Hi,
How’s it going?
I had a really bad day yesterday. I was sick ALL day. I have a major problem with my sinuses.
I think I have a sinus infection. I am going to wait one more day and then I have to head to the doctor.
I had no energy and wound up sleeping 50% of the day yesterday.
Before I get started, take a look at the comments from yesterday’s daily email.
Some really interesting ones. You can see them here:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/bipolarsupporterblog/?p=21#comment-38
OKay with that said, I got this email that I want o share with you and ask you what you think:
“Dear Dave:
I am married to a man who has bipolar disorder. He didn’t used to be bad about it, but lately he’s gotten so bad, it’s like it’s just one long episode with no breaks in between. Is it possible for one episode to just go on and on like that? Or is it just a series of episodes with like no break in between or maybe just a day or two in between? I’ve read your emails and I know you talk about recovery, but I wonder in my husband’s case if there really is any hope of recovery. Can you help us?”
——————————————–
This is a tough one, I have to be honest with you. I wish I could just turn it over to you and ask you what you would say to her (in fact, I think I will, at the end of this email).
It’s really hard for me sometimes when I get emails like this, because there are no easy answers. I can’t just say yes or no or maybe. The answers have to be more in-depth, and they’re not thesame for everyone.
I mean, I’m sure this woman is leaving out a lot of information that I might need if I’m going to give her a really good answer. But I can at least try my best, because I think she deserves an answer.
As far as episodes that seem continuous…
Without treatment, an episode that may have only lasted a short time can stretch out into months. I know, because Michele who works for me, her mom has bipolar disorder, and her dad had promised her mom that he would never put her in the hospital. So what would have been a one- month episode for her turned into a six- month episode.
Some people with bipolar disorder have episodes that extend for very long periods of time because they won’t take medication.
Taking the right medication (which she didn’t indicate if her husband is even taking medication) is crucial to whether an episode is shorter rather than longer. So, see why I can’t even talk to this woman about that? She doesn’t give me that information, and without it, I can’t advise her.
But sometimes a series of episodes can seem like they stretch on and on with no break, while there really is a 1-2 or even a few days of a break in between.
There is a type of bipolar disorder that is called rapid-cycling, where the moods can shift so rapidly that sometimes it can be days or even hours apart. Now, granted, this is a rare form of bipolar disorder, but it does happen. So I would advise this woman to get her husband to a doctor/psychiatrist and find out if maybe her husband has this kind of bipolar disorder.
At any rate, he should find out if it is a medication issue, as there would probably be a different medication for this type of bipolar disorder.
In my courses/systems, I teach about all the different types of bipolar disorder including rapid-cycling bipolar disorder and the signs and symptoms of each kind:
SUPPORTING AN ADULT WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarsupporter.com/report11
SUPPORTING A CHILD/TEEN WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarparenting.com
HAVE BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.survivebipolar.net
As far as whether this woman’s husband has any chance of recovery, I like to believe that everyone has a chance of recovery. That’s probably because I like to think positively. Maybe there are cases with no chance of recovery, but I don’t like to think that. If I did, I certainly wouldn’t write the courses I do, that talk about recovery in them.
But I think that with the right treatment and a good doctor, psychiatrist, and therapist…. And with a good supporter and a good support system… and with time and effort, anyone can recover. I know that sounds very simplistic, so let me go further.
First, let me define recovery.
I believe that recovery means long-term stability. It’s like when a cancer victim goes into remission. Because there’s no cure for cancer, the best they can hope for is remission from the cancer – then they live as normal a life as they can. But they’re never really cured.
Well, it’s the same for bipolar disorder. There is no cure for it. But as you learn to manage it, as long as you are in treatment for it, and the more you have long-term stability for it, you have recovery/remission from the disorder, like the cancer victim, you can live a relatively normal life, too.
Recovery doesn’t mean you’re cured. The disorder is still there. It’s just not “active.” You’re not going through episodes. It doesn’t mean that you will never have another episode (that’s actually an important point to make), but people with bipolar disorder can go a long time without having an episode, if they’ve made the appropriate changes in their lives and they are managing their disorder well.
I know a woman who went 12 years without an episode, and a man who went 20 years without one. So I know it’s possible. And I would call that as close to recovery as you can get.
The very least I would tell this woman is that I believe recovery is possible. But as for whether her husband could recover, I just couldn’t say. I don’t know him, and I don’t know their whole situation (like I said earlier, I don’t even know if he’s on medication, or if he’s taking medication), so I don’t think I’m qualified to give an answer.
