Am I a Baby? Shocking Bipolar Lesson


How’s it going?

I had this advertising firm that I did a $5,000 test with.

What does that mean?

Well when you test a new company for advertising, the tests are normally like $5,000 to $10,000.

It’s NOT free to find people interested in bipolar disorder even though many think it is.

This is why I have to charge for all my resources because not only do I have Research and Development costs, payroll costs, fulfillment costs, but I also have big adverting costs.

Anyway, this young kid contacted me and convinced me to run this $5000 test.

I wanted to give him a shot because he was young and new to the business.

To make a long story short, the entire concept was a total scam.

I was scammed out of like $4,500 to $5,000.

The kid promised I wouldn’t lose any money and also promised to make good on the money I spent.

He tried but his boss was difficult and was a scammer.

Anyway, the kid transferred the call to his boss (the boss who was nice to me BEFORE I PREPAID (stupid on my part), the money to him).

Now on the phone the boss was cold. He screamed and yelled at me.

He called me a FU$#@$@ baby and a scum#$%@#$%.

Now, I have never in my life paid a company money and had the owner of the company curse me out.

NOTE-There’s a bipolar disorder lesson coming soon : )

Basically he used every curse word in the world in front of the word baby.

He would call me a scum#$%#$ baby. A fuc#$%#$ baby. A piece of shi#$@5 baby. (I took out the letters so to make this email family friendly). Anyway, you get the idea.

I got super mad and took control of the conversation and explained to him that he was a total conman and should be ashamed of himself.

He got mad and to make a long story short got mad because I called him a conman.


ALL conman never liked to be called conman. I wonder why?

Anyway he hung up on me.

I told my friends about this and they were like, “What are you going to do?”

I told them how I was going to deconstruct what happened and figure it out, then reconstruct it to make sure it never happens again.

Ok, so what’s the bipolar lesson?

When something like an episode happens or something bad happens with a doctor or hospital…

Sit down and figure out why.


Figure it out.


Then make sure it doesn’t happen again.

I know how I got scammed.

I gave someone new a chance.

I prepaid.

I didn’t check this company’s reputation.

I got too friendly with the sales kid.

And other things.

With bipolar episodes, you may find that you ignored your stability equation.

In my courses/systems, I teach about all the different parts that make up the bipolar stability equation:




But I’ll talk about a few of them here, because it’s so important to my point.

Say you let one thing slide, like sleep.

Then you let another thing slide, like your health.

You started isolating.

You start doing other things wrong…

And the next thing you know…

You’re in a bipolar episode.

You see how easily it can get out of control?

So the next time you need to do what I did.

DECONSTRUCT it. Figure out what you did wrong.

Then RECONSTRUCT it the way it should be.

That way you can avoid the next episode and protect your stability with bipolar disorder.

Has this ever happened to you?

What do you think of my technique so that it won’t happen again?

David Oliver is the author of the shocking guide “Bipolar Disorder—The REAL Silent Killer.” Click Here to get FREE Information sent via email on how and why bipolar disorder kills.

  1. Deconstruct & Reconstruct = very sensible rebounding technique for anyone, not just for bipolar folks! I figure that the only real “mistake” in life is to neglect learning from our ordinary “mistakes” – they’re each valuable learning experiences! So what if they cost us something? Everything costs something, if not money then time, effort, etc. Think of what folks spend to receive a college education. Comparatively speaking the $ 5,000.00 lesson is not so exceptional – though it is most unjust and you should be able to take some kind of legal action to hold the conman accountable for his actions and I encourage you to do so – even if you do no more than report him to The Better Business Bureau and similar places. When we take action against conmen we are also discouraging them from victimizing more folks.

    thanks for the time that you invest in bipolar issues 🙂

    another useful processing tool that I learned years ago is called: S.O.D.A.S. – it works like this:

    S ituation (state the situation clearly – on paper if you need to

    O bservation (observe the issue carefully)

    D ecision (make a decision about the situation you have observed)

    A ction (take action to resolve the issue)

    S olution (those steps should lead you to your solution) – note: sometimes the solution is to run your issues, one at a time, through the S.O.D.A.S. method but if you continue through the process until your specific detailed issues are exhausted you’ll end up with solutions for sure! It’s a simple, uncluttered, well ordered approach that avoids having bundles of issues becoming overwhelming.


  2. David you are very good at relating things to bipolar disorder and you make a very good point about constructing and deconstructing to avoid making the same mistake in the futurel.
    Don’t feel to bad about being scammed we are seeing 4-5 people a day in our business who are being scammed. If you paid by credit card/bank debit card you should have some recourse through them. If you paid by check file a police reoprt and talk to your bank representative they may be able to direct you.

  3. ….been there, done that……AND you learn from past mistakes! I definately know what to do next hospital visit!! If you have any comman sense, at all, it shouldn’t be hard to figure out where things went wrong & just don’t do it THAT particular way next time…..try something else!

  4. Great email with advice thats very sound – difficult to do if you are bipolar – not easy – but well worth remembering to TRY to follow to stay well and to get back up again quickly when the going gets tough – as it inevitably does with this condition!

  5. Deconstruct. Reconstruct. Great advice.
    I have been in a deep depression since December, 2008. I am doing exactly what you have suggested and I am now moving forward. I have carefully examined the nature of my depression. When is it at its worst? When do I feel slightly better?
    This self-examination has led me to examine the side-effect Akathisia. I have recognized that I am living with chronic, severe pain. It is the pain that is depressing me. When I am in pain, I do not want to do anything. I can’t focus, even on the hobbies that usually bring me pleasure.
    I have other medical conditions that produce pain, so my situation is not a simple one. However, I have put myself in a position where I must examine the SSRI’s that I take. I see this as progress.

