Bipolar Warning. Are you doing this? Hope not.

==>>Help with ALL aspects of bipolar disorder<<==
Check out all my resources, programs and information
for all aspects of bipolar disorder by visiting:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/catalog.asp

Hi,

How’s it going?

I have an important thing to
tell you today about bipolar
disorder. I actually think it’s
one of the biggest problems people
face.

Before I tell you, I will tell
you how I thought about it.

Yesterday was a Saving Private
Ryan day for me.

What’s that? Well if you saw the movie
Saving Private Ryan, the opening
seen is really disturbing.

It’s kind of like a World War II movie.
Anyway, the US military is in a big boat
coming to shore for D-day in 1945. The boat door
opens and like 50% of the people in the boat
are shot and killed immediately. In the movie
they scramble to try not to get shot and killed
and get to the land.

When I have days when I wake up with
tons of problems and complaints, I call
them saving private ryan days.

There are days I get up and with this
bipolar stuff I feel like I have 50 to
80% of my troops shot and killed and
I have to retreat.

If you are a bipolar supporter, you might
find that you have saving private ryan days–
that is days when you have so many problems
from bipolar disorder, you want to run and
hide.

Anyway, yesterday was one of those days.

I had one lady that has called me
21 times demanding I return her call. She
has not left her phone number however.
Each message is more and more angry
and demanding.

I had another person threaten me.

I had one person mad at a daily bipolar
email that I sent.

I had another person call over and
over again on my cell phone.

I had another person super mad me
about my daily bipolar email yesterday.
She said:

“David! I can’t believe you are promoting
goal setting. Goal setting is the worst
thing ever. It’s a bunch of hype and I can’t
believe you are selling it. I am ashamed to
know you. I can’t believe you.”

DO> I got this and I am so confused, I don’t
even know what to say? Who the heck gets
mad about talking about goal setting????
NOTE-This is person is a bipolar supporter.

I had another person fax me a million
times yesterday with pages that make
no sense at all.

It took me hours and hours to sort out
all this stuff.

I was talking to Michele, and she was
saying, “I have no idea how you put
up with this all.”

Sometime days I ask myself that.

BUT, it’s days when I help just one
person that makes it all worth it.

I was talking to a person who
had filled out a free consultation
certificate that comes with my courses/systems
below:

SUPPORTING AN ADULT WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarsupporter.com/report11

SUPPORTING A CHILD/TEEN WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarparenting.com

HAVE BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.survivebipolar.net

for non medication and non legal questions
because I am not a doctor, therapist, or lawyer.

She wanted to talk about goal setting
for the new year.

She really wanted to change her life
and do well with bipolar disorder.
We talked about what she thought had
been going wrong. She insisted that she
had tried everything. Then since she
has been on my mailing list she said
well not everything but a lot of things.
She knew that I would ask her if she
had tried millions of possibilities–
which she had not so she quickly changed
the everything to a lot of things 🙂

So we talked for a while and I asked
her some hard questions after I said,
“Do you want me to tell you what you
want to hear or what you need to hear?”

I asked the hard questions:

Do you have a good doctor?

Do you listen to your doctor?

Are you 100% honest with your doctor?

Do you go when you are suppose to go?

Do you have a good therapist, go, and listen?

Do you believe you can get better and be
stable?

Do you have your finances protected?

Have you looked for a job to help pay
for things?

Are you avoiding drinking alcohol?

I heard yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, etc.

Then after I really grilled her I heard:
no, but, no, but, no, but, no, but

After the buts were excuses, I told her
to just keep them to herself because I didn’t
want to hear them. These were yes or no questions.

Then eventually I just didn’t say anything other
than, “Do you see why your 2007 was a disaster?”

She said, “yes, you know, Dave. I kind of lie
to myself all the time.”

Then we talked and she was really going to follow
through. I really believe she will.

It’s odd because on Christmas, my friend
John who I talked about yesterday was
telling me about the problem this person
is experiencing–lying to herself. He said he
can’t believe how many people lie to themselves.