Also, I’m not a doctor, psychiatrist, therapist, or any medical/mental health professional. All I can do is give my opinion.
Speaking of opinions, what is yours?
What would YOU tell this woman?
David Oliver is the author of the shocking guide “Bipolar Disorder—The REAL Silent Killer.” Click Here to get FREE Information sent via email on how and why bipolar disorder kills.
Post responses below
Speaking as some one who has lived all her life (35 years)with rapid cycling bi-polar disorder and is raising a teen ager with the very exact same thing david is right THERE IS NO CURE. There is still so little known about the condition. The very first thing she needs to do, wich with my personal experience most people who don’t have bi-polar don’t do, Is learen everything you possibly can about the condition, understand what the person is going through. That is the biggest problem my son and I face the people close to us have no understanding of what we are dealing with. That is the first and most important thing show the person you care for, that you love them enough to understand the condition they are facing what they are dealing with. It’s hard enough especially for rapid cyclers with the rollercoaster of emotions, dealing with this but loved ones who don’t understand makes it so so much harder because you feel you have no where to turn when things are at their worst.
secondly a lot of people who don’t suffer from the condition don’t seem to think about is wether the person with biplar is willing to give up certain parts of them selves to be able to take medication. Talk with the one you love listen and hear what they want. My emotionnality that comes from my disorder makes me a very creative person especialy in writing. You stick me on medication I loose some othe the emotions and my writting skills suffer for it. I don’t like medication because of that. But my family says I am so much easier to deal with (except for my son cause he understands) They want what is best and easiest for them not what is best for me. My son hates being in a mania state he would rather spend his days depressed. He too hates the emotional numbnes most medications bring. But no one in our family has taken the time to listen or understand what we are facing. What we want and are wlling to give up to be classified as normal by society. It is very very important to educate oneself about the disorder and I am not meaning only out of profecional books. Talk to some one who suffers from it really truely listen to what they have to say. You might be supprised at what you hear.
As for medication REASERCH REASERCH REASERCH! DON’T JUST TAKE YOUR DOCTORS OR PSYCHIATRISTS WORD FOR IT! Each individual reacts differrenty to the same medication. My son and i had two completely diffrent reactions to the same med. I became vilently angry and my son became suicidal. Reaserch for yourself any medication that you or your loved one will be taking know the positive asspects and the negative ones. A lot of the medications can in the long run cuse some very serious medical conditions especialy if the are not mointered right, liver disease bieng one long term problems from some meds. Quite a few are anti-sicotics we are not sicotic why take a med that is for another disorder that we don’t have. They can also have some very advers affects. So before you expect your loved one to just start poping these pills just because your doctor said so show them just how much you love the by finding out for yourself what exactly they are taking and what it can do to them in the short run and the long run.
So to conclude first realize it is not something that is cureable yet. FOR THEIR SAKE EDUCATE YOURSELF. Give them some one that undersatnds and can be their for them when they are at their worst. LISTEN TO THEM HEAR WHAT THEY WANT FOR THEMSELVES! AND REASERCH REASERCH REASERCH! Always reaserch for yourself any medication and treatments that are given to your loved one. DON’T JUST TAKE SOMEONE ELSES WORD THAT IT IS WHAT IS BEST FOR THEM. ONLY YOU AND YOUR LOVED ONE CAN DECIDE WHAT IS TRUELY BEST FOR THEM.
FIND STRENGTH FOR YOURSELF SO THAT YOU CAN BE THERE FOR YOUR LOVED ONE BECAUSE IF YOU ARE HAVING A HARD TIME DEALING WITH THIS THINK HOW MUCH HARDER IT MUST BE FOR THEM BECAUSE NOT ONLY DO WE HAVE TO LIVE WITH BI POLAR DISORDER, WE HAVE TO LIVE WITH THE REALITY OF THE HURT WE CAUSE OTHERS. AND UNDERSTANDING ALONG WITH STRENGTH FROM THOES WHO LOVE US WILL MAKE THINGS SO MUCH EASIER. TAKE IT FROM SOME ONE WHO KNOWS.
