Hi, how’s it going? Hope you are doing well.
I was talking to a friend of mine the other day. He was complaining in a sort of jokingly way about a “generational curse” his family had. Apparently all of the men in his family had curly hair. But the women all had straight hair.
It didn’t make sense to anyone in his family. None of the men liked their curly hair. Yet all of the women wanted curly hair. It was completely one of those “the grass is always greener” situations. But this friend of mine wasn’t making a big deal out of it – he was just laughing about the whole situation.
It made me think. A generational curse? Well, I know of something else that could be considered a generational curse: Bipolar disorder. I’ve heard some people call it that. I’m not sure it’s the best description of it, but that’s the way some people choose to look at it.
The reason some think this is because there is a genetic connection with bipolar disorder. People who have immediate relatives who have the disorder are more likely to develop it themselves. But that doesn’t make it a guarantee.
Science calls this a genetic predisposition. What that means is that the person is more susceptible to developing bipolar disorder, should their environment and their brain chemistry mix in the right way. But it depends on a lot of other factors, as well. Even identical twins aren’t guaranteed to both have the disorder if one does. So there’s no guarantee that if your mom or dad has it that you will, also.
I’ve actually heard some people freak out about this. They are afraid that just because their mother/father/brother/sister/aunt/etc has bipolar disorder that they are doomed to get it themselves.
What they don’t realize is that instead of freaking out about it and stressing themselves out, they could instead be taking measures to prevent it. Yes, you heard me right. Prevent it. Even someone without bipolar disorder can benefit from stress management, mood management, and anger management techniques.
And you never know for sure if you really are genetically predispositioned to bipolar disorder. If you are, it might just help you to avoid the onset of bipolar disorder, or at the very least, to minimize the intensity of the disorder.
If your loved one has bipolar disorder, and you feel that you are at risk for developing the disorder, then take some practical steps in your own life. Look at the techniques you are helping your loved one to learn, and then bother to learn them yourself. This will help you, and it will also help them; after all, people learn better by example.
Of course, if you feel you already have developed bipolar disorder, or you are not sure, then you should see a professional to determine your diagnosis. You may have bipolar disorder, another disorder, or just high stress levels.
But don’t bother worrying about genetic predispositions – instead, act to prevent them.
What are your thoughts on this?
Well, I have to go!
Your Friend,
Dave
Post responses below
In my family we jokingly call it the “lastname” woman’s disease. Several of the women on my fathers side of the family suffer from bipolar and or another mood disorder.
I’m connected to your ideas and I’m connected to others too.
I’m against the idea of generational curse. If you have a bipolar disorder you have to dedicate your energy and money to control it and then you have to take the most out of the amazing inteligence that comes with it.
It is not a curse. It is a challenge, yes. But once you control it, it can be better to have it than not to have it.
I have a question. Are you saying that even if your are predispositioned to have Bipolar Disorder, you may not develope it if precautions are taken? I was predispositioned to have Bipolar disorder, myself. I had no issues until a signifigant, life altering event happened to me when I was 13 (I was sexually molested.) After this happened I developed full blown symtoms of Bipolar disorder. It wasn’t until I was 22 that I had a total breakdown, was hospitalized and diagnosed with Bipolar and adhd. I was put on several medications and what a relief it has been. Thank you for your daily information.
Jamie Collins
My mother was crazy. She died alone an alcoholic’s death of congestive heart failure when I was away in the service in 1983. I had previously had an episode I can call a nervous breakdown during the second semester at University. All my brothers and siters seem aware or sensitized keenly about mental health issue 25 years later. I went to a Psychiatrist briefly in the early 90’s all he did was put me on lots of Lithium at my request. It was a terrible drug for me and the new substitutes or alternative like Haldol or Prozac are not the answer. I took myself off the Lithium after 4 or 5 yrs because taking it caused my thyroid to shut down and I was turning into a ZOMBIEBOT which became clear to me after I stopped taking it. I am listening to you anyway.
I never really thought of bipolar disorder as a generational curse. Athough it really seems to fits the description of one. I have used a lot of self help books and have done a lot of research. I have found that it is really helpful to apply anger management and stress managment techniques.
A GENERATIONAL THANG RIGHT? – LIKE AUTISM – ALWAYS ARRIVING LATE BUT BETTER LATE THAN NEVER, I SAY!!!
It was completely one of those “the grass
is always greener” situations. – THAT STATEMENT IS RIGHT!!!!!!
THIS MAKES ME think and appreciate – BE NOT ANXIOUS
Hi Dave.Te escribo en español porque me expreso mejor que en inglés. Yo no tengo el desorden pero creo que mi esposo sí, estamos divorciandonos y despues de leer las características de esta enfermedad estoy casi segura que si hubiera sabido cómo tratarlo estuviéramos juntos. En este momento él vive con otra mujer y me ha pedido los papeles del divorcio. El vive ahora en italia no en ecuador donde yo estoy y estos 20 meses separados han sido terribles, con altibajos y desapariciones. Mi interés es quererlo ayudar a que busque ayuda para que continúe con una vida mejor aunque no sea conmigo. El material del kit que estaba pidiendo era para enviarselo a él o a su hija mayor. En todo caso gracias por iluminar mi mente y por su interés.
