Hi,

You’ve probably heard of the concept of doing things “One Day at a Time,” right? Many people have. In fact, many people, bipolar or not, live their lives that way. Twelve step programs have One Day at a Time built into their programs, too, and people follow that. Why? Because it works. Many people can’t handle things any other way. If they try to take things more than One Day at a Time, they get stressed out or overwhelmed. That’s the truth.

But today I want to talk about something similar. I want to talk about those people who even get stressed out and overwhelmed trying to take things One Day at a Time. For those people, I would recommend an Amish saying that I heard, that goes, “Do Ye Next Thing.”

That means you don’t even have to go as far as taking things one whole day at a time – you just worry about what’s in front of you at the moment, and deal with that. Instead of being overwhelmed by everything at once, you only take one thing at a time and deal with that. It works really well when you’re dealing with a loved one with bipolar disorder.

Because their moods can shift so quickly and so often, sometimes you never know what you’re going to be dealing with at any given time. Their behavior can be so unpredictable. And that can be very frustrating. If you try to deal with their bipolar behavior as a whole, it can become overwhelming for you. But if you try the “Do Ye Next Thing” method, it might simplify things for you, and take away some of that stress.

For example, say your loved one is depressed. Your first reaction might be, “Oh no, they’re in another bipolar depressive episode again.” Whoa! Slow down! Just because they’re depressed does NOT mean they’re in a full-blown episode (at least not yet). Remember “Do Ye Next Thing.” Deal with what’s in front of you. Try to communicate with your loved one. Maybe there is a reason for their depression.

There is something called situational depression. In this case, there is something that happens that directly causes the depression, and when the situation is over, the depression goes away.

I know one case where this woman had bipolar disorder, and her young son had moved back home temporarily, causing her to get depressed. As soon as he moved out again, she stopped being depressed! It was a situational depression, not a bipolar depressive episode.

Her supporter still got her to see her psychiatrist, and she still did need a short-term medication adjustment, so they didn’t ignore it, but at least she didn’t have to go to the hospital or anything.

That’s because they used the “Do Ye Next Thing” method of coping. They dealt with just what was in front of them and nothing more. They didn’t make more out of it than there was. They didn’t panic or get stressed or overwhelmed, as many people would have in the same situation.

It could be the same with your own loved one’s bipolar behaviors. Just because they exhibit one bipolar behavior does NOT necessarily mean that they’re going into a full-blown bipolar episode.

Now, don’t get me wrong, you should still be watching for signs and symptoms of an episode so that you can catch one early, but don’t overreact, either.

Just deal with what’s in front of you to deal with. The “Do Ye Next Thing” method helps you to do that.

Well, I have to go!

Your Friend,

Dave