Bipolar Supporter? What Does Your Loved One Need?

Hi, how are you today? I hope you’re fine. How is your loved one doing? Are they getting all their needs met? Do you even know what those needs are? Because they may or may not be telling you about them.

Especially if they have a tendency to get quiet, withdrawn, or even to isolate when they’re not feeling right,” or going into a bipolar episode. Unfortunately, it may take a little bit of aggressiveness on your part to get them to open up if they are not. But be careful, as you don’t want to “bug” them. It is important, though, for them to know that you are concerned about them (their behavior).

Some people with bipolar disorder isolate before they go into an episode. If your loved one is doing this, try to catch them before they completely drift away from you, and you might be able to catch the bipolar episode before it really digs in to them.

It might start with a little depression. And if you notice the depression and can get them to talk about it, they might not isolate and, again, might not go into a full-blown episode.

Although this takes some effort on your part, it is worth it if it can keep your loved one from going into an episode.

You may not want to hear this, but I will tell you anyway – It’s at least partly your responsibility

to keep your loved one from an episode by meeting their needs. What are their needs? Do you know? Have you talked to them about it?

Some people with bipolar disorder need to talk and share about how they’re feeling… While others want to be left alone about it, and will see it as interfering if you try to get them to open up. You need to find out which type of person your loved one is, so you can meet their needs.

They may just need a little encouragement from you before they open up. But the result will be worth your efforts. Because you will be helping your loved one.

Ok, so maybe they need to talk. Or maybe they need to be left alone. What else do they need?

Do they need prompting and reminders to take their medications? You can do that. Especially if it will keep them from going into an episode.

Do they need encouragement from you to go to appointments with their doctor, psychiatrist or

therapist? I’m not saying to treat your loved one like a baby, but just to help them get their needs met.

If they don’t want to talk about things, maybe you can at least encourage them to write in their journal about it.

The most important thing that they need from you is your support. Try to get them to tell you how to show it in the best way, in a way that won’t distance them from you or make them mad or defensive.

This should, if done right, make you feel even closer to them and more of a help.

Well, I have to go!

Your Friend,

Dave

  1. Dave I have reading your blog aswell as others.Maybe you just got me on a bad day . Maybe I’m the one in 1,000,000,000,000,000 but you can say all you want about helping , saying words taking the med, bla , bla, bla in the end they are crazy, every one is gone,you spend years trying to spin evey think the do becaue you love them and FOR THE CHILDREN bla. Some will never see a head 2 inchs from there .I sware to god she looks just as dumb as charley sheen “WINNING DUH” she says the same shit. 40,000 to the lawers and the party has just begun . THERE IS NO HELP FOR THE BLIND

  2. my family and i really enjoy reading all these greats news and tips about bipolar ..Thank you dave!! sincerily MARIA

  3. Dear Dave,
    The hardest thing for me as a mother of a daughter with bipolar, is to sense then watch my daughter go into a slide towards withdrawal and depression. In the past I have felt so helpless in the face of that dark cloud that so swiftly surrounds and engulfs my daughter.I try everything from bribing her with a cup of coffee down at the cafe to sitting beside while she is still able to listen and talking about the things she has achieved today and I tell you the list is always long.
    And if I miss the cues that are usually found in what Rachel is saying the topics she is talking about or her personal opinion about some event taking place ( today it was weight gain and Rachel said to me if she talked too much about losing weight she would rather kill herself), before I know it Rachel is in a slide towards a lengthy depressed state, it took 8 hours for Rachel to tip herslf over into that dark space today
    But she didnt go to her room- she stayed out with the family curled up on the couch and went to sleep
    which is unusual because it was only 4.30 in the afternoon. So I am heartened, and I realise I have to be very sneaky, I have to ccatch her unawares -Rachel didn’t withdraw into her room and shut the door. For as long as she was awake I used the opportunity to remind her of the great things she had done today, this week ,the milestones she had past in the last month.and although she fell asleep anyway ( her way of disappearing ) there was a little dialogue happen I am grateful for small blessings. I will wake her for dinner and hopefully I can get to talk some more and hopefully she has taken some of what I have talked about in and hopefully she will respond.
    I do appreciate what you write Dave every time it is so relevant it is reassuring to know that there are others who have are in the space I am in and have found useful methods to reach positive outcomes
    regards
    Shona

  4. Thank you so very much for this email! I’m a supported of a 26 y/o son and it so hard to not come across as treating him like a baby!! I want to do everything that I can to help him and when he is in a mood I can’t say anything right. I have to learn not to take it personally. I appreciate your tips and emails!! I would love to get a group together for us supporters! Any advice on that?? Thanks again!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *