Hi,

You know, some things are to be expected in life. Like in winter, you can expect that people are going to get the flu. You can expect that if you work at a job, that you will get a paycheck. (and, at some point, you can even expect that you will get a raise.) You can expect that if you pay your rent or mortgage, you will have a house to live in. (You can also expect that at some point, you will have to make repairs to that house, however.) Same with your car – You can expect that if you keep up the payments, you will have a car to drive. (You can also expect that at some point, you will have to make repairs to that car, however.)

Well, it’s the same with bipolar disorder. You can expect certain things when your loved one has the disorder. On the one hand, if they are doing what they should be doing to attain stability, then you can expect that they will get stable. On the other hand, if they are not doing the right things, you can expect that they will not get stable. But let’s just concentrate on the positive side of things. If your loved one is taking their medication like they’re supposed to, you can expect that the medication will work and help them become stable. If they are going to all their appointments – doctor, psychiatrist, and therapist – then you can expect there to be progress there. If they are eating right, you can expect them to be healthy. If they are exercising, you can expect that they will stay in shape physically. If they are sticking to a good sleep schedule, then you can expect that they will have good days, without the mania from lack of sleep.

Unfortunately, sometimes you don’t always get what you expect. Bipolar disorder is just sneaky like that. Your loved one could be doing everything right and still go into an episode. So you can expect that with bipolar disorder, there will be setbacks. If your loved one is keeping a journal and/or a daily mood chart, however, you can most likely see the pattern as it approaches so you can avoid a full blown episode. However, if your loved one does go into an episode, you should know what to expect then, as well, because you’ve experienced it in the past. You can expect that they are going to exhibit certain behaviors, like they have before. Which actually gives you an advantage, because what they’ve done before, they will do again, and you can be prepared.

If you do what you need to do as far as being a supporter to your loved one, then you can expect that they will feel that support. If you keep the lines of communication open between the two of you, for example, you can expect that your loved one will, indeed, come to you and tell you when they are not “feeling right.” And if you take care of yourself…As in making sure you are balanced physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually…You can expect that you won’t suffer from the supporter burnout that too many supporters fall prey to. And if enough time has passed, and your loved one has continued to take their medication, see their therapist, and do the other things they need to do to attain stability…You can expect that they will, indeed, someday be stable.

Well, I have to go!

Your Friend,

Dave