Hi,
What’s going on?
Hey, today I want to tell you about a funny story that happened to me the other day. It will bring to your attention a really humorous way of looking at a bipolar disorder success strategy.
The other day, I was working on a whole lot of things. I mean working really hard. Nothing to do with anything about mental health, just with my consulting business.
I have a friend of mine that I work with in one of my businesses. Normally we talk every day first thing in the morning.
That morning I wasn’t around and talking to him because I had to leave early and my cell phone was down.
As the day fast forwarded, it became like 4:00pm then 4:30. I was still working at like 5:00pm or so, so I headed to the good old gym.
I was there for a while because I wound up working out for 45 minutes doing 30 minutes of cardio and then 1 hour of talking afterwards.
When I got home, here is what I saw:
text message after text message that said:
NOTE each line is a DIFFERENT message.
“Are U there?”
“Are U there?”
“Are U there?”
“There?”
“There?”
“Why U ducking me today?”
voice messages that said:
NOTE each line is a DIFFERENT voice message.
“Hey, call me back.”
“Hey, you there?”
“Call me back?”
“Why you ducking me?”
“Hey, why you ducking me?”
emails that said:
NOTE each line is a DIFFERENT email.
“There?”
“There?”
“There?”
“Why you ducking me today?”
I know you think this is crazy. It really, really, is. But it’s funny.
As soon as I saw 25 different messages, guess what I did?
Take a guess then scroll down…..
NO CHEATING! Guess then scroll….
I called him back immediately so I didn’t have any more messages.
It went like this, “Hey, what’s up? I got all your messages?”
He said, “Why you ducking me today?”
Then he talked about what he had to. It was important. Not life or death but important.
I told another friend of mine about this, and she said that he is out of his mind. He actually isn’t and is super smart. But he is determined. When he needs something he will call, email, IM, visit, and do whatever it takes. Period.
He won’t leave one message, it will be TONS of them. He is not even phased if he fills up your voicemails!
What’s this have to do with bipolar disorder?
A TON. I call this the “Filler up” or “Are you There?” strategy.
With bipolar disorder, many times you need to get stuff done fast. Or you need answers quick. You don’t need them in a couple of years. You don’tneed it in 2028. You don’t need it at the other person’s leisure. You need it now.
What is it? Let me give you some examples:
-Medication
-Information on medication
-New medication
-A refill of medication
-Doctor to see yourself or your loved one
-Therapist to see yourself or your loved one
-Information from social security if you are on disability
-etc.
If you are support a child or teen, the list of things you need is long and deep and nowhere are people slower than when you are dealing with a child or teen with bipolar disorder.
Why? Because you are dealing with school systems who 98% of the time are super slow, don’t really care and like giving you a hard time. There are so many examples it’s hard to list them all here.
There is this interesting phenomenon when it comes to mental health.
Even though it’s life or death many times (your loved one could die or you could die when people are slow to get you information), people take their time. They are not motivated.
In my courses/systems below:
SUPPORTING AN ADULT WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarsupporter.com/report11
SUPPORTING A CHILD/TEEN WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarparenting.com
HAVE BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
I talk about this at length. I give you lists of things you have to watch out for. Information you need to know.
If you are reading this and thinking, “Oh Dave, what’s the big deal, what could be so urgent, you are probably in trouble.”
In the success interviews in my courses/systems above I go through a whole lot of things you have to watch out for.
The biggest thing you can learn from me, especially from the “are you there strategy” is you have to push. You can’t wait around. One phone call will not do it all. People will not move fast in mental health especially when you are dealing with bipolar disorder.
You may think they will because they are supposed To or it’s the “right” thing to do. But let me warn you, it doesn’t work this way. Be warned today.
Remember my friend and how he operates. He will call/text/email/visit and repeat over and over and over again. YES he is annoying but he isn’t running for office so to speak. He gets results. He gets things done when 99% of others fail.
In the last month, he was able to make a huge Accomplishment in one of my businesses because he pushed, and pushed and pushed and pushed.
Many times in mental health, with bipolar disorder you wonder, “should I push harder?” In most cases, I always say yes.
To help my mom, I had to push hard. Demand action. Demand better treatment. Demand responses. Demand that people focus on my mom. I had to call and fill up people’s voicemails.
