Hi,
It’s 7:08am on Saturday and I wanted to write some
important Bipolar Disorder updates.
These last few weeks have been really difficult.
The growth of this organization designed to help
people with bipolar disorder has been staggering.
I never expected so much growth so fast. Also,
contrary to what “experts” told me, people
really like my daily emails.
As a result, I have been working around the
clock to get everything running smoothly again.
Now don’t fall asleep on me, there’s important
Bipolar updates and lessons coming. Hang on..
I run several businesses. Most people just think
I do this. This doesn’t pay my bills. It’s not
designed to. My other businesses do. Fortunately,
I have great people who run them so that’s why
I have so much time to devote to the bipolar
cause.
For example, there is woman named Jenifer that
now handles one of businesses from A to Z and
this has allowed me to save a lot of time
to do other things.
I was thinking last night on a few things while
I was doing my cardio and trying to drop my
body fat from almost 10 percent back down to 7.5%.
I was trying to remember why I was able to get so
many things done so fast with my mom.
If you’ve gone through my courses/systems here:
SUPPORTING AN ADULT
Visit:
http://www.bipolarsupporter.com/report11
SUPPORTING A CHILD/TEEN
Visit:
http://www.bipolarparenting.com
HAVE BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.survivebipolar.net
You’ll notice that I did get a ton done. Now
if you get one of my courses/systems it’s super
easy for you because you just follow the simple
instructions and great things start to happen
for yourself or your loved one.
BUT, I didn’t have a system and here’s the one
thing I did that made all the difference. I found
people to help me. If you look at the various
parts of bipolar disorder and the problems it
creates, the number is many.
When I was starting, one of the first things I did
was make a list of ALL the problems I had to deal with.
Then I prioritized which was most important and I worked
on the most important first.
For example, I was looking at my old notes from mom
and when I started helping her. Here’s some of it:
Figure out what she has
Find out how to stop or fix it
Find a doctor to help her
Find some people who have it and stopped it
At the time, I didn’t know really what she had so I called
it “it.” I didn’t know who to make her “normal” again so I had
how to “stop” it.
Obviously as time went on, I figured a lot of stuff out.
But those were some of the first things I was working on.
BUT, when you read the descriptions of my courses/systems
you notice that I talk about research, which I did
a ton of. BUT I also sought and found experts for various
aspects of her illness or problems from her illness.
For example, I had no idea how to buy a car without good
c.redit, no jog and below what the car dealership paid.
I had no idea how to figure out how much a car dealership
paid for a car. SO, I located an expert. I paid him and
he taught me SOME of the secrets. He didn’t know anything
about bipolar disorder so I had so “add on” to his plan
because it was specifically for people with bipolar disorder.
NOW, instead of running around and trying to do it all
myself, I found someone to help and then I did a little
work to make it work perfectly.
This is what I do with this Organization for Bipolar Disorder.
I get a ton done every day and can run so many things
and have done so for 15 years because of these principles.
I am NOT in a 15 to 20 manic episode. People write me
and say, “Are you sure you aren’t bipolar, you do some
much stuff and come out with things faster than I can
read or listen to them.”
It’s called having a team and time management. When I was
a kid my mom wasn’t doing well sometimes. Well many times.
My brother was never around. My dad was never around. My brother
told me to read books and learn to give me something to
do since I was unsupervised a lot. He told me to improve my
skills. He would yell at me if I didn’t.
When I was like 16 or so he demanded that I read books
on time management and project management. He was
really big, like 300 pounds, so I would always agreed.
I am not sure why he did this but it turned out
to be a great thing for me.
There are MANY people that help me make it happen. Probably
15 or so. It’s not just me. This is why we jointly make
the best material and it comes out so fast. It’s because
it’s a BIG TEAM of people.
So this is how I get so much done. Learn from me.
When you are dealing with bipolar disorder, you have
to approach it like a giant project with mini projects.
You build a team over time, but try to do it as fast
as possible. Some people on the team will not be that
good. Then you replace them. That’s that how I did it.
That’s my secret.
