Dear Dave,
In regard to the article of the man who stomped the cats, First let me say that it is a shame that innocent animals are dead.
Secondly, certainly there seem to be several points of view concerning the issue of the man’s homelessness and what may be keeping him homeless, ie., maybe his mental illness.
Than there are the issues of the crimes relating to the cruelty to those animals and/or humans. The mitigating factors do exist; however, those mitigating factors do not excuse the crime. From a personal point of view and having been watching someone close who has the same mindset, the issue, I believe stems from some anger that the man has inside of himself. As in my friend. He can’t get rid of what’s inside so he takes it out on other people, etc. It must be a close day to day monitoring that people with that particular illness need. It could be several things in one that make up the explosive state that the man goes into. I don’t all together believe that it is just a chemical imbalance.
On the up-close and personal front, trust me, therapy is needed daily to get the people with that severity an illness through each day. I believe that a one-hour counseling session should be ordered within the middle of the day for that type of an illness. Whether it be by phone at fifteen minute intervals, so that the person who is ill can check in from the outside to state what feelings that they are having during their day. It should be ordered since during the day, they have such racing thoughts that the minute something is triggered in their mind, instead of violence, that phone call may just help the person realize where he/she is here and now, and the person could explain to the therapist by phone what they are feeling, what is angering them for the moment, how their day is going etc. It could be done three times per day for fifteen minutes by phone. It just may eliminate some of the attacks that these people commit to others. That is the only way I get my fiance’ (who now wants to be on his own) through. I do the checking. It doesn’t always work, but if I didn’t do it, he’d be away for a long time.
From what I have personally seen, that type of mental illness can cause a person to resent others because they feel that they cannot stand on their own. They as well as most people that are grown, need to feel some type of independence. They realize and feel bad that they cannot exist totally on their own. They see their shortcomming and it frustrates them. Understandibly, so the difference lies within the fine lines of letting them feel as if they are independent, and giving them independence yet where the criminal aspect comes in; make part of their sentence be daily communication. They need it anyway. It only helps them as well as what could be future victims.
It would also take away the need for placement which costs a lot. I believe that some jailtime is necessary, correct, but the mentally ill are more prone to being hurt in jail than anything else. Why compound what probably made them that way in the first place? Past hurting, etc. that was never properly treated or handled. If someone is abused in childhood in anyway, I believe that the mind can automatically help the abused person escape the situation that they are in. In order to escape, the person can only escape through the mind which given this escape over and over through a number of years, the mind develops and the chemicals develope in certain ways from others who do not suffer such abuse. Daily ordered phone visits, coupled with regular outpatient therapy that is ordered, home visitations, etc. might work. I am not a doctor or a psychiatrist or a psychologist. It is just my personal view from seeing it close by me everyday, while having to get that person through a normal day.

I adotped a 2 1/2 year old girl (who is now 7). She has been diagnosed with Bi-Polar, ADHD, LD, ODD, Sensory Integration Dysfunction, and was sexually molested. She is in an Emotionally Impaired classroom and is doing fairly well. We have our cycles. I have found a book that has answered a lot of questions. The title is “Kids in the Syndrome Mix of ADHD, LD, Asperger’s, Tourette’s, Bipolar, and More!” The author is Martin L. Kutscher, M.D. There is also a lot of further reading material listed in the back of the book. Hope that can help some folks with the daily chore of taking care of our loved ones.

After 10 years of being married to a man with bipolar, having a mother-in-law with bipolar (both undiagnosed until just recetly) and many, many costly mistakes, I have made a few conclusions. Allowing a person with bipolar to single-handedly open and run a retail facility is finicial suicide. They can be excellent at many aspects of the business, probably not the money part. The constant manipulation and half truths are not personal attacks, but have to be put in a checks and balance. You must ask VERY specific questions clearly. You think your $31,000 was a big number? Try over $125,000 plus $60,000 cash startup money which we got from a retirement fund of 11 years as a full-time police officer. The business started 5 years ago, closed its doors in bankruptcy 2 years ago, and it has been job hopping since. I am a professional pilot and must use my days off to micromanage his work dilemas. He has been fired twice, quit four jobs, and I have done resumes over Christmas for the past three years.

As far as my mother-in-law, she walked in and out of our lives for the first eight years of marriage. Finally, with the blessing of my husband, I wrote her a factual but firm note forbidding her to see, speak, or have any contact with us and more importantly, our two beautiful girls, which she adored, for 1 year. Viscious? Absolutely not. Affective? Perfectly. I could take no more of the manipulation, again, not 100% intentional on her part and I refused to fight. She threatened legal action, but we had done our homework. She had no rights as long as we were still married. That was about 3 years ago and for the last 1.5 years we have had a very open, calm relationship. Does she still pull her crap on others? Yep. I am not claiming to have “fixed” her, just give her rules and consequences. She actually seem sto like them. We have also had very deep conversations about my empathy for her. She has been through more than a person should. Anyhow, if you have a bipolar mother-in-law, I hope you have the same support from your husband that I had from mine. If you are married to a bipolar husband, hang in there. I have found Mr. Oliver’s emails very encouraging over the past 3 weeks. My husband still can grate on my every nerve from time to time, but we love each other and it is never intentional (can you tell I have to remind myself of this quite often???) Good luck!