Saludos,
Teresa
dave I have bipolar disorder, I go to psychiatrist every month and I have a lot of STRESS I MAEN ALOT OF STRESS My family has nothing to do with me. you see when my Dad passed in1998 then my Daughter passed in 2007 then my sister she got killed in2008 I just couldn;t take any more I have stress seizure and they said I have Bipolar disorder, I am about to snap so that is why i wah=nted your DVD
THANK YOU
CHERYL COLEMAN
A Generational Curse? = On my mothers side of my family there were 7 brothers & sisters. There is at least one of their children that have bipolar. One in each family. I wasn’t aware of this fact to only a few years ago. I have had bipolar for 24 years and am the oldest. My mother was diagnosed with depression but from what I went through my sister & I know she was really bipolar. She passed away at only 51 years old. We feel she only sought help when she was depressed and given antidepressants which made her mania worse. She never got the proper help. I guess the signs of the times. But when you said “A Generational Curse” I couldn’t help but respond with our particular situation.
my mother had disorder that was calledmental she was very abused to us kids thay should of thew her in jail for all what she did to me. back40 yrs ago the law did nothing to protect me. thanks ur friend sharon
I disagree with you on this one. Bipolar Affective Disorder is not something you have a “genetic predisposition” to. It is something you either have (because you inherited it) or you don’t. My symptoms started when I was barely walking. That is not a “predisposition”– it is because I inherited the disorder and had it at birth. Just because some people take a little bit longer to show severe symptoms does not mean that they didn’t have the disorder to begin with. The symptoms were there– they just weren’t as severe and were not noticed. Here is the reality: just because there are people in your family who have a certain trait, that does not mean that everyone in your family has inherited that trait, no matter how genetic it is. If you have not displayed any symptoms then don’t stress about it. If you haven’t developed the disorder by the time you reach adulthood, and you can’t point to anything in your behavior or experiences that would indicate you have it, then you are not very likely to ever get it. I don’t believe the vast majority of people who are diagnosed bipolar right now really have the disorder. It is the latest fad in mental illnesses, so it is being overused.
Also, the steps you mention help everyone– and that means everyone! Therapy can help anybody, but it has no effect whatsoever on Bipolar Affective Disorder, which is caused physically. No matter how much therapy you get or how many coping mechanisms you develop you will still have the disorder and you will still need to be treated with medication. The disorder has not improved– it is just that the person who got the therapy has learned how to deal with it a little better. They are not the same thing.
I completely AGREE with Denise. I noticed early on that I was “different” from “normal” people. In my Middle School years all the way to graduation from High School, I would spend HOURS batting a tennis ball against the side of our garage, making up scenarioes in my head and “talking to myself.” I don’t know what my adopted parents thought of this behavior, as they never said anything about it. These were my “fantasies,” and I NEVER divulged them to anyone. I had my first “breakdown” at 20, and was hospitalized 3 times in my 20s for mania. I am 62 now, and have not had a REAL manic episode since I was 29.
As I said – I was adopted. When all of my adopted family (and my husband) passed, I went loking for my biological mother, whose name I knew all my life. In 2003, Omnitrace had tracked her down. I made contact – and she accepted me as her “eldest” daughter. The first thing she told me about my geneaology, was that my maternal grandfather was a paranoid schizophrenic. Since then, my Mom was diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder two years ago. This makes a “perfect storm” of the disorder being GENETIC. I have 3 younger siblings from the same Mother and Father – and none of them have any signs of Bipolar. I “took it for the team!” Seriously, finding out that it was NOT my “fault” that I had a mental illness was liberating. I suggest that any Supporter look back in their geneaology to see just WHERE the “genetic predisposition” came from for their loved one – there are ALWAYS answers.
I disagree with Denise that “cognitive therapy” doesn’t work. That, combined with finally finding the right cocktail of medications, has helped me to cope through the deaths of my family and two husbands. Without the opportunity to “vent” – perhaps something we could all benefit from – I would probably still be a dysfunctional bipolar. I had the same therapist for 40 years, and as we grew to know each other so intimately, I grew and matured with the illness.
BIG HUGS to all bipolar survivors and those who love us. May God bless you real good. I continue to pray for my country.
My grandmother was scitzophrenic, manic depressive with delusions of grandure and was sometimes catatonic. She endured the electro-shock treatment, harsh chemicals and multiple hospitalizations. My greatgrandma heard motor cycles on the roof, etc. Well my grandma had five children. Two scitzo, two bipolar and one with major depressive disorder. My mom; Six kids; three diagnosed bi-polar, one severely antisocial (undiagnosed, disowned the family) and one scitzo. Oh yeah, my brother died at age 27, lucky b*st*rd. That makes 6. I was once hospitalized at the same time in the same hospital as, who I found to be my cousin. Couldn’t be genetic.
My name is Lynn and I’m an alcoholic. I also live w/Bipolar disorder on a daily basis.
