How’s it going? I have been thinking. I have two more emails
for this series about bipolar disorder and episodes. If you
missed the other emails, you can get the complete list of them
by visiting my blog. The link is below.
Today I wanted to tell you about something that I just really
learned in the last 30 days. Why did I just learn it in
the last 30 days? Well bipolar disorder is REALLY complicated
and so are the other mental illnesses. I am not all knowing
but learn as I go. I have a lot of knowledge but don’t
Since I am actively supporting my mom, have 8 people
that have bipolar disorder who work for me, have at least
30 people that I do business with or are friends that
have loved ones with bipolar disorder, I am able to
learn a lot every day.
Well in the last month, I learned this and it was based
on my mom’s most recent episode. If you didn’t hear
or forgot, my mom went into a quick episode in the last
month or so. We caught it and it’s totally under control.
The entire ordeal took about 10 days instead of the normal
6 months in the old days. Because we have a tremendous
system in place we were able to catch the episode much
faster and then help my mom get back on track really quick.
Without a system, normally this would take 1 to 2 years.
Anyway, here is the big warning I was telling you about.
My mom told me BEFORE she started to go into the episode
she told her doctor and therapist but was ignored.
I didn’t believe her at first. Why? Well it’s because 50%
if not more of what she says during or closely after an
episode is not true. How do I know? I check and verify
everything quietly. Meaning if my mom says something,
I don’t run around and say “you’re lying” rather I
simply take it all in and go and check it out without
making a big scene.
Well I investigated her claim of telling the doctor
and therapist and it was true, she did. The doctor
was suppose to see her in 2 months and then after my
mom said she wasn’t feeling well wanted to see her in
2 weeks. The therapist at the time who was a new therapist
who was TERRIBLE, never changed his mind and wanted
to see her in 6 weeks. Which makes no sense to me.
Anyway, my mom pointed out that she told me that she
wasn’t feeling well either. I was thinking to my myself,
ME??? And I did nothing?” She said yes. Then I thought
long and hard and guess what…
SHE WAS RIGHT SHE DID KIND OF TELL ME
I remember one day I can’t remember what day, my mom
told me like 45 minutes of information and in the middle
of the 45 minutes of information, she said she didn’t
feel right. She might have said this for 1 minute
of the entire conversation.
I missed it.
When I looked back on all my mom’s episodes and talked
to my dad and my mom’s mom or my grandmother. We all can
remember there were times my mom said she wasn’t feeling well.
And then went into an episode.
In her 2004 episode which was the big one you have read
about if you read my course/system descriptions, she
asked to be put in the hospital but the doctor
didn’t do it. She actually asked the doctor and he didn’t
do it. Although 80% of what she told me around this
time was not true, that statement was true. She did
ask but the doctor did nothing which lead to the
gigantic episode I have written about.
Here’s the deal. First let me say this, if you have
bipolar disorder and you are in and out of episodes
and wind up making things up, it really hard for people
to believe you with anything. Right now, I would say
95% of my mom’s friends and family will not believe
anything she says. It’s sad but true. She thinks
it’s not fair.
I have a system of being able to determine what is true
and not true. Generally my mom always will come to me
to get a message to others because she knows people
will believe me if I say it’s true.
NOTE-If you want to know what my system is, it’s hard
to explain and I can’t do it hear because that’s not
the focus of this email. Some have recently gotten mad
at me for holding back on things. Hmmm. Since I have
spent more than $20,000 producing all this free stuff
I would say that I haven’t held back too much :).
Not to mention I volunteer in THREE mental illness
groups and I provide more for free than all of them
do combined in a year. AND this is not because of me,
it’s because of the INCREDIBLE and I mean INCREDIBLE
team that I have. I have so many good people that work
for me it’s amazing. Super smart. Very good.
Way better editors than me :). When you look at what
you get from me, everything all the courses, all the material,
it’s because of a joint team effort. My team is the
So to be clear on what the warning is, it’s multifold:
-A person with bipolar disorder can go into an episode
and can let people know. You have to really pick up
on it. It’s tough. Like my mom, many people will not
scream and yell I am going into an episode call the
doctor but will say something that is subtle. You have
to pick up on it. I have a bunch of forms and checklists
I use to figure this out for myself. If you have my
course I use the same ones in my bipolar supporter
-Many doctors and therapists will not take people with
bipolar disorder seriously. It’s sad but true. So
if a person with bipolar disorder wants to be seen,
you the supporter may have to demand it. You may
have to get tough on these mental health people.
-If you have bipolar disorder, and you have told a number
of lies because you were in episodes, you are going to
find it difficult to get people to believe anything
you say. It’s sad but true. This is another reason
you always want to make sure you are staying stable and
doing EVERYTHING NOT just a few of the things you need
to do to stay stable. Pay attention to my stability
equation that I spoke about via email last week or the
one in my bipolar disorder success course.
-Don’t think the mental health system or people in
the mental health system make all the right choices.
Generally I have found, they don’t. So if your loved
one with bipolar disorder wants to been seen and
the doctor/therapist doesn’t have them seen right
away, don’t assume things probably aren’t that bad
because if they were, they would see them right
away. This is a wrong assumption. How do I know? We
assumed things like this all the time.
Keep in mind, my mom was suppose to be seeing her doctor
in 2 months when her episode first started. My mom contacted
her and she changed 2 months to 2 weeks. One might think,
well that make sense. In 7 days that occurred from the point
my mom talked, she turned into a completely different
person who was super angry, looked horrible, make
terrible threats, screamed, yelled, and created huge
problems in the family and made up the most terrible
things which people believe. For example, told my relatives
I was stopping her from going to church because I didn’t
believe in church. Imagine that.
There’s a lot to learn. I encourage you to do one of
two things. Either go out and really go and find
good information on bipolar disorder by finding people
who are good supporters, successful people with bipolar
disorder, talk to doctors/therapists, and learn a number
of these strategies and techniques. OR you can
take a look at my courses. I don’t want to push anything
on anyone. If you have the time and desire do it
yourself if not, you can get my stuff. It’s up to you.
SUPPORTING AN ADULT?
SUPPORTING A CHILD/TEEN?
HAVE BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Well that’s the warnings for the day. I hope you are learning
some things. Although these emails are not going to get
an “A” in English class, the content is what is important.
I work hard at this. I really do each morning so I hope
you enjoy them and they are helpful.
I have to run. I have a million things to do. Hey before
I go, look at this email it’s funny.
“Hi David Oliver, my name is danbi. I like your mails.
You help me with my sister. You information is very
good and helps me. You write like me and I like that.
Thank you and you are good friend.”
When I read this, I had to laugh. Danbi isn’t from
America and he thinks we write the same way I think
maybe I write a little better I hope :). LOL.
I really have to run. Catch you tomorrow.
P.S. Check out my F.ree blog with copies of emails
that I have sent in the past and lots of great
information for you:
P.P.S Check out my F.ree podcast. Hear me give
mini seminars designed to teach you information
you can’t learn anywhere else.http://bipolarcentral.libsyn.com