He said and I quote, “It’s hard to believe
how many people lie to themselves. It’s bad
enough that big companies and government
lies to you but when you lie to yourself,
that’s really sad.”

I asked him what he meant. He said that
insurance people lie all the time about how
much work they have down, how hard they have
worked, how many prospects they have talked to,
etc.

NOTE-My friend John is a top insurance broker.

Anyway, he said it leads to total failure. He also
told me how many people contact him and say they
can’t do well in the industry. He asks the hard
questions. They say, yes, yes, yes, yes when in
reality the answers are no, no, no, no, no if
they are honest with themselves which he says 99% of
people aren’t.

Then I started telling him how bipolar supporters
and bipolar survivors lie to themselves all the
time.

When someone has bipolar disorder and isn’t
doing well, I ask questions like:

Did you really take your medication?

Do you have a good doctor?

Do you listen to him/her and see her regularly?

Do you have a good therapist? See him/her?

Did you really get the right amount of sleep?

Did you really do what you are suppose to do?

Are you really trying to get better?

I find many times I get into arguments with
people with bipolar disorder and they say
yes, yes, yes and it’s really no, no, no.

Then they have 1 million reasons to justify
why they have so many no, no, nos. If you
have been on the phone with me or in person
you’ll probably notice how I just never
want to hear excuses.

I was speaking to a person named Mike. He told
me he has no hope. There is no doctor or medication
that can help him. I spoke to him for like an
hour. Don’t know why, he just called me and I had
some time.

Eventually he admitted that guess what?

He doesn’t take his medication, he stay up
half the week watching tv, he doesn’t really
go to therapy and he doesn’t think he could
get better. BUT, he argued with me and tried
to sell me on he was a total disaster and there
was no hope and he tried everything.

He was lying to himself.

Then I spoke to a bipolar supporter.

She said there is no hope for her husband.

I asked:

Did you try to find a doctor using my system

Did you listen to all the cds?

Did you read all my bipolar supporter materials?

Did you find a therapist using my method?

Did you setup systems to protect your finances?

Did you get a different job like I recommended?

Did you send signs and symptoms to the doctor/therapist?

Did you go over the section on how to handle your
loved one’s mood swings and anger?

I heard yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. After 20 minutes
it turned to, “well I didn’t do that but I couldn’t
do that because…I couldn’t read everything because I didn’t
have time…I didn’t listen to all the cds because… We couldn’t
use your doctor system because we didn’t have time.”

I said, “it’s amazing how you told me for 20 minutes
the opposite of what you are telling me now.”

She said, “well you are right.”

In my head, I thought, “Man, she is lying to herself.”

She then told me that she had to get serious
and stop lying to herself that she was doing way
more than she really was.

There are many people that lie to themselves. My dad
did it a lot. He would say he tried everything to help
my mom. But he really didn’t. Today he admits that he
really didn’t but didn’t know what to do.

My mom use to lie to herself about what she was doing
for her illness. She would say, “I am doing everything.”

She didn’t do 20% of what she was suppose to do
back in the day.

I lied to myself all the time from 1997 through
2005. I would give my mom a ton of money and lie
to myself by saying it was being managed well
and everything was okay. I would just keep telling
myself that. I remember my brother asking if
I knew where all the money was going and I said,
“Oh, yea, she needs it, it’s going to legitimate
bills?”

Lying to yourself is deadly. It’s a huge problem. Don’t
do it. Be honest with yourself. When you do, good
things will happen.

Even though I am going to get hate mail about
talking about goal setting for 2008, I am going
to talk about it. Sorry. It’s important. You
can’t set goals if you aren’t honest with
yourself.

Hey, I just looked at the clock, I have to run.

Catch you tomorrow. Oh, tomorrow is the bipolar
disorder news. See you.