This is what you need to do with
bipolar disorder. For example, if you have bipolar disorder
you’ll notice in my Bipolar Success Course/System one
theme that I have is get a great doctor/therapist.
Once you have one, they are on your team. NOW, when
you want to find out about various treatments or what
your possibilities are or limitations are, you talk
with your team. NOW maybe you could go out and figure it
all out yourself but that’s way more difficult and you
will probably make mistakes.
Like today, I am going to my accountant to talk about
all these different taxes. He is on my team and I let
him handle that area. This way he makes recommendations
to me and I can just follow them if I choose. I don’t
spend weeks on end learning all about taxes.
Some people NEVER get anything done with bipolar disorder
because they don’t take the team approach. There are people
on my list and I know that there are several people
that are going to get mad when I say this but
they have spent YEARS trying to figure things out
I don’t think they should be figuring out.
For example, there is one person on my list who is
learning all about medications BEFORE she recommends
her loved one take them. That was two years ago when
I first spoke to her. Her loved one’s life is a disaster
and so is this ladies. BUT she is working hard to figure
it all out.
I asked her why don’t you get a great doctor and leave
that to them. I hear stuff like “Oh I don’t trust
them and they won’t tell me everything.”
Imagine people running major companies function
like her.
Now I know there is one person in particular who is
going to get mad about me saying this kind of thing
to you.
Actually she wrote this to me in an email:
“I read your emails and I feel like you are writing
them with an admonishing tone…these people are
searching for this information because they are in
pain, they are riddled with worry, and confusion and
doubt and fear.
They are less than who they really are because they have
been beaten down by an illness that has taken it’s toll
on their loved one and as a result has killed a part of
them as well…..imagine feeling like that and then
opening your email looking for support to find that
you have an email telling you that you’re blowing it
because you’re not learning fast enough, searching
hard enough, reading enough books or doing the right thing.”
Here’s the deal, I have NEVER criticized people for not
learning fast enough, searching hard enough, reading
enough books, or doing the right thing.
BUT what I have criticized people for doing is being
way off in outer space figuring out stuff they do
not need to be figuring out for themselves or their
loved ones to become stable.
Again, if you want your loved to become stable, you
need to find a great doctor and trust him/her, you
don’t need to figure out exactly the 16 reasons why
medications work or how the human brain functions.
Unless you are a student, professor, researcher, work
for a drug company, etc, there is NO REASON to spend
years trying to figure this out ahead of finding
a doctor/therapist, getting great h.ealth insurance,
determining how you are going to pay for treatment,
figuring out how to i.ncrease your
income to support yourself or loved one, protect your
m.oney, etc.
Make sense? I am not the kind of guy that sits by
and doesn’t say anything when people are wasting their
time and going in a direction I think is wrong.
Remember I am not running for office. I am not
the politician that is going to try to please everyone.
Many people like my material some people don’t. There’s
a remove link at the bottom of EVERY message. Anyway can
use it. My goal is to go to bed at night knowing that I
said what I really felt was important and what people
need to hear not what they want to hear.
For all those who have used my f.ree consultation
certificates (for non medical and legal questions because
I am NOT a doctor or lawyer and don’t play one on
TV) with my courses/systems OR I randomly called
you because you wanted to talk to me (yes I do do that),
I always ask you “Do you want me to tell you what
you want to hear or what you need to hear.” Ever since
I have asked people that 100% of the people have said:
“What I need to hear.”
So that’s the deal. Hey I ran out of room here. I had
so much to tell you. I have to do it tomorrow. I have to
head off and put some stuff in storage and then head
over to the gym to catch some morning cardio. Then
to the library. Then to my accountants. Then to my
computer :).
Check your email tomorrow and I am going to give
you an update on people I am going to be hiring,
new f^ree things to help you, new courses I am coming
out with, a new coaching program I am possibly thinking
of to help you increase your income.
I will talk to you tomorrow.
