Bipolar Disorder? What is Success?

David Oliver | Daily Bipolar Disorder Message

Hi,

Hope you’re having a good day.

I want to ask you a question today:

What is success?

I mean, what do you think success is, what is the definition of success?

Webster’s dictionary says that the definition of success is, “the attainment of wealth, favor, or eminence”  (power).

Do you agree?

Do you think that just because you’ve made lots of money that you’re successful?

Or that if you’ve obtained favor from the president that you’ve obtained success?

Or because you’ve got a lot of power that you’re successful? Well, I’m sorry to disagree with you if you think any of those things, but I just don’t think that they work when it comes to bipolar disorder.

I just can’t see my mom standing before the president (lol).

And I can’t see me rich, since I don’t take a salary at all, and I’m not in this for the money anyway.

And I know you probably don’t have a lot of money, because you probably spend most of it just trying to take care of your loved one with bipolar disorder – for their doctor and therapist visits and for their medications. That can cost a whole lot, I know!

So does that mean that none of us have success?

I define success differently.

It has to do with something I teach in my courses /systems below:

NEW LEARN THE SECRETS OF THE MOST SUCCESSFUL WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
http://www.bipolarsupporter.com/bipolarmastersystem/

SUPPORTING AN ADULT WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarsupporter.com/report11

SUPPORTING A CHILD/TEEN WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarparenting.com

HAVE BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.survivebipolar.net
I talk about setting long- and short-term goals.

See, I think success is the achieving of the goals you’ve set for yourself (whether you have bipolar disorder or not).

Like, I originally set out with my website to reach as many people as I could with bipolar disorder and their supporters with the message that even though there isn’t any cure for bipolar disorder, there is treatment.

I wanted them to have a place they could come where they could get the most up-to-date information on the disorder in a user-friendly, easy-to-understand, NOT-doctor-speak way.

That’s why I started my website, and my courses/systems, the f.ree mini-course, daily emails, newsletters, and all the rest.

And SO many people have been helped! I know, because they write me all the time! I have SO many testimonials! You can read them for yourself, if you don’t believe me.

So, I think I’m a success not because I’m wealthy, or I have favor, or just because Webster’s dictionary says those things are what success is…

But I think I’m successful because I set my goals, I went after them, and I achieved them.

What about you?

Do you agree or disagree with Webster’s dictionary’s definition of success?

I’d like to hear what YOU think success is.

FIND OUT WHAT PEOPLE ARE SAYING ABOUT ME
Visit: http://www.bipolarcentral.com/testimonials

David Oliver is the author of the shocking guide “Bipolar Disorder—The REAL Silent Killer.” Click Here to get FREE Information sent via email on how and why bipolar disorder kills.

  2. HI….I would just like to make a comment on your question
    about success. I think success is to go with your dream try your hardest and you will reach your goal and thats wot success is.

    linda x

  3. success huh its is getting your goal whatever that may be, but to get it can be a battle to get it

  4. i just wanted to let you know i like your email every day even tho i cant pay any money at all to get stuff and take your course but i just love your emails and i believe success is that your daught is happy and your husband happy and that they and every other person i know is healthy that is success and that i dont hurt anyones feeling or any thing about them i know if i would ever succeed in my thoughts of not been here anymore would hurt them i dont know if my daught could handle i feel like i am a buriden to them plus i cant drive so i have to ask my husband to take me somewhere which is to doctor i dont like to leave the house i do go out to take my dog out to play and walks and pick up poop that is a exciting thing for me todo and we walk to mail box which is kinda far we live way up on a hill plus my husband dont like me to go far outside because i pass out a lot they dont know why and if i try to do any thing in the house i usual fall off small latter and then have more bruises than usual first i fell down our basement stairs had a little broken ribs and i was all alone and must of hit my head on concete wall that is at bottom of steps when i came to there was so much blood that when i crawed up to top of stairs i called my mother in law and she came over and said are you sure you didnt get hurt worst and she looked at basement steps she just started looking me over because there was a lot of blood and then i started getting dizzy all the time i was tying my shoes and i had my foot on a chair so i could tie my shoe and got dizzy and couldnt stop lost balanced and my husband said he couldnt caught me and landed flat on back and he said i heard you land and had goose egg on back of head the size of a softball so i spent a few days in hospital so i am not allowed to drive thats been about 4 years ago and about a year ago i tried to end it but husband kept me from doing it and spent a while in a stress center well thats all from this person
    debie brown

