Hi,

Do you remember the Sixties? (That’s the 1960’s.) I mean, like the Hippies, and all the hoopla

about “being yourself,” doing what you wanted to do, doing it “if it feels good,” and all that? Well, there was a real big emphasis back then on individuality. Now, I know this may be a controversial subject, but…I think everyone has a right to their own individuality. I mean, I know it’s important to fit in and all, I’m not saying that. In fact, I’m one of the greatest speakers against stigma against the mentally ill, like people with bipolar disorder and all, and how they should be able to fit into society and not be treated any differently than someone who doesn’t have a mental illness.

But what I’m talking about is individuality, and how we need to respect each other’s right to be an individual. See, we all have different roles that we take on, different roles that we play in life, according to our responsibilities. So you might be a husband or wife, father or mother, son or daughter, brother or sister, nephew or niece, etc. And these are all different roles. In addition, you might also have a role as a student…Or in whatever career you have chosen…Or whatever talent you have (writer, artist, musician, actor, etc.). These are roles, too. And then you have your role as a supporter to a loved one with bipolar disorder. And that’s a REAL important role that you have. Your loved one depends on you in that role. And you do have responsibilities in that role, too.

You try to take care of your loved one the best that you can, don’t you? You try to be the very best bipolar supporter that you can be. That’s only natural. And that’s a good thing, I’m commending you for that, because I know it isn’t easy, believe me! I’ve been there, so I can relate! It’s a difficult role to play at best. But you do it, because it IS a role that you’ve taken on.

As one of my friends says: “It is what it is.” And most of the time you probably don’t mind it…

But maybe some of the time you’re like some of the supporters I’ve heard from who feel like

their individuality is getting swallowed up in their role as bipolar supporter. And this bothers them. Well, if you feel this way, too, you may be wondering what you can do about it. For one thing, you need to fight against it. As in, not letting the bipolar disorder win and you lose. And yes, it is like a battle or a war. And bipolar disorder is like your enemy (and NOT your loved one, as you may sometimes feel). You need to fight for control over the bipolar disorder. And, in this case, you need to fight to take your individuality back.

So one of the best things you can do is to maintain an identity separate from your role as a supporter to your loved one. Make sure you do things outside the home that you enjoy, like going out to eat with family and friends, or even going shopping by yourself. As long as it is something that makes you feel good, and something that brings you self-esteem in your identity as an individual. Hobbies can be good for that, too. Again, as something that you enjoy and makes you feel good.

Well, I have to go!

Your Friend,

Dave