Hi,
How’s it going?
I hope things are going ok for you today.
I have a friend who went back to college at a later age, and she had a lot of problems with it.
Seems it’s not so easy if you don’t go to college right after high school, because for one thing, you get out of the habit of studying.
For another thing, she said, it seemed, at least to her, that it was harder to absorb the information.
She was in college with a lot of young people, and they seemed to get the subject material much easier than she did, and it was very frustrating for her.
She had to study very, very hard.
Eventually, though, after much hard work on her part, she finally got it, and went on to get her
college degree.
She said it was one of the hardest things she ever did in her life.
I asked her if it was worth it, though.
And she said, “Definitely.”
What does this have to do with bipolar disorder?
Well, I’ll tell you.
There is a lesson to be learned from this story.
There is something that I call the Bipolar Disorder Learning Curve.
In other words, just like my friend in college, they didn’t just hand her that college diploma the first day of school and say thanks for coming, did they?
There was a whole lot she had to learn before she could earn that college diploma, and it was hard. Very hard for her.
Well, it’s the same thing with bipolar stability.
I go over this in my courses/systems. How you have to learn all you can about bipolar disorder, first of all. But then you have to build on that knowledge. That’s the learning curve. Stability
doesn’t happen overnight.
SUPPORTING AN ADULT WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
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http://www.bipolarsupporter.com/report11
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HAVE BIPOLAR DISORDER?
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Like I said, you have to keep learning in order to become stable with bipolar disorder.
You don’t get it right the first time, or the first day, or even the first month.
Stability takes time.
It involves a learning curve.
It took my mother 20 years!
It took Michele (who works for me) 10 years!
I’ve talked to other people who’ve told me it took them many years as well.
And you have to constantly work at it.
You can’t just assume that it will take care of itself.
As far as learning about bipolar disorder itself, new information is coming out all the time, so you have to stay on top of it.
You have to stay on top of your medications, too. And you should be informed about them.
Work hand-in-hand with your doctors and mental health professionals. Learn what they know about the disorder, the course of it, and how it relates to you.
When it comes to your doctors and your therapist, don’t be afraid to ask how you’re coming along. You should learn as much as you can about what they think about your progress. You should be a part of your own treatment, as much as you can be.
Learn how to communicate with your supporters. You have to tell them what you need from them. Find out who can help with what, and then let them help you. It’s up to you. They can’t help you if you don’t communicate with them. This, too, is part of the learning curve.
Learn about yourself. Learn what your triggers are. What makes you better and what makes
you worse.
Learn how to manage your bipolar disorder. Learn how to recognize when a bipolar episode is coming on, so you can head it off at the pass.
You have to respect the bipolar disorder learning curve, so that you can get better.
And remember that it doesn’t happen overnight.
Has the learning curve worked for you?
Post responses below
Hi Dave.
Yes, I learned a great deal about bipolar disorder from all of your e-mails,
some more than others, of course.
In this last note, you reiterated how important it is not to abandon someone
while they are in an episode – I agree with that whole heartedly, it makes
for good common sense; BUT, what if, on the other hand, your close, best
friend with bipolar abandons YOU?! That is exactly what happened to me & it
has been VERY HURTFUL. I have often been depressed, anxious, angry &
stressed out over this whole situation because he used to want & need me and
my company/ support, and then suddenly, he throws everything we had away &
has treated me like trash!! I read & learned to understand the illness
disease much better, although it is now ‘too late’. With my reading &
learning about bipolar disorder from your messages, he feels that I’m
invading his personal life & his head space, which tells you how rebellious,
angry & ‘crazy’ he can be! He no longer wants anything to do with me, even
though I’d been his best friend & best support person. I also invested a lot
of my time, energy, money & generosity with this man, so I’m sure you can
see/ understand why it all upset & hurt me so much – to the point where I’ve
had to seek counselling & be on more medication too. I am slowly getting
over the strong relationship we had; it is not easy, it’s step by step and
one day at a time.
Regards & thanks,
E.
hi there Dave,
I’m a supporter: this blog relates to those who are supporters as well. We also can’t rush things expect our loved ones to get the new way of doing things straight off. Whats really good about this particular blog is it gives insight into prevailing BP recovery for supporters to take heed.we go through learning curves as well and these very helpful blogs makes that curve less of a steep mountainous one , so thanks for that Dave
Regards
Shona
David,your report has helped me in manys ways.we homeschooled my 17 year old last year and we were told he would have a seat this year hes made to a jumnior and i know he will not return to public school its to hard on him emotionally and physically and it really put stress on me. can you help me or find omeone who can so my son homeschooled so i can see him get that diploma.now sice all this happened hes become dpressed and wants to sleep alot can you help me???PLease!
I have constantly been on a “learning curve” for 41 years. Though all of my major hospitalizations for mania happened in my 20s (1960s-70s), I am STILL very aware of its insiduous nature. For instance – what I “think” is a physical problem, really turns out to be a “mental” problem. My “mind/body” connection is so strong, that any intense stress going on around me, ends up as a somatic (bodily) complaint.
For instance – right now, I’m suffering with severe vertigo and go for a brain MRI on Tuesday. It’s highly possible that the financial and other stressors, have a hand in it. BUT – the dizziness is REAL, not imagined. It feels as if the room is spinning; sort of like the worst hangover you’ve ever had! If they DON’T find anything on the MRI, then it’s back to the drawing board with my psychiatrist and/or therapist to uncover the underlying CAUSE.
I went back to college in my 30s, to get my third year of school in order to read for the law. I found that I fit in right well with the younger students, and had a GREAT time socializing with them. Even my grades were good! It was a Junior College, so I guess the mix of young and old was varied. Don’t be afraid you won’t “fit in” if you go back to school; with the technological advances they have now – computers, MP3s, iPhones, etc. – there are MANY ways to access the information you will need for class.
Yes, it’s been a LONG journey, and I have been relatively stable for 30 years. I’m in my 60s now, and look back on how I acted in my manic episodes with a tinge of regret. I can’t ask my Mother for forgiveness of putting her through my episodes, though she never recognized the fact that I HAD a mental illness. Perhaps that was for the best…I still look over my shoulder for the “bipolar” to creep up on me, and well I should. There being no “cure,” it seems it NEVER lets go of you once it’s inhabited your life.
BIG HUGS to all bipolar survivors and those who love us. May God bless you real good. I pray for my country.
I agree on the learning curve for bi-polar disorder. We are constantly searching and learning, and sometimes it seems we may be more familiar with what’s going on than our daughter’s doctors. Then again, insurance has caused us to have to change from one of the greatest doctors in the world, and every time you get a new doctor with a kid, it seems you are starting all over again.
However, I have to say something about going to college as an adult. I was a horrible high school student. I graduated by the hairs of my chin. I went to college in my 30’s, and the hardest part for me was financing it. My GPA’s ranged from 3.5 to 4.0. I just ask that you please be careful suggesting people have to go to college right out of high school. That is not always the case. Each individual learns better at different times in their lives. For some, right out of high school may work best. For me, I needed the extra time to develop the desire and maturity to learn.