Your blog really hit home for me and it has to do with my mother, not me. My mom has Stage IV ovarian cancer and I am her caregiver as I am an only child and my father passed away from cancer in 1977. That said, I had an experience with our family doc’s help that caused me to lose my temper and go off in the office, not on paper. The situation goes as this. I had mistakenly missed that my mom needed a refill for her pain patches. I have to get a new prescription every time because it is a narcotic. Being Saturday the oncologist’s office was closed. I then called our family doctor, who treats my mom, me, and my husband for quite some time now. The doctor is very much aware of my mom’s cancer because he gets everything copied from the oncologist sent to him about mom’s condition, treatment, etc. I know that for a fact because I asked him at one of mom’s appointments if the oncologist was forwarding info and he said yes and he was very familiar now with her cancer case, even the drugs that were prescribed, including the pain patches she uses. Now, I called my family doc’s office to see if he would write a script for just TWO pain patches until I could get to the oncologist on Monday to get the full refill. The receptionist that answered was a real gem. She says, well, I can’t interrupt the doc, I will just put a note on his desk and he will TRY to get to it. I explained that I needed to pick the prescription up in person as it was a narcotic. This girl obviously had no medical training any further than using the computer for appointments. I started to lose my temper after she kept putting me off. I said, listen, the doc comes to the front of the office with the patients and gives the file to the girl there and she prints out the bill and co-pay, etc. Then she takes it to the receptionist where you pay. I told the girl, pull my mom’s file, this is an emergency, I, nor any of my family has ever done this before for refills, and put me on hold until the doc comes up to the counter. All she had to do is roll her chair back and she could see the doc, give him the file, explain what I told her, and I know he will do this because he is a great doctor. She said, well, I can pull the file, but I still am not allowed to interupt the doc, even between patients. Okay, here is where I start to get mad. I told her I will HOLD on the phone until you can put the doctor on, this is Saturday, if I don’t get those patches, and it WAS my fault, that my mom will suffer severely over the weekend. She actually laughed out loud when I told her I would hold. I said, what is so funny? She said well I thought it was funny that you were going to hold when you wouldn’t be able to talk to the doc because we can’t interrupt him. She put me on hold and I was steaming. After a few minutes she came back on and said, the doctor has wrote the script, come and get it. So, she must have miracously been able to get out of her chair and walk to steps to the counter when the doc was standing there. So, all the way there I was asking God to help me not go off and make a scene, all the time knowing my anger had built to the limit of throwing a fit and that is just what I did when I got there. I got the script and I was going to just walk out, but she handed me a piece of paper that the doc had written saying I need to plan better in the future instead of calling in sooner when I needed a script. I blew. I told the receptionist off. I told her, obviously you have no compassion for patients and you do not know HOW to talk to patients, you don’t insult them or laugh like you did, it was an emergency and I told you that. When I originally called she didn’t even know how to spell the name of the patch or what it was. No knowledge of medicine, and to me she was just one who could enter appointments into the computer and take the patients co-pays on the way out. I said, you need to study and train for your job so you know something about conditions, emergency situations, and how to talk and not laugh at patients. Then I asked to speak to the doc, saying I would pay for an appointment, to ask him why he made that comment on the phone message, then I read the phone message and no wonder he did that. She just wrote down that mom needed a refill of a pain patch. Period. No mention of that I said it was my mistake and I was only asking for enough patches to get her through the weekend until I could get to the oncologist’s office to get the full prescription. If he had got the FULL facts, knowing him as I do, he would not have written that note. I was making such a scene, crying and screaming at the girl, that the nurse came out to calm me down, but the doctor never came out, but he could here me. The poor nurse was the one who had to take the flack. She asked the receptionist if it happened just as I said and did she laugh at me and she admitted to it! The nurse said, why did you laugh, and she said because I wanted to hold, knowing that the doctor would never get anything but that stupid note she wrote and wouldn’t get it till the end of the day, and too late for me to pick it up. The nurse was visibly angry. She apologized to me and said that she would talk to the doctor about this girl’s behavior. I never got to talk to him directly, BUT, I had several of my own visits to the doc, and the girl was there once, then I never saw her again, she must have either been moved to another office or fired. Now, when I go in I get the red carpet treatment and I see that their office personnel are being very professional and nice. So, Dave, like you said, you were going to write a letter to the doc. I am not going to give up my doc because of rude people, but you can be sure that I will never be afraid to face them when treated like dirt again! It did produce change, but I still feel bad that I lost my temper because it wasn’t pretty. And being bipolar, when I got home I had to go to bed, I was mentally and physically sick from getting so upset. And another thing, these office people should consider they don’t know a thing medically about the patient or the person representing them or someone who is there with them for various reasons, and they just “assume” since I was advocating for my mother that I too was sick, but she didn’t know that. Imagine someone who is bipolar, and the doc treats alot of bipolars, and out of control or manic going off on his staff because of the receptionist’s snotty attitude and no knowledge really of medicine at all, imagine what really could happen. It could be tragic. AND, I have had some resistance every time I have a test or blood work getting a copy of it for myself. It is your right to have copies of the results. But, believe me, I don’t leave without it anymore, I just won’t put up with it when I know it is my right to have them. I do that because I have multiple other docs that I see for non-bipolar health issues and they always ask me for the results of any recent tests. It saves them time and me time to get the copies. I just take them with me for the appointment and they really appreciate it. The lesson here is to be an advocate for your own health care. You are not obligated to take incompetence and let it go. Think of all the chaos it could cause for the patient, even something that is life-threatening. Those people do not need to be in the medical business in any position without the knowledge of medical issues because they don’t want to have to get up and try to catch the doctor and show him a note from a patient and get it handled right then if it is an emergency, as was mine. There may be a rule to not bother the doc and I know that, but I had no time left, and I was desperate and it would have been a bad weekend for my mom, who suffers much pain from this cancer. It also caused me to be more vigilant in taking care of my mom’s meds AND mine so no one runs out of something and have it end up in this kind of situation. But, as for interrupting the doc, there are exceptions to every rule, and I feel an emergency situation is the exception. The doc was willing and I knew he would do it, but having to wade through the endless people you have to go through to get anything done is no fun. So, Dave, you were right to post your experience because it does apply to us bipolars, we have it tough enough as it is.

Just read the post … David, that is APPALLING!!! That receptionist is lucky you aren’t BP, one in super aggressive manic mode, or she might have been drilled with holes .. and I for one would have cheered you all the way, mate. Even reloaded for you! (Okay, may be that’s overkill, but then I’m BP and I “do” overkill!) No, seriously – something like that would send me reeling and damn near (if not) murderous.

First of all, Dave, how did the doctor’s office GET your Mom’s phone number? And why on Earth didn’t he call YOU with the information? Obviously, your Mom didn’t know what the test was for, but even if she did, and it was POSITIVE, that could have thrown her for a loop.

You have EVERY right to write a letter to that doctor. Besides betraying the confidentiality between doctor and patient, he had the gall to go “behind your back” and inform a disintereted party about your results. I would have been RAVING mad at this point.

My caregivers – psychiatrist, PCP, Pain Specialist, and therapist – all share their information like tests with each other, so that, for example, a pill is ordered that won’t interfere with my bipolar meds. I put this confidential release in ALL my files, for their information AND responsibility.

Good luck in getting your voice heard. It may be the ONLY communication this doctor gets – but it is a “lalapalooza!”

BIG HUGS to all bipolar survivors and those who love us. Please pray for Susan; she’s not doing too well right now. And save one for me – got news today that my CPA did NOT file 2004 taxes EITHER!!