Happy Mothers Day and 3 “whys” with bipolar disorder

David Oliver Uncategorized

=>PLEASE FORWARD TO FRIENDS, FAMILY AND LOVED ONES <= Hi, How’s it going? Happy Mothers Day if you are a mother. Much better day yesterday. I am going to write more about some of
the folks that I have dealt with recently
that are severely ill.

It’s unfortunate that a few people almost
ruin it for the entire group.

We have a much better system of dealing
with all the threats I face–blackmail,
death threats, attacks of various kinds,
etc.

Today I wanted to talk about several
whys and bipolar disorder.

Let’s look at a few.

1. Why people get off their medication.

My research finds that people get off their
medication for a combination of reasons.
Some feel they were bad but now they are
better or cured from bipolar disorder.

Some feel there is nothing wrong with them. Some
feel that medication is not making them any
better. Some have too many side effects.

If you have side effects, realize their
are lots of medication possibilities. Talk
to your doctor about your situation and he/she
can help find the right medication to reduce
or eliminate the side effects you can’t
tolerate.

If you get off your medication because you
think you are better and don’t need it,
you are wrong. Part of you being well is
medication. When you stop taking it, you take
away the very thing helping you be stable. Then
you go unstable and then can wind up doing and
saying all kinds of things that are terrible.
Remember there is no cure for bipolar disorder.

The kinds of things that 7 really bad people
said and did to me in the last week. People
who I have to call the police on. People who
are going to be in a whole bunch of trouble
with the law. People who have committed all kinds
of fraud and now have been found out.

If you don’t think you have any mental illness
at all and don’t think you need to take medication,
do yourself a favor and get a second and third
opinion before you self diagnose.

2. Why people don’t accept bipolar disorder.
I believe the reason is because it’s tough
to have bipolar disorder or a mental illness
in society.

People aren’t like, “hey you have bipolar,
wow that’s great. I want to hang out with
you and be your friend. Here’s a great job
as well.” It doesn’t work like that. There’s
tons of stigma in society which making acceptance
of a disorder that others frown down on hard
to do.

Also, it’s the kind of people I have dealt with
in the last week–people who are truly menaces
to society and cause all kinds of problems and destruction
that cause people to think negatively about those
with bipolar disorder.

I on the other hand have tons of great experience. When
I think of mental illness I think of a person being
smarter, more intelligent, more creative than people
without a mental illness. I have lots of people who
work for me who are high functioning and do great.
This is my experience. Other people have negative personal
experiences or read or see negative things about
those with a mental illness.

I will tell you, if someone heard 7 people I spoke
to last week that were just down right mean, they
would be worried about those with a mental illness.

This is why I urge those with a mental illness like
bipolar disorder and others to STAY ON their medications
and if they have any problems with their medications to
work with a great doctor to get the best one. The alternative
is to get off and then wind up doing absolutely insane things
and making it hard for the people in society that have
a mental illness that want people to think positively of
them.

3. Why do people say and do really mean things.
No one knows exactly but what is known is bipolar
disorder is a mood disorder. It alters the way
you think when you are not stable. So you can wind
up saying and doing things you normally would not.

Here’s some of what my mom has done when
she wasn’t stable:

-thrown a phone at me

-bought $1500 of groceries on a Monday
and thrown 80% of them away in same
day for months on end. Cost more than
$10,000.

-Said that my dad threw fork at her
when I saw the entire thing and this
was not true

-Screamed, yelled and threatened me over
the years. One time my mom threatened to
kill me when I was a kid.

All these things happen when my mom was not
stable. My mom is not like this. But if she
is not stable, not taking medication or
on the wrong medication this and more
is possible.

When you look at the headlines that are horrible,
you find the common denominator is that so and
so got off their medication and then did this really
bad thing.

In my courses/systems below:

SUPPORTING AN ADULT WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarsupporter.com/report11

SUPPORTING A CHILD/TEEN WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarparenting.com

HAVE BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.survivebipolar.net
I talk about how to not only get some to admit
they have the disorder, but to get them into treatment
I have found more than 20 ways to do this), and also
help a person feel better about the disorder and want
to accept it.

