Hello, I hope things are going well for you today.
I wanted to discuss something that is a difficult aspect of living with bipolar disorder. Many people that are bipolar have difficulty telling those around them of their condition. They are afraid they will be judged, or that others will not quite understand what being bipolar means.
Telling others about your disorder is purely a personal choice. I have seen that many people are able to relax and be themselves once they let others know they are bipolar, and no longer feel like they are ‘hiding’ something from their friends.
Once those you are surrounded by know that you have bipolar disorder, they can often understand you much better and do not wonder why you are acting a certain way. It is common for those who are bipolar to feel that others do not notice their illness, when in fact their behaviors suggest other wise. Once they let others know they are bipolar, they are often told that others “just knew something was not right” and that they now understand their actions a bit better than before.
Of course there is always a right time and place to tell others about your bipolar disorder. A first date or job interview are probably two times where it would be best to not discuss your disorder. The most important thing about telling others about your disorder is waiting until you feel comfortable with another person to tell them.
A friend of mine was having a particularly bad manic episode and people at her job knew something was amiss. She was consistently late for work, and seemed to be very scattered and disorganized when at work. She finally confided in a close coworker that she was bipolar. Once she told her close coworker, she allowed her coworker to let others know of her condition (since she did not feel 100% comfortable speaking to everyone).
Once her coworkers knew of her condition they were much more understanding of things and she was able to relax more at work. Of course there was one coworker in particular who was rude to her and judged her, but she realized what was important was that 99% of her coworkers supporter her and were there for her.
Again, it really is a personal choice, but often confiding in others about your disorder can educate others and make thing a lot easier on yourself.
Hope you have a great day.
Your Friend,
Dave
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I told people at work that were young and immature (early 20’s). I had a negative experience. I felt judged and discriminated against. My medication was way off and it made my biplar (hypomania …agitation, confusion, plus the side effects of the meds of memory loss and confusion terrible). I feel like I lost my job because of this. It was a job working at Starbucks so it wasn’t a huge loss, but it was humiliating and in my first year of diagnosis so very difficult. Make sure that when/if you do tell. The person is only supporting you and for you. Otherwise they can be confused and turn against you. This can be difficult for someone newly diagnosed to differentiate. It almost adds more to the equation. However, at the time the side affects of my medication were so bad I felt like it would “buy” me time because I was learning slower. The caffeine; lack of constant schedule for me was killer. Bad all around. Just make sure you really think it through and trust the people you tell before hand. Good Luck! 🙂
Hi Dave,
Good article …… however how does one tell someone about their bipolar? I have a very dear friend that has stood by me through thick and thin over the years and no matter how I try to tell her how I feel she comes up with some other excuse as to how I should pull up my boot strings and move on. Her latest is your brain controls your body so get on with it. I try to tell her that it is a chemical imbalance in the brain and I have NO control over it or it is just like that leg cramp you get…. you never know when it is going to strike and you can’t tell your brain to stop it. It has to take it’s course just like my episodes. It would be very helpful if you had a segment on this. Thanks.
I love this post. This has always been a hairy topic for me. I’m bipolar and I’m not ashamed of it. Still, I’d rather my employers not know for fear of discrimination. The illness is a huge part of my life, my beliefs, goals, hopes for the future, etc. Its a big part of who I am. Thus, almost all my friends and family know. To completely understand where I come from you have to know about my disorder disorder. I do avoid the topic with a portion of my family because they have preconceived notions and have judged/condemned me. I believe each circumstance must be treated individually. There have even been times when I’ve been used as a resource! So basically, I guess one has to tell or not tell those as he seems fit.
Thank you!