Hi, how’s it going? Hope you are doing well.

I heard a concept a long time ago that has stuck with me. It happens to be based in a certain spirituality, but I don’t think that anyone has to be of that spirituality to understand or use this concept. Maybe you’ve heard of it. It’s commonly called “The Serenity Prayer.” I’ll edit it a little bit so that it doesn’t include the spiritual base.

“Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and wisdom to know the difference.” If you really think about it, this is a good concept for everyone.

See, there are things in everyone’s life that we’d like to change, but we can’t. There are also things that we can change (whether we’d like to or not.) 😛 An important first step is to learn the difference between these two types of situations. That way we won’t waste our time trying to change things when it’s simply not going to work. Also, we can focus on the things that we can make an impact on in our lives. But first we have to know the difference.

One of the simplest differences is a situation that is out of our control and our personal reactions to it. The most relevant example would be that you can’t control if you or your loved one has bipolar disorder or not. But you can control how you react to it, what choices you make despite it, and how you plan for and against it. You can control how it affects your life.

There isn’t a magic pill that a person can take to wish it away, and plain and simple wishing won’t help either. But we can “make the most of what we’ve got.”

I’ve heard a saying, “When life gives you lemons, make lemonade.” Well, without sugar and water, the lemonade isn’t going to taste very good. LOL. So maybe you should make a point in investing in the sugars and waters of life. That is to say, maybe you should make a point in investing in the things, skills, and people that will make life easier to manage, even despite bipolar disorder.

Another example of things we cannot change is our past choices. But the things we can change is whether we choose to learn from those choices and make better ones today and tomorrow. We cannot change the past, but we can always learn from it. After all, where we are going is more important than where we have been.

Another example: we cannot change who our family is, but we can change how we react to them, whether we choose to be around them, and who our friends are. If your family is loving and supportive, then not only should you be “hanging around” them, but you should also be doing anything you can to make life easier for them, so that they can do the same for you in return.

If, on the other hand, your family does more to bring you down and make life harder on you, then it might be better to avoid going to family functions and other meetings with them. You have to use your better judgment in matters like that. If you cannot decide on your own, then ask a supporter or therapist to help you analyze the situation and come up with a positive solution.

There are a lot of situations in life, especially in life with bipolar disorder, that cannot be controlled. But there is always at least one aspect of the situation that we can control and put our input into. If nothing else, how we choose to act and react is our choice to make. Many times, there are other things that we can change as well.

“Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.” May this be true in your life.

Well, I have to go!

Your Friend,

Dave