It takes time and you need a system. It’s taken me a lot
to put it together.

Anyway today I wanted to talk about these 8 whys
in depth and give you some “food” for thought.

I hope it was helpful.

Finally I want to say to anyone out there that
is not treating their bipolar disorder seriously.
Not only are you hurting yourself, but you are hurting
your family. You are making yourself look bad. There’s
nothing positive. If you aren’t getting proper treatment,
do yourself a favor and go ahead and go and see a
doctor and get back on track. I urge you to do so.

Okay, I have to take off to take my mom out for mothers
day. Have a great day!

Your Friend,

Dave

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emails sent to you for F.ree? If so, visit:
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Get More Help On Bipolar Disorder
Don’t forget to take a look through the
different programs I’ve put together… each
one is designed to help you with a different
area of bipolar disorder whether you have it or
you are supporting someone with it.
You can see them all and get the details by visiting:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/catalog.asp

View Past Daily Bipolar Emails For F.REE
Check out my F.ree blog with copies of emails
that I have sent in the past and lots of great
information for you:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/supporterblog/

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Check out my F.ree podcast. Hear me give
mini seminars designed to teach you information
you can’t learn anywhere else.
http://bipolarcentral.libsyn.com

  2. Good Morning Dave; I hope you have a wonderful day with your Mom. I must say again my day does not start until I have my ‘morning coffee with Dave’. I read your email this morning with interest. yes it took several time for it to click due to the ‘MS’, but I did get there. Taking meds, must be a joke huh? I feel like I keep the CVS in business just from my scrips alone, what is another script. You see, I enjoy breathing, just seems to be something I need to do. When you love someone, better half, children, parents, friends, flowers, whatever or whoever, you take your meds. If you can’t do it for yourself, do it for who/what you love, that is how i survive every day. I love God and my Boys and Brother, so I take my meal of meds every day. Try it those of you who want to stop your meds. Look in the mirror and have a nice talk with yourself, then think twice. Who do you love? What do you love? I promise you it does work…

  3. Hi, Everybody!

    I’ve been really ill and then very busy catching up on stuff. I hope that everybody’s feeling okay?

    I’m not going to be filmed for the ‘Week In – Week Out’ TV Documentary about Bipolar, but a lot of my stuff will be used in the narration and David Oliver’s Website will be offered to the Public at the end and also placed permanently onto the ‘B.B.C.’s’ Website.

    Instead, there will be two Women, one with many Children, having the threat of them being taken away and another with Children, trying to decide whether or not to terminate her Pregnancy. There will also be two Men, one almost exactly like me in character and an Asian Man who’s had the Condition for a long time, as apparently the Researchers have found that ‘Ethnic Minorities’ are more likely to have it. (?) The Narrator will be an old friend and neighbour of mine, the infamous Comic and Welsh Scriptwriter ‘Boyd Clack’, who used to be a Psychiatric Nurse and also has Depression himself.

    The Documentary will be broadcast on Tuesday 20th May 2008 at 10.35pm within Wales, U.K., but from the next day anybody should be able to download and watch it. I’ll post more details nearer the day, if that’s okay with David Oliver.

    I’m busy on this hot Spring day trying to do ten things at once. I’ve got the ‘Adams Family’, alias Martin’s family, coming over tonight for Dinner and I’m attempting to re-plant stuff, tidy up and keep calm.

    Have a good day, everybody. Take care,

    Sue and all the animals. x

  4. i totally agree,but when u have to take 8 pills in the morning three pills at lunch and 9 pills in the evening my wife fells like all she is is a pill attic like her life revolves around taking pills i try to explain that its just something that has to be done to keep her well, but she gets tired of it somedays.question were moving to fortlauderdale do u know of any good mental health doctors, or jobs that accept someone that has bi-polar email me at chadwick6969@aol.com hope u and ur mom had a great mothers day!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  6. Dave-Just got my first ‘newsletter’ from you, and I have a couple of comments:
    Marshal McLuhan said that the medium is the message and I find that I must agree. Your newsletter had numerous copy-write errors. and I find that takes away from my willingness to accept your message as anything more than a quickly dashed tirade. I expected more.

