Bipolar lesson: Do you have this to help you?

==>>Help with ALL aspects of bipolar disorder<<==
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for all aspects of bipolar disorder by visiting:


How’s it going?

I hope you had a great day yesterday.

I think I really shook a few people up
yesterday about my email and looking
for a magic solution to every problem
with bipolar disorder–the fact that
one does not exist. From the responses
I got, I think I really have pushed people
into the right way of thinking of bipolar

With that said, a number of people emailed
me about what do I mean about having plans
for handling Bipolar episodes.

I wanted to address this today in my daily
email–a plan for bipolar disorder.

Basically I have a plan for virtually every
situation that I can think of that could happen
with my mom and bipolar disorder.

It might sound like a huge gigantic task
but it’s really not.

Basically what I did is look back in
the past at my mom’s bipolar disorder
episodes. Then I made a list of the problems
and what happened and went wrong.

Then I brainstormed other things that could
happen. Then I began to sit and make plans
to address each situation.

After three years now, I have a complete
list of solutions to virtually all the
problems. It also helps that I have 8 people
who work for me with bipolar disorder and
I have tens of thousands of people on my mailing

Virtually every concept that I have is included
in my main courses/systems below:




The bottom line is, with bipolar disorder
you have to plan. You have to stay on top of
things. You have to think about what happen
in the past. You have to think about what could
happen in the future.

You have to look at patterns and make

Then you have to be solution oriented and
make a plan.

You know, most people in life just don’t have
any plans. It’s kind of strange. I constantly have
a plan for everything. I guess that’s just the
way I am. I have a workout plan, eating plan,
bipolar plan, business plan, volunteer plan, writing
plan, etc., hiking plan, etc.

There’s a quote by Napoleon Hill. It says,
“people don’t plan to fail, they
fail to plan.”

It’s amazing to me, how with bipolar disorder,
how little effort people put into planning.
They put more effort into complaining about
bipolar disorder then they do planning.

I have found, the key with bipolar is planning.
I know I keep repeating myself but I want to get
the point across loud and clear.

If you know of someone who is a successful bipolar
supporter besides me, or someone who successfully
manages bipolar disorder, ask him/her if having a
plan was one of the major keys. I am very positive
the person will say yes.

There are people that came to me more than 2 years
ago. They were a wreck. Constantly worried about
what was coming around the corner. Now when I talk
to these people they are relaxed and not worried.
Bipolar disorder is still in their lives but they
have a plan and having a plan cuts down on anxiety,
stress, etc.

Ask yourself this question: “On a scale of 1
to 10, with 10 meaning you have the greatest plans
ever and 1 meaning you have no plan for anything
at all, how do you rate yourself?”

If you are less than a 7, what are you going to
do to get to a 10? And if you have been less than
a 7 for a long time, please understand that
whatever you have been doing is not really working
and you need to change direction.

Well I have to take off, catch you tomorrow.

Your Friend,


P.S. Don’t forget to take a look through the
different programs I’ve put together… each one is designed
to help you with a different area of bipolar disorder whether
you have it or you are supporting someone with it.
You can see them all and get the details by visiting:

PIP’S. Check out my F.ree blog with copies of emails
that I have sent in the past and lots of great
information for you:

P.P.P.S Check out my F.ree podcast. Hear me give
mini seminars designed to teach you information
you can’t learn anywhere else.

  1. I recently began a relationship with a woman who was honest enought to tell me that she had been diagnosed with bi-polar disorder, and that she takes topamax to control her manic/depressive behavior. And although I have come to love her, and understand why she has personality swings, I am now resigned, sadly, that I can not enter into a long term committment and give her what she wanted most, children. I guess I should thank you for the email that I received from you. Was it fate? Serendipity. I’m in pain now.

  2. Bill, I am not happy with your comment at all. I would not be who I am today, healthy, if it weren’t for my husband of 18 years. We have three wonderful children and I am properly medicated. I am a better mother than most people who are not bi-polar and this is no lie. I did not use medications while I was pregnant because I did not know I had it. There is no reason why adoption should be a problem for anyone who does take meds or is afraid to pass on the gene. For two years my family had to suffer with my illness, but once I was medicated properly I was back to better than normal and life could not be better. If you love someone it should not matter what is genetically wrong with them. If she was violent that would be a different story. Shame on David for misleading you!!! People who acknowledge their illness and have taken steps to manage it are not to be labeled with those who choose to ignore it and continue to wreck havoc on other peoples lives. Just as David pointed out in todays email, planning is vital. If you were disabled with a limb d— you would still want someone to love you for life wouldn’t you????