Your Friend,

Dave

P.S. Don’t forget to take a look through the
different programs I’ve put together… each one is designed
to help you with a different area of bipolar disorder whether
you have it or you are supporting someone with it.
You can see them all and get the details by visiting:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/catalog.asp

P.P.S. Check out my Free blog with copies of emails
that I have sent in the past and lots of great
information for you:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/supporterblog/

P.P.P.S Check out my Free podcast. Hear me give
mini seminars designed to teach you information
you can’t learn anywhere else.
http://bipolarcentral.libsyn.com

  1. Dave,
    Ater my boyfriend has an episode and returns back to “himself” he says…”Jod, I’ve been lying to myself” over and over “Jod, I’ve been lying to myself.” Thanks for all your support Dave. If it weren’t for you…I’d probably be lying to myself, a lot!!

  2. Hi, Dave
    I just wanted to make sure there was at least one email on here today that reminds you that you are doing an absolutely heroic job of fighting on the FRONT LINES of a terrible and insidious disease that 90% of the population doesn’t know squat about. It’s a disease that ruins marriages and families and takes lives, and you have made tremendous inroads against this horrible enemy. I will always credit you with saving my marriage from ruin. When lots of people write you to tell you you are all wrong about whatever, just remember this: Results speak for themselves. I thank God for giving you the passion for this work that he has. And I know there are many, many people out there who feel the same way I do. Keep fighting the good fight. You win more soldiers over to your side every day.
    Liz

  3. Wow you know I was half considering electro shock therapy since I felt I was a totally lost cause. I have some yes’s and some no’s and yes everything excuse in the book. I do lie to myself and didn’t even realize it. I think i will shower and get dressed today. Call my doc and run errands, I can do this, we all can.

  4. Dave,
    I think you are right on about lying to yourself but it not only applies to Bi Polar disorder but to all areas of life. I wanted to blame my wife and her disorder on our marital problems when in reallity I wasn’t doing the things I should have been doing. I was telling myself I was doing all that I could and I wasn’t. Now that I’ve been honest with myself we are happily back together and very much in love. But this situation has come up again because my wife’s sister and her husband are having problems and she is blaming us and our children for the problems they are having. She isn’t looking inside herself to try to see what the real problem is. Don’t give up on your work, the few that are out there that say that you are out of your mind arn’t really the many, they just voice it when they don’t agree. When my wife and I set goals we find that we often exceed our goals because we have a focus and we do our best to get them done. Thank you for all the advice you leave in my in box.

  5. Good Morning David,

    I have type II bipolar so in a way I’m lucky! I’m writing this note to offer you support.

    At first I was disgusted with your emails but you’re getting through to me! I’ve lost a marriage, a friendship, and now possibly another relationship to bipolar.

    I haven’t bought your system yet, but I will. I’m changing and growing more healthy every day and I am convinced that you will be a big part of my new happier existence!

    Take Care of yourself,

    Amy

  6. Dave,

    Thanks again. I heard about goal setting in the spiritual forum yesterday as well. You are so right about the enormous amount of dishonesty that people seem to use ON THEMSELVES!! It’s disastrous and it comes from pride, in a lot of instances. Thanks for taking the time and many of your resources in assisting us with this horrible illness. I really appreciate all that you do.