    I find it in pretty poor taste, and sadly humiliating and shaming of your mother, that you would use such a public forum, and on Mothers’ Day no less, to enumerate the list of unfortunate bad behaviors your mother exhibited when she was untreated. I don’t see the point.

    I also don’t know what authority you have bestowed upon yourself that entitles you to speak definitively about any known facts proving that bi-polar disorder has no cure. Much more is unknown than known about this disorder and the human brain, and people are all quite different as you surely would admit. The brain is our final frontier and I don’t think we should close the door so solidly on continued exploration by claiming we know it all.

    As far as claiming that going off of medicines will completely cause ruined lives/sure and significant disaster-this is a little over the top Dave. It seems as though you are taking an extreme stance in an area that you do not seem to be completely qualified to pontificate upon. It’s possible that many would get worse by stopping medications-and that could lead to many troubles no doubt. The picture might get less than pretty in many cases. Some folks can and do manage and do well drug free! this is a matter best discussed with one’s medical management team. I don’t care for your dire prognosis for all of us-nor do I believe it serves.

    I would greatly appreciate it if you would please consider using words such as ‘in my opinion’, ‘as far as I know’, and ‘I have come to believe’ more often than not. I also suggest that for my money (yes I know it’s free-it’s a little joke) if you were to please check over your work before you hit ‘send’, I personally might find it more readable, and deem it more carefully thought out.

    Lastly, if you’re to write about your mother’s transgression when in the throws of her illness, I for one would much rather hear it directly from her;rather than seeing her dirty laundry aired out by her son for no apparent good reason. If your mom had urinary incontinence would you tell me all the times she had an accident or episode of incontinence? I don’t think so. I am sorry that as a child you were threatened by a parent/or anyone for that matter.
    I find it kind of clinically messy that you are seeking to openly cleanse your personal wounds while preaching to the sick ones who may or may not have caused these type of wounds to their own loved ones.

    There seems to be a boundary missing that shows acceptance and understanding for those with a disorder they can not always manage, until it is too late. I get the AA approach somewhat-but it does seem like since your Mom is not anonymous that she should be the one who does her own inventory.
    Sorry this is so long…yep I’m one of the diagnosed…and this is how I write as a ‘side effect’.

  7. Hi Dyeann,

    I agree there are a lot of writing errors in the newsletter. It distracts me at times trying to figure out what it is supposed to say. Sometimes it the newsletter is very meandering and takes a long time to get to the point.

    Having said that, the newsletter is directed to a large volume of people. Most people with bipolar need to take meds to keep them stable – I don’t think that is over the top. And if someone is not stable, meds are the fastest way to get them stable, whether or not they remain on them as per a medical team. In my experience, when people stop taking meds it is their choice and they did not consult their doctor(s). Not all bipolar is the same, but for my loved one it is pretty certain he needs his meds to be stable at this time.

    I see your point about his comments on Mother’s Day, it could have waited until some other day. I dunno. This is how Dave writes his newsletters.

    Even with all these faults I still find the newsletters very helpful. It is like having a daily burst of support. Sometimes being a supporter isn’t easy but the newsletters keep me on track, and some days, keep me going because there aren’t a lot of people I can talk with about being a supporter. Overall the newsletters give me hope, which is exactly what people living with this illness in either themselves or their loved ones need.

    Give this newsletter a chance.

