I agree with Kevin39. I would like to help people to not suffer as much as I’ve suffered, and I’m not even close to some of those you’ve mentioned. I suppose joining a support group and offering what we’ve learned might be the best way. That and offering insight on this blog. I’m still learning about b/p myself and sometimes I’m scared to death (I think that might be part of being b/p). There are so many issues and so little time. I do have trouble formulating exact problems when I visit my psyc. There are tons of issues and I don’t know how to deal with myself anymore. I’m a different person and I don’t know me yet. How does one actually be concise with their questions when there are so many of them. Any suggestions?

Hi Dave,
I’ve been with you for over a year now with my son’s problems but have had my head in the sand. He’s going into a manic phase again and I’m back to asking the questions. You’re right. I’m in an area with no support, psych’s, dr.’s etc. so when I find someone I try to be very specific. Thank you, and I’m getting my head out of the sand again. B

Dave, Wow thats alot of calls, this is something. I personnally will feel like I was stampeded by bulls, you dont have to take on all these peoples problems you have information people can learn but come on. To call you a say I need help, there is only so much you can do. Change your #, Because it is damed if you do or dont. What happens when something happens and you are mentioned as coaching this person, there are professionals that deal w really sick people. Watch yourself, The circle is round on layer which is the awareness the other is the bounderies, and the small one in the inner is you. Please remember I see these people getting real close to you. so, gat awarness back in ther and deliver what you need to. afterall its not a hotline!!! So long, Laura

My main problem my husbands family takes him in during his mania episodes they dont believe in the bipolar instead he is too stressed over life his responsibilities, being married he needs a break to spend and party etc they coddle him and it sets us back 10 yrs everytime. What do I do with that???? Doreen

Hi Dave: I am very new to all of this. My husband was diagnosed just 2 weeks ago with bipolar disorder (however, not manic). Having a diagnosis is actually a relief; knowing the “whats” and “whys” of his life/personality is half the battle as far as I am concerned. I have already investigated a lot into the causes, symptoms, and treatments; and I believe we are already headed in the right direction. We had already been dealing with our credit/financial issues before the diagnosis, as well as previous drug and alcohol abuse. It has been a very lonely ride for me, but I feel there is hope now for us to live a fairly normal life once his entire treatment is determined and followed. Needless to say it won’t be easy or forever, but it will definitely be an improvement from the past years. I feel badly for him that it took so long for him to get the diagnosis and treatment he needed -it all began for him when he was 8 and he is now turning 51. There was NO parently support; in fact they were a lot of the trigger mechanism for his disorder. I enjoy reading your messages and always find something relevant for ME in them. Now I want to find a local support group (if one exists) so I won’t feel so alone.
Pam

I will try not to be rambler. Good luck with the rest of the messages.

Hi Dave and fellow readers
-Did you know you really REALLY rambled an awful lot in today’s email >G< Anyhow, if I might add my two cents worth.. my primary doc's clinic, as many are doing, is going to total computer use and they seem to forget who we are in the process. After a month of having my meds really mixed up (blood pressure, muscle relaxant, narcotic for degenerative disc disease), i was steaming. My method is to ask "ok, what's the underlying problem here". That got me off wanting to chew my doctor up and spit her off and realize the computer thing. So, I made an appointment at each place I have medical records; copied the important stuff and made (1) a primary problem list, ie (a) medicated, but uncontrolled blood pressure (b) degenerative disk disease; etc. (2) A list of my current medications including the "prn" ones like inhaler for asthma that occurs once every two years (3) took time and 5 years of pharmacy records to separate out how long i'd been taking drugs, how many, etc. (4) A procedures list, including minor surgeries, trip to ER for dislocated finger. And then included clinic notes that verified things like "i doubt she'll ever work full time with the arthrhitis now in both knees and hips"; "node on aorda"... and why have we not talked about that one ?? Then you have probably 10 pages of your entire medical history (or the important stuff of the past 10 years or so and earlier if onset of something was earlier); documented with a clinic record. Make 5-6 copies, file under “Current Medical Records” and update at the end of each year; you can hand it off to new providers, EMTs, ERS, etc and they’ve got a concise history of where you are. Makes life much easier, especially if you have multiple medical issues and the doc is forced by HMO, Medicare, etc to spend no more than 10-15 minutes with you.

