I read a poem the other day, and I thought it was really beautiful. Here it is:
Life is like a rose.
In order to partake of its beauty
You must also suffer the pain of
Now, that may be a good statement about life in general, but I’ll tell you what it has to do with
bipolar disorder. It was written by someone who has bipolar disorder herself — Michele, who works for me. So let’s talk about what she says, and how it does relate to bipolar disorder.
We’d all like our loved one’s bipolar disorder to go along without a hitch. We’d love it if they were medication complaint, stuck with their treatment plan, had no more episodes, always saw their doctors, therapists, etc., without complaining…
We’d love it if they would always take care of themselves (so we wouldn’t have to)…Stick to a good diet (and never cheat)…Exercise (and not get lazy)…And sleep right (never staying up too late to watch those late movies or TV shows).
We’d love it if we had a stress-free life as a supporter of a loved one with bipolar disorder. Yes, we’d love those things. But that’s not reality, is it? The reality is like what Michele wrote about
the rose. You have to take the bad with the good.
A rose is very beautiful. But it also has its thorns. Just like bipolar disorder. It has its good days.
But it also has its bad days too, doesn’t it?
What a beautiful life it would be if we didn’t have to deal with bipolar disorder…NOT TRUE!
We’d still have to deal with life itself. And, like the poem, which was NOT about bipolar disorder, by the way, it was about LIFE…No life is perfect.
You’d still have to deal with many of the same problems you’re having to deal with that you are
now with your loved one’s bipolar disorder. So what I’m trying to say is…Don’t feel sorry for yourself when times get bad, because they would get bad sometimes with or without having to deal with bipolar disorder in your life. That’s just life itself.
If you have communication problems with your loved one who has bipolar disorder, you would
probably have communication problems with them even if they didn’t have bipolar disorder.
If you have problems with expressing your thoughts and feelings, and/or you tend to “stuff” them now, you probably would anyway, and that would still be a problem.
If you feel distant from your loved one at times, you would probably feel distant from them even if they didn’t have bipolar disorder.
If you tend to get stressed and anxious, you would probably still get stressed and anxious whether your loved one had bipolar disorder or not.
If you are short-tempered and tend to get angry easily, it is probably not because of your loved one’s bipolar disorder – it just may be the way you are.
What I’m saying is that you can’t blame all your problems on your loved one’s bipolar disorder.
Some of your problems would still be there whether your loved one had bipolar disorder or not.
Learn from the Lesson of the Rose.
Well, I have to go!