  5. You are right, success is each mans dream or goal in life. I set mine at 16, I had only mom to raise me and for a short time a stepfather that was a bum. My personal goal in life was to marry, and stay married and raise a family. I have three son’s and been married to the same love for over 40 years. I will not stop loving or helping my son’s when they need it most. My son Tony has bipolar and it is hard, but he is on the med. and doing what he needs to do, getting help. From what I have seen money is not a sign of success in it self it is how you use it for others. John

  6. David Oliver, I’m not quite sure about SPAM, or other intrudging things, but as it was my own discision to enscribe to your (probably automaticaly) news-letter & didn’t open any of your links (this is my – first – reaction on the matter of succes in your 6th email), afraid of spam or whatever, I do want to tell you, that for my part “succes” lays in “Going on.” (Most people call it surviving.) & for me particulary, raising my 3 children mostly on my own (daughter almost 19 years; her father is my best friend/like elder brother still), my son (12 years, only a little bit a – violent in the last years towards me – “bio-father” ’till he was 2.5. years…) and although sterilization a daughter (just turned 4 years old, whose bio-dad strangled me 6 months pregnant, so then immediately out of my life, I don’t need allimention, won’t get it anyway and both last 2 “bio-dads” where violent, although with all 3 the relation was over 5years…) typical Hypomaan writing not? (Bi-polair 1 + E.R.S. + trauma’s, but that’s called life and I’m not a label or many more, I know now I need to seek my help in family and beloved ones, though few, but I take my 29 pills every 24 hours…)Állthough the financial and therefore the doctors / psychiatrical bills are ALL paided for by the governement/insurement in The Netherlands, you probably can’t imangine our social security system – where for example if one doesn’t have a job one gets much more money, being jobless, as in the U.S.A. & also the special ensurement for psychiatrical bills will be beyond your imagination: If one gets hospilized because of psychiatrical problems ALL will be paid by the governement (By the taxes people pay, even unemployed people get written off an amount of money for that taxes, hospitalization – wether psychiatrical or physical – and still have enough for a home, food, and more… Europe is MUCH different!!!) I will become 42 very soon (Aquarius) & I do have more fysical pain then mental now I think. But I am happy, that my memory is very poor about certain things I know parts of and know I don’t want to know more about it. E.R.S. stands for Emotion Regulation Disturbance, the “good old” Borderline… As in the (soon to be renewed I read) DSM4 where Bi-polair ! is on ASS1 and E.R,.S. on ASS 2 (The last one together with “low intelligence”, how funny!) I have also now 1500 mgr.Depakone per 24 hours as a “sense-filter”, which is double more then an severe epilepticus gets and I’m no epilepticus… Too many pills, but it’s inheritive, by genes, yes and the para-meters, the influences in your youth (No incest for me luckily!) Need to go shopping (carry 14 kilo on my back having my 5th hernia… pitty me…lol) Thanx, Mirte.

  8. Dave,

    I think success is when you have achieved just one more day in your struggle. I also think to have my daughter take one more step toward living in a high state of recovery is success. I know that there is no cure but I believe that she can live the best life possible for her and to me that will be success.

    Michelle

  11. Dave:
    I think success can be defined differently for everyone. For the alcoholic, it’s not taking a drink that day. So in a way, Success can be defined daily. I’m Bipolar and my success was finally getting on the right “cocktail” of medication, that allows me to live an ordinary life everyday. I’m so thankful to God, my parents, and my friends that stood by me during the adjustment period.
    So I think just examining your day: did I get up and get dressed? Good job! Did I clean my house today? Pat on the back. Did I go to all my classes? Great. Did I accomplish a little more today toward my short term and long term goals? Terrific— and SUCCESSFUL!!!!Small baby steps are success. When you’re more stable the bigger the steps become and you’re able to handle them.
    Webster’s definition is based on a patriarchal sense of community, which definitely is changing as more men and women try to view a little bit of the feminine side of themselves. Success will then be redefined.
    Teri

  12. I believe in sucess I really do but yes sometimes its very hard to believe in and succeed at what I want to do. I have been in and out of the hospital alot in 3 yrs. I also have Borderline Personilty Disorder so it messes with my head and mind alot. All I ever ask is for a little encouragment.

  13. I think success is when you walk in righteousness, integrity, and your life has an influence for good. I think true success is being in a right relationship with God and others. How fortunate is the man who can walk in the destiny God has planned for him.

  14. Hi ,I lost a gf to BP,so I wish I found your site sooner.
    SUCCESS is finding out WHAT you are ,WHO you are,and What your PURPOSE is,and then being Who and What you are,and doing what you are supposed to be doing.

    To KNOW, and to DO, is to BE and BeCOME.

    THEREFORE,

    To Be, or Not To Be, that is the question.