Dave, i understand now how important a docter’s time is . i just want to make sure that my only son is being treated well. i have not spoken to his docter yet, i live in calif and my son is in arz. we talk by phone. thank-you for reminding me of thelimited time that everyone that is taking care of my son has. my son is bi-polar since the age of 14yrs he is now 27yrs.it is good to know that there is some one who understands about this heartbreaking diease.

Hi Dave,
This is off topic but I have a question for you.

You have at least two websites, one dealing with bi-polar and one dealing with borderline personality disorder.

On both, in your bio, you write the same letter about your mother, only you change the words bi-polar and borderline personality disorder, depending on the site.

So which is it? If, in fact, it is both, why not at least put a link to the other site on each site, or combine them.

http://www.borderlinecentral.com/aboutme.shtml

http://www.bipolarcentral.com/aboutme.asp

In my humble opinion, I think you are being disengenous.

You can’t choose your parents. You can choose who you will go out on dates with, marry and have children with. If you can’t cope with bipolar moods, drinking or drugs then it would make sense to choose another to be “in love” with instead of complaining about various things that are “off” with a “loved one” and maybe that “one” would prefer someone less judgemental to love them or even wait until that person shows up in their life to have a relationship. My dad was always complaining about my mom (suspect that mom was bipolar or possible schizophrenic) when he could have opted to stay single until someone compatible got interested in him! He made me mad saying I was “just like my mom” whenever he got angry at me. Anyways, would make life easier if you either love somebody or leave them. I’ve had to leave numerous times to keep from getting over stressed by difficult people even though still felt I loved them. At least take a break instead rag to death those you supposedly love…

hello! I am new to this whole thing so I am still a little suspecious of it all… how do i know your course books are real and not a fraud? i don’t wanna waste $200… But I am really interested in all this and hope this program can help me.

Dear Dave,
I’ve never used Google, nor a Blogger, I don’t even know what these truly are, but I signed in anyway. I hope you get my message and respond soon.

As for time, Honey we all have too much to do and not enough time to do it in. What matters is we 100% at minimum to our causes our positions of aid and no one can touch that or take that away from you.

I agree on only telling the specifics, what I call, “symptoms” only. I do this with my doctor before I go and see him. I say M.E. only tell him what resulted and not how you got there. My only fear is that doctors truely don’t know enough about this disease and other like it and I almost would like them to be forced to learn more, and listen more to understand more fully.

Example, I told my doctor about a severe attack I had recently. Several triggers turned me into a constant state of panic. A final trigger left me in a “black out state” only to wake the next morning remembering very little about that night.

I need to know if other have this happen, too.

I also need to know why my doctor says he understands that I am Manic/Bi-Polar and have extreme panic attacks without treatment, and so he puts me on those treatments (Lexapro, Depakote, and Clonazapam/ and now just on Serequel since this last attack. Problem is…. I am prescribed medication for this disease, but my doctor will not put in my file what I am being treated for. In other words, he’s got some problem with putting it in my charts and in words what my diagnosis is and he evades saying anything that might lead to a diagnosis. Why?

Most important, please let me know what you know and other instances of this form of extreme panic/mania.

Sincerely,

M.E.

Hi Dave

I support you on your choice for to the point messages/letters/e-mail etc.

I learned that the hard way myself but have now found that if i just put a question out there with no leed up than the person /persons hearing the question are confused and ask me a buch of questions to figure out what the heck i’m talking about?

Is there a fine line thing here? I’m not so good at tight rope walking, so fill me in. How much is too much and how little is too little?

mel

David..Do you realize that you ramble too? Your messages are very long. Just wondering if you could have bipolar as well. These poeple are calling you because you have put youself “out there” as a person who cares and can help. Then you are complaining about their phone messages? Not trying to be hateful, but I wonder if you realize how you ramble in your messages.

Dear Dave,

How many people are you helping now? If it’s as huge a number as you say, could you multiply your help by having a television or radio talk show? Would you consider it? It could multiply your effectiveness. Bi polar illness and its variants must be more widespread than anyone could heretofore imagined. If you are afraid of being criticized or sued for offering your common sense advice based on personal experience, you could have guest professionals to lend “credibility”–though I think your information makes their professional advice accessible in a way not offered before. Please think about this before your burn out. C

Dave, w. has been to a psychiatrist and is taking one med as ordered. He still believes he has ADD and wants to take a stimulant which the Psychiatrist won’t order. He is going to go to his PCP to try to get the stimulant due to lack of focus. How can I marry someone who won’t take the psychiatrist’s advice?