Your Friend,
Dave
I have been reading your emails almost daily now. I am still trying to figure out if this is a scam. No offense meant to you. It has been my experience (so far) that Internet offers usually end up benefitting the one making the offer financially and leave the consumer disapointed. I have still not made up my mind. I will continue to look into what you are offering as I am in desperate need of help. I believe in letting the buyer beware. Especially since people who have this problem in their lives usually have financial issues and can not afford to spend money with no results. I hope this is real. Thank you.
I have an adult daughter who is bipolar and she is married. The whole family has suffered many years before we learned that this is what she had. My husband and I believe that vaccinations may be the culprit in causing this disorder like it does autism. We have 14 children and the daughter with bipolar is our oldest and the only one that got vaccinated. After that we decided against vaccinations because of much research on it. We felt it just was too risky. Years later after this child developed we always wondered why she was different than the rest. I wish someone would take a survey of all bipolar people and see if they were vaccinated when they were a baby. Also see if there are people who were not vaccinated at all that are bipolar. This would be an interesting project. What do you think?
Minnie
hi dave…
if you are still looking for positions to be filled and are hiring some personnel,, please keep me in mind. i would love a bit of new steady work, and for a good reason too. please contact me, at shallimar777@aol.com.
i only work part time in the morning, and i could use the extra money, and doing something creative and helpful in the process.
thank you in advance…
joy leipzig
Well, I think you are super! Instead of walking away,you stepped up to the plate and did something. That’s a real MAN!
Thank you so much for your emails, I always look forward to reading them. You mentioned job openings, where does one apply for these openings? I worked with the mentally ill for about 7 years and I covered 3 counties and eventually had to quit because I didn’t have enough help and my mental health was at stake. I sure do miss helping them. Anyway god bless you and keep up the good work. Belinda
I feel as if I have found a friend. I am raising teen grandaughters as a result of my youngest daughter having an overload of “wild” genes. Then I found out from one of them, that my daughter had been on Lithium at one time. A light bulb went on in my head (I’m a retired nurse)and I thought “no wonder”. Most of street people have psyc diagnosis and instead of taking RXs, medicate themselves with booze and street drugs. That was my daughter!!! Still I have problems with communications with her, because her “truth” is so different than mine. I am to blame for all the bad things that has happened to her in her life. I caused her to be a drug addict/ alcoholic and promiscuous sexually. I was not a Beaver/Cleaver mom, but I did the best I could while being absent from the home working as I was a single Mom. She was cared for by her older sister who was a teen when she was born. She was one of 7 children being raised by a mother who had been an only child. So you see I was in the dark about sib rivalry and fighting. I read all kind of self help books and the standing joke is that I raised my kids with help of “Dr Spock”‘s book on child raising. I don’t feel so alone anymore. Thank you so much. Dorothy
David, That was me you quoted in your letter this morning-and you’re wrong, I am not mad about you saying any of this-no need to assume that because I gave you my opinion about the tone of some of your letters that I will get mad when you offer your opinion. I was trying to offer you another perspective. I wish you had contacted me prior to quoting me and posting my opinions out of context.
I have been doing this bipolar thing with my husband for over 12 years and we have been doing it very succesfully-no blame, no shame-just do it and beat it. My husband is a medical professional, never misses work, is well respected by his peers, colleagues and friends and rarely lets the bipolar beast win-it’s been a decade since he’s allowed an episode to escalate beyond titrating meds on our own.
I think what you are offering is a wondering thing. Although I haven’t ordered your course I’m sure it is full of very valuable information. I do however stand behind my original comments about the tone that ocassionally comes across in your daily emails-you come across like “I did it all, My dad blew it, I did it right , I’m a hero, I saved the day and if you don’t do it my way you’re not doing it right”…that’s how it reads from here-I might be the only one thnking this and that’s fine-don’t want to start an argument, I would just like you to understand, having run live and on-line support groups for those supporting a BP loved one, every presentation of bipolar disorder is different. Every diagnosis is different, every supporter is different. Bipolar disorder is a very nasty illness, one of the most difficult to diagnose and the most difficult to treat…and once you get it right, resistance to meds, side effects, or breakthroughs occur….it’s not a matter of read this course and do what I do…..it’s lifestyle adjustment and it sucks the life out of people….just be kind David-
as a matter of fact, here is my letter to you in it’s entirety and I don’t think you should gleen from this letter that I would be abgry at anything you say-I think it was a nice supportive note to you and at the same time, offering a perspective that you may not have considered.
