Hi,
How are you today? I hope you’re doing well.
I saw a cartoon the other day and the last frame of it showed two dogs looking up at a scarecrow with a bird on top of it that was saying: “All our fears are made of straw.” I thought (especially for a comic) that was pretty profound when I thought about it.
So many people are paralyzed by their fears. In fact, there are whole mental disorders based on fear, like phobias and anxiety disorders. And for people who have them, they can be paralyzing, and awful to have to live with. They even have to alter their lives and their plans to work around their fears. I’m not just talking about fear of spiders or snakes. I’m talking about fear of going out of the house, or fear of being around people, or something called Generalized Anxiety Disorder or Panic Disorder. These people live with anxiety and panic every day, in situations that you and I live with normally.
Well, people with bipolar disorder live with fear as well. Like the fear that comes with stigma.
That’s the fear of being different, or “less than,” or “not good enough.” Many people with mental illness feel that way.
But people with bipolar disorder have distinctive fears.
Such as:
• Fear of being someplace and going into an episode
This is a very real fear for many people with bipolar disorder. In fact, many will not even make any plans because of it. Even if they’ve been stable for awhile, they are still afraid that they might be someplace and lose control, going into an episode.
• Fear of medication
Some people have heard scare stories from others about how bad medication was for them, and they listen to them, fearing that the same thing will happen to them. Mostly, they fear the side effects, which can sometimes be pretty bad, but in reality can usually be controlled. Still, they are afraid.
• Fear of losing control
Some people, even if they are stable, are still afraid of losing control. They may have been stable in the past and then been in a situation where they were triggered and lost control, so now they are afraid of it. For example, they may have been triggered and started talking fast and a lot in a social situation and got very embarrassed, and now they are afraid that it will happen again.
• Fear of being hospitalized
I know a woman who was so afraid of being hospitalized that she wouldn’t even go to the doctor. She was afraid that if they “locked her up,” she would “never get out again.” She ended up going into a terrible episode and had to be involuntarily hospitalized by her husband.
• Fear of other people finding out that they have bipolar disorder
Some people are so afraid of the stigma against mental illness in general and bipolar disorder in specific, that they are afraid of anyone finding out that they have the disorder. They go to great lengths to keep their disorder hidden from other people, even if they are experiencing signs and symptoms of an impending episode. For example, they will use sick days from work to hide them.
Some of these fears may not seem so bad to you, but to the people that have them, they are very
real, and very frightening. Even though you and I know that “bipolar fears are made of straw” and cannot hurt them, people with bipolar disorder hold onto their fears. The only way they can get rid of their fears is by support and counseling (therapy). The more stable they get, the more they will see that their fears are unfounded.
Well, I have to go!
Your Friend,
Dave
Post responses below
My loved one has such a big fear of another episode that stops him from doing almost anything. For instance, he is afraid of getting creative, thinking it could bring on an episode. Much more likely drinking alcohol would lead to this. He had quit drinking for about 3 months and was all in all much happier and healthier. He started again, when he was feeling a bit down and the drink always makes him feel worse. I will have to speak to his psych again and see if he can talk some sense into him. I am very concerned.
Dave,I’m afraid you’ve been misled somewhere along the way. I have had bipolar disorder for 42 years, and, though stable (not hospitalized) since 1977, I am STILL afraid that a bipolar episode is lurking just around a cerain trigger. My three hospitalizations shook me to the core; I wasn’t expecting them, but – BAM – they hit anyway, even while I was on meds. I think it is a “cautious” fear that we bipolar survivors ALL have. For instance, did ANY of us KNOW we were going into a bipolar episode the FIRST time we experenced it?? I dare say, NO. In the past 3 months, I have had enough stress and triggers to have driven me “crazy” when I was younger. BUT – I will STILL experience “panic attacks” for no reason, and am on anti-anxiety meds for that very reason. Now, I’m planning a vacation trip that requires me to fly to Denver from VA, with a layover in D.C. “going, and a layover in Detroit “coming back.” This causes me some anxiety that I’ll make the connecting flights I have to make on time. Normally, this wouldn’t “throw me,” but in my hypomanic state, I just might. You can’t generalize that ALL bipolars do NOT have fears of episodes “creeping up on them;” this is a REAL fear that we ALL must learn how to deal with.
BIG HUGS to all bipolar survivors and those who love us. May God bless you real good. I continue to pray for my country.
Nice article. Thank you for this info