Hi,

Let me ask you something: Do you ever feel as if you’re the only one going through what you’re going through right now? The only one who has to deal with the problems that you have to deal with? Would it help you to know that you aren’t the only one? If you have financial problems, well, so do other people. If you have marital problems, well, so do other people. If you have problems with your children, well, so do other people. If you have problems at work, well, so do other people. Maybe you can learn from your problems. Maybe it’s just a matter of learning how to problem solve.

Like in the case of financial problems, you might want to look at getting out of debt. You can talk to a debt counselor about that. You might want to look at where your money is going. You can sit down with your loved one and figure that out, and then develop a budget. Then you have to stick to living within your means. It may take time, but if you do these things, you may no longer have financial problems.

And you must know that you’re not the only person with a loved one who has bipolar disorder.
You can go to just one support group meeting and find other people in the same boat as you are in. You can even get some good advice on dealing with your own loved one from a support group. Unfortunately, in our culture we have become isolated from each other. To the point that we sometimes think we’re the only person with the problems that we have. That makes those problems harder to solve.

Sometimes we get jealous of other people. We think they’ve got it easier than we do. Kind of like “the grass is always greener on the other side” type of thing. But everyone has problems.
Would you even want to trade yours for someone else’s? Think about it. You know the expression, “No matter how bad you’ve got it, someone else has it worse.” That’s true. And remembering that can help you have a more positive attitude. Some people just sit around waiting for “the other shoe to drop.” They expect that they’re going to have more problems than they already have. That’s like you waiting on eggshells for your loved one’s next episode. That’s no way to live. You have to believe in your loved one’s stability. Otherwise, it’s just another unsolvable problem.

No, you are not the only one. Many millions of people right now are struggling with bipolar disorder. The difference between it being a problem or not is how you approach it. Either it controls you, or you control it. What are you doing today to help your loved one get control over their bipolar disorder? Are you being a good supporter and helping them to manage their disorder? Or are you spending too much time worrying…Maybe even feeling sorry for yourself…Thinking that you’re the only one going through what you’re going through?

Well, I have to go!

Your Friend,

Dave