Hi,

Remember when we were little and we were taught how to cross the street? We were told to:

STOP, LOOK, and LISTEN. Stop at the curb. Look both ways for traffic. Listen for a car that may be turning. Stop, look, and listen. It’s useful advice for the supporter of a loved one with bipolar disorder, too. Think of it as a warning system. Like we have smoke detectors in our houses to alert us to a fire. We have security systems in our homes, businesses, and on our cars to thwart a robbery attempt. Some people think that’s just being paranoid, but I believe it is smarter to take precautions wherever you can. Like the Stop, Look, and Listen idea is a precaution.

Bipolar disorder is an incurable disorder. Your loved one could have a bipolar episode no matter how long they’ve been stable. I know of a woman who was stable for 12 years…But then she had another episode. So it can happen. Now, I’m not talking about riding herd over your loved one or being too compulsive about watching them for symptoms of the disorder or anything. But I am saying that you DO have to keep a watch for symptoms and triggers. You can’t trust bipolar disorder. It will rear its head when you least expect it (like when your loved one has been stable for a length of time). You just can’t let down your guard.

Your loved one needs to do the same thing. They know themselves. They know when they feel “normal” and when they don’t. They may just “feel funny.” But they need to tell you when something feels “wrong.” They may start some acting-out behavior that you can catch right away if you: STOP, LOOK, and LISTEN. For example, they may start losing sleep. Now, in and of itself, sleep loss is not a danger. But if you are watching it carefully and you pick up that it’s been going on for a week, it could be a symptom of your loved one going into a manic episode. The same thing if you note that they are starting to talk a lot, really fast, and changing from subject to subject. If you are listening carefully, you might determine that they are going into a manic episode. What if they start sleeping more and more? That could mean they are going into a depressive episode, so you need to watch for it.

Also, you know your loved one’s triggers (at least you should), so for example, if stress is a trigger for them, and they are in a stressful situation, watch them carefully. They could go into an episode. Knowing the symptoms of bipolar disorder and your loved one’s triggers can work as an early warning system for you. If you do think your loved one is going into an episode, you can call their doctor right away and they can adjust your loved one’s medication rather than put them in the hospital. Or the two of you might decide that your loved one does need to be hospitalized.

But at least you’d have caught it early.

Well, I have to go!

Your Friend,

Dave