh, my husband still wouldn’t let me buy your stuff. I’ve already bought a few Ebooks that he thinks I paid too much money for.

The thing about EBooks though is that a lot of people really do buy them. I don’t know if you know about Julie A. Fast (probably a pseudonym but I don’t know) who has developed something she calls the “health cards system”. It sells for $49 on her bipolar happens web site. She is a bipolar survivor and has written several books, one is called “Getting it Done When You’re Depressed (her newest) and one is called something like Living with and Loving Someone who is b’ipolar or something like that. Her system is in EBook form and sells for $49. Most of her books are in regular printed form and cost what most printed books cost. With the health cards system though, she gives a discount to those on disability and they can get it for $10. They can then copy and use the cards with family, health care providers etc. I am not necessarily recommending her system since I haven’t been able to buy it and am not sure it is something I’d need. But it is something that people can use right away. If I remember correctly, and I haven’t checked her site in awhile, the health cards come with several other documents, including success stories, different ways to use the health cards, etc. It might be a good additional resource for bipolar supporters and survivors.

I have another question. Are you going to be coming out with a guide for people with borderline personality disorder survivors? I’ve been diagnosed with bipolar for years but only about a week ago got the BPD diagnosis. now, I’m scrambling to find information on BPD. I’ll bet there are a lot of other people who would be able to use such a guide.

Having said all this, I am going to be reading your borderline personality site a lot today and also have downloaded your overview of mental illness and will look at the info there. I forgot to thank you for that. Now I remember that was from you so of course you know about Ebooks. So, can you offer your bipolar survivor guide in Ebook form for even less money? (Notice, I’m not asking you to offer it for free. I understand the importance of paying something for things. When you pay for something, you have made an investment in it. You have also had the dignity of not getting a free handout. So I’m not suggesting you offer everything for free, but that you consider offering the Ebook option.

About your little booklets, I know of many organizations who offer literature (I am not thinking at this moment of mental health organizations but of others, who offer an individual copy of a booklet for free but charge for additional copies. That way, someone gets to see what the item is like before they decide whether or not to invest in additional copies. I am planning to visit a bipolar support group and a borderline personality support group in the next two weeks. Another girl I know from my outpatient program who has had the borderline diagnosis for awhile but has never gone to a support group asked me to go with her so I said I would. I’d like to be able to check out your booklets. I know they must be of good quality and I would like to show them to people in support groups and to other mental health professionals such as my wonderful therapist and even the people in my outpatient program, though I must admit I still question the competency of some of them. Your quantity prices are very reasonable and it’s quite possible that the support groups and mental health agencies might be very interested in your booklets and then, wanting to know more, some of the patients and supporters might buy your other courses/systems. Since I don’t know I’ll ask but do you give your web address and/or other contact info in these little booklets? If you do, then people would know where to get other information.
Sorry this has been so long. I sometimes get carried away when writing, which is why I limit my posting time and don’t post often. When I do, I end up taking too much time from other things. But I am interested in what you think and hope you will comment on at least some of this either in your daily emails or in a private email to me, because there is another issue I’d like to discuss with you regarding making your materials more accessible to people, such as myself, who because of various reasons, learning disabilities, blindness, etc. can not read your printed materials. You’d be surprised at the number of blind people, for instance, who have mental illnesses. The Lighthouse for the Blind in Manhattan, for instance, has a mental health clinic for blind people. It is the only such clinic in the country thus far. New York City has the largest population of blind people in the country and its services for the blind are unparalleled. (No, I don’t live there.) In my outpatient program we have another blind person, but there have been at least four others that I know of and I know many who have mental illnesses who are not in that program but who may see other therapists. Some of them do not have computer access. I didn’t until I married my husband three years ago. I’d like to see your information available in Braille. Braille takes up a lot of room so your little booklets wouldn’t be so little then but it would be a good service and one which I could provide. If I had one of your guides, for instance, I could put it into Braille and then charge only what you would charge anyone else and you’d get money, like it would be if I were in some kind of affiliate program. Just a thought. I am trying to do this with other companies that deal with other types of information. In fact, I am working with several companies to include sections, where applicable, in their materials that would be useful specifically to blind, learning disabled or otherwise impaired individuals in their information. I have not done this in a formal way since I have not set up a company, though I have thought that if there was enough of a market, I could set up such a business at some point and charge at least enough to cover muy costs for putting things into Braille or audio format. Many blind people do not have computer access and some can not read Braille for various reasons,like lack of finger sensitivity. So it would be good to offer your information, particularly your little booklets, on a nice cassette or CD. Additionally, especially in places like where I live (TX) there would be a market for your materials in Spanish. Are you considering doing this? That is another way I could help.