Tammy life long sufferer and mother
HI. ONE OF THE IMPORTANT THINGS MR. OLIVER SAID IS ABOUT MEDICATION. IF HE IS NOT TAKING MEDS REGULARILY THEN HE WILL DEFINATELY HAVE EPISODES. I AM NOT A DOCTOR OR THERAPIST EITHER, BUT I DO HAVE BI-POLAR AND I AM A DUAL DIAGNOSES PERSON AND A PEER SUPPORT COUNSELOR ON BOTH AREAS. I TAKE MY MEDS EVERDAY AND I STILL HAVE EPISODES. YOU HAVE TO KNOW YOUR SIGNS AND SYMPTOMS AND KNOW WHAT TO LOOK FOR WHEN YOU FEEL YOURSELF COMING UNSTABLE. THEN YOU HAVE TO ACT ON IT. NOT JUST SIT BACK AND WATCH IT HAPPEN. EVERY SUMMER I GET MANIC AND MY DOCTOR TRIES TO GIVE ME AN INCREASE IN MEDS FOR A COUPLE OF MONTHS UNTIL THE MANIA PASSES. AND ABOUT ONCE A YEAR TO TWO YEARS MY DEPRESSION MEDS NEED TO BE CHANGED. SO YOU SEE, THERE IS MAINTENANCE THAT HAS TO BE DONE WITH MENTAL ILLNESS IN ORDER TO STAY STABLE AND LESSON THE FREQUENCY OF ATTACKS. I HOPE THIS HELPS IN SOME WAY
FREESPIRIT
As to what to tell this woman, I would do exactly what you said. Ask her the correct questions about meds, doctors etc. How can you give her a correct answer if you don’t have all the facts?
I would tell this woman that yes, indeed, I have seen this type of Bi-polar but the worst case I have seen was my ex husband and he would not admit he had a problem let alone get any Psych help. My daughter also experiences this type and she knows she has it and will do practically anything to avoid another episode such as the woman described. Her husband may be on medications, as we have no way of knowing, but it is so very hard to find the right medications to treat any type of Bi-polar Disorder. Sometimes it can take years to find the combination and dosages that work because everyone is so different. But, yes, I believe that with the proper treatment and right meds anybody can eliminate most of their bi-polar episodes. My daughter has been in treatment for about 10 years now and, while she is very much improved, it doesn’t take very much stress to start her into another episode. So, she has a prescription for Clonazepam (a mild tranquilizer) to give to her when I notice the 1st signs of an episode and she have been fairly stable for a couple of months now and to me that is great progress. But she is on what I call the teeter-totter, as little stress can make her manic and the meds she is taking now are still being adjusted. But I agree with the proper Psychiatrist and the right amount of meds and dosages, I believe their is a reprieve from any type of Bi-polar Disorder.
Thank you ! I don’t believe there is a cure for bipolar . I do agree that it is manageable with a strong support system and medication. I have been diagnosed with the disorder . I tend to go for months without a lot of sleep and very little interaction with friends and family. When I crash it effects me differently than most people. I don’t sleep a lot but slip into a lethargic state of being with endless doing with no focus. I decided to ask myself what I could do when I had an episode how to take care of myself . I charted everything that is important to me and prioritized using my own check list . The headings include self-care, meals, housework , social activities, exercise and medication. As much as possible I journal which log special moments which I experienced throughout the day, events and news, and goals. These tools help me survive the highs and lows. Hope this was helpful!
Health , Hope and Opportunity!
JulieB
Sometimes it seems that an episode goes on and on but episodes change
quickly. I know i will go from hypomania to depression very quickly and there never seems to be a middle ground. I am very compliant with meds
but they haven’t invented one yet to maintain stability. This is just my case, all are different. Hypomania is great until it gets out of conrol and then the inevitable crash into depression. Fortunately I have a supportive
husband but there are times when even his patience is tried. I can’t imagine being in his shoes having to live with this all of the time. I live with
it because I have no choice. He has one and chooses to stay with me.
He prefer’s the hypomanic side of me, but does not like the loss of control
when it comes to money. He absolutely does not know what to do when it
comes to the depression side. He just let’s me sleep. He alerts me to the
signs of of both, but that just lets me know that he is aware. I am also aware. The solution still evades us. The right combination of medication is
still to be found, and believe , I have tried many many combinations,.
All I have is tools. And I use them to the best of my ability. I make sure I
exercise daily, eat heathy, and do not carry credit cards if I can avoid it.
Unfortunately during my last episode of mania I did max out 3. And I can’t really remember what the money was spent on. Nothing tangable. Certainly nothing I needed. Found a medication to put an end to the manic episode but it left me totally exhausted and listless. No energy whatsoever. Quit taking it after 15 days, and remain in the same conditon.