    The Princess

  7. I have lived with and supported a bi polar (who was bi polar before I came along) for 13 yrs his Mom is bi polar too. I am tired drained sick of it. We are in such debt from the episodes he is head of household and can be violent so I stay calm and try to sneak in bill paying when I can. My older children have seeen it all. We move all the time he has grand schemes I am not moving anymore so far away. His biggest issues are lying and the woooooo is me he needs sympathy his family babies him but I cant its making him so weak. ONe day he says yup I have bi polar the next he says I never said that. I have the courses from Dave and other books and info both families his and mine think I am nuts I am beginning to feel that way!!!! Mental illness is such an embarrasing thing people will say its not there that person is fine. aaauuuuggghhhh He does get violent off his meds and the police were called when it got too bad he beat my son and then yelled at the cops but to this day he was forced to leave HIS home I hear it over and over. Being off meds and drinking doesnt mix duh I know that but hes a big guy I will not mess with him. I want a real life you know not the spinning circle one. I know if I go its with no money he was in huge debt before he met me and cant hold onto a dime now but thats ok with me peace is better than money. He wont let me have my things thats ok we move so much every time he has a grand scheme that I dont have much left. I am NOT moving anymore during his rash episodes. I have come to my end of it and seeing where I was a co dependent for years and took him back everytime OFF his meds drinking no job (always after being kicked out of where he was crashing) I should of said whoa lets get you right I have children here I have myself to think of too. Thanks for listening to me vent!!!! dtdubois

  8. dtdubois,

    Hang in there for you and your children. I know your frustration. Do you work or have a way of supporting yourself? Get from under the control of your bipolar loved one. You KNOW he’s bipolar and irrational. Someone has to be sane! It’s got to be you. Don’t entertain anything that he says to you. Bipolar’s that don’t take their meds and are in an episode are NEVER the problem. That’s common knowledge. Believe in you and handle your business. Stop negotiating with your loved one. He is not well. Don’t threaten and tell him what you are going to do. DO IT. Take control of you and your children’s life. Please implement Dave’s material. It will work. Start with you. Peace

  9. Dave,
    I am dealing with myself , my husband ,and my 6 year old daughter with Bipolar.I want to hide in a small hole sometimes. But, I take that BIG deep breath and say it is going to be ok.But, here latley I can deal with my 6 year old and husband but, all I want to do is cry,cry,cry,cry! Can you send some helpful advice for me cause I am tring to be STRONG.

  10. Hi Dave,

    Everything that I have read from all your emails and materials are 100% true and are all valuable. I have been supporting my wife with her bipolar for over 10 years. My wife’s Bipolar comes from the fact she has LUPUS and bipolar is one of the wonderful bonuses included with the disease, so it has been double hard for us as we have to control a horrible disease in LUPUS and an even more horrible disease in bipolar at the same time. Goals are very important only because it forces your loved one to honestly say I have things wrong with me and in my life and they won’t get corrected until I do something about them. Remember that the disease can not be controlled by talking it requires action, by you, by doctors, and by our loved ones in following what our doctors tell us we need to do and what medications need to be taken. Bipolar cannot be controlled without medical help or medications!!!! Never think for one second that because our loved one is out of an episode that the meds can stop or be backed off of that is FALSE. When you love someone it requires work everyday to keep the relationship strong, and the same is true for contolling bipolar. Just remember that helping control the bipolar and doing all of the things that are necessary to help our loved one be the person we know deep down inside they are is part of nurturing our relationship with them. The benefits for us as supporters is as great as the benefit to our loved ones as well.
    Keep writing Dave and keep reminding everyone of the things we all know are true about bipolar. It is easy to allow all of the stresses of life beyond this problem to let us forget what we need to do, or for us to give up or get so tired of having to do and say the same things over and over again. Never give up and never let a disease control your lives or allow you to lose someone you care about.
    I wish you Dave and all of you who are supporting someone you love who has bipolar a very Happy New Year, and new beginnings and renewed strength to continue to be the best support we can.
    Your Friend in Michigan,

    Joe

  11. I can’t understand why, when people
    don’t like to hear what you have to
    say, don’t just stop getting your
    information. I am a bipolar supporter and you have helped me in many ways and if I don’t agree
    with what you say, I see NO REASON
    to write hate mail to you or knock
    you for your opinion. After all they asked for the information and if they don’t like it, go someplace
    else.

  12. I so agree with Pat437! I mean really. We all go off at times for no reason. If one would come off the crazy and make ammends, that would even be acceptable to some degree.

