==>>Help with ALL aspects of bipolar disorder<<==
Check out all my resources, programs and information
for all aspects of bipolar disorder by visiting:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/catalog.asp
Hey,
How’s it going? I have to take off pretty quick here
because I have to go to train.
As a side note, someone once asked how I think of topics
to write about each day. I have a lot of stuff to choose
from. I have over 100,000 on my list, it grows up to 800
people a day, I have 8 people who work for me with a mental
illness, my mom has bipolar disorder, I have friends
with it, so coming up with new things to write about
is pretty easy.
But getting up each morning and spending 1 hour writing
and thinking about it can be hard. Especially when
you are tired 🙂
Yesterday I was checking out my bipolar
blog yesterday at www.bipolarcentral.com/supporterblog
and came across some interesting posts.
Here’s one.
Anita said…
I have a question for Mr. Oliver that doesn’t
really pertain to the news. I just didn’t know
how else to contact you. I’m Bipolar and I wonder
why I do what I do. I shut everybody out. I don’t
let ANYBODY know what’s going on except my Dr. even
when I’m manic – unless I can’t help it. Sure-
I yell a lot at my kids, and everybody knows I’m moody,
but I don’t want anybody to know I’m depressed,
suicidal, paranoid, manic or whatever. Why do I
do that? Is that normal behavior?
And then I got another one that said.
misty said…
My mother is bipolar. I am at the end of my rope.
She keeps getting worse and worse. She has been
calling me latly leaving nasty messages. I don’t
know what to do. I just got married. We went to
Hawaii on our own just so she would not mess our
day up. Well, now she is giving us a reseption.
She claims all i do is complain about everything.
So not true. I am in the middle of starting my
new career.I have been going on interviews. i am a
stylist so I take clients at home right now. so I
am super busy. She calls me 10 times a day. If I
do not answer she getsreally bad and hateful. I
can’t take it. I don’t know what to do. Please help!
I was reading these posts and thinking about
something that I learned when I was at school. I
have actually used it a lot over the years.
It’s called Occam’s Razor.
Wikipedia says this of Occam’s Razor…
Occam’s razor (sometimes spelled Ockham’s razor)
is a principle attributed to the 14th-century
English logician and Franciscan friar William of Ockham.
[The principle] often paraphrased as “All things
being equal, the simplest solution tends to be
the right one.”
Most of the time, I find that when trying
to help someone with bipolar disorder, indeed
the simplest solution is the one that generally
works.
If we look at the two posts, the simplest
solution that runs through for both people
is–the need to a correct treatment plan.
The first person obviously is struggling
and needs to immediately go to the doctor
and express all the things posted in my blog
or have the help of someone who is around
and acting as bipolar supporter do it for
them or help them.
As for the second person, the mother
needs proper treatment. This might sound
simple but it’s the truth. I find many
people waste so much time thinking of
what to do when the #1 focus has to be
getting either yourself (if you aren’t
stable ) or someone who
is not stable with bipolar disorder into
the right treatment plan.
Many times, people are looking for very complex
strategies on how to “handle” someone with
bipolar disorder that is not stable or how to
handle severe mood swings. The answer is generally
simple–it’s about the right treatment plan.
The first step is to find a good doctor. The good
doctor works to make a good treatment plan. After
that, everything else starts to fall into place.
Virtually all the success stories in all my
courses/systems below all started with getting
a good doctor and that person created a good
treatment plan.
SUPPORTING AN ADULT WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarsupporter.com/report11
SUPPORTING A CHILD/TEEN WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarparenting.com
HAVE BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.survivebipolar.net
With bipolar disorder, don’t fall prey to
looking for super complex answers or strategies.
Remember the Occam’s Razor philosophy.
For many that I have talked to with bipolar
disorder who have struggled. By them simply
going to the doctor once a month, changed their
entire life. All they really needed to do is
show up with consistency.
If they would have done this from the time they
were first diagnosed, they would have not wasted
years and years of their lives.
Well I have to take off for the day. Have a great
day and catch you tomorrow.
Your Friend,
Dave
P.S. Don’t forget to take a look through the
different programs I’ve put together… each one is designed
to help you with a different area of bipolar disorder whether
you have it or you are supporting someone with it.
You can see them all and get the details by visiting:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/catalog.asp
P.P.S. Check out my F.ree blog with copies of emails
that I have sent in the past and lots of great
information for you:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/supporterblog/
P.P.P.S Check out my F.ree podcast. Hear me give
mini seminars designed to teach you information
you can’t learn anywhere else.
http://bipolarcentral.libsyn.com
I was diagnosed finally with bipolar disorder earlier this year. It really makes so much of my feelings more understandable. I have been seeing the psychiatrist for 2 years and being treated for depression. Then I talked more in depth and she agreed with the bipolar (which runs in my family). My wife doesn’t really understand, so I do feel really alone so much of the time. I do wind up talking to my sister long distance at times. Got any ideas?