    We can’t change the past but we can seek a higher way of looking at it and get help to be objective.

  15. Dave,

    Success for someone like me who is living with the disorder, has a husband who is also Bipolar and a brother success is living each day to the fullest.
    I am currently going to school, my husband is a USMC, and my brother is a truck driver. We live our lives each day to the fullest what we do not get done is something we have to look forward to the next day.
    It is extremely difficult for me living with the disorder and also having a husband that has the disorder, our lives are always in an uproar. We fight, but we love each other, we take time apart so we can get our heads back on straight and we live life.
    I am becoming a teacher, I want to teach Junior High and High School student’s this is my goal in life has been from a young age, that is success.

    Webster and the rest of those people who think money, power, fame and privilage makes you successful has never lived with this disorder. Living makes you successful, watching your family grow and mature, and make a life for themselves is success.

    This is my take on success, It is only my opnion, but it is an opnion that comes from the bottom of my heart with much sorrow and much pain. To know that the ordinary people according to webster will never be successful hurts.
    If you have raised a family, graduated from high school, got your D.L., went to college, and can hold down a job you are a success. Do not listen to what others have to say, just remember your success may not number in the billions of dollars but your success is worth more than money.

  16. Seeing the President would be FAIlIER. RE: George Troublya Bush.
    Success is to do as you please, NO PSYCH. NO DRUGS! Therefore NO Disorder.
    Success would be to have psych. most drs, the “Law” Polititians, peadifiles, all together for indefinate treatment. I do not know which of these Protected Species is the WORST!
    Dave; Our Debate.

  17. Tori;
    You say you need the “Right coctail of drugs.”
    The Drugs R the disorder, they Destroy the Mind.
    Excercise in the mornings, you may not feel like it, but you get better @ it. Omega 3 (Fish Oil) is good, elevates my Mood. Sunshine, Lots of Water, to Dilute those Vile Drugs.
    Snow Rose, & Something else from Russia. (I have not tried them) Though they are said to be great. Their Athleates, up to the elderly use it. If it fixes Depression in the USSR, well. Speaking of the USSR before the FALL people who spoke out against the Gov. They where FED “Antipsychitics” As the Gov. Knew these Chemicals destroyed ALL thought. Back then they where only 1/10 the strength. Yes Treatment is Punnishment. Hence for Murder you can go to Jail, or Psych Ward. You will NEVER be Sentenced to a Penicillin Shot.
    NO SCIENCE, OR MEDICINE TO BACK ANY OF THE PSYCH. TRADE.
    There is a website curedepressionin3minutes. It is 3 Minutes per Day. One of those CD’s you listen to. The Guy who made it had depression 10 Years or more. He offers a Full Money back Guarentee. I cannot rember the Price, it is about $30 I think.

  18. I think ALL of the above definitions of SUCCESS are right on the money. I feel “successful” if I’m able to get out of bed BEFORE Noon most days, as when I get up later, half the day is gone. I deem it a “success” if I take the time to shower and change my Fentanyl patch every 3 days (sometimes I skip the shower and just wash for the patch!).

    Also, the way I handle interpersonal relationships, leaving both people feeling satisfied and happy/holy, makes me feel “successful.” I’m basically NOT an angry, irritable person, so most of my friends understand where I’m coming from.

    “…and to walk humbly with your God,” also spells “success” for me. I have a GREAT faith and belief system, that I wouldn’t have come this far without. “He walks with me, and He talks with me.” What MORE could I ask for?

    BIG HUGS to all bipolar survivors and those who love us. May God bless you real good. I pray for my country.

    AND, ALSO – you do NOT have to be RICH, or POWERFUL to be successful. Some of the wealthiest people I know are MISERABLE with their money and fame. Personally, I don’t think I could BE famous, like Britney Spears, with all the paparazzzi around; they’d scare me half to death! So – you can HAVE your riches, your fame, AND your power – but you MAY not be “successful.” I’ll take my 2 cats and my condo and my peace of mind over your “success” any day!!

  19. I agree with Roni (#9, I think).
    Peace, having peace, letting it go, searching again, without feeling loss in the search, finding peace. Love, loving. This is success to me.

  20. I agree that if you have bipolar then success has a whole different definition. I’m a bipolar 1 with borderline personality disorder, so everyday I go without loosing my mind is a success. The fact that I’ve been med compliant for 10 years is a success. Each year I go without being hospitalized is a success(5 years now, never thought that would happen). Running my own business for 14 months is a success(sticking with it). Making my marriage work for 16 years is a success.
    When you’re bipolar you have to look at life differently and look at all the small successes and not your life as a whole. Focusing only on life as a whole can drive a bipolar crazy, so don’t forget to look at life one day at a time.

