Hi,
How’s it going for you today?
I hope you have a great day today.
I actually have a ton of work to do so I have to get moving pretty quick.
Let’s jump into today’s topic.
I hired a firm to help me with a major problem I had with my website.
Well, this firm fixed SOME of the problems I had, but I later found out that if I had used a different solution it would have saved me a ton of time and money.
The reason why I went to the first firm is that I was uneducated and didn’t take the time to learn about the problem.
I just trusted the first so-called expert that came my way.
You can’t just blindly trust everything you hear or see.
With bipolar disorder, you have to be educated.
You have to become your own expert on the disorder.
I educate people through my courses/systems, but I also tell them to never stop learning about bipolar disorder.
SUPPORTING AN ADULT WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarsupporter.com/report11
SUPPORTING A CHILD/TEEN WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarparenting.com
HAVE BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
You might even have to get a second opinion.
Doctors are just people, and they can make mistakes.
Question your doctor.
Question the experts.
You also will have to use your own judgment.
Sometimes even trust your own gut feeling – that if something doesn’t “feel” right, it may be wrong.
You do have to have some faith but many times, people just blindly follow experts without questioning.
Even with me, question ALL that I tell you.
Look hard at what I am saying.
Compare it to other information you find.
Bipolar disorder is an individual disease.
Although it has its own symptoms, and everyone who is diagnosed with the disorder is diagnosed by those symptoms, they still are different in different people.
Also, your loved one may have more than just bipolar disorder.
People can have more than one disorder at a time.
So if your loved one has some symptoms that are outside the bipolar symptoms, question it.
Another thing is too that bipolar disorder can change.
Your loved one may have been diagnosed with (and have symptoms for) one type of bipolar disorder, and then later on show symptoms of another type of bipolar disorder.
If so, question it.
Then question your loved one’s doctor about it.
Don’t just think it’s all in your head.
And always keep learning.
Even the experts don’t know everything there is to know about bipolar disorder.
And each person with the disorder is different, as well.
You have to learn to deal with (and help manage) your loved one’s bipolar disorder.
The more you know, the better it will be for both of you.
You also have to learn how to be a good supporter to your loved one.
The books and experts don’t teach you that.
That is something you need to learn on your own.
You can get some advice from other people, like maybe people in your support group, but ultimately it is your own judgment that you’ll be using.
Many things associated with bipolar disorder come by way of trial and error.
You need to use your knowledge base, but you also need to use your common sense.
Use whatever works with your own loved one.
Have you ever read or heard about something associated with bipolar disorder that just didn’t seem right to you?
What did you do about it?
Post responses below
Dear Dave, and all bloggers: Today (August 24) is my 45th birthday. Normally, I would feel great about this, but I feel miserable for some reason. I think I might be having a down-swing in my mood today, partly because of the fact that I am realizing how alone I feel because I am still single after all of these years and can’t buy a girlfriend, if you know what I mean. Meaningful relationships seem to elude me these days, and I am really down over that. Hope all of you are having a good day, or at least better than mine. Brian.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY, BRIAN!!! I know you may feel lonely right now, but I wasn’t married until I was 36 years old. Relationships ARE hard when you have any form of a mental illness, especially bipolar. I met both of my late husbands in Support Groups at our local Community Mental Health Clinic; could you attend one of those in your area? It is a myth that two people who are disabled can’t fall in love.
There are many ways to meet kindred spirits; you can go to church; attend Support groups; a book club; anything where you “get yourself out there.”
I feel your “down-ness,” and wish you all the luck in the world in finding meaningful friendships AND, possibly a “soul mate.” It CAN happen, and I’m “living proof!”
Again, have a HAPPY BIRTHDAY and plan ways to generate a friendship or two. Good luck!!
BIG HUGS to all bipolar survivors and those who love us. May God bless you real good. I pray for my coutry.
I was going to respond about trusting the experts!
The two comments I read were heartfelt and I should
probably share what is going on right now with my son
who is 36 and is on his 24th admission. His first was
when he was 16 hospitalized for 3 and half months
because of the trials and errors. Life has not been
easy for him because of all the side effects with
changes of meds and trying to cope and of course his family and caregivers coping too. So special when
the mental health professionals tell me some positive
things about him when he gets better and other people too. He has his days because he would like to be married to someone or have a special companion. Seems
in my family guys tend to find their special mate later on in life. My Dad’s father was 45 and had two children. My brother lives in the family home that
was built in 1915. I think of good memories
not the sad ones. My third cousin just got married being 47 a first marriage for him and his wife.
Every day is a new day and a day to tell ourselves
what can be positive with my day and try to fulfill the day with special events. My son has been a member of
two clubhouses for several years now. The activities
there have been so good for him. The Softball games
of the week this summer have been wonderful for him.