“David, wonder if I might offer a little ‘constructive criticism’. I’ve been
at this bipolar thing for a long while myself. My husband was hospitalized
twice before I knew him. He spent a lifetime with parents who were of the
generation I’m assuming your father is-they didn’t do the right things for
him. They just figured that he would eventually snap out of it, see the
error of his ways and do the right thing….then along comes Mary-proactive,
strong, determined, in love and willing to fight the good fight-we’ve been
married over a decade and together for years prior to that-I, like you did
the research, read the books, ran a support group-I know this illness inside
and out-I also know what it’s like to be married to this illness and to lose
oneself in the wake of it all.
I found your webiste while doing some research for a friend. I logged in
thinking I might find some interesting things-while I’m not going to pay for
your courses, I have been reading your emails and I do find them interesting
but I do also, now here is where the constructive criticism comes in-bear
with me-find them to be a little bullish. I see that your intentions are
noble and I do understand the plight you’ve lived as a child of a bipolar
parent-but I read your words and I feel like if I didn’t know what I know
and was solely relying on this email to guide me, I would feel guilty as
hell for not having the energy to do what I need to do……being a parent
or a spouse to a bipolar person is exhausting. It is draining. It leaves us
with guilt, pain and shame like no other. In the midst of my husband’s
diagnosis I became isolated where before I was gregarious and outgoing. I
became depressed and confused because I always had to have my eyes open. I
was reading everyday, calling doctors, seeing therapists….I was doing all
the right things but I was wasted.
I read your emails and I feel like you are writing them with an admonishing
tone…these people are searching for this information because they are in
pain, they are riddled with worry, and confusion and doubt and fear. They
are less than who they really are because they have been beaten down by an
illness that has taken it’s toll on their loved one and as a result has
killed a part of them as well…..imagine feeling like that and then opening
your email looking for support to find that you have an email telling you
that you’re blowing it because you’re not learning fast enough, searching
hard enough, reading enough books or doing the right thing.
David, change with this illness does not come over night-a diagnosis doesn’t
come overnight-sometimes, like with my husband, it takes years to get the
proper diagnosis-Bipolar Illness is one of the most difficult mental
illnesses to treat because there are so many components and levels-everyone
reacts differently to meds, every ‘caretaker’ has a different level of
tolerance, ability and strength and some caretakers are so beaten down by
the time a diagnosis is reached that they themselves have lost their own
ability to cope…I know that what you’re doing is done with the best of
intentions. Who wouldn’t want to share what they’ve learned when they find
something that works but is it possible for you to ease up a little on the
guilt trips? I get the message you’re trying to convey-we do need to be
advocates, we do need to educate ourselves, we do need to find the right
doctors the right meds and the funds to finance these endeavors-but we also
need to be treated with kindness and gentle persuasion….not everyone
operates with the same determination and energy that you did in helping your
mom and as I did in helping my husband. I am a strong woman with the thick
skin and a pair of brass ones…but I occasionally fell apart and got lost
in this illness-it tears us down and rips us to shreds and what we need as
those who love one with bipolar illness is not admonishing guilt laden
emails but a firm loving push in the right direction…..