  21. Hi Dave,

    I think success is not in being everything, or doing everything, or having everything, I think true success is being who you are without fear, doing the things that make you and others happy, and being content with whatever it is that you do have. To live in one’s own life and have true contentment with what you have, bipolar or not, supporter or not, if you have it and can be at peace with what you have, good or bad, like being paralyzed. Anyone who is paralyzed and is happy is successful if you ask me. So is the guy with the Porche that is happy and helping people. To accept your lot in life, to give out of your abundance, and to be who you are without fear, all these things define success to me…

    Thanks Dave,
    Bob

  22. Success? I was talking to a niece of mine over the holidays and she paid me one of the nicest compliments I have ever gotten – We were talking about success and failure and she commented that she thought I was successful because I had created a happy life for myself! I have to keep that in mind when I beat myself up for not living up to my own self-imposed lofty goals!

    And as for success dealing with bp – I still have a hard time dealing with my reduced workload – but I am pretty healthy!

  23. Success means accomplishment. Whatever your goals are, if you achieve them you are successful.

  24. Hi Dave. I am new to your site this week. I love the webcasts you do. I listened to four of them today and plan to do it again tomorrow. I don’t have any money right now but when I get my income tax refund, I am going to buy some of your books. I have bipolar disorder. I haven’t been diagnosed by a mental health pro but have had that dignosis at the ER before. I never realized that was what was wrong with me until 2007 after going thru bankruptcy, forclosure, car repoed, upset friends and family, went on drug binges etc… I thought I was different than other people but didn’t know there was a name for it and treatment. Trouble is this right now I am on social services and they want me to go to outpatient rehab but it is for past drug use, what I need is psychiatric care but my general practioner does not believe in bipolar disorder. He has me on zoloft for depression because I have been pretty much depressed since 2006 with a few manic episodes but mostly so depressed that I would just stay in bed for days at a time and seriously considered suicide for several months. My family is great but they don’t understand. I was sexually abused by my father when I was six years old and then he left state and I never saw him again until I was nine. I went home and told my mother who claims she reported the incident to the local police (back in 1976) and they told her that there was no way that they would ever take the word of a kid on something like that! My whole life has been formed around this incident ever since then. I don’t trust men. I have male friends but have completely given up on a male female relationship. I figured if I really care for a person, why would I want to hurt them by getting them to or allowing them to be in love with me. I know I will eventually break their heart or make them miserable. My fathers mother gave my mom and I a book when I was six called “I’m ok, Your’e ok” and that was the treatment that my family provided for me. I had to grow up thinking that what my dad did to me was my fault because my mom said that the cops didn’t believe me so obviously it was me that had done something wrong and not my dad and my mom always told me that it was not her fault what had happpened to me so it must have been my fault, right? Anyways I asked my father (in 2007)to help me pay for a private doctor to get my head straightened out about it, he wanted me to keep my mouth shut and not tell his “new” family of twenty-five years the truth so he wrote me a check for $5000.00 but then once he had a chance to tell them that I was crazy and not to believe me or trust me, he stopped payment on the check and I still have yet to get any mental health help. Now dss wants me to go to drug counseling and county mental health but I DO NOT TRUST THE GOVERNMENT because every time I have ever needed their help, they have failed to help me, like when I was six and they did not believe me. So anyways I refuse to go to counseling with a party that I do not trust and my general practioner will not refer me to a mental health doctor and I don’t have enough cash right now to afford the private health care. I don’t know how I can get the help that I need. Any suggestions would be great! I THINK SUCCESS IS DOING YOUR BEST, HAVING A CERTAIN AMOUNT OF BALANCE IN YOUR LIFE BETWEEN THE THINGS THAT MATTER: FAMILY, BUSINESS OR WORK AND GOD OR YOUR SPIRITUAL SELF. Thank you for sharing all of your knowledge with us. Deb T

  25. Hi David – I agree completely about what you are saying regarding success. Money sometimes doesn’t make people happy especially when you have problems in your life. Its love,devotion and support that I give people and my loved one whose sick that counts as success for me. I know money can help in some ways, but when I see my loved one having some good days, holding a good conversation and able to laugh, that’s really success to me and for those few days I find peace in myself.