Got to run. Thanks for reading.

Hello David:
Like I told you before, I am new in this subject. Actually, it was me who told my daughter she was bipolar, since I did read about the symptoms. The Dr. she was seeing told her I was crazy. I said: may be she thinks I am crazy, but you are bipolar. Months later she was told she really was. That happened after 14 years of counseling. I have not told you, but on 1992 my 15 years old daughter killed herself. I do not know if she was bipolar. I only know that the psychiatrists and psychologist that saw her told as that her behavior was related to her age. I am telling you this for you to understand that even though my daughter has been receiving help, she has been getting worst. Now, I am concern about the medication she just got for her moods: LAMICTAL ORANGE STRT KIT25MG/100MG. The information and warnings talk about SERIOUS AND SOMETIMES FATAL RASHES. Also the side effects include blurred or double vision, constipation, nausea, runny or stuffy nose, stomach upset, trouble sleeping, vomiting, or weakness or fatigue. It says also to check with your doctor if you experience difficult or painful urination, persistent sore throat,, involuntary trembling, muscle aches, painful menstrual periods or other menstrual changes, ,swelling of the hands, ankles, or feet, unusual weakness or fatigue, vaginal itch or discharge, vision changes,weight loss , missing menstrual periods, calf pain or tenderness, chest pain, dark urine, fast or irregular heartbeat, fever or chills, new or worsening mental or mood changes (such as anxiety, depression, restlessness,irritability, panic attacks, new or worsening seizures, pale stols, red, swollen or blistered skin, severe or persistent stomach pain, severe muscle pai or tenderness, shortness of breath, sores in the mouth or around the eyes, suicidal thoughts or attempts,swelling of your hands. legs,face, lips, eyes. throat, tongue, difficulty swallowing or breathing, hoarseness, swollen lymph glands, unusual bruising or bleeding, yellowing of the eyes or skin. Allergic reaction to this medicines is unlikely, but seek inmediate medical attention if it occurs. Symptoms include itching, hives, severe dizziness, swelling, or trouble breathing. An, if you notice other effects no listed above, contact your doctor, nurse or pharmacist.
I believe that with all the mentioned side effects, this medication it is mos a risk that a help. my daughter has lost a lot of weight. I wander if any one there is taking this medicine. Please answer me. I am really concerned and worried.

My 13 year old granddaughter has GREAT doctors.They work very close together in her treatment plan.Last month she became suicidal,the therapist saw her every day for 2 weeks,even on his day off.We have his cell phone number,and he has told our grand- daughter and us to call anytime day or night that we need him. He works closely with the school on what they can do to help.The doctors instantly knows if the medication is working or not, and adjustments are made.I can call the doctors if there is a problem, and they will get us into the office.They have helped us find a support group,helped with paperwork,and offered to testify in court that our grand-daughter’s mother can only have supervised visits,because of mental abuse.

I know what it’s like to have bad doctors, and to have loved ones who have seen bad doctors. My mother, when she was alive, had seen one for several months at a time that put her on 14 different kinds of medication for the entire week: some were placebos, some were to counter-act the effects of others, and some were to treat certain symptoms without actually helping the cause. I have come to realize that the medication does no good, and that the best thing to do is implement procedures to keep your life operating smoothly when you have a manic, or depressive, mood-swing. Unfortunately, most of the doctors I have encountered are not very proficient in their chosen profession…

-D-

Well so far I have been lucky as far as my primary doctor and my couselor. But on Wednesday I am going to see a new doctor for a phyc evaluation. I was told she is good, but is “dry” as far as personality goes. I am very nervous. I did have my couselor explain to my boyfriend what was going on with me which helped so much. My parents are having a hard time understanding though.