  3. I can not recall when I did not plan. Somehow I always slip through the cracks and end up in a tailspin. My first defense is to recognize what is happening to me. The second action is to call my Shrink. Ninety nine times out of a hundred he tells me to take more medicene and if I get worse go to his office. By the time I get to his office I have racing thoughts, spending money with abandon, arguing with anyone that’s near me,relive old fears that I will not be independant,fearful that no one wants to share a life with me. I have this mantra that bipolar ruins every aspect of my life.James

  4. Married for 7 years, I am CONVINCED that my husband is bipolar. I had to kick him out last February because he was toxic to our family. His mother was long-ago diagnosed Manic Depressant and is prescribed Lithium. SHE REFUSES TO HELP ME & THINKS HER SON IS PERFECT. Her & I no longer speak. My husband says he’s fine, that it’s ALL ME. My biggest hurdle seems to be GETTING THROUGH to him that it IS him. Any mention of this is guaranteed to unleash the fury of the beast, so I don’t mention it anymore. He is getting worse. For the sake of our 4-yr old daughter, I’ve got to do something. I took my vows “….in sickness and in health” VERY seriously. Please, someone, help me. It’s taken me a year of SERIOUS research to find this site, and that was AFTER I figured out that he is bipolar.

  5. I enjoy your comments. Still cannot get my husband to see a doctor & get diagnosed. He has all the traits of this disorder. I am at a loss to get him to listen, he just evades or gets angry.

  6. I was diagnosed with bi-polar disorder a few months ago. I always wanted to know why I was so upset all the time for no reason and why I was always sad. I always yelled at my husband for no reason and if he wasn’t referring to me in his conversation with someone else. I would get mad for nothing. Then my parents started paying for my therapist visits. He then diagnosed me with manic depressive, split personality, and mood swings which is all bi-polar disorder. I was so scared when he said that cause I thought people would look at me like I was crazy, but they don’t. My parents won’t except that I am bi-polar they say that I am just making things up even when my therapist said so. They just think that noone in their family could have this disorder. So I had to look for another support group. Which is my husband, my sister, my grandparents, my therapist and my good friend Amanda who is bi-polar also. With out them I don’t kow what I would do. I don’t have insurance yet and I am not on medication yet, but my husband and I are dealing with my episodes just fine. My therapist gave me a referral to Shands ( the hospital here in Jacksonville, Florida ) to get a card for people with low income. Since I have a referral they said it shouldn’t take to long, but until I can see a doctor my support group is all I have to help me through my episodes. So always support those you love. People with bi-polar disorder are the best parents ever. I have 4 kids altogether. I have 2 and my husband has 2 and our kids know what is going on and they are doing great. Their teachers say we are the best parents. So people with bi-polar can still have kids and a loving family. They just need to PLAN it right.

  7. Dave, for 15+ years I had the perfect plan, it is called alcoholism. I prefered being thought of as an alcoholic than being “crazy”. People figured I was both. It took 10+ years of behavioral training, self taught, and constant searching for a good Dr. that was able to work with me and get it under control. Mind you it took time and much trial and error but I’m doing very well. I’ve learned the warning signs, own no credit cards, debit only, and go to 3 12 step meetings, a men’s Bible stdy as well as church. Oh yeah, I have a theoropist too. As far as plans, I’m not sure, I do know it’s easier to put out a camp fire than a forest fire. I have a couple sponsers and accountability partners that I can call in a crunch. If I miss 3 days in a row without working out, that’s a dead ringer that I’m getting caught up.
    My methods might might not be the best for everyone but I’ve been living with and studying this beast for 30 years. I was needing a break. 🙂

  8. In my city we have a procedure called (302). This enables aspouse or loved one to involuntarily hospitalize that spouse or loved one who is acting out in a mania or depression james

  9. Dave, what a blessing you are.!!!My husband is bipolar,and his neice and the worst one is his mom. She has had police chase her down the street, while waving a butcher knife at them. It’s amazing she hasn’t been shot yet! Thank God the police in our small rural area know she’s sick. But just wanted to tell you how much I appreciate your info daily. Keep up the great work! Thanks from the bottom of my heart. Wanda –

  10. To BILL: I am sorry that you consider it “serendipity” that you learned something about bipolar disorder. You don’t have to have biological children, if it’s the genes you’re worried about – you all could adopt. If one or the other of you is infertile/sterile, then that is another matter. LOVE in and of itself, is what is important. I am bipolar AND infertile. I have been married twice to wonderful husbands who both died before their time. In both marriages, they didn’t last five years before they died – BUT -I wouldn’t have given ANYTHING for the love we shared and the time, though brief, that I had with them. Shame on you for giving up on LOVE just because the one you love has bipolar – like Tere said, if she was PHYSICALLY disabled, would you have felt the same way??