  26. I don’t agree with the dictionary success when comes to down to earth people like us.( supporters, ones with mental illnesses, addictions, etc.) I consider myself a success. I am a single mother of a child who has liver disease.( it is under control)I have bipolar and am stable and raising my child with her problems. That is success. I help others with similar problems of my own. I am also an alcoholic. Sober for nine and a half years. Success is realizing we can’t do this alone and asking for help. Success is staying stable or clean one more day. Success means you have to take life and your own personal agenda One Day At A Time and knowing you did get this way over night and you are not going to be better over night. Success is realizing you are human. You are going to make mistakes. Success is being man or woman enough to admit you are wrong or even admit you need help. Success is you. Success is me. SUCCESS!!!

  27. Success is having good day going to bed satisfied you accomplished what you wanted to do. It is working on short term and long term goals and getting things done that need to be done. And yes it is about patting yourself on the back for the things you accomplish and being happy and having happy people around you.
    The definition of success is an individual thing not money or favour.

  28. Hi Dave, success to me means achieving a reasonable and balanced sense of being, where an holistic approach in all our “compartments” of living is attained. Attaining these goals might be difficult and varies from individual to individual, yet we should strive to fullfil it. Thanks for all the information in my quest to be in control of my health.
    Clark, Cape Town,South Africa

  29. If I am in the world and not of the world I think I’m on the right path. Success to me is something that cannot be measured, at least not all the time. It’s the small victories overcoming self when not well and staying on a healthy path by adhering to my therapy regimen. Small successes but for me, that is big.

    It’s when my husband comes home and is smiling. When I do whatever job is in front of me to the best of my ability. Success is learning every day, coming away with more then the day before and passing it on. Paying it forward if you will.

    When I was working, I was paying the bills, doing all those things people do to live, functioning as well as I could. I was successful at it but unhappy for other reasons. So, knowing what makes us happy is half of the battle. Attaining it is the other half. Knowing what makes us tick. Achieving health and happiness the best way I know how. I think knowing what it isn’t can also help me define what success is. I want to be the best I can be for me, for my family and friends and for people in general. If my life touches another in a good and positive way, I’ve succeeded. I just want to be a good person. I want to mark my existence by what I have done… What I can do…What I will do. To me, success is having done what you thought you might never have achieved, no matter what it is. Making moves above and beyond self expectation. Going the extra mile. Is this winded enough for you? LOL :o)

  30. Thanks for your emails Dave. 😀

    Success is just what you said. Success is different for every person because my goals are different from the goals of others. Because we’re all different, different circumstances, different persons, different everything… so no one can tell that success is a specific something because success is something everyone build up themselves. If I reach what I proposed myself to reach, then I’m successful, no matter what my goal was. I love sharing this things! Is so great! do you reply this?

    😀

    Brenda Lee

  31. I think success is a regular day. Get out of bed, take my meds, exercise, eat nutritious food, work when I have it, relax and watch tv, a movie, or read a book. A regular day is the short term goal and a string of regular days is the long term goal. I wish that for you, too

  32. I think it’s all in your perspective..wealth, favor, power? Yes, I do agree with Webster’s definition.
    My children and I are not starving. We have a roof over our heads, and clothes on our back…we have enough to offer others in need…so yes,…I am wealthy.
    I have managed to keep more than 20 plus friends for over 20 plus years. My children love me, and I have a good relationship with all my family members…so yes, I have favor.
    I make the decisions each day how I will respond to what the world sends my way….so yes,…I have power.
    Once again…it’s about prespective…depends on how YOU view Webster’s words.
    Thank you Dave for your dedication.

  33. I guess your latest column about having the right doctor really is starting to apply to me. My P-doc has said to me each time on my last two visits that it’s about time I go on disability. She does specialize in mood disorders, and I have been seeing her for almost 20 years now, but she tells me that I’m at the end of the line medication-wise and has added Xanax XR 10 mg twice a day, which really sedates me so I only take it once a day. She also says that I’m just going to get worse as I go through menopause. I guess you could say she just took my hope away and I don’t feel anyone, even a physician, has the right to do that. My psychologist isn’t even all that sure that I’ve got bipolar disorder. She’s proposed the idea that I may have had a one-time psychotic break. I was tested by her and found to have borderline personality disorder, which, upon finding out more about it, fits me to a “T” I’m sorry to say, but at least it’s something fixable, even if it does take a long time and lots of therapy. My psychologist has recommended a second opinion, and I’m going to get one. First because of the possibility of misdiagnosis, and second, because of the 300 mile round trip I currently make to see my P-doc. It’s just getting to be too much. Not to mention that this MD is an out-of-network provider and there’s not much insurance coverage, so I’m paying a lot out of pocket. I am not naive. Psychiatric disorders run on my paternal side. I am not looking particularly for someone to say that it was all a mistake, and that I’m not bipolar at all. Quite to the contrary, I’m seeking a fresh perspective, one that leaves me some hope for my future mental health.

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