Our family doctor found us a psychiatrist who is familiar with bi-polar who does marriage counseling.

I opted not to go as my husband was in hypo mania and needed to be hospitalized. I felt manipulated into the therapy as if part of him coming to grips with his disorder entails his usual not being accountable and if I would just behave things would be fine.

He clearly has work to do on himself before we can consider it again but I don’t want it shoved down my throat as I’m coping with his problems and don’t need the grief that would cause as well. Especially if the person doesn’t know what they are doing and are trying to put us on level playing ground which is typical of marriage counselling. And with manic/depression you are not coming at things from the same angle.

I must say he is one manipulative person and clever looking for ways to leverage his case and get allies in his corner. He feels at a disadvantage as he is clearly one very ill man incapable of making good decisions. Our life is in turnoil right now due to how badly he managed things and we only just got his diagnosis (2 years). We’ve struggled with his problems for many years prior not diagnosed properly and not knowing why he was so difficult to get along with.

I really felt that therapy would nothing but worsen an already difficult situation for me and I am refusing it. But our marriage remains in a very bad place. In fact I want to leave. I have had enough of living this way and the changes he needs to make are not coming fast enough. I’ve been with him for 17 years total.

He is refusing to do the right things for himself and keeps acting like a child. I’m am getting to fed up with the whole thing.