    I guess I rate about an 8 as far as planning is concerned. Living alone, I have no 24/7 support to recognize when I am going into an episode, so I rely on my shrink and therpist to perform this job. I take my meds religiously, get enough sleep, and keep appointments with the staff at the Community Mental Health Clinic. Beyond that, I don’t see what else I can do. It is a proven fact that a manic episode CAN/WILL “creep” up on you when you’re lease prepared for it. There are no guarantees that I WON’T have another episode. BUT – it has been 30 years since my last hospitalization, so I must be doing SOMETHING right!!

    Thanks, Dave, always for your emails. They are always fodder for discussion and thought.

    BIG HUGS to all bipolars and the ones who love them. God loves you, and so do I.

  11. My boyfriend has bipolar and Thanksgiving and Christmas are hard times for him. For Thanksgiving we are going to have a simple ham dinner with all the trimings or go to my family’s house for dinner. For Christmas we are making homemade gifts for everyone. I came up with this ideal because Christmas is about two months away and he was starting to stress on what to give everyone. He like this plan and is all happy about being in the kitchen making candies, breads,muffins and cookies for gift giving.

  12. I have an adult daughter who is bipolor and has done very well. She works and does a great job every day and never misses work. The customers of the store really like her and she is a happy and go lucky person. A positive attitue has helped her a lot. She has come a long way since becoming a bipolar. She had hit the bottom but came back and is determined to do the best she can do. Her 15 year old son loves her a lot and she is an outstanding mother. I am so thankful for the information in the e-mail sent to me.

  13. For those of you out there who are bipolar, I’m desperate for ANY advice on how best to try to communicate w/ my husband. I realize there is no “magic” word to solve all the problems. I am currently only an expert on what doesn’t work, I’m in this fight to get him to acknowledge that he has a problem, get in to see a doctor, and then do something about it, all by myself. His family will not help. I have these huge hurdles in front of me and I can’t even get him over the first, and most important one. I need help.

  14. My son(29) is in the hosp. today is his meeting day to determine if he needs to go to psyc. hosp. instead of behavioral unit. He has been in and out of unit 3 times since May. 3rd major episode in 7 years. Takes his meds. but his system must change every few years.
    He is still very delusional and angry. I just hate to see him be even more restricted. His Drs. outside of unit are awful. 15 mins. every 3 months for meds only. But that is what he gets on SSI. Any questions to ask at todays meetings would be appreciated.

  15. Dave, You wrote: “It’s amazing to me, how with bipolar disorder,
    how little effort people put into planning.”
    Don’t forget those of us who struggle every day just trying to survive. It takes a lot of time and energy just to live with bipolar or live with someone who has bipolar disorder. My husband has bipolar disorder, takes his meds, sees his Dr. and Therapist and that’s it. Doesn’t read about it, try to help himself recognize signs, or listen to me if I see a sign. So he has lots of down time and occasional manic stages. Not like before he was on medication. But every day it takes all my energy just trying to stay on top of everything. If only I had time to plan.
    Thanks for your emails. I’ve learned a lot and try to put into action the things you write about.
    If only he would.

  16. TITANIA- It seems you and I are in the very same, frustrating situation. Maybe together we can help each other. Until I can get my husband in to seek help, in the meantime, I’m trying very hard just to understand what it is like to have bipolar, what it feels like. If I could see it from the eyes of the sufferer, I feel like I might have a better chance relating to my husband. What characteristics are sufferers aware of? Can they be in a manic state for years?

  17. Mari S, you and I are in the same boat. I had to ask my husband to leave a month ago and it about killed me. He is adamant that he is as “solid as a rock” but he is definately bipolar or something very like it. The past year has been the hardest of my life and the worst part is that until he and his parents realize that something is very wrong I am without the ability to even discuss my/his/our problems in an honest, open, and solution oriented way. Everyone’s avoidance of the truth is really creating even more problems and making my behavior seem odd as I’m the only one operating as though my husband has some sort of mood or impulse disorder. I need a friend and I think you do too. Let me know if you’d like to email. I’m 36 and in my 7th year of marraige and my 13th year of a commited realtionship to my husband. I’m also one year into weekly therapy and it has really helped me to deal with this. Email me if you’d like to exchange.

  18. You dropped my penny, that explains my problems. when i get sick, moody and tired as normal my partner immediatly goes into an episodes. I need a plan for these days so I can prevent them.

    Cheers DAvid

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