  13. dave,
    hi, i need help. my husband is getting bad again his thing is when things are not going his way he talks about suiside i have a nine month old and i am not sure how much more i can take please help

  14. Hi David,
    When I finally went to the therapist she set goals with me the first time I saw her. My daughter who was completely innocent had started getting high because she got hurt, the therapist told me to go home and tell her to stop. The other goal was to get my youngest in for therapy- she is also bipo. I was able to do both of these. At first it seemed hugh, it was easy. Other people seem to be setting my goals, my new goal my father and his wife decided I need to save my house, it seems hugh, I have contacted CCCS and I am going to try to save my house now the creditors will have to wait.
    Thanks David,
    Karen

  15. I am new to all of this my boyfriend was hospitilized for being bi polar and he refuses to take his meds and sez nothing is wrong with him, Since I have relocated to be with him he has moved out of the house 3 times blames me for everything that goes wrong and verbally abuses me to know end I have 1 son with him and I have 2 childern from a previous marriage. I know that he has a problem and I know that it is not him per say, but I have taken on so much to help the situation but it seems that no matter how much I try to help it makes things worse, I am the only one who works, pays bills takes care of the house and that is still not enough, he smokes weed and from reading these e mails that is a nono. I am so lost alone and confused all I want to do is help him get better and I do not know how, where to begin he sez nothing ias wrong with him and that it is all ME! It has gotten me to the point that I started to believe this until I started to read Daves information, I have offered to go to therpy with him and he insists nothing is wrong. I want to purchase this course but my money would not allow me too at this time due to me being the only one working etc.. He places blame on evryone but himself takes NO resposibility for what he does or does not do all the wrong is my fault, I am tiref of crying and I have no clue where the beginning is. Please someone any one help me help him I love him so much and I want him to get better, his family does not think that he has a problem they say to him LEAVE HER!denial is a better word! I feel alone and stressed out. I am trying to keep it together but I do not know how much longer I can hold on he calls me to tell me how bad of a person I am etc… I want to pack up and leave and go home but that will not resolve the problem, someone has to do something this downward spiral cannot be good this episode has lasted now for 4 weeks, and is not getting better.

  16. Well, Dave, you hit the nail on the head with THIS email! When I look back on the questions like you ask, I find myself LYING to myself about how I ATTEMPT to control my hypomania. No – I don’t get enough sleep – I pull all-nighters for all kinds of reasons, most of which I can’t sleep because the problems of the following day disturb me, and also, I’m afraid I won’t hear the alarm in time.

    On other nights, I take my night meds at Midnight, and since they give me a “rush” for about an hour, I stay up and read, and have a cup of yogurt and some chips&dip. I then go to sleep about 1, and set the alarm for 4AM!

    My therapist says I can do this (lack of sleep) if I make up for it on other nights – and I DO. I will follow an all-nighter (or a 4AM) with sleeping til 1 or 2 in the afternoon. She says as long as I have the “ebb and flow” of a sleep pattern, I WILL be all right. So far – so good – but I DO worry that my sleep deprivation will catch up to me.

    I smoked grass since my marriage in 2003 until about 4 months ago; I quit because I just didn’t feel like doing it any more. A few of my “friends” knew I did it, but I lied to my doctors (both physical and psychiatric)and didn’t tell them I was using. I didn’t even tell my therapist, for fear of being “talked down at.” Eventually, I got tired of the lying, and the fact that weed didn’t really DO anything FOR me, so I quit. NOW – I can be honest when I tell them I’m not using recreational drugs…

    I DO take my antipsychotic meds religiously; eat well; and socialize. I have GREAT plans for 2008, and have goals, but no time-table. At times, I feel my “plans” may be grandious and “pie in the sky,” and at other times, I think they’re “do-able.” Your help was invalable, and I thank you for spending some time with me over the phone. You had some ideas I hadn’t even thought of…I guess I just don’t have enough confidence in myself that I can do it.

    Bipolar survivors often have a lack of judgment when it comes to goal-setting, and a lack of confidence in their own abilities. I feel I’m “high-functioning” enough that I CAN follow through with my goals, though.