I’m just sayin’
ME
Hi Dave–thank you for your daily newsletters. I know you’ve always stressed the importance of a loved one with bipolar disorder, fininding a good doctor and taking his meds consistently, but I’m wondering if you’ve ever touched on the subject of when you run into the problem of a loved one (in my case, my boyfriend, who’s 36), seeing a doctor/therapist regularly, and taking his meds, but STILL feels the need to abuse alcohol. Especially in his darker moments, he still feels the need the feel altered. He becomes nasty, during those times, says terrible things to me, but honestly even after 8 months, I still can’t distinguish from what he really means in that state, and what he doesn’t! He has broken up wit ME several times, and then calls the next day, like hey, I was drunk, I didn’t mean it. There’s times when I want to walk away, but I haven’t, yet. Thanks for listening. – Debbie
Hi David,
I don’t suffer from bipolar, I have the close and often mistaken for disorder, schizophrenia. However I do street ministry and have met many people who do have bipolar and may or may not be receiving help for this disorder. I have many problems with psychiatrists I meet because they will not believe me when I tell them that I have learnt (over a period of 37 years since my disorder was first diagnosed, I’m 52 now)what triggers an episode with me and how to minimise that happening. I now also have a malignant brain tumor (no, I’m not trying to associate one with the other and never have) and unfortunately having learnt from terrible experiences, will not go anywhere near a hospital…no matter what. You see, in this country, there are a huge number of ‘public’ psychiatrists who do not have the same understanding of the disease that I have. For instance, my medication for my disorder was withheld from me for over 12 hours when I was last in hospital, and combined with the stress (one of my three major triggers) of being there actually triggered an episode. I understand the hospital’s need to monitor medication, but I do not agree, and neither did my then doctor (she has since retired unfortunately), she knew how important it was for my medication routine to be upheld especially when I was experiencing a stressful situation, having already diagnosed that stress actually limits my metabolism of my medication. Yes, I agree with you about the importance of having a good doctor on one’s team, unfortunately in my country, when one is a pensionner on disability support, one cannot access these people as they are not willing to charge the ‘public’ fees that allow us to see them. Private health insurance will not cover us (even if we could afford it) because it is a ‘pre-existing’ illness. So you see, those of us who suffer mental illness in this country are largely left with inept doctors who have little understanding or ones that have just started their internships. I pray that at least some of these interns will come to understand that there are some sufferers who understand their own disorder and have worked out treatment regimes that best control it (prior to the last admittance to hospital for cancer related illness I had been episode free for over 7 years…in the two days I was in hospital I experienced three episodes, mainly because my medication regime was altered to suit the hospital). Yes, I know many will dismiss the above as the ramblings of a psychotic, but I know, as does God, that they are not. I realise that my faith too is considered to be a symptom of my disorder and needs to be medicated away…this has proven impossible in the past, because my faith is the only thing that keeps me going day in, day out, and enables me to reach out and help others who have not the advantage of receiving correct medication and treatment. I agree with you that there are way too many people who regard the medications for those suffering mental illness of any description as something to be avoided at all costs…and I am so sad that their loved ones are the ones who suffer as a result of this belief. Yes, of course there are side effects associated with any medication, but one has to weigh these against the benefits of having the disorder controlled, something that is impossible without these much needed medications given at the right doses for the individual concerned. God bless.
Hi Dave–thanks for your daily newsletters. I know you always stress the importance of a loved one with bipolar disorder (in my case, my 36-year-old boyfriend), to have a good doctor and to consistently take their meds, but have you ever touched on the subject, of someone who does do those things,(plus he sees a therapist) yet STILL continues to abuse alcohol? In his darker moments, he still needs to feel altered. He gets very nasty with me, sometimes in that state, has threatened to break up with me several times, and then the next day, of course, well, I was drunk, I didn’t mean it. Plus, even after nearly 8 months, I still have a hard time distinguishing between between things that he DOES mean, and things that he doesn’t. I’ve thought about leaving him several times, but I haven’t, yet. Thanks for listening, Debbie
Different places especially daycares and foster homes would appreciate it if you would offer low or free certificates for credit hours. I been on several classes on bipolar and all they say is what it is not how to deal with people with bipolar. I was once on a class that even the teacher and students ask what to do and all were lost, what a pity. I would love to have certificates on that subject.
Iam a therapist .Dave, you have sent to me what I NEED TO HEAR .All you sent to me is like a treasure closed in a box(folder)called Dvid oliver.Iam not licensed to use such knowledge in psychotherapy but Iam going to give agoldish chance of documenting these theories.Ihave hunderds of clients who are waiting to train them in supportive courses on bipolar or personality disorder. Elham
To Debbie Miller
I fully empathise with you I have the same problem but I am still with my partner. Were approaching our third year. At the start we both threatened to break up but over time I am beginning to learn to cope. I still to this stay when feeling low wonder what is true and not but I realised it’s no good freeting. I know they hate changes and brings on episodes so of course I went to college and brought on an episode. He learnt to cope with it and now I get the breaks by being at college and can now cope even better and YES with his support despite his cycling changes.He is aware of his problem and yes self medicate (drives me bonkers with it) but I know I can only do so much. Don’t take it personal just think ok its a mad moment give it time.
