Hi,
I have to share a really sad story. There
was a person that got my bipolar supporter
course for supporting adults. The one
at:
http://www.bipolarsupporter.com/report11
He said that he was really excited about
it. Unfortunately his wife, who has bipolar
disorder found out about it and pressured
him to ask for a refund.
Don’t get me wrong, I am not upset about
the refund. That makes no difference to me. I
feel bad this person is going to suffer because
anytime he tries to take action, his wife prevents
it.
My mom use to do the same exact thing for DECADES.
I can remember so many times, that we didn’t do so many
normal family things because my mom was in an episode
and didn’t want to.
For example, I rarely ever saw my dad’s side of the family because
my mom would get all mad so my dad stopped taking us there.
He felt it was easier to just “appease” her than it
was to do what was right.
Let me tell you one thing. Do NOT let bipolar
disorder episodes rule your family. I was talking to
my dad over the last few days and he finally
realized the mistake he made for almost 40
years–he let my mom’s bipolar disorder
control the family.
It proved to be a multi decade disaster.
I really felt bad for the guy asking for
the refund. He was pressured to not
learn about the disorder and help
himself, his wife and his family.
Clearly bipolar disorder is running
his family.
In my courses at:
SUPPORTING AN ADULT
Visit:
http://www.bipolarsupporter.com/report11
SUPPORTING A CHILD/TEEN
Visit:
http://www.bipolarparenting.com
HAVE BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.survivebipolar.net
Virtually all the people interviewed
both those with bipolar disorder and
supporters say this was a big mistake.
They said NOT to allow Bipolar Episodes
to control life.
I totally agree. I believe it’s a grave mistake to allow
bipolar episodes to run the show so to speak.
For my dad, mom and my family, it cost
jobs, relationships with many
family members, lots of money, etc.
Well I have to run. Before I go,
I almost have the websites setup for the
job descriptions that I will be offering and
how you or someone you know can apply for them.
Have a great day.
Your Friend,
Dave
My significant other has a manic depressive disorder and maybe bipolar, because she just keeps ruining her relationships and it affects everyone around her. I realized what I was getting into before I started, but I was very much in love and when you care for someone the sky is the limit. After a stupid argument I blew up at her and said some mean hurtful things, but now she has changed her phone numbers and kicked me out of the house and has severed all ties because she feels threatened because I dared to confront her about everything. It’s a very sad sad situation, but it is s averyt good reason why we should all educate ourselves about manic depression and bipolar disorder.
Hey David,
I really have appreciated your insights and your emails. My husband and I recently (last November 2006) sat our 20 year old daughter down at a lunch we invited her to, asked her if she was open to look at a couple of books on Bi-polar Disorder. We told her if she was, we would pay for her to see the doctors and get meds if that was what was needed. (she moved out during an episode last March… long story) Anyway, she took one of the books written by Lana Castle and later one by a Doctor that treats patients with Bi-polar (exclusively.) She related to what she was reading and off we went to the Family Practioner.
Once our family doctor learned that my sister (her aunt) has Bi-polar and the doctor had seen the extreem change in our daughter in the last three years…she said she was sure that Bi-polar was the culprit…however, we went on to a phychiatrist and a therapist as well. Our daughter, has been a little slow moving, but working in the right direction. We went for months at a time without seeing or hearing from her. The havoc she put her parents and siblings through is more than I care to write about. Other family members are still not on speaking terms with us because they believed and still belive her LIES! (who needs family like that anyway?) Bottom line, my daughter told me yesterday that she is $10000.00 in credit card debt! She had NO debt before she moved out a year ago. I know she is almost 21 now, but still so immature. I am never quite sure how to respond to what she says or how she acts sometimes. She seems so out of touch with what is real. She is very pretty and well spoken so people can often be sucked into her drama and “stories” So after this really long explaination… How can I support her without being in relationship with her destructive choices? My other kids love her, but don’t want her moving back in. Our house is so much happier and peaceful (so sad to say) when she isn’t here for long periods of time. (like when she has lived with us. She has been in and out a couple of times) What course would be the best one for me to get? Adult or teen? She is so immature about some stuff (I know she would argue with me about this -but trust me) and then again, she is dealing with adult issues like debt and jobs, etc. Thanks again for doing what you do. My husband will actually read your emails when I forward them to him and the other stuff he just doesn’t want to read or “deal” with. He is a avid exerciser so the body building -not a FREE day, email really spoke to him.
My wife and I have been married for 20 years and my in-laws and I have believed my wife has bipolar diorder but she refuses to get help. Just recently she has taken creditcards/ checking accounts out in our oldest daughters name and ruined her credit and forced her to have to drop out of college for the moment. My wife has filed for divorce and has destroyed our family and much more and caused her parents and myyself to file bankruptcy and on and on. I have tried everything from doctors to police and local DA’s office to but a stop to her financial dealings to no avail. I need help but have been drained of everything to be able to help. ANYONE WITH ANY SUGGESTIONS PLEASE CONTACT ME ASAP THANK YOU ND GOD BLESS!!!!!