    BIG HUGS to all bipolar survivors and those who love them. My prayers are for your continued improvement. Stay sane, and have a blessed, healthy, prosperous and HAPPY NEW YEAR!

  17. The self-delusion (lying to one’s self) is a huge issue. There are a few people who legitimately are unaware they are lying. They want to believe they are doing more than they are. I am a supporter. My Granddaughter hit me, and when I called her on it, she denied it. I looked at her in the eye and said–so, you just lashed out at me and hit me…and suddenly she “realized” she had and appologized. This happens quite often.

  18. To GEENA: You have taken on a LOT with your bipolar boyfriend. Not only are you “sticking with him,” you have a CHILD with him. No – it is NOT easy dealing with the bipolar illness, and NO you are NOT losing YOUR mind.

    If you can, get him into therapy and get a GOOD psychiatrist. I don’t know HOW/WHAT to tell you about him NOT taking his medications, but that is at the root of his problem.

    If you feel like leaving, LEAVE. DON’T give him ultimatums, just GO. If not for your sake, then the sake of the children. If he gets violent with you and the kids, it is NOT a SAFE environment.

    I know you LOVE him more than life itself – I’ve been in such a relationship with a paranoid schizophrenic, and THAT was NOT easy, either. The only thing that stopped that relationship was my finding a “normal” man and marrying HIM. Otherwise, I would still be with Rene, but what a life that would have been!

    The IMPORTANT thing is to “take care of Number One.” I know that’s easy to say – but you have no one BUT yourself to take care of YOURSELF and your children. You’ve become a “caregiver” when you should be taking care of YOURSELF.

    I hope this has helped. I feel so sorry for you in this predicament. Turn to your faith and belief in God, and I will keep you in my prayers.

  19. Dave,
    I think most of us,bipolar or not,lie to ourselves. Maybe because we acually don’t realize we are or begin to believe our lies.I know in my case,I often need someone,as youself,to challenge my replies and my thinking to open my eyes as to what is the truth.I’ve just a couple days ago ordered your course for bipolar(and adhd)along with drug addiction.Meth in my case.I’ve self medicated for over 25 years and was just diagnosed with bipolar disorder and adhd 5 months ago……I have relapsed twice in 5 months and am just soo wanting to be able to function in life(without meth) and feel like at 50 years of age,that this may be my last chance. An looking forward to your course and hope to find informatin and tools that will help me as I have found in your daily email.Thank You for not letting the grumpies stop you from halping so many others!!

  20. Dave I am real interested in talking with you about your programs. I have a 21 year old away at school. I don’t know how to support him away from home. I have tried to set up supports for him, but have not been successful. I think your information is very helpful. I need some guidance in purchasing your

  21. I don’t know how you do what you do, but hey, keep it up. Sounds like you take a lot of flak for trying to help people with and people supporting those with bipolar. For all the heat you’re taking, here’s something else for you: As a Bipolar Survivor I appreciate your emails and your information. I use it, it works for me and the encouragement is indisposable. In short : Thank you!

  22. Dave,I have twin grandsons with all the symptoms of bipolar. They are 18 with no jobs, no insurance, and are on probation wit fines to pay and community service. They are unable to complete any of this. Please tell me who to contact for help. Thank you!

  23. Dave,

    Thank you for having the courage to speak out about lying to oneself. We ALL do it at some time. It’s very destructive and actually makes things worse. It’s not easy to speak the truth when people don’t want to hear it. But this world would be in a total mess (instead of the half mess it’s in 8-)) if people like you didn’t speak out. Don’t stop! We all need to hear the truth and since I’ve found your website, I’ve learned more ways to accomplish positive things in my live. Thank you, thank you. Don’t get discouraged! There are many more of us out here who appreciate your honesty than those who don’t.

