Bipolar Supporter? How to keep this from occurring

Hi, how’s it going? Hope you are doing well.

I was talking to a friend of mine today. She was talking about this horrible fear that she has. She is extremely afraid of trains. She is completely convinced that they are as likely to derail as not. She was telling me that a penny on the tracks can derail a train.

Well, I don’t think she’s right about that part. Maybe back in older times with older technology that might be true. But now days, trains are made much more sophisticated than that. They aren’t nearly as likely to derail as my friend thinks they are.

Unfortunately, dealing with bipolar disorder is a little different. Someone with bipolar disorder is much more likely to ‘derail,’ so to speak, than a train is. As their supporters, it is our job to do everything in our power to keep that from happening.

But how much can we really do? I mean, honestly? Well, the (honest) answer to that is: A LOT.

We can help them make a treatment plan, which is basically like the rails that a train rides on to begin with. Then we can help them to stick to that treatment plan. This is like making sure that they don’t derail.

Helping them stick to their treatment plan is not always easy, but it is doable. You can start by making sure that they make it to their appointments for their doctors, psychiatrists, and therapists. Take away any excuses they have to not go. For example, if their excuse is that no one will watch their children while they are at the appointment, then make sure that they have a babysitter that is reliable and trustworthy.

The next step is making sure that they take their medications as prescribed. This isn’t always easy. Sometimes they really don’t feel like it for one reason or another. But keep reminding them of their goal of recovery, and of how much better their life will be once they are stable.

Remind them of how much worse they do when they are off the medications, and help them to realize how much better they will be if they stay on them. Be prepared to remind them every time it is time for them to take their medications, and there may even be a struggle to get them to want to every time.

This is especially true if they are depressed, because they may not want to get out of bed to take the medications. Take away every excuse, once again. Bring their medications to them, if you need to, along with a glass of something to drink with them.

The next step to keep them from ‘derailing,’ so to speak, is to give them feedback on how they are doing. If they are talking too fast, or if they are sleeping all day, or if they are spending all their money on frivolous things, then let them know. It’s possible that they didn’t even realize that they were doing it.

There are many other steps you can take to keep them following their treatment plan, and you can use them all as tools. The real question is, are you prepared to do whatever it takes to help them stick to their treatment plan?

Well, I have to go!

Your Friend,

Dave

  1. I don’t know where to start. My wife was diagnosed 7-8 years ago and was on meds fro 2 years until her doctor retired. She never followed up with a new doctor because she did not like what the meds did to her anyway. She was weak and could not stay awake even after several med adjustments. I can not get her to see a doctor again. I have not brought it up for a couple of years because it only angers her. She says I am the only reason she has problems. She has no interest in going anywhere with me or sleeping together. In her eyes a better life for her is living alone. I think maybe she’s right. How many of us end up in divorce anyway.

  2. i my name is sue they say i have bipoler . i dont now i really dont care. i have to live with my sister because i have try to kill my alot of times. but my sister is try to help. she told me that she would mad at me and it would hart my kids i take my med. but i still i want to die .i just hate life. but she does keep me go where must time i don’t time to thank about it .

  3. I always feel inspired by your writings and it is great to hear from someone who understands what it’s like to support a loved one with bipolar disorder.

    As a mother I know it is my ultimate duty to make sure my children do well and are successful. My oldest daughter was diagnosed with bipolar at eight and is now thirteen. We monitor her meds daily, make sure she goes to all her appointments, and tell her when we feel she is “off.” This is easier said than done. As she is getting older stability has become more of a challenge as we try to determine what is bipolar and what is typical teenage moodiness.

  4. Hi David,
    I want to thank you for the words of wisdom about bi-polar. The words are confirm so much I know and understand about my illness.

    Sincerely,

    Laurie W.

  5. Hi dave….Bi-polar is a difficult illness.. but once you come to terms an do some reading up on it..its starts to get easier to controle.. with medication..but come on most of us fly off the tack rails every now an then its could being human..it just the bodys reaction to stress..
    Take Care Linda…x

  6. Thanks for your advice, but it does not help me because my wife refuses to take her medication (Symbyax) and refuses to see the doctor. She is bipolar manic 80% and bipolar depressed 20% of the time. Even though she went through this 10 years ago and was institutionalized on 3 different occasions, she does not believe she has any problem … but actually she is worse this time.
    I know she is headed for a train wreck, but I’m up a tree as to what to do.
    Michael N Narducci

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