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Sorry, it took before I could correct it…anyway,
I have bipolar disorder II, am a rapid cycler and have mixed episodes…though I would love to purchase your course am unable to do so at this time. However, I am an avid reader, and do research every bit of information regarding bipolar avaiable thru books, internet, etc. Because I am not working, but am going to college full-time I am able to spend more time researching than I have been at other times in my life.
As sad as it is that the husband listened to his wife and sent the course back for a refund, the actual tragedy to me is that he doesn’t take responsibility for his own actions…he’s the one who doesn’t have the disorder yet he is listening to the one with the disorder…What kind of sense does that make? I understand the “want to just keep peace” and “not rock the boat” thing, as someone with bipolar I often try to keep the peace as much as I can because I know that too often my symptoms and epidsodes disturb the peace enough already, but I am not to blame for a chemical imbalance. I am a victim of an illness. I no longer make excuses for having an illness, anymore than my mom should make an excuse for having diabetes, or apologize for it. I applaud you for doing so much to help your mother. You were true to yourself and that is an important thing.
My friend has a saying, “It is what it is” and that is the truth of my mental illness. I am not the illness, and the illness is not me, it simply is…
My family members do not really wish to read about, research, or do anything that calls for that…they accept that I have bipolar, that I am “moody”, creative, hardworking, but cannot seem to hold a job because most employers do not understand and are discrimnatory…I have held jobs for long periods of time, but the end of last year I had an episode and had to quit my job, not the first time for an episode but this time I did what was best for me, and now I am viewed as “lazy” and “irresponsible.” Yet my brother told me yesterday that he could see how much better I am now that I am no longer working at at job that stressed me out so badly–sort of a snowball affect–the job stressed me out badly, the boss wasn’t understanding, as soon as I was honest about having “manic-depression” I was treated differently, caused more stress, which triggered an episode…
If more family members, significant others, and friends took an active role in supporting their loved one’s who have bipolar, or other mental illnesses, the more understanding there would be, thus creating a more positive atmosphere, with less stress, the less episodes and triggers there would be…
Thanks taking the time to create the emails, blogs, courses, etc that are so helpful to so many people
lissab1_b
Hi Dave, My daughter has bipolar, or something. She is very smart, and does very well with school, which she does not finish. At her job, she doesn’t know or realize that she cannot talk on her cell phone anytime she wants to. She looses her job. One thing that I have learned is that we have to keep talking to her and reminding her of what she needs to be doing. She does well while keeping busy. I have learned not to yell at her, or to criticize her every move. But I have learned to watch her carefully, and to verbally support her in everything she does correct.
Hope this helps in some way…
Denise
HI DAVE I AM REALLY STRUGGLING AND SEEM AT THE BRINK OF LOSING MY FAMILY DUE TO THIS DELIPIDATING DISEASE.I AM CURRENTLY ON A BREAKDOWN LOW ,WITH SEVERE MOOD AND AND DEPREESIVENESS. ALL THE ABOVE SEEM TO MUCH FOR MY WIFE AND I THINK SHE WANTS GIVE UP THE SUPPORT OF ALL THE YEARS,WHO BLAMES HER,LIVING WITH A CHRONIC BIPOLAR IS LIKE A DEATH SENTENCE.I,VE BEEN IN SUCH A SEVERE EPISODE THAT I;VE REVERTED TO SELF-MUTILATION.I ALSO FEEL TO MAKE THINGS MORE TOLERABLE FOR EVERYONE AT HOME I SHOULD ELIMINATE THE COMMON DENOMINATOR, NAMELLY MYSELF. PLEASE HELP, HELP MY SPOUSE TO COME TO TERMS WITH MY CONDITION.DESPERATE.
I would dearly love your couse but I cant afford it..PLEASE DONT STOP writing about bipolar.
YOU have opened my eyes to mty condition and have made me take stock of the situation.
I left half the yard unmowed today the first time in my life. I sat in the oderc and had a coffee and though stuff it it will be there tomorrow. IT was the first time I didnt presson into the dark hours to finish it.
READING YOUR MATERIAL has changed my way of thinking.I am just coming off a high and I am exhausted
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you are doing a great job.thank you for helping so many people.
I am a widowed Grandmother with total custody of my 11 year old granddaugher. She was diagnosed as Bipolar about a year ago. I would like some help on how to not let them ruin your life and family. I can’t take here anywhere that she doesn’t immediately get rude and wants everythting she sees. If she doesn’t get what she wants she immediately throws a fit and I end up taking her home. See also has ODD.