NOTE-
“Filler up” is when you leave so many voicemails that you are the focus when the person check’s the voicemail. Also, when you leave lots of voicemails, you can Potentially eliminate anyone else’s ability to leave voicemails. Some think this is wrong but many people have done this and endorse it. When you need action,you have to get extreme sometimes.
I was just thinking. People reading this probably think I am out of my mind for even posting this message.
Seriously, this is an important concept to grasp. If you understand what I am saying and get it, great. If not reread this and be warned the “system” doesn’t respond fast and if you don’t use a strategy like this, you’re going to have a hard time probably.
Hey I just looked at the clock and have to run.
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David Oliver is the author of the shocking guide “Bipolar Disorder—The REAL Silent Killer.” Click Here to get FREE Information sent via email on how and why bipolar disorder kills.
Post comments to this here
Hi David: I have a brother that does the same thing to me with Yahoo Instant Messenger. He knows that I can’t have it running and do anything else because I am stuck with slow dial-up and when I do have messenger going I am invisible because I typical don’t have time to talk anyone other than my brother and I have an average of 8 “Are you there, Sis” separate messages. Now on to the time my daughter was still in school. It is hard to find the drugs to treat a child with Bi-polar because so many of the standards are not safe for them to take. She had a hard time sleeping all the time and as a result missed a lot school. This resulted in me going to the school a lot to discuss her problems. I threatened the assistant vice-principal on a lot of occasions that he better not put anything about bi-polar next to her name because they had students working in the office and she was having such a hard time with the other kids because it was apparent that she was “different” and then each and every time I had a session with this idiot (who has since been fired, thank God) and explain Bi-polar Disorder to him and why Katy was the way she was. You would think that after 20 conferences or so he would have had it down pat. But not this idiot. So at that time I was living with a guy that was about 6’2″ and weighed about 250# (he is deceased now) scheduled a conference with the jackass and the principal of the school and made it plain to them that my daughter had problems she couldn’t manage. To make a long story short, my boyfriend passed away soon after that and I didn’t have any more problems until the next school year and all the same happened, except he reported my daughter to the proper authorities and she was put on probation and all the usual delinquent crap. The irony is that was she was nearly 16 y/o and about to drop out of school and so this bast*** made sure she would go to school beyond the time she didn’t have to anymore. She did drop out and went to do her GED tests, without studying, took them all in one session and aced them all!
HI! This is my first post for here! Anyway…it is so true that ‘ you have to
push. You can’t wait around.’ I was diagnosed with bi-polar in 2001 ( I think). Anway….to make this short…i have done a lot of moving and traveling. So keeping a regular doctor is very difficult. Keeping meds refilled…sometimes impossible! I have had to become intune with my body and I know when I have to be away from people (when I can’t get my meds).
This time…I have been off since January but this past week knew I could not go any longer…and will not ever put myself in that place again! But anyway… back to why I commented on ‘Are you There?’ I live in a foreign country in the Middle East so getting to a doctor who is qualified and able to get the right meds is really hard to do. I was first diagnosed when working here before and the government psychiatric doctor actually only put me on an antidepressent..two kinds!!! After I moved to Hawaii, they put me on Depakote and my bi-polar became easier to live with, I read all I can about it and know I have to be on a schedule to keep stable.
But here I go and run out…with no doctor to rely on. My friend and I finally went to this place where it said psychiatry and there was a pharmacy next door. When asked if I could get in to see the doctor…I’m told it will take 3 weeks! I was almost in tears…knowing I was in an episode and it was only getting worse!! My friend said….call if you have a cancellation.
I was driving home….. and got a call from the receptionist…. someone had cancelled that evening! What a miracle!! It was one time that I could say they listened to me!!! NOt an easy thing here where you could wait for 6 months for a root canal!
Anyway….yeah you have to knock down some doors to get what you need!! But it happens!! Thankfully I didn’t have to wait…. and even after just 2 days on meds I feel myself calming down. It will take months to get where I know I can be…but I’m on my way!
David,
Thanks for the reminder to be persistant when needing Dr’s services, meds ect. I’d like to ad that it’s also necessary when you finally do get in to see the DR., med provider ect to stay persistant and insist on good treatment! I have an appointment today with my med provider and must somehow get across the fact that I need to have my meds adjusted due to some recent mood swings.
Thanks for all your work and blogs. This is one of the very few places that bipolar sufferers can go and feel understood!