I’m thank ful that someone else has the same problem and that I am not alone as I thought
Victoria
I just wanted to let you know, I read your emails and I ordered your program. My life has been hell for the last year. My son who is now 18, all of a sudden does not think he is bipolar, along with my ex-inlaws who thinks that HE JUST HAS AN ANGER PROBLEM. Has basiclly distroyed everything that I had in order, from getting him on SSI and getting him help with his schooling. Well, in long run, he was living with me but when I asked him to clean his room he deceided that he did not need to live with me anymore, because I MADE HE DO THINGS. Medication and therpy works wonders. But how do you deal with ex-family that thinks that there is nothing wrong and blaims me for all of his problems. I am now a bad mother that has never done nothing when in fact I have lost over 20000.00 in one year taking care of him. My house is distroyed, from holes in the walls to doors being busted. I am too in therphy to learn to deal with just dealing. But, as a mother it is real hard to just say everything will be ok when I have no control over him anymore. With him being 18 I have no authority to anything. with out having him commited. well, according to the laws here in AL, he must harm himself or someone before I can even do that. I feel as if my hand are tied. With out my family and my boyfreind that all stand beside me I really dont’ know where I would be today. I can’t help but just wonder when the day is coming that I have lost my son to drugs or even the worse of him taking his own life. dealing with people who thinks that this is a made up illness and those people who don’t understand that he has a mind of a 10 year old but the features of a man is really difficult. I am just trying to take one day at a time and pray for the best. but you can not make someone learn or research this disorder when they just don’t believe in it.
Thanks Dave for all the info. You have helped me tremendously. And what a gift that you post it all out there for free, while asking for payment that you are certainly due. Yet those of us with no money will take whatever we can for free, sorry but, thats how we are. I feel like i could write a book myself, but there is so much out there who would want to hear it. Yet you put out there exactly what people need to hear….for once im glad to hear the info minus all the heartache (which is understood). You get to the nitty gritty of what to DO about it. No sense crying in your beer. The biggest obstacle is money. Before my daughter turned 18 she was covered on my insurance. Not being able to attend school, she came off the insurance. But that dosent mean the problems go away. It has been hell trying to get services for free. She has a little girl now and its still hell but we keep working on it. Money would help for respite care, babysitters, transportation. Yes i am one of those gone broke and unhealthy for the sake of my family. Sad to see that in your letters. BUT at least i know im not alone. Thank you, is all i can offer right now. And i will pray that your goodness spreads all over the world. We need people like you!
Also i want to add that i too believe that theres something to that about the vaccinations. Especially now that autism is so rampant. Funny they have added on all new immunizations prior to entering school. How can the govt FORCE us to put these substances into our children, while telling us what we cannot eat while pregnant or give them to eat as babies. It would be fine for them to suggest the vaccination routine, but NOT to mandate. We do have a choice, at least i thought we did. What can we do about this?
Hey David, don’t you be concerned about how others receive your responses, advice, etc. you are not responsible for that! You are only responsible for the information that you are putting out to the masses. so take that unnecessary load off of your shouldersand keep up the good work. the people who need to know this information are the ones who will accept it and adhere to it in their own way and thier own time. You are not responsible for that either! okay? When I can afford to buy your course i will and you are not responsible for that either! Lol! Sincerely, Dee Johnson
Dave, While I appreciate your desire to help me i ask that you remove my name from your mailing list I have three small children and the temptation to buy up all you have to say is too much when they need food first and foremost. Thank you for your concern but please remove me from your list
Becky
Hi dave thank you so much for all your tips here.I find them to really help me along with all that is in place with drs, support, Voc rehab,and peers.Keep it up!