I believe that there is a genetic link to this disease. My dad never got his self-esteem back after ‘battle fatigue’ [it was called then], and he took his own life. I was only in my early 20’s when it happened. [I have since made peace w/that, having visited his grave in a Vet’s cemetery in Wisconsin, USA.] When I was first diagnosed, I had fear and anger abt. this. I have since realized–and accepted–that I don’t HAVE TO repeat the actions my dad did. Also helps to remember that he was likely inappropriately treated, and also didn’t take his medications properly all the time. Anyways, as always, thanks for listening.
My grandson, who is bipolar at 19, fears that if he has children in the future, that they might not be normal. He says that because he has been give medication since he was five years old, and so many medications, because they said it was impossible for a young child his age to have bipolar like his mother. So he feels that his genes all all mixed up or destroyed. Could this be a possibility?Sincerely yours, pam
I have two children with bipolar. I don’t know of anyone with bipolar in the past but my mom had depression and I have a brother also on antidepression drugs. I believe there is a connection. My daughter has been taking True Hope for 4 years and is doing very well. I know many who have recovery from True Hope,but you have to play by the rules-NO POT,or Alcohol or other rec. drugs. Our son hasn’t got that yet and in this last year has been hospitalized 4 times.Right now on lithium and has gained thirty lbs. in the last 21/2 mon. My daughter also had gained 60 lbs. in 30 days on the drug cocktail before True Hope. Go to truehope.com
Thanks for your e-mails David we are using them to help educate our son.Dixie
I am very familiar with this. Although I am not the side the genetic predisposition comes from, I have read, studies, learned, gone to conferences, seminars and spoken to way too many specialists about bipolar. My son’s grandfather had it. His father has it as one of his many problems. And my son, with the right mix of environment (serious levels of stress, chaos and trauma) and brain chemistry, developed it in the last year also. The difference is that I took my son immediately to an excellent psychiatrist who was able to figure out the right medication on the first try and I give my son his medication at the same time every day so he does not have to suffer the cycles and burn out his brain cells in the process. What is clear is that folks with this disorder cannot have any chaos in their lives or it makes it 100 times worse! And I have been very clear with my son (as have his doctors) in that being alcohol free is going to have to be a way of life so comorbidities don’t make his life a failure.
I have been diagnosed with Bipolar NOS. I have been reading as much as I can about this subject since diagnosed back in 2007 while I was in the active army.
I do believe that it is a generational curse but normal as well. Through geneology I have traced to two different people that it could have come from. It seems to me that every generation from that point on has had been mis-diagnosed or undiagnosed. I can see tell-tale signs in my little brothers which I found a book in the library very helpful.
I am also beginning to think that Bipolar was normal back throughout history. People would be violent, short tempered, but on the flip side there has been alot of literature, music, and other art that has become of people with Bipolar. I wouldn’t call Bipolar a curse. I just think that society has evolved differently than it has been in the past. Society is becoming more tame and less original.
I do not think BP is a generation curse anymore than any other disorder..Just like any disease it can happen to anyone. I’m not sure I agree that people have a predisposition to BP and I definetely don’t think trauma or stress in someones life causes it. My daughter began showing signs of BP by one and a half and was diagnosed at eight. My mother in law has clinical depression and other than that nobody else has any type of mood disorder in the family besides my daughter.
IT’S A GENERATIONAL THING AFTER ALL; LOL!!!! I AGREED WITH A COMMENT THAT WAS LEFT WITH A PERSON THAT COMMENTED ON 8/19
In my family we jokingly call it the “lastname” woman’s disease. Several of the women on my fathers side of the family suffered fromt this type of disorder. lol!
THEY ALL FOUND OUT THE SOLUTION WAS: GET MARRIED, HAVE CHILDREN AND YOU’LL FIND YOUR DISORDER DISAPPEARING
Well It does seem to be linked genetically. On my wifes side it seems to affect second born women especially. However the part about prevention is a good one as my youngest daughter has been using various techniques for a few years to control the peaks it often can bring. IE alot of meditation, yoga, and self awareness to identify when those emotions begin to take over. Not sure how she shuts them down but she is doing well without medication. Still getting out of the valley of depression is not as hard but accepting it seems to help her and she is patient for it to leave. Chooseing the right environment and people is another plus that allows for acceptance of the sometimes quirkiness that bipolar can reveal. Thanks for the this service you provide to shed some light on this difficult emotional condition.
Don’t kid yourselves BI POLAR ILLNESS IS A GENETIC DISEASE. I am 63 and in hindsight probably had it since my late teens although I was not firmly diagnosed until 1995.I have done all the usual things…spent about 2.5 million $..a sex addict…marriage failed and time in jail.
My mother and her sister were bipolar…the sister was killed in a shootout at a bank robbery in California. My mother’s sister had a boy and girl. The girl turned out fine and she & her 2 daughter became drs. However, the male had a beautiful wife & a 3 yr old girl. He smothered the girl and then shot him self. The whole family is scattered with murders and suicides.
At 63 Yrs I am unstable as hell, can’t get treatment
and I hope it ends soon because I just can’t take anymore.\
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