Hi,
They say that life experiences change people. You know about Superstorm Sandy? Well, I was lucky. It didn’t get me bad, just some flooded streets. But my mom lost power for a while. And other people were hurt much worse. Those people’s lives were forever changed by a natural disaster. It was a horrible life experience for them. But now they have a chance to start over and make changes.
Divorce changes people. Have you ever known anyone who got divorced (or gotten divorced yourself)? Then you know that divorce definitely changes people. Two people that may have been in love at one time now may hate each other, or at least have nothing good to say about each other. They’re different people now. They may be bitter.
Changing careers can change a person as well. They may have to adapt to a whole new way of doing things than they did at their other job. And aging definitely changes people. All their life experiences combined change them from who they were at one time to who they are now.
We are all the result of our life experiences. Good and bad. Having children, for example.
Somehow, being responsible for a small baby changes people. For one thing, it makes them more serious and responsible. They want to be a good parent, so they change into one.
Other experiences change people, too. Finding out that you have an incurable disease can really change you. Like bipolar disorder. It can bring with it changes, which can be for better or for worse.
Okay, let’s talk about the down side first. Your loved one may become a different person
because of the disorder. They are definitely different when they go through episodes as opposed to when they are in a normal period. If your loved one gets depressed, they are not the same person you usually know. They may be sad, lose interest in things, feel helpless and hopeless, or even talk of suicide. Of course this is a bad experience. If your loved one gets manic, they also experience changes. They may be more energetic and/or be excessively happy, which sound like they would be good things, but for someone in a bipolar manic episode, they aren’t. They may become very impulsive, do risk-taking behavior, and make bad decisions. So a manic episode is a bad experience as well.
However, let’s look at the other side of the coin. Yes, bipolar disorder does change a person, but sometimes it’s for the better. For one thing, now you have a reason for why your loved one said and did the things they did. Bipolar disorder can make a person more determined. Many people refuse to let the disorder rule their lives, so they do what they can to be in control of it instead of it being in control of them. Bipolar disorder can make a person take more responsibility for themselves. Many people, bound for stability, will make the necessary life changes to insure that stability. They will take medication, go to see their doctor, psychiatrist, and therapist on a regular basis, learn stress reduction techniques, eat a healthy diet, get better sleep, exercise, etc.
Bipolar disorder can also change your loved one into someone who may have been a pessimist before, but now is an optimist, believing that they can recover from the disorder.
All our life experiences change us. But it’s up to us whether they change us for the better or for the worse.
Well, I have to go!
Your Friend,
Dave
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I like your article review
Yes! My boyfriend is going through a divorce this very minute. I have never been married! 🙂 you would think that he would be the world’s most bitter soul. He is the most forgiving human being I have ever met. Of course I was never in his or anyone’s marriage so I dont’ quite know what he may or may not have contributed to someone who was eager to dissolve this union. You know how people are – they always never know why someone would no longer want to be “near them”…you know what I’m talking about. they “scientifically” forget their contribution.
Anyways……it was like a superstorm – he didnt’ see any of the things that came into his life coming. Bipolar and many other things can seem that way. You could just be minding your own business and a job, a friendship etc. could be that superstorm – I keep him in mind when I think of how to cope if this ever comes into my life in another way besides marriage – forgiveness doesn’t mean that what person did was alright it just shows that you as the individual are willing to “release” said person from your very thoughts and very being as if “the storm never existed” it’s good for your well being and it’s good energy sent back to that person or persons as they start to feel wow I am literally the last person in this person’s universe. I’m literally on the bottom of their list….they’ve come into so many other things that are apparently keeping them happy is what that’s all about!
Dave,
Thank you SO MUCH for your emails and courses. They give me knowledge, relief, and, most importantly, hope. I “think” my spouse is bipolar (from your writings and my experiences with her). Now, after over 2 years trying, she is agreeing to see a therapist. She still “cancels” at the last moment, but we are trying. Please keep helping. Thanks again!