  6. This is all well and good when the bipolar person takes ownership and tries to help himself; but there seems to be nothing the supporter can do if he doesn’t. It is totally frustrating and does no good if the supporter is doing all the work and the bipolar person just feels sorry for himself and goes to bed to get away from the world.

  7. I have been into the bipolar cycling through my life for more than 20 years.

    Your advice is sound. I know that things are not going well when my sleep starts being disrupted (as it is now) and recognize the fact that I can already be well on my way to a depressive (or manic) episode.

    I try to catch it early. Unfortunately for those of us who are rapid-cyclers, things can take a sharp drop, fast.

    Your progression of how things can deteriorate is also like you know, personally, how the process often unfolds for me.

  8. Very good advice, but I don’t know how a bipolar person would be able to deconstruct and reconstruct when he is really not fully responsible for his behavior when in an episode. Very good for others also. S.O.D.A.S. is also good and can be very useful. Thanks all of you.

  9. Hi Dave, well I applaud you for at least realizing that it was a scam! So many people don’t realize it until alot later than you did.
    I do have a question for you, and a statement. I’m bipolar and I think I’m having an episode right now. I would like some advice from you as to how I can be sure?! I’m feeling very lost, untrusting, and weird all the time, but not real sure what to do about it. Would you please respond to this email and let me know how to tell and what to do, PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  10. David, I thought you knew a lot about bipolors but I see that you put the behavior of us back on us. I really resent that. I am a high functioning bipolar but I know many people that have a hard time figuring out what is real and what isnt. And I dont know how you can justify putting the blame for something that someone else does (like your conman) back on the bipolor and have them carry the guilt for being conned. You are not a bipolor so I dont know how you could have been conned so easily. I would never have fallen for something like that. Now Dave how did it feel to be blamed for the action of someone else.
    We have clinical depressions, not ordinary depressions, so we cant put our finger on what is causing the depression and all the self examination in the world wont make us able to figure it out.
    I would like to comment on Judiths response to your letter. Judith I am assuming that you are the supporter, not the bipolor, because if you were the bipolor you would have a better understanding why some go to bed to get away from the world. There are times when the very best thing is to go to bed and wait for a mood change to happen. I imagine that if you tell them they are just feeling sorry for themselves, you are in no way helping them to overcome what is happening emotionally to them.
    Sorry if I stepped on anyones toes, but if you dont put your feet in the aisle then people cant step on your toes.

  11. I, too, feel like I’m going into some kind of episode. I acknowledge that I am in “mixed episode” mode, but I am TRYING to “head it off at the pass.” My GREAT Christian friend and counselor prayed for me today – and I got a “rush” like I usually get when I go manic. Because she is such a good friend, I don’t WANT to stop seeing her, but feel it is somehow detrimental to my sanity. As my mania unfolds because of spiritual delusions, do you feel this is the road to take? She’s helping me monetarily with my lawsuit against the conman (which is turning ugly), so I CAN’T very well exclude her from my life.

    I am under GREATER stress with the lawsuit now. There is some confusion about WHICH man took the money from me: the father (who I gave the check to), or the son (who signed the Promissory Note). I am TRYING to sue the father – who was my boyfriend at the time – but was confused by finding out that the father was a “Junior” and the son was a “III.” This opens up a can of worms for me, and makes me go to a LOT more trouble than I had planned on. My Christian friend is CONVINCED that I “rest on the promises,” but it’s so hard, as the “Jr.” is evil to the core. Does anyone out there have any advice?

    Hindsight is ALWAYS sooo much better than foresight when you deconstruct and reconstruct. While you’re in an episode, it’s HARD to identify your triggers or stressors. IF, and I say IF I go into a manic episode, I CAN look back and see where it came from. But – being in the PROCESS of feeling weird – I can’t tell…

    BIG HUGS to all bipolar survivors and those who love us. May God bless you real good. I pray for my country.

  12. i am sorry what happen to you.i think when you think that you can trust some one, and some thing like what you went throuh, you learn a lesson. and you think that it can not happen to you . i think that man was excited because he got what he wanted and express him self with anger to get his way, like bipolarrrrr. thanks bea excuse my spelling.

  13. Dave thanks on the advice to “Deconstruct” and “Reconstruct.” I’m a visual learner. I have the jist of the idea but could you draw it out a little for me. I need a better grasp of it.


  14. To PAUL: I’ll try to explain. What I “think” Dave means by “deconstruct,” is to look back AFTER the episode (manic or depressive), and try to identify the triggers that led to it. This can be something as simple as not getting enough sleep, too much familial stress (or stress on the job), NOT taking meds (to feel “high”), or any one of a number of things that threw you into the episode.

    By “reconstructing,” he means what you can do AFTER the episode to NOT fall into the trap of your triggers, and maintain as stable a mood as possible. GET your sleep; alleviate stress; take your meds.

    Basically, it’s just another way of having you recognize triggers and avoiding them in the future.

  15. i watched a television show – My wife and kids today and it was entitled “Be Careful What you Wish For” the wisdom of this is – some people can start enabling or attracting all the wrong support systems in their own treatment because the allow themselves to either “babied” or “supported” a certain way that they all too well know doesn’t make them comfortable.

    for example, you wouldn’t answer to a name that you know is not yours or admit to an age, you’ve yet to arrive to would you?

    When a person needs help, they know exactly what they want and how they want it…..taking control in one’s situation is one sure way to alleviate “triggers” that will make a condition worst than it actually is.

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