    God bless!
    Natalie

  24. If you keep lying to yourself about the same thing over and over again, you end up believing it. That’s probably why we all do it now and then. Both my bipolar men, ex-husband and current boyfriend, have been constantly in denial about money. “I don’t need money. I’m very happy without it.” “I used to make a lot of money, but I’m much happier now.” They know they may never have again what they used to take for granted, like a mortgage or even a credit card, so it’s easier to say they don’t want it. I even wonder if it isn’t more positive to tell yourself a white lie that you don’t need money than the frustration I go through when I can’t afford to buy decent furniture because no bank or company will give me credit after my ex and I got into horrendous debt.

  25. To supporters esp annamomof2 and geenie {{{{}}}} to all of us I am walking on eggshells all day hes in such an episode if I ask is he hungry “what difference does it make” then he gets mad he can sit at the table and glare at the wall for hours hes raging inside somethings going to happen no matter how peaceful I am just pray its not at home my daughter doesnt see it hes gotten in arguments with police fights, at work, etc let that happen so I am not there and not responsible I am responsible for everything he will not try anything he says why bother it wont work I am worn out doing it all and trying to make a safe home for my daughter. If I had a ways I would go but he spent all the money, got mad and wrecked the car, my family doesnt want to hear of it (its a shameful thing to have mental illness they think I am making it up)pray me and my daughter can have a peaceful new years eve I got her some snacks and she got some videos for christmas and some toys we can play every holiday he ruins it she says it even so I know oh boy here comes another holiday. And hes off work for 2 days hes about ready to quit he lasts about a month or so then he gets in a fight or argument or has some sickness and cant work anymore pray he doesnt quit I need some time without him some peace.
    dtdubois

  26. to SusannaWA thanks for the advice! he does not live w/ me any longer he moved out to be with his Neice and her 3 children. He has not been by to see our son etc.. he calls and all he does is accuse me of things yells screams and BLAMES me. I basically told him that when he is ready to man up and be a family man and take resposibility for himself do not barther to call me to ARGUE! I am working holding down the house kids etc.. I feel like I am on a never ending rollercoster ride and I am petrified of them so u can only imagine! I love him enough to get him help I sent away for his b/c so he can get some type of insurance so then maybe we can make a step in the right direction. I do PRAY alot read Prayers out of the bible.. Thanks for the words of wisdom my email address is Geena82873@aol.com if ever u want to address me directly and on more of a personal level… Thanks and Keep your head up as well! God Bless And HAPPY NEW YEAR!

  27. You are correct in goal setting and
    the person who got mad was probably
    setting too high a goal for herself or the person they are supporting. I am a supporter and the goals the therapists set are very small and change as goals are achieved. They usely start with taking meds as prescribed, doing chores, etc. As a biopolar person
    achieves goals, they may be ready to take on more but they have to get used to the routine and reminded that they have a chemical
    imbalance and continue to take meds
    when the feel better.

    I, too, was watching an old movie, 1940’s with Bette Davis, “All This and Heaven Too. The wife in this movie obviously has bipolar and creates grief for all those around her…today it is recognized for what it is..bipolar but left untreated..the chaos she created could have been avoided with therapy and meds.

    Hava a safe day.

  28. David,
    I’m dealing with a husband who refuses medication. We went to a doctor last year and he did start taking lithium. But stopped 6 months later (behind my back) and lied to me.
    What do you do in this case? I feel my life will be chaos if I don’t leave him. But I don’t want to leave him. Am I crazy?

  29. To Geena,
    I read all of the posts after I put mine in and yours struck me. Your boyfriend sounds EXACTLY like mine does every time he starts an episode. He’s fine all year, then his episode hits, and he’s forgotten every promise he’s ever made (like not putting me through episodes!). He says he’s fine and it is ME. Please know you’re not alone. Every woman (or man for that matter) who loves someone with bi-polar feels EXACTLY as you do right now. You’re not alone, and you’re not crazy, you just love a man with bi-polar. It’s truly that simple. I wish you the best (and wish I had answers).

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