Hi,
How’s it going?
What a day was yesterday. I had so much nonsense to deal with.
I have one person who USE TO work for me excusing me of discriminating against them because they have bipolar disorder.
I heard and read how I was a bad person, I “exploited people”, I created a “poisonous work environment.” on and on and on and on. The entire thing gave me a headache. After reading it, you would think I was a really, really bad person.
This person is suppose to report me to the labor department which is funny since I have more than 10 people that work for me with one or more disorders.
I can’t wait. Because I am going to document the entire thing from a to z and hopefully help another employer deal with a nightmare like this.
The sad part is, this kind of nonsense wastes my time and instead of working on productive things I am bogged down with stupid stuff.
Over the last few weeks, I have been lied to so many times it’s amazing, had my credit card used without my permission, multiple people in the organization have been lied to, I have heard every possible excuse why something wasn’t done, work hasn’t gotten done, time sheets submitted didn’t make sense sometimes.
I have MASSIVE documentation of what happened and all that was done wrong. I also have multiple lawyers, HR people and 4 people on the team who will just be working on this in case something comes up with the labor department. Unfortunately I had one person slip through the hiring process that should not have been hired. In like 30 days it was a total disaster had occurred. Far worse than my mom’s episodes because my mom never was working for me when she went into a bipolar episode.
The sad part is that everyone that has one or more disorders said this person was not stable and should be let go. I gave second, third, fourth, fifth up to I am not kidding, maybe 20+ chances.
Even after my credit card was used without my permission which is illegal you know, I suspended the person hoping that we could help the person. However I really got conned and scammed.
The entire thing has cost me a ton.
I am so annoyed about the entire thing, I am contacting the labor department and going to interview them.
I am sure there are people on my list, trying to figure out how to deal with an employee with bipolar disorder or some disorder like it that is a nightmare.
So as I was going through this, did I just freak out? Nope.
I heard an expression one time:
“Can you keep your head when everyone around you is losing theirs?”
At first I thought this was funny, but then I thought about it.
So what does this have to do with bipolar disorder?
Think about it, like I did.
What if your loved one is in an episode. How do you keep your normal, calm self and your positive attitude while they are going totally manic?
See what I mean?
It sure isn’t easy, is it?
But it can be done.
Two things:
1. You have to separate you loved one from their disorder.
2. You have to separate yourself from your loved one.
One way to separate your loved one from their disorder is to think about how they are when they’re not in an episode.
Another way to separate your loved one from their disorder is to remember why you care about them, or why you fell in love with them in the first place.
One way to separate yourself from your loved one when they’re in an episode is to continue going about your life as you normally would.
Another way is to take a break. Do something for yourself that you enjoy – maybe go to the movies with a friend. Try not to think about your loved one’s episode.
These are just a few of the suggestions I offer in my courses/systems below:
SUPPORTING AN ADULT WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarsupporter.com/report11
SUPPORTING A CHILD/TEEN WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarparenting.com
HAVE BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.survivebipolar.net
Still, it’s hard to keep a normal, calm self and a positive attitude when your loved one is in a manic episode, no matter how many suggestions I offer. You’re the one going through it, after all.
So how do you stay normal and calm?
If you’re a spiritual person, you pray. If you have a good friend, you talk to them about what is going on, or cry on their shoulder.
If you write in a journal, you write out all your thoughts and feelings honestly, knowing no one else will read them.
Some people scream into a pillow.
And how do you keep a positive attitude?
Well, that’s up to you. How do you normally keep a positive attitude in spite of the fact that your loved one has bipolar disorder, even when they’re not in an episode?
You deal with it one day at a time, that’s what most people tell me, and you make the best of it.
You take care of yourself, and your family.
You try to be grateful for the small things.
And be especially grateful when your loved one isn’t in an episode and things are fairly normal in your life.
So how do you keep your head when everyone around you is losing theirs?
What do you think? I’d like to know how YOU do it?
The thing is, when you have someone who works for you, you don’t have time to sit around and wait for them to get better. I made a HUGE mistake and never will make this one again.
I think back to all the jobs my mom lost and all the problems she must have created for employers. They probably really, really, really, disliked her.
Based on what has happen to me, I am sure my mom cost some employers in the past tons of money and made their life miserable.
The difference between my mom and this person is that my mom didn’t really know what she had. This person however absolutely does and manipulates people and the system.
Several consultants that help me say I am out of my mind and should never hire people from my list.
The entire thing is a annoying. The good news is that I have great new replacements and from now on, we will have multiple layers of oversight. Over the last few days we created all new systems to prevent this from happening again.
I am also going to be in close contact with several government agencies including the labor department when these issues come up.
My mom said to me that she had no idea that someone with bipolar disorder would do such stuff. I said to her “mom you use to be just like that why do you think you lost 20 jobs.” She said sorry but again my mom really didn’t know any better. The worst is when a person knows what they have and still does this stuff.
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David Oliver is the author of the shocking guide “Bipolar Disorder—The REAL Silent Killer.” Click Here to get FREE Information sent via email on how and why bipolar disorder kills.