To Keith: I found a wonderful site that offers over 500 support communities to sign up for. I’ve been a member for 3 weeks, have joined a BPD community and a Addiction community and now have 8 friends, my age from the UK to US, we chat, ehug, support and get advise from people and updated research, etc. There is even a link back to here. dailystrenght.org is the site, I STRONGLY RECOMMEND IT, it has boosted my spirits, ten-fold.
Simple solutions is what the BPD community needs, so this concept is great, and I have had the same sort of experience, but it has been one thing at a time. Dr, Meds, plan, etc. The best place for me to start was the APH program at a local hospital. Adult Partial Hospitalization Program is a day-treatment program for mental illness instability issues, groups, discussion lectures, relaxation therapy, fun therapy, inter-action practice, the list goes on. All in one spot, I got support and direction for solutions to my immediate issues. They literally took me by the hand and taught me how to start living again. I went 5 days a week, 6 hours a day, got fed, made some friends – for 3 weeks, and then it was time to fly on my own. I learned so much from that and since.
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My mother (deceased) was bipolar (or at least, negatively unpredictable). While a simple solution would have been to get her into treatment, legally, I had no legal rights to do so. In addition, my mother accepted advice from no one, as marked by a trail of lawsuits that she started on her own behalf, right up to her death (she sued hospitals, family members, and caretakers as she slipped away – there’s always a lawyer who’ll accept a fee, no matter who pays it) (she lost all, by the way).
I’d be happy to go into detail, but I believe that if you are not worried about the well-being of children or dependents still in the care of such a person is to divorce that person, walk away, and plan for the future. You are not required to keep that person in your life.
David’s earlier advice about why using the word “why” is powerless when trying to figure out a situation like this is correct. Don’t ask yourself “why is this happening.” Instead, move on. While I wish your life with your loved one had been better, try to remember the nuggets of good in the relationship, ignore the bad issues, and just move on, free and clear. The only thing time gives any of us is our the future, so use that future well.
Now, if you are concerned about siblings and others in the family, you will need to make sacrifices of time and probably money. Buy and study every document David Oliver has to offer, then see if you can partner with people who are within your loved one’s legal sphere. Remember, in the USA, once someone is 18, that person is emancipated. Unless you can prove that that person is involved in criminal activity or is physically hurting others, there is no outside governmental power to help you resolve the situation. Whatever happens is up to you, your ability to partner with legally-responsible insiders, and your own wits. The truth is, parents have no rights over their emancipated children and children never have any rights over parents or siblings.
Above all, do not accept a “power of attorney” if you are called in to help such a person. You need a “legal guardianship” to actually have some clout. All a power of attorney provides is the right to sign documents. If your loved one has a negative history, that person can easily turn around and sue you for perceived or imagined mismanagement. A power of attorney is based on trust and if there is no trust, there is no power.
In summary, either divorce your loved one and walk away if others under that person’s one’s care are not physically threatened, or study materials to pinpoint actions you can take to protect the people involved in the situation. If you elect to protect people, be prepared to offer a home to siblings and/or provide money so that when they are of age, they can move, with the knowledge that they have your support. Always listen to your siblings – if there are any signs of battery or sexual abuse, you must take action.
I’d be happy to go into detail, but I believe that if you are not worried about the well-being of children or dependentants still in the care of such a person is to divorce that person, walk away, and plan for the future. D
If you have mood swings and you know it, you are on the road to recovery.
Follow everything David Oliver has to say, of course. I also recommend keeping a diary – maybe several. Keep what you write short and to the point. (Let your thoughts ramble, but not your writing.) Avoid complaining. Focus on your desires.
Enlist helpers to review your diary and have them part of a plan to help keep you on track.
Last, make sure you incorporate plenty of aerobic activity in your life. Get the oxygen flowing! Dance! Exercise (do the twist if you can’t run). Listen to upbeat, fast music as much as possible. Eat protein (many people have mood swings because they only eat donuts and bread).
Keep a diary about the future. Outline what you want to have happen next. Call it your life’s business plan.
the need to a correct treatment plan.
Boy that sounds so simple!
What do you do with the person with the bi-polar disorder who:
1. lacks insight about how their bi-polar is affecting them and those around them?
2. Is non-compliant about taking medication?
Forgive me for seeming so negative.
I am a tired out mother of a 26 year old son who is in the midst of an episode that swings from mania to paranoia to depression. Who has the problems listed above.
We have moved him out of our house to a nearby city that has excellent mental health resourses, now the question is will he avail himself of these services.
We are all on a huge learning curve when it comes to this bi-polar disorder.
Any tips?
Pat
Pat, I would recommend the bipolar supporter’s course. I haven’t seen it myself as my fiance is on a good treatment plan (so far) and takes his meds and goes to all of his doctor appointments without any assistance from me. In the course there are strategies for the things that you are asking about – how to get your son to take his meds, etc. I’ve been on this list for almost a year and Mr. Oliver knows his stuff. Moreso than other lists about biPD. I think he may even let you return it if you don’t find it helpful. Good luck!
