Bipolar: Where Do We Go From Here?

Hi,

I’m sure you’ve read about people who have started off with not much in life…Or had really bad starts in life…But rose above their bad backgrounds to become successful in spite of them? Well, it’s like the same thing can happen with bipolar disorder. Or, at least, specifically, getting the diagnosis of bipolar disorder. How come one person can get the diagnosis of bipolar disorder and never seem to rise above it…Learning how to manage it…Becoming stable…Becoming high-functioning…Becoming productive…Becoming happy…Becoming successful. While another person with the same diagnosis of bipolar disorder never seems to rise above it…Never learning how to manage it…Going from episode to episode…Never becoming high functioning…Never becoming stable…Never becoming productive…Never becoming happy…Never becoming successful.

What’s the difference? One of the things is what it takes to become stable. See…First you get the diagnosis of bipolar disorder…And then you have to ask yourselves: where do we go from here? And then it’s basically up to you and your loved one. They can choose to be in denial, for one thing. And that will cause them to fail at stability. In other words…They can deny that they even have bipolar disorder. They can say that the doctor/psychiatrist is wrong about them. Or they might take the medication until they feel better…And then believe that they’re “cured…”

And then want to stop their medication. That’s a form of denial, too. A very dangerous form.

Because if they stop their medication…They’ll go into a bipolar episode. Maybe not right away, because the medication may stay in their system for a while…But it will happen. Because one of the things about bipolar disorder is that there is NO cure for it at the moment. (so even though they “feel better,” they are NOT cured) But there IS treatment. And treatment consists of medication and therapy.

But they need to stay on that medication so they continue to feel better and so that their mood swings are regulated and they stay out of bipolar episodes. Without that medication, that just isn’t going to happen. And they will fail at their efforts at stability. Pure and simple. But the person who continues to take their medication and comply with treatment, WILL succeed at stability.

Well, I have to go!

Your Friend,

Dave

  1. This is absolutely correct. My sister is bipolar, and she was on meds for 17 years. She went to counseling on and off, but we are Adult Children of Alcoholics (both parents) and she never did any recovery work for that, no did she go to any groups for bipolar. So, the counseling didn’t keep her stable during some really rough times, and the depression set in several times, and it was difficult to get out of with the meds being carefully modified and counseling (because she was so depressed). We experienced a few manic episodes, but the meds kept it from getting out of control. Until last November, when, in her mild manic episode, she went off some of her meds. That led to a very costly mania, both emotionally for all her family and financially for her. She was in Hawaii and none of us could help her. Fortunately she went into a “healing center” which I believe convinced and encouraged her to go back on her meds… but it took time and much damage has occurred to all of our relationships. Perhaps this will be a wake-up call that she needs to work her recovery program (which was structured while she was in a treatment center for severe depression, which believes in 12 step recovery programs). I am attending ACA meetings and they have been so helpful to me through all of this, not to mention working on my own recovery. Her only child has had a very hard life, and her suicide threats on New Years, while manic, were very difficult for him to handle, with no way to help her and her indicating he was responsible. I hope anyone reading this will understand the importance of not only staying on their meds, but seeking good counseling and “working their program”, because no one can do it for them, and it takes all of that.

  2. My son is bi polar, lives with us,his parents, is 35 years old. In the last 9 years of his life he has been arrested for DUI and was sober for 6 years. As of April 8th, he has been arrested for possession of drugs and is on probation. He is now doing the 90 days 90 meetings in NA. How does he rise above these convictions? He sees a psychologist, takes medications, is on SSI–can’t hold a full time job or even get a part time job. How does he rise above this? He has no to little self esteem. He was once an intelligent, humorous, fun person to be around. Now is a real downer–never happy–never satisfied with anything in his life. Actually he has no life. No friends, no car–just mom and dad to help him in any way he needs. How does he arise above this.
    Who can help this desperate family? How do we arise above this?

  3. See life through the eyes of a child. Episodes are only generally seen in tv world. Keanu Reeves (has been told he is the chosen of the Matrix – his life is upside down, he doesn’t understand what these people are pulling him into); his girlfriend however from Zion (the Bliss Planet) understands his maladjustment and tries to transition him towards where he must be (he is on a journey) Their real world is yet to be discovered or experienced.

    If you’ve been cursing like a sailor, stop the helicopter route and apologize to your girlfriend — her sister probably hints it

    If you are owed plenty of apologies from supporters of those with bipolar, take courage! Dealing with people with ailments is not a destination is a path that must be taken to get to where one must be….believe it or not this very disfunctional environment is what is leading to the where one must be.

    That’s why I am always travelling….i have arrived yet and once I have, I’ll “be the first to know”!

    Goodness and Mercy (the neighbor and favored kin)shall lead….to being still

  4. so well spoken but how do you convince a mental ill person they need to be on medication… my son after going on a bipolar episode a month ago is now in a locked pych center and is still making me out to be the bad guy even though he owes me thousands of dollars and has recently said my old computer I let him borrow has been stolen (so now all my personal info is out there yipee) refuses to admit he is bipolar…what next? I as a mother can’t take much more…tough love on my first born……….I’m doing it…it hurts but I have to learn that he is 35 years old and an adult and should after numerous visits to ER’s and being stabbed in the face with a screwdriver should “get it” cuz he KNOWS he has a mental problem but won’t admit it…oh well..because he is “locked up” I sleep at night at this point until he is released and we “start all over again” his father (who I divorced years ago) has a restraining order on him (well that’s a easy way out) now “out of sight out of mind” so my son may “hate me” because I did this and that or whatever… but I do love him and I’m just trying to figure it out…I hate tough love……he needs to accept that he is mentally ill and needs to be on medication. At this point he is fighting that point. It’s just so sad.

  5. the above comment is very true, i have a loved with the disorder and right now is successful due to medicine, therapy and the support of loved ones, but the disease is always present

  6. I agree that bipolar ilness cannot be cured and all that are diagnosed with it have to remain on long term medication but the long and short of it all is that it takes a while to find the right type of medication for all sufferers of the illness because we have different body chemistries and it is ususally the adverse side effects of the medications that make sufferes stop taking the medication and not neccesarrily because they belive they have been cured after recovering from an episode for for me I really want to maintain stability and become as productive as I can and make up for the years that the caterpillar and the cankerworm have eaten because of the illness before it is time up for life is short but interesting and worth living.

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