Hi,

You know, they say that there are two kinds of people in the world: Those that look at the glass as half empty…And those that look at the glass as half full. Those that see the glass as half empty are said to be pessimists. And those that see the glass as half full are said to be optimists.

Then they say that there are those that just see a glass of water. Those, they say, are realists. If, given a choice, which would you be? Which would you say you are? Nobody likes to be a pessimist, but unfortunately, some people are anyway. Those are the people that most people like to avoid, because nobody likes being around someone who is negative all the time. It’s better to be an optimist, with a positive attitude.

Many times, I talk about how it’s good to have a positive attitude when you’re dealing with a loved one with bipolar disorder. Because there is already enough negativity that you have to deal with. And many times that negativity is coming from your loved one themselves.

For example: Many people with bipolar disorder will claim that you are being unfair to them (usually when they are in an episode and you do something like take away the money). Or they will say that life isn’t fair to them (usually when they’re feeling depressed). They will blame everything and everyone else for their problems. They just won’t take responsibility for their own problems. That’s a big issue with many people who suffer from bipolar disorder when they are unstable. And especially a big issue for their supporters, because they are usually the ones who are getting the blame. So it may be hard for you to be an optimist in light of that issue.

Sometimes it may be very difficult for you to be positive in light of all the negativity surrounding you. I can understand that. When my mom was going through her worst bipolar episode ever and was screaming things at me like, “I hate you and I don’t want you to be my son any more,” I was so hurt. I wondered how I could possibly stay positive in the light of such hurtful things. But then I thought of it this way: My mom was very sick…But things (and my mom) would get better. Those two ideas kept me going. And they helped me to keep a positive attitude IN

SPITE OF the things I had going against me.

It didn’t mean that I wasn’t being realistic. Not at all. I still faced the opposition against me.

I dealt with the problems I was up against. I still helped my mom deal with her issues, like

the way things were financially because of when she had gone manic and gotten so out of control. So it wasn’t that I wasn’t realistic. But I was optimistic. I still held onto the idea that things would get better, IN SPITE OF…That’s what kept me going. That idea of IN SPITE OF.

In spite of the fact that my mom was sick, she was eventually going to get better. In spite of the way things looked at the time, I still believed that they would eventually get better. In spite of the fact that my mom had bipolar disorder, I still believed that with the right treatment, she would improve and eventually recover. In spite of the things she was yelling and screaming

at me at the time and how hurtful they were, I still believed that she ultimately didn’t know what she was saying and didn’t mean them, so I was able to forgive her. In spite of the negative things I was feeling, I was still able to be optimistic. See what I mean?

If you can rise above things…If you can hold onto the positive IN SPITE OF the negative…

You can be an optimist too. Then you will be able to handle things so much better. Of course, like me, you will still need to be a realist as well. Some things you can’t ignore. You will still need to talk to your loved one about behavior that bothers you, for example. But IN SPITE OF things they do that bother you, you can still love them and be supportive of their efforts to get better IN SPITE OF their bipolar disorder.

Well, I have to go!

Your Friend,

Dave