Waiting to hear from my meds doc.
Thats all for now.
I have lived with bipolar disorder and wasn’t diagnosed until 2 years ago. I was on medicine then the DR. decided to try something different because he didn’t think I was responding to that medicine like I should so he swithed it and I was on it for 5 months. I was in my manic state that whole 5 months the Dr. switched me back to the origanal medicine and I have been a lot better on it the Dr. says i’m responding better to it this time. I read alot about this disorder on the internet. My boyfriend says this is my imagination but I have a really good friend that is my support he is reading things I print off for him so he can understand what I’m going through and how to help me cope with it. I have also changed things in my life which has helped.
I agree with Dave that Medication is an absolute must when dealing with bipolar and that only knocks the episodes down a bit. Then there is the need for therapy with a psychologist trained in treating bipolar. It is not a one-size-fits-all disorder. Bipolar is as unique as each individual is because it is an imbalance of brain chemistry and every one’s brain chemistry is different. What medications work for me may not work for another, and visa-versa. So like Tammy said, “Research, research, research is the only way to find out what will bring any one’s episodes to a minimum.
I liked what Tammy had to say a lot. We do give up some ground by taking medication, not too many people bring that up, but I do loose a lot of “fun” and creativity by being medicated. My problem is I get suicidal so I realize I have to be on medication for life, even though it means being a little sluggish. But we do need to find out more information from this woman. Can you email her back Dave and ask her if he is even being treated? My life was one big episode it seemed, before medication. So I would agree that rapid cyclers can almost live in a chaotic state, but that yes, it is very much treatable if the person is medication compliant and sees a psychologist to learn to moderate and cope with intense emotions.
Sincerely,
Bob
I have Bipolar 2, which means I only get hypomania and not mania. My depression episodes are, however devastating and leave me feeling dead. There is NO CURE for this horrible disorder. You just have to develop coping skills.
I’m not sure if i have bipolar disorder or not..
I signed up for this corse because my boyfriend insists that I research it more because he thinks my behavior isn’t very normal..
Me and my bf have been dating for a year but I think that we have broken up 8 times..
When I was 12 I was diagnosed with depression and ADD..
and now being 18 things are much harder.
There are weeks where I go with hardly any sleep, feel great, and nothing seems to bother me at all..
and then there is times when i know I’m depressed.. these times usually just get so bad..
Ive been put into the hospital 4 times for attempting sucide, but I can’t count the number of times I actually tried..
Soemtimes I’m feeling great, and someone dieing won’t even make me upset.
but other times my boyfriend will ask me a question and I will just loose it on him..
When I get really sad, I end up losing a lot of things..
My boyfriend first usually, then my friends and relationships with my family..
I’m begining to lose just about everything again and I just don’t know whats wrong with me..
I don’t know whether this is bipolar disorder or just depression and ADD kicking in at different times.
I tried getting a referral to a dr. to talk to about this, but my family doctor still hasn’t gotten back to me after a month..
My feelings are hard to explain, and I don’t know who to ask for help..
i have bipolar and cant seem to find the right meds
Hi
I feel for all who suffer from this desease and their loved ones.Over the years i’ve lost my son and my husband to this desease.And I believe there is no cure yet not even a good true way of diagnosing it yet ;But they are advanceing in their studies.To hopefully soon {cause I also have 2 daughters one for sure has this disorder}a blood test to diagnose it properly, and studies to hopefully prevent this disorder before we are born.I’ve seen this desease with and without Medication and yes it totally depend on the person and what they’ve been thru in their lives.Keeping journals and haveing organization in your life with unconditional love is the best treatment so far.My husband was in and out of the hospital and on many different medication and yes he had to take medication to keep his mind from racing and another to wake up;Sorry got to go
yes i have a question my fiance and i just got my son back i haven,t had him for 10years. he takes medicine for schizophenira 4 medicines 2times aday. my fiance has a very difficult time with me i take lithiu and seroquil how do i help mysele help him to deal with this he says he cant deal with me the peoplehe discusses this with gives him negative advice. my fiance has and is supposed to take zoloft but doesnt take his medicine he is very i am a christian woman i am an assitant manager of a restaurant. how do i help my fiance understand this disorder insteadof just giving we are getting married august 2008 i just got my sonback i havent had in ten years he is also bypolar i need some for my fiance pleas thank you