My name is Pamela and I am a victim of Bipolar Disease. I am 50 years old and was diagnosed five years ago. I am telling my story only to help Mother’s of Children whom may have signs or symtoms of this disabling illness. My Son was 26 years old, last year on May 13, when he took a hand gun and shot himself in his right temple dieing instantly. No one saw it coming. He was to be married the very next Saturday. Everything was booked and ready. I noticed Nick’s ups and downs, but never thought that my beautiful son could be suffering from the same illness as I. As I listened to his music downloads, looked at his pictures over and over it was so plain to see that he was suffering. If your child is depressed, please do not dismiss it, talk to them (often). My guilt haunts me every day. Sincerely, Pamela
well im jean and i have bi-polor and have had it now for 9 yrs and it has been very challenging for me to function in society everything that use to be easy is sometimes now harder then ever i live daily from all the medication that i take for the bi-polor and my health has went down hill health wise i never thought id have so much wrong with me but i guess it happenes to the best of use. im a mother of 3 kids boy 14 and boy 7 and girl 10 and let me say it is very hard to deal with my kids we have screeming battles all the time its as if we know no other way to communicate. and we are growing more distint and i think i failed as a mother and that the way my kids are is my fault.i have lost jobs left partners and my kids before i even turned to crack and cocaine and it seem to help for a while so i thought but in fact it was all still there i was just numbing myself not to feel the world around me and now i have almost 4 yrs of recovery off the drugs and i read any imformation i can find to help me cope with my life.i dont talk to hardly anyone about how im feeling and it gets to explosion time and i loose my head and go crazy and finally it will go away and im like well what just happened.ok well dont want this to long but wanted you to know my storey and say ty for taking the time to write about what you know and experienced.
I am a Kaiser patient. They really don’t give you a choice of who you want to see, and if you do quit your doctor because you are unhappy,it can take months to get reassigned.I like my current doctor, but she only wants to see me every three months.I am taking Risperdal,lithium,clonopin, and bupropion. I am not stabilized by any means.What can I do to be seen more often??
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Alas! All I read here is PAIN, pure and simple. I am bipolar, and have been for 39 years. My first episode occurred when I was 20, so I have been through the ebbs and flows of this disorder for two-thirds of my life.
I agree with Dave that you DO need a treatment plan. If it weren’t for the local Community Mental Health program here where I live, I feel I would be hospitalized with no hope of recovery. In fact, if I AM hospitalized the next time – either for mania or depression – it will be the LAST time, and I will NEVER get out.
I am stabilized on Zyprexa, Depakote, Valium, and PaxilCR. I never miss taking my meds – THIS IS IMPORTANT!!! Also, I see a psychotherapist twice a month for cognitive therapy, and a psychiatrist every three months, to regulate my meds and monitor my moods. I’m sorry, Mark, but three months seems to be the only regimen that insurance companies will cover for shrinks…
I feel for the woman who lost her son to suicide on the eve of his wedding. THAT is something that just tears you apart. I have NO supporters – aside from the CMH – so am winging this on my own. I rely on my Case Manager and therapist to be alert to any dangerous signs of mood swings. I have NEVER been suicidal, but know MANY bipolars who are. Some numb themselves with marijuana and alcohol – if they would only stick to their “plans,” they wouldn’t need self-medication to help them -which it really doesn’t.
I’m doing very well, now, but am only one mood swing away from real psychosis. It IS true that the bipolar sufferer has NO insight into their illness when they are manic (I don’t know about depression, as I have only had one bout of clinical depression, and absolutely KNEW I was depressed). It is up to the supporter of a BP to recognize the “triggers” and get help for their loved one. I’m afraid when they are in a manic, they don’t recognize it, and would NOT seek help when they need it; mania is SO much FUN!!!
I know many bipolars enjoy hypomania; the euphoria, the good feelings, the heightened sense of awareness are AWESOME. But I have found when I’m on the brink of a manic episode, too many BAD things happen, that it is just not WORTH the “good feelings” to go there…
I’m afraid I have been rambling, but I wanted to get a few thoughts out there to my fellow bloggers in misery. I HAVE been there. May God bless you and keep you in His loving mercy, and may you seek help when you need it.
I’ve been diagnosed with bi-polar and major depression 3 years ago. How was I diagnosed? A trip to the mental hospital after a looooong fight with my huband, which I might add, ADDS to my problems. When we argue,he NEVER lets up. I know that there was something wrong with me a while before I was diagnosed. Mood swings was a big part of it. But let me tell you all. If you have NO support at home, like I do. My husband shrugs everything off. He dosen’t WANT to know. You’re left alone. It stinks not having anyone to talk to. I see a psych. every month for my meds. And she does ask how things are going at home. But what can you do or where can you go on a measly $530.00 a month in disability?? It sucks having to be somewhere where you don’t want to be.In a stressful inviorment. Don’t think I spelled that right, but you get the idea.
P.S Sorry. Meant to say HUSBAND. Not huband….