My partner’s first doctor was dreadful. He’d had a nervous breakdown himself and decided that ALL mental health issues could be solved if you “pulled yourself together”. He would withhold meds and tease my partner by demanding he make appointments, then ask why he was there when he turned up. This was in a very small village, and when the doctor saw my partner in the local pub he would start discussing his condition in front of everyone else in the pub. Personally I think he should have been struck off!

We then moved to London and we found a much better doctor who changed my partners meds and he’s been unbelievably stable since then.

The problem we now have is that we have moved out of the area and my partner is currently still travelling down for his appointments as we’re too afraid to switch doctors. The new surgery nearest to us does not allocate a particular doctor to a patient so you get whoever is there when you go in. I’ve tried to explain to them that this won’t work for my bipolar partner but they don’t understand what I am saying. So I think we will be pretending to be at our old address for a while yet unfortunately!

I have had many psychiatrists who I have never got to know cause they never stay with me long enough,. The NHS changes here in the UK mean that I have beeen assigned a new psychiatrist on nearly every visit to the hospital. the leep their distance and I never get to know them and they never get to know me – or how to help me

I have tried so many different medications, some of which ease the depression a little but only for a while. I have jsut started seeing a CBT therapist which I have ben waiting to do for a while but I have my doubts about the surface nature of CBT.

But I’ll see how it goes

Thanks

Jo

My son has had a bipolar disorder since he was 17 (he is 35 now). Over the years, we have experienced many such “bad” doctoring, but I think the worst was a psychiatrist in Houston who after seeing him one time, told us to put him in the state hospital and “forget about him.” She said he had “fried his brain,” and would never be well. Now, 17 years later, he has had many good years, as well as some really bad ones, he got through 3 years of college, has held several jobs. His life will never be what it could have been, but he is slowly learning to cope with the illness, which is the trickiest and the meanest sickness that I know.

Hello DAve I got your information from my boyfriends email he is my support as I don’t have family left or they just choose not to deal with me the problem. you are soooooooooooo right abouyt the mental health and doctors and how they treat Manic deppression or bipolar disorder. Just the other day I had a doctor tell me that she didn’t think that I had bipolar but yet she still prescribed me medication to treat something that she was in her mind uncertian that I had So what are you treating me for I asked? Of course no answer.She just moved on to the next subject as I sat there thinking to myself what other subject?Either Your treating me for something I have or not. She just suggested at that piont that I look into a drug or aaa program. Ok I said And I have the whole thing here is that I have had this problem since I was In my teens Unnoticed and I know what works for me as far as meds and such and why they don’t listen too us is beyond me. I am not crazy refuse to except that. So I also want to mention to that this was also through a county agency. County mental haelth. I also know that there are insurence companies that will excpet you with pre- exsisting conditions. Some might be worth looking into might want to pass that on?I am in california so I don’t reall have that much to say on that part but I DO THAT IT MAKES A DIFFERENCE.mY E MAIL IS TYMEK1@YAHOO.COM AND THIS FROM WRENCHTWIST@SBCGLOBAL.NET

I have a question, I have recently applied for health insurance and have been refused. I have been seeing a doctor for about two years and have been told that i have anxiety and depression. I have went through a multitude of different med’s, but have for the last year been on only one and am very satisfied and consistent with it. I found out today that my doctor has put in my medical record’s that i am bipolar which has made the insurance comp. refuse me. I have never been told by my doc at anytime of this and feel that i have been lied to and do not know what to do. If there is anyone out there that has been in this situation please contact me , i feel as though i should retain a lawyer and no longer have the trust in my doctor and do not know what to do! PLEASE HELP ME IF YOU CAN !!!!!!♠