Hi,

Let me ask you a question: Have you ever had someone tell you not to complain because it could just be nothing but a waste of time for you? I bet you have. Well I don’t think that it is sometimes. I think that complaining about bipolar disorder, for example, whether you are a supporter or a survivor is good sometimes. Why? Because it allows you to vent or release some of your tension. It’s good therapy, in my opinion. When you are not allowed to complain, you can sometimes feel like you’re going to explode, and that is not good. Too much complaining is bad, however. No one likes to listen to a complainer, especially if that’s all they do. I think it’s good to let loose and complain every now and then, though. IF you’re doing something about it.

There’s a positive way to complain and a negative way to complain. If you complain and don’t do anything about your situation, that’s complaining in a negative way. Like, I’ve been to support groups and, week after week, the same people, all they do is complain, and they come back week after week, and they’re still complaining. And every week they complain about the same thing. The same people, complaining about the same thing! Till it gets to the point that nobody wants to hear it any more. Do you know why? Because they’re not doing anything about their situation.

But here’s an example about a good way to complain. Say your loved one is having problems with their bipolar medication. It’s giving them all kinds of side effects, and it’s really bothering them. And they complain and complain and complain to you about it. Well, that’s bad complaining, because YOU can’t do anything about it. But if they call their doctor and complain to HIM about it, it’s good complaining. Why? Because the doctor CAN do something about it.

That kind of complaining is positive, because now your loved one can get something done about the bad side effects of their medication. See the difference? That’s what I’m talking about.

Not like the complaining like the people in the support groups who complain to the point where nobody wants to hear it any more. Or those types of people (everyone knows someone like this) who complain about this or that or whatever every time you see them. Or hypochondriacs who are always complaining about things that are wrong with them. And who knows if these things really are wrong with them or not? But they complain about them anyway.

Here’s another example: Say you see a charge on your credit card and you know you didn’t make that charge. If you don’t complain about it, you’re going to have to pay that money. So, in this case, you better complain, right? So there are times when complaining is the right thing to do.

There are times when complaining gets things changed. Like your loved one and their bipolar medication. Or a bogus charge on your charge card. So my point to all this is that sometimes complaining is negative, but sometimes it can be positive, too.

Well, I have to go!

Your Friend,

Dave