He was able to work for 3 years with encouragement
from the people at the clubhouse. Now its been
almost 4 years he has not worked med related!
We are all gifts to each other and I am very thankful
to Dave and others helping many through their sharings.
When ones are afflicted with mental illness there can be
many experts. I just continue my prayers there will be
better communication especially between hospital doctors and the mental health teams with the right information. My son has had so many trials and errors of meds. In fact one has
been tried 7 times and what concerns me the most is
if he did not have insurance would these meds be prescribed. The past few months his meds have cost
$1200 and in the year 2000 the cost of $1400 a month.
Bob has surprised many of the experts with his recoveries.
I am very thankful to the individuals who have helped in good ways these past years and we all need to try
to support one another the best we can when we can.
A person’s greatest emotional need is to feel appreciated. Love and Prayers continue for what is
good and peaceful for each of us.
God’s Blessings today and always!
yoo davie babe……
wots it all about…
🙂
Dave, excellent blog today. Thank you for all you are doing. I am a long time survivor of bipolar and other diagnosed and misdiagnosed disorders. I was diagnosed as having major depression in the early 80’s. I was in a very bad marriage that was crumbling after the loss of our first born, ofcourse I had depression.
Later, manic-depression was what the experts decided I had. Since I wanted to have more children, I delayed starting medicine for many years. You can live with this illness without medication. Many actually have fewer hospitalizations without medicines. Medicine, if it is used in moderation, can help you cope, but too many health care professionals do not understand enough about the damage too much medicine causes.
For many years I blindly followed what my doctors told me to do. I knew the medicines did not seem to do for me what they were supposed to, but I continued in the hopes that one of the combos would someday actually help me, they did not. Oh yes, they could keep me in a chemical straight jacket, but what do they do when break out mania occurs when you are already over-medicated with the wrong meds? They give you more.
I got smarter, I stopped (blindly) listening to the professionals. My body and mind have been bombarded with so many unnatural chemicals. I weigh too much. I am in so much physical pain, emotional pain. My skin has been permanently damaged(early stages of cancer) from this latest experiment from the experts (they decided that if they just gave me a little of what I was allergic to, it might just work) It did not. Now organs are shutting down too.
I did not intend to share all this, but I have no one in my life. I have been alone most of my life. No one has ever loved, respected or enjoyed my company, unless they were taking me for everything they could.
My relationship challenges do not stem so much from the bipolar but from the borderline personality disorder, PTSD.
My latest causualties are my adult sons, their significant others and my grandchilren.
Seems they have no use for me. Never contact me unless they need money, my car, etc. Never let me see my grandchildren. Never include me in their lives. Forget my birthday, ignore Mother’s Day, Christmas, Thanksgiving, etc.
I made the mistake of voicing my hurt at not seeing my granddaughter since my son married and moved to another state. His young wife brought my 5 year old granddaughter right past my house every other weekend, but could never see any reason to stop and let me see her. I could not go there to see her, because I was stuck without any transportation (my younger son has had my only car for 2 years.
Seems he felt I should have come to see her if I wanted to see her. Now, his wife has convinced my younger sons significant other to not let me see those grandchildren also.
During this time frame, I woke up out of the depths of depression and zombie land from taking this medicine I was allergic to. Well, the shutdown was partly from being miserable, having an unbearable life. I just shut down to not feel all the pain of rejection and loss of the love from my granddaughter and my formerly supportive son.
Today, I had to get the police to stand by as I took my car from my son. I need to be able to come and go. I need to be allowed to try to find a way to live the rest of my life in peace. I moved into a place of my own. I had been living under my sister and brother in laws (care). He claims me as a dependent but does not financially support me in any way. So they are mad at me too. My checks still go to their mailbox.
We will see on the 3rd, if they will try to keep my money away from me. If they do, I will lose my home, my insurance and all my stuff again. Nothing new. But I am getting too old and infirm to be homeless on the streets being taken advantage of by all the alcoholics and drug abusers who are also homeless.
Sorry for all this, I just needed to send it out there. I hope this does not cause anyone else to stumble.
Just never give up, it may not get better and you may or may not acquire the ability to cope better, but if you gave up, you might miss out on something good that might be just around the corner.
At least I am at peace, no more conflicts, no more waiting by the phone or computer for the people I love to make contact. I am free of all their drama, I guess I should be grateful, instead I grieve all my losses.
Tomorrow is another day. Perhaps the weather will be nice, the birds will be singing, the squirrels playing, the garden will bloom something beautiful. Maybe I will learn to be content in my self imposed hermatage.
There is an advertisement that goes like this…”The best consumer is an educated consumer…” The more you know the better decisions you will make. I think the medical profession trys to do this with brochures but the Doctors need to emphasize this more in their practice (like second opinions) This disease is tough for all to deal with but you need to keep informed because the more you know the easier things become….