    Take care,
    Juliet

  8. I would like to address Dyeann and her reaction to Dave this morning. Dyeann, you stated that this is your first ‘morning with Dave’ and you don’t seem to be very pleased with him. For this I am really sorry. I do hope that you will stick with us and try to understand that he, Dave, is simply a man who is trying to help us, bipolar survivours, to get thru our days a bit easier. I would like to extent to you my friendship via email. Please feel free to email me at: MSMADHATTER50@YAHOO.COM, it would be both my privledge and pleasure to add you to my friends list. I look forward to hearing from you if you chose to take advantage of my offer. Respectfully always

  9. To Dyeann,

    I would like to say one other thing in reference to the comment by dyeann:

    “I find it in pretty poor taste, and sadly humiliating and shaming of your mother.”

    Actually Dyeann my mom has given me permission on I believe 8 different occasions to use her story, print the whole truth and educate people about the realities of what happens with bipolar disorder. Before I started this, I had my mom sign an agreement and had her do so for several months afterwards. She has read virtually EVERYTHING that I have written.

    She is not going to be writing stuff on the internet anytime soon. Why? She doesn’t have the time or the desire. She is busy.

    My mom feels (I am sure you think I am making this up :)), that if she was given truthful information about bipolar disorder she would not have wasted years and years of her life.

    My mom feels that we could all make up stuff, lie for years, about what happens with bipolar disorder and sugar coat what really happens and basically have a situation where people get mislead for half if not all their lives. But she feels this is wrong. This is what happen to her. This is what happens to MILLIONS of people everyday. They are not told the truth about bipolar disorder.

    With that said, I think I may even post the agreements that I have signed from my mom to use her story and to freely talk about what happen. Yes, I have gotten that and gotten every year since I started. In addition both her doctor and therapist are okay with my entire website and feel that it society.

    I would say every couple of months I get the “Dave you are really mean, I can’t believe you take advantage of your mom, you’re a terrible person, shame on you, you’re going to hell, etc.) I’ve been doing this for a while. I heard ever possible statement.

    Finally, I find that there are people that want to go to the end of the earth to tell people with bipolar disorder things that are NOT best practices. Taking medication is best practices.

    I look at it this way. If someone in high school said “can you give me the best practices or things most likely to lead to business and personal success?” Imagine this person continued to say, “should I drop out of school, do drugs, drink all the time, hang out on the beach and then try to become a successful in a career and personally?” “Or should I stay in school, not take drugs, not drink all the time, go to college, set goals, etc.”

    I am sure you can guess what I would tell the person, the second path. BUT, you can find people who did the first path and did eventually become a success. But is it likely? The answer is no. So I promote things that are highly probable to help a person with bipolar disorder–that equals finding a great doctor, taking the medication as prescribed, and following a proper treatment plan.

    I am sure we find people who do everything possibly wrong and do great. I never find them but I am sure a few of them exist. There are people on my list that swear that doing illegal drugs every single day is good for you.

    As I write this, I think of the few remaining people that I know who smoke cigarettes. Each will cite that they know one person who smoke 10 packs a day for 50 years and lived over 100. I laugh when I hear this because obviously smoking leads to early death. Even though die hard smokers want to tell you how it doesn’t, they want to tell you about that one person, they want to tell you about the statistical outlier–the person who deviates from the norm. They all know people who smoke tons and live a long time. They want to talk about the smoking urban legend–the one who smokes all the time for decades and is in great health.

    You probably aren’t going to like my newsletter because I am not going to tell you what you want to hear. That’s not my job and that’s not my goal.

    It’s comforting to know some like what I say with all the errors you mention because I now have over 220,000 sign ups and I believe over 7,000 testimonials. You are right, I could spend more time on the newsletter. I could spend hours on it a day but I have a long list of things to do and I committed so spending no more than 1 hour per day 365 days a year to the newsletter. I can’t do any more when it comes to the newsletter. Sorry.

    Enjoy your day.

    Dave

  10. Hello Again Dyeann; You may be upset with me now, I just re-read my comment to you and saw that I had made a spelling error and didn’t catch it before I hit the send button. I do so apologize. I want to extend to you my friendship, not extent to you my friendship. So see, any of us can make a mistake. I have a bad case of ‘fumble fingers”. Have a wonderful Mothers day if you